Third Person POV
"The blasing sun adds to the heat of the action as the racers face the new challenge, the Long Coral area! The Cutie Wagon is still in the lead, while the Barrel Tiger continues its desperate pursuit!"
"What's this? The are is covered with giant corals..." Robin murmurs uneasily. Indeed, facing the Straw Hat crew is a veritable forest of pale-colored coral, stretched out of its normal height from just being native to Long Ring Long Land (the name of the island Raya has yet to learn).
"Hey, look," Nami says slowly, squinting as she takes in the swirling currents trailing in and out of the coral, a maze most wouldn't be able to navigate. "Because of that, the sea currents are moving strangely. We probably shouldn't just blindly charge in..."
"Don't forget!" the announcer chirps, still flying above the racers and commenting on the littlest of things. Back among the rest of the Straw Hats, Raya has the sudden urge to ask Sanji to prepare roasted sparrow. "There is someone on dry land waiting to unleash his wrath! He is our Boss, Foxy the Silver Fox!"
"No one can survive my evil schemes," Foxy chuckles, still riding atop the strange monkey named Hamburg. "Get ahead of them, Hamburg!"
"Okay, Boss!"
Foxy, or rather Hamburg, quickly accelerates, dashing on all fours to move past the anxious racers heading for the Long Coral.
On the other side of the island, the announcer's reports keep coming in, much to Raya's dismay.
"What is he planning?! What exciting things will happen next?!"
"Go get him boss!" the crew of the Sexy Foxy (Foxy's ship) sing. "Yahoo! It's only a matter of time now!"
"Who else wants to fight?" Luffy demands, growing tired of the constant chanting against his nakama. A cook for the Foxy Pirates suddenly appears behind Luffy, holding a ladel in one hand and tapping the Straw Hat captain's shoulder with the other. "Yo, boy," he greets with a messy smile. "Want something to eat?"
Oh, Luffy's eternal weakness strikes again!
"Here's some inari sushi and kitsune udon!" another pirate says cheerily, offering the described food to the rival captain with a flourish. "All free!" he sings, and Luffy's mouth begins to water beyond belief. Drool spills over his dropped jaw, trickling down to the ground in a disgusting fashion.
"Really!! Thanks a ton! It looks delitiouth!" The last part is churned and gargled from the river of spittle trailing down his face.
It would seem Luffy isn't the only Straw Hat to be sidetracked so easily. Sanji, surrounded by beautiful women in revealing clothing (yet all still wearing the ridiculous mask indicative of the Foxy Pirates), has never been happier in his life. The only thing he can imagine that would in fact make the moment more perfect, was if Nami, Robin and Raya were there also.
(A/N: Raya: I would rather melt Honoo down, remake it into a hammer, and beat myself to death with it than join in that moronic display of.... grossness)
"I like you best, pretty-chef-boy chef! Come here," one of the women purrs, causing the most perverted expression to cross his face. "Ehehehe! It seems like losing isn't half-bad here," he giggles (yes, a grown man just giggled), thoroughly enjoying having the women cuddling up to him and half-sprawled on his lap.
Chopper, sadly, is probably the easiest to distract among the Straw Hats. Another of the Foxy Pirates simply hands him a shining, caramel-coated candy apple, and his eyes light up as he licks the excess cotton candy from his lips. "What's that?" he asks. "Is it sweet?"
Zoro is... well, Raya would surely describe this as pathetic. The most untrusting of the Straw Hats, and he's simply sitting among the Foxy Pirates, throwing back mug after mug of sake. Grinning like he couldn't be happier.
"We're running outta sake over here!" a loud, heavy-set pirate laughs, tapping mugs with Zoro. "This brother sure can drink!"
"You're up next round right?" another pirate asks, speaking to his buddy. "Show me some spirits!"
"Hehe, is this a little awkward?" a third pirate chuckles.
The only Straw Hat to remain unswayed? Of course it's Raya! Several men already tried to distract her from the race, but she growled at them to leave her the hell alone, and they backed off quickly. She stands close to the water, head titled to the side, listening for the next announcement to tell her how the others are fairing.
