A week later, Savannah still hadn't gathered the courage to call Aiden. Every time Leanne brought it up, she changed to a new topic, not wanting to admit her own cowardice.
"How was school?" Her dad peered over the top of his paper as she let herself into the house.
"Good. I'm making a snack before I do my homework." She fluttered her fingers and dropped her backpack in her room before heading into the kitchen. The card stuck to the fridge taunted her as she poured a cold drink, fixed a plate of fruit and cheese, and shut herself in her room. The pile of homework kept her busy until dinner.
Her dad cast glances across the table during their silent meal. "You want to talk about it?"
Savannah shrugged, pushing the last of her mashed potatoes around her plate. "I told Leanne about Aiden."
"Oh?"
Tears pricked at her eyes. "I promised I'd call him, but how can I?"
Ross reached out to capture her hand. "Is that what's bothering you? You want to talk to Aiden?"
She hung her head, squishing her potatoes and inspecting the pattern left from the tines of her fork.
"Call him. If you want to see him, I'll fly you to Chicago."
She lifted her chin. "You will?"
"This is a difficult situation, and it's no secret I wished you'd never pursued it. Now you've involved Aiden." Her dad shrugged. "I like him. It's best you get to know him. You've had these burning questions about who would give up a child and some notions about why. Maybe this will set your mind at peace."
Her lips tugged downward. How would she make amends? Would Aiden even speak to her?
"He told me you should contact him when you're ready."
Savannah's frown deepened.
"You've been beating yourself up about how it all unfolded, but don't. He understands how hard it was for you to hear and he sure didn't want to be saying it. Don't discount how difficult that was for him, and remember, it changes nothing. You are and always will be his child. It wasn't his choice to walk away. Not when you were born, and not after his last visit. Don't back out now. I'm certain you'd regret it."
It was humbling to realize as hard as this was, her dad supported her, giving her the freedom and support to pursue the answers. Perhaps this call wouldn't be so bad, and she owed it to Aiden to make the effort. She had dragged him into the middle of her own personal drama without warning.
Her mind remained occupied for the rest of the evening, and finally, she summoned the courage to snatch the card off the fridge and take it to her room. With damp palms and a pounding heart, she dialed the number. When his voice mail answered, she choked up, unable to leave a message. After pacing back and forth several times, she redialed.
This time he answered on the first ring. "Savannah?"
"Do you have time to talk?"
"Everything okay?"
"Umm ... are you sure it's okay I called? It's late, sorry."
"I'm glad you did."
"I'm sorry about my behavior on your last visit." She sucked in an audible breath. "I'm disappointed and angry because my mother doesn't want me but it was wrong to yell at you," she said as she sank onto her bed.
"I'm sorry too. You went through all of that, and you didn't get what you wanted."
"I shouldn't have blamed you. It's not your fault. I'll never know my mother, will I?"
"I wish it could be different, but there's nothing more I can do."
"Do you want to get to know me?"
"Yes, but maybe it's not what's best for you. You have a dad who loves you, and I don't want to interfere or create issues in your life. The selfish part of me would love to see you, but if it's not what you want, then I'll let it go."
"Just like that?"
He took a deep breath. "I got the impression you'd prefer I left you alone, but I'd love to see you."
"Even after I was so awful? I said things that weren't very nice."
"I'm sure I said many not-so-nice things when I was a teenager."
A hesitant laugh escaped as she closed her eyes, picturing the teenage boy in the photo.
"I can forgive a few angry words, especially considering this strange and emotional situation we find ourselves in."
"It is that." As much as it pained her, she wanted Aiden to understand why she'd reacted the way she had. "I assumed you'd show up with her. Not having her appear hurt, and I forgot that I found at least part of what I was searching for. I'd like to get to know you too."
"What does your dad say?"
"He wants me to see you," she said. "Can I visit you in Chicago sometime?" She wrapped a lock of hair around her finger. "Maybe I could come around Christmas, after my exams. What do you think?"
Aiden cleared his throat. "I'd like that. I have tons of room so you could stay here rather than at a hotel."
Her heart lightened at the thought. "I'll check my school schedule and send you some dates."
"I'm glad you called. I look forward to seeing you."
