Day 5
I can not take this any longer. This is insane. I believe that I am going insane. Yang said she would call me this morning but I got nothing. I was tempted to throw the phone out the window or smash it, but I didn't want to destroy one of ruby's phones.
I felt better when she talked to me. Yesterday and Wednesday is the days that we talked all day long. I fell asleep during both the calls because I felt tired. Yang clearly had more energy than me.
Her voice. She managed to keep the conversation going with the positive vibe I know so well. But that didn't last long very much. She broke down during one of our conversations. And she told me how much she missed me.
It was as clear as day. The pain in her voice and the yearn she oh so clearly desired. And as a result, I broke down too. I needed to hear those words as to how much she needed to hear my words.
I miss her. I miss her warmth. I miss her touch. I miss her voice. I miss my home. She is my home. A home I never want to abandon. But she's not here. So I have nothing.
I have no idea how many days we have left. I just want it to go as quick as possible. I want this insanity to end. I want to go home.
I lay on the carpet floor with my arms spread out at my sides. I stare at the white ceiling with a blank expression. I sniffle, blinking a few times. I think I tired myself out by crying. A lot.
This is not pleasant. Like my life is slowly draining each second of the day. I don't know what to do. I already cried myself out. I want to scream. I want to lash out at something or someone. I just want to go home. But, she's not here. So, no
Now that I think about it, I don't know what we are. I want to tell her how I feel. I want to tell her everything. I'm sick of hiding. I want to be free. I want to be free with her.
I should have told her earlier. Even if she was just a mindless soldier that came back from the war of remnant. But she came back. She came back to the yang I know so well.
" I should have done something! ". I yell out angrily. I felt angry all of the sudden. A sharp pain emitting from my right hand. " Ow! ". I yell out sitting up. I clutch at my hand, gritting my teeth. Crap, that hurts so bad.
I wince, starting to get a headache. " Come on ". I said shaking my head. I hold my hand to my stomach, the headache growing immensely. I then put my left hand on the side of my head.
" Gah! ". I yell out in pain. A sharp pain going through my head. I felt dizzy, like I'm about to throw up any second now. " STOP IT! ". I scream. Tears form in my eyes as I fall to my side on the floor.
The pain was slowly spreading throughout my body. Sending waves and waves of pain each few seconds. I sob uncontrollably. I felt anger, fear, sadness and pain. I'm scared. I'm so, so scared.
I clutch to my head as I keep sobbing non-stop. The pain didn't stop spreading and my head was the worse. A sharp ringing in my ears that hurt my cat ears too. I have no idea what to do.
I gasp, the pain stopping. My hands go limp off my head as I instantly close my eyes. Falling into a very, deep sleep...
- Dreamland -
" You don't have that much time left ".
I scream, jumping up from my slumber. I pant as I take a look around the room. The room was pitch black but half of it was a bright yellow. I turn my head forward and my eyes widen when I see myself. Half of my body is black while the other was bright yellow.
" Ummm... Excuse me? ". I said in confusion. She looked at me with the same expression I had when I was feeling low. She points to myself and I look down. I gasp when all of my scars were now shown present.
I was only wearing a bra and shorts. I look back up at her and she frowned. What is going on? " The process of your adapting will be complete on the first of May ". She said with a mellow tone.
I stand up, wincing at the pain in my arms. I felt weak to even stand on my two feet. I start panting, feeling a warm liquid down my stomach and leg. I look down and gasp when the stab wound was open.
" What the hell! ". I yell shocked. I look back to her and she was bleeding as well. " The pain is reflecting on us. It reveals itself in many ways, and this is just the start ". She said and I frown.
" It's bad enough that I'm separated from yang. I can't... Wait, did you say the first of May? ". I said and she nods. That's nine days away. OH MY-
" You mean to tell me, that I have to fucking wait another nine days!?! That's two weeks! ". I yell angrily. She then nodded slowly. " Why! ". I yell walking to her. She stared at me with a gloom expression, unfazed by my threatening composure.
" This process is the most rarest process in human kind. The limit is a month but no one has ever been able to wait two weeks. It means you and yang have a remarkably powerful bond ". She said as I stand Infront of her.
" What if neither of us make it? What if one of us kill ourselves? What about me? ". I said in scared tone. She then shook her head. " Right now, yang is having the same dream as you ". She said in a low tone. I felt tears form in my eyes at the information.
" How is she doing? ". I ask and she frowns deeply. " Her aura is out of control. Your darkness is greatly affecting her whole being ". She said and I let out a choked sob. This is all my fault.
" But do not fret, if neither of you think you can't make it, you will survive. You love her, don't you? Isn't that, by itself, saying that she is worth fighting for? ".
Love? Wait, hold on-
- End of Dreamland -
I awake from the dream to feel that the pain has subsided. My eyes open slowly as I blink a few times to adjust my vision. I stare at the red carpet with the thought of what my aura just said.
She was right. No- I was right. Yang is worth fighting for. I won't afford to lose my home. And I don't give a damn if anyone is opposed to that.
I love Yang Xiao Long.