"I feel so much pity for all of you right now," she murmurs, casting dirty looks at the remaining Straw Hats. She sighs in exasperation. How gullible is her crew? She knew about Luffy, and Chopper, and could've guessed Sanji would be decieved this easily if women were involved, but Zoro... What won't he do for sake? Freaking alcoholic.
She tips her head back, jolting from her thoughts, when the slight crackle of static signals the return of the commentary.
"Uh-oh. What happened?! Barrel Tiger suddenly slowed down! Using this opportunity, Cutie Wagon extends her lead!! She is entering the Long Coral area~~~"
"Suddenly slowed down...?" Raya echoes, hooding her eyes in thought. "What could have happned?"
"Hey! Nami!" Usopp calls, looking over at his orange-haired crew mate worriedly. "What are you doing? Row!"
"Charge, Monda!" Porche urges, pointing straight out towards the Long Coral. "Go!"
Nami watches on, smirking in satisfaction, when the shark-pulled boat spins around in the almost unreadable currents, eventually being spit back out into the open sea like they made a instantaneous U-turn.
"Eh...?" Usopp mutters, looking out at the unexpected scene. "It turned around..."
"Ooooh!? Cutie Wagon suddenly moved backward?! What is happening?!"
The Cutie Wagon tries again, with the same exact results as the previous attempt. "They turned around again," Usopp comments, with his signature bug-eyed, slack-jawed look. "I knew it," Nami says proudly, taking hold of her oar again. "The current is the key here. It's our turn. Let's go."
"How tragic!!! No matter how many times the Cutie Wagon tries to go forward, it gets pushed back! On the other hand, the Barrel Tiger has begun to move forward again. Now the two boats are tackling the coral area!"
Just as the Straw Hat crew reaches the edge of the Long Coral forest, thick, rolling smoke settles over the whole area, blanketing the world in a puff of white. "Eh?" Robin says in alarm, being the first one to take notice of the newest obstacle. "Wha? What's that?" Usopp asks, starting to panic.
"This... This is.... That dangerous man.... has made his move! What a dirty, dirty trick! Without their eyes, the Barrel Tiger will risk running into something every time they move! Now that is a model villain!"
"Gah! This smoke!" Usopp cries, as he and Nami deftly try to swat the clouds of white away. They fail. Miserably. And yet, there is no resounding crash, no crunch of wood against the hard-packed coral as the Barrle Tiger slips forward into the current. And soon, the tiny boat sails straight for the smoke, emerging unscathed into the heart of the coral.
"Impossible!! They passed it without breaking a sweat!! Not only that, the Barrel Tiger is zooming through the forest of corals and making amazing progress!! Yet, the Cutie Wagon remains stuck at the edge of the coral!!"
"Why is this happening?" Usopp asks in awe, holding the oar over his shoulder as he stares at the coral, that he originally thought to be too dangerous to tackle, as they pass by without difficulty."The boat is moving on its own?!"
"Yup," Nami says. "This place is a maze of currents."
"Maze of currents?"
"Because of the giant whirlpool behind the corals, a chain of smaller whirlpools are formed in this area! All I needed to do was to determine the correct path and the currents would take us through! With that, we can literally pass through this place with our eyes closed," she adds, demonstrating.
"Awesome!" Luffy cheers. "Witness the skills of our amazing navigator!!"
But all too soon, Usopp's panic returns, as the commentary keeps up, still reaching the Straw Hats' ears despite their efforts to ignore him. "Don't celebrate just yet!" he warns. "The terrifying Long Whirlpool is up next!"
"Do long things come in pairs, too?! Gyaaaaaaa!"
"Usopp, stop screaming!" Nami chastises as she looks out at the churning, writhing water pulling them closer and closer, whispering about their demise and shouting for their misfortune. "Get ready to use the Impact Dial," she instructs, to which Usopp's jaw drops. "Otherwise, the whirlpool will swallow us."
"So calm..." he says, worried, anxious tears streaming from his own bugging eyes. "D-Did you plan all of this in the beginning?!"
Nami gives no answer, and Usopp eventually consents, seeing how close they are to being sucked down into the depths of the Long Whirlpool. Once more, he reaches out over the edge of the boat, the Impact Dial bandaged to his hand held over the water. He gulps nervously, then sets off the Dial. In the next instant, the Barrel Tiger is flying, soaring over the whirlpool and even leaving the water so far behind as to sail past the Long Gap!
And all the while, Itomimizu is commenting on the whole thing... Yet the only Straw Hat paying attention is Raya, who lets out a cheer of excitement before glowering at the Foxy Pirates who through he annoyed glares.
The Straw Hats land safely, though Usopp has been knocked out from the trauma of using the Impact Dial so many times, but quickly lose their sense of security when they hear Capote the Fishman call out, "Don't count us out yet! Fusion! Turbo Sharkman!"
Their tactic basically consists of Capote being held within Monda's jaws, and using their combined strength to pull Porche forward while she rests in the Cutie Wagon.
"It's not over yet! They have the combined strength of the Fishman with the tail of the shark! The blazing boat shatters all the corals in its way to catch up with the leader!!..... The race is halfwar done and in the lead we have the ever-struggling Barrel Tiger!"
"Usopp, wake up!"
"Where am I...?!?"
"I think I twisted my wrist..."
Robin looks up, catching sight of something she wasn't expecting. "Look, it's a sign," she says, faintly gesturing to the wooden sign placed directly in their path, bearing an arrow and a message to "turn right".
"Ok! Let's turn right, now!" Nami says, smiling. Then she suddenly lunges to the front of the boat and rockets a devastating punch to the "innocent" sign, shattering the wood in one go. "Not!" she grunts. "Only an idiot would've fallen for that!"
"Amazing! They saw through Boss' trick #18: 'Fake Sign Attack'!” Itomimizu shouts in shock, while Foxy gapes in astonished horror. “What a formidable foe! Is this woman untrusting of everything in the world?!”
“Be quiet, slime ball!”
“She’s profane, too! Anyway’s, the race continues and the Barrel Tiger faces a new challenge. Shooting high into the air, it’s the Long Ripple!”
The Barrel Tiger desperately tries to navigate through the pillars of water shooting up from the depths, nearly launching them skyward. Miraculously, they move onward through the race, leaving the troublesome water spot behind.
But soon, they’re faced with another problem.
Foxy’s terrible acting.
Hamburg, dressed in patched and sodden-looking clothing, kneels beside a very poorly disguised Foxy, who is attempting to appear as a frail, troubled grandmother on her last leg. “Granny…. Granny….!! Granny….” Hamburg sobs, in a high-pitched voice reserved for either toddlers, or those who, to their misfortune, have been kicked in the most sensitive of places
“Ah… I can’t move….” Foxy coughs, doing a horrible job of imitating an elderly woman in need.
“And now, our Boss strikes once more…”
“Excuse me, captain of that boat, please pity us and help…” Foxy pleads, but the Straw Hats just brush him off and continue on their way.
“She pretends that she didn’t see them! Nami the navigator is also very heartless and cruel!!”
“You’re annoying, idiot!!" Nami shouts irritably. "I would never fall for that!!"
"Very profane!!"
And soon, despite all the setbacks, the Straw Hats come upon what they've been looking for all along...
"Look! Over there! It's the finish line!" Usopp cries out, pointing towards a hastily constructed banner seated in the water before them, with the word GOAL scrawled across the white background.
The Straw Hats keep sailing straight for the "Goal", though the Cutie Wagon is rapidly making their comeback....
"Didn't I tell you to quit it already!!" Nami yells, knocking down one post holding up the banner as the Barrel Tiger stays true to its name and barrels forward past the wreckage. Once again, Foxy is horrified at how his trick was so easily discovered and countered.
"The real finish line must be close," Robin notes, while the three of them hunker down in the barrel boat, steadily sailing around the entire length of the island. "Hey, I can't do another Impact, by the way!" Usopp warns them, still feeling the aftereffects of his previous three uses of the Impact Dial. Chopper would have a tough time of checking out his protesting arm and shoulder.
"I know," Nami responds, eyes fixed on a point ahead of them, heart kicking faster at the thought of winning.
And, not-so-sadly, Porche and her team have completely stopped at the fake finish, falling for their own captain's trickery.
"If I lose to idiots like those, I'll be too ashamed to live!" Nami vows, shaking her head as she listens to the announcer's report about the Cutie Wagon. "More terribly, we'll lose a friend!" Usopp adds as they continue to sail onward towards the hopefully close by finish.
But it isn't long before Porche and the others realize their mistake and take after the Straw Hats once again, eyes glinting with the need for redemption.
"The constestants are approaching the Long Bamboo shore. The finish is just ahead!"
"It's true!" Nami cries. "I can see it!"
"They're catching up!" Usopp shouts, flicking anxious glances over his shoulder at the rapidly gaining Cutie Wagon. "We won't be able to beat them in speed," Robin adds. Suddenly Nami gets an idea, pointing towards the shore.
"Usopp, see that?" she asks, and he follows her jabbing finger to a single bamboo stalk that looks slightly weaker than the others. Though how she can tell that, he has no idea. "Can you hit that bamboo tree?!"
"Bamboo....?"
He pulls out his ever-present slingshot and quickly loads one of his exploding stars. He aims, and fires at the indicated stalk. "Like that?" he asks, turning back to Nami.
"Yes! Shoot more!"
And Usopp does just that, bombarding the poor stalk with enough fire power to knock out Zoro (most likely an extreme exaggeration...) There's a startling crack! And then the previously assaulted bamboo tree topples over, barring the Cutie Wagon from continuing on.
"Yes~~~~! Bingo!!!" Nami sings, smiling at the wreckage behind her. She's very devious for a simple navigator. But amazingly clever for one that chooses to sail with the Straw Hat crew.
But Porche refuses to give up, using her "Cutie Baton" to throw razor-sharp flowers at the already battered Straw Hats. Thinking quickly, Robin pulls up the back of the boat, shielding its tiny crew from the brunt of the would-be devastating blow. And once it passes, it seems like smooth sailing for the Straw Hats....
Or not.
"This is bad!" Usopp cries. "She punched holes in the ship!"
"It's fine, we can make it!" Nami shouts back. "Look, the finish line is right there!!"
It's the real goal this time, Nami's sure of it. She can see the crowd of Foxy Pirates on the shore, waiting with bated breath for the winner to be decided. And somewhere in that crowd sits her beloved crew, though the only one she can see is Raya, smiling and waving at them to hurry up. For a Devil Fruit user, she shows no fear of the water, stepping right up to the very edge of the shore, practically hanging over the edge in her effort to catch sight of the bedraggled crew.
"This is it. The Davy Back Fight Round 1, 'The Donut Race' is about to end!"
Raya keeps smiling, keeps waving, urging them to move. But something about her movements becomes frantic as her eyes slide to a figure dashing along the shoreline, faster than any human she knows could manage. Foxy, she thinks bitterly, suddenly kicking off from her perch at the finish line and sprinting towards the Silver Fox, just knowing he's up to something unsavory.
Her eyes widen, and everything seems to slow down, as she watches Foxy pinch his fingers together, drawing up beside the advancing Straw Hats. She can vaguely hear her nakama cheering in the background among the chorus of boos from the Foxy Pirates, but her stomach twists uncomfortably at the thought. They adamantly believe Nami, Robin and Usopp are going to win. But Raya...
"Here they coooooommmmme! Who will cross the finish line first?!"
"Hey you three!" Foxy shouts, looking down at the Barrel Tiger's crew. "You three are pretty tough!!"
"It's him again," Nami says uneasily, looking at him from the corner of her eye.
"Too bad, you guys came close," a Foxy pirate comments from where he stands on land.
"Huh? We're going to win!"
"Hahahahaha! No you're not! Our Boss here is! Boss is like you.... He's also got a Devil Fruit power."
And Raya draws Honoo too late...
"Slow-Slow Beeeeeeaaaaaaaaam!!" Foxy shouts, producing a strange beam from his pinched fingers that flows over the unsuspecting Straw Hats....
Oh shit! Raya thinks, eyes widening in horror.
Raya's POV
"The winner is.... CUTIE WAGON!!"
I'm going to be sick, and I'm going to lose the fantastic lunch Sanji made us. And I have a feeling it's not gonna taste as great the second time around.
I drop to my knees on the shore, just in front of the Barrel Tiger crew, who are slowly drifting forward after their devastating loss. The Cutie Wagon is being greeted by cheers and whoops and hollers, while they get anxious, frustrated stares from the rest of the Straw Hats.
"Are you guys alright?" I ask, leaning forward to see them better. All three of them are panting, and I can only hope nothing about that beam hurt them. But just what the hell was that? A Devil Fruit power, that's what the pirate said... And he said... "Slow-Slow Beam", right?
"Hey, what happened to you?" Luffy calls down.
"Fehfehfehfehfeh!" Foxy laughs, spreading his arms dramatically as he addresses my crew. "It's tiiiimmmmme for you to say goodbye to one of your friends!!"
"Wait!" Sanji exclaims, turning around to the large grouping of Foxy pirates behind him. "Somebody tell me what happened back there! We were about to take the win..."
"Yeah, you were 'about to' win, but you didn't!" he laughs, right in Sanji's face. Ignoring the ignorant bastard, Sanji swings back around to look at Nami.
"Nami-chan...?" he asks.
"Hey! Usopp, Nami, Chopper! What happened?"
"Are you ok?!"
"....What was that?"
"We... really lost....?"
"We came to welcome you back," Sanji says, "but then you stopped moving... And they passed you!"
"Hm," Nami says, staring at the water, looking deep in thought. "We thought we were going to win, too... But after that beam hit us, I couldn't move my body... No, actually, we could move, but everything was going very, very slowly. The boat... the wave too...."
Sanji and Luffy help pull the despairing crew members up onto dry land, casting aside the barely-stable Barrel Tiger. Usopp sighs as he pulls his feet together, resting his hands on his ankles. "Yeah, when we recovered, the enemy had already won..." he says.
"Any injuries?" Chopper asks.
"What did he do?!" Luffy demands of the jubilant crew of the Foxy Pirates.
"Fehfehfehfeh!" Foxy laughs, striding towards us. I growl as he nears, gripping Honoo tightly, ready to spill blood as recompence. "That was too easy. Thanks to my Slow Slow Photons."
"What the bleeep did you do, you asshole?!" I shout, climbing to my feet with Honoo half-removed from her carefully crafted sheath.
"Slow Slow Photon?" Robin echoes curiously.
Foxy makes the same hand gesture as before: Thumb, ring and middle fingers pressed together with the other two pointing straight up. A small ball of purple light grows from where his fingers touch. "It is an atom that was not yet disocered by scientists," he says, in a secretive tone that doens' do the situation justice. "Anything from life-forms to liquid and air hit by its radiation... will not lose any energy, but.... its physical velocity will decrease dramatically!!"
"What kinda crap are you talking about, you stupid Split-head?!" Luffy shouts. My eyes widen involuntarily as Foxy's confident demeanor slips, and he falls to his hands and knees, looking as disheartened as the Fang Frog Pirateswe passed what seems like so long ago.
"He called me Split-head..." he sobs.
"Poor Boss!" Porche cries, placing a hand on his back. But just as quickly as he changed, he changes back.
"A thing like that isn't possible," Nami says, but is cut off by Foxy.
"Not possible?!" he mocks. "Haven't you learned by now that anything is possible in the great seas?! Anyway," he goes on, crossing his arms across his sickeningly bare chest. "Anything it hits will slow down. That is the Slow Slow Photon!!"
"Oh, why didn't you just say that earlier, Split-head?" Luffy asks blankly.
I believe Foxy choices to ignore this comment.
"Hah! After eating the Slow-Slow Fruit, I gained the power to emit these photons and I became the almight Slow-Slow Man! Behold! I shall demonstrate my power! Hamburg!"
"Ok!"
The monkey, ape... thing, hefts a mighty-looking gun onto his shoulder, and fires at his Boss. But Foxy simply sends out his waves of Slow-Slow... whatevers.... and the cannonball that's just been shot slows to a miniscule crawl in the air.
My jaw drops.
"Eh?!" Usopp gasps. "The cannonball stopped in mid air?!"
"Fehfehfehfeh! Anything hit by the beam will slow down dramatically," Foxy continues. Absently, I count in my head, waiting for the ball to speed up again. It has to. Unless he's got tow different beams: One for slowness that wears off, and one a little more permanent. But...
"Most humans are ignorant of the world of the sea," Foxy says, batting at the cannonball like a kitten with yarn. "The effect lasts around thirty seconds"--my counting was pointless then--"before the object resumes