"Me too. Goodnight, Aiden."
"Night, Savannah."
----
Savannah spent the next day contemplating her talk with Aiden and discussing the trip with Leanne. Now she needed to confirm her plans with her dad.
She threw chopped onions into the pan. They sizzled as she gave a quick stir. "Daddy?"
"Hmmm?" He looked up from his task of opening the can of tomato sauce. "Darn can opener. It's almost impossible. We need a new one."
Savannah took over, spinning the can and popping the top off.
Ross tipped the sauce into the pan with the diced vegetables, a slight grin turning up the corners of his mouth. "What would I do without you?"
"Starve?" She giggled as she stirred the contents of the pan. She loved these times with her dad, especially since they'd lost her mom.
Her dad gave her a quizzical look. "You had a question?" He filled the large pasta pot with water, dropping in a pinch of salt as it joined the sauté pan on the stove.
"I called Aiden."
"You did?" He leaned back against the table.
"Uh-huh." She scooped a spoonful of sauce and offered it to him.
"Needs basil, but it's good," he said. "What happened with Aiden?"
"I apologized." She brushed a strand of errant hair from her cheek before sprinkling more of the herb over top.
"What did he say?"
"He forgave me, and I asked to visit in December after my exams." Savannah opened the ravioli and poured it into the boiling water.
"You've decided to see him?"
"I can stay in his guest room if I go to Chicago. Is that okay?"
Her dad nodded. "Your mom would have liked Aiden a great deal, and she'd be happy you have the opportunity to know your father."
"I miss her."
"Me too." Her dad sighed. "Your mom said you were the best gift she ever received. It was right about this time of year when we got the news. Another couple backed out of adopting you at the last minute. We were next on the list."
Savannah had heard this story countless times. Her parents were pushing forty and about to resign themselves to being childless when they received the call. "Mom said I was her Christmas Angel." She hugged him, resting her head on his chest. "I can stay with Aiden?"
"I'd prefer it to you being alone in a hotel." Her dad pressed a kiss to her temple.
"Thank you." She pecked his cheek. "This means a lot to me."
After a subdued dinner, she returned to her room and called Aiden, happy that he answered right away. "I talked to my dad and texted you some dates."
"I'll book your flights. I'm more than happy to cover them." His tone became serious. "Have Ross call if it's a problem, okay?"
"I'll tell him." Savannah flopped on her back across the bed and nibbled at her nails. "Do you have a girlfriend?"
"Yes. Emily's a doctor who works with me at the hospital."
"Can I meet her?" Her inquiry was met with a deep silence. "Are you still there?"
"Sorry, can I give it some thought? She doesn't know about you yet."
"Why not?"
"Complicated." Aiden's laugh sounded nervous and Savannah let out a long sigh. "I keep saying it's complicated, don't I."
"Do you really like Emily? Do you think you'll date her for a while?"
"Yes. Which means I should introduce you, right?"
"Unless you don't really want to." Savannah plumped up her pillow and closed her eyes.
"I've waited a long time for a chance to know you. I hope you feel the same way. This will get easier, I'm sure."
"Why haven't you told Emily?"
"It's not that I don't want her to know, but it's so new. Both meeting you and dating her, and I didn't think you'd want to see me again. I've held off the big discussions with friends and family."
It seemed he harbored the same fears as she had. "If we're going to get to know each other, I want to meet the people who are important to you." Savannah twirled her hair around her finger. "I hope I meet her."
After they'd said goodnight, Savannah flopped out her arm, dropping the phone beside her on the bed. A small smile crept across her face. A couple weeks and she'd be in Chicago again. Curiosity burned. What was he really like? Where did he live? A million-and-one questions zipped through her brain.
It left her with mixed feelings. She turned her wrist, the light dance across the gold band of the watch. Her mom kept it safe for her, and it had belonged to the woman who'd given her life, but that woman wanted nothing to do with her. Suddenly, she couldn't bear looking at it. It was simply a reminder of everything she'd never have.
Savannah tucked the watch inside a jewelry box hidden in her dresser drawer. As she shoved it to the back, she vowed to move on, not wanting any further reminders of the mother who'd forsaken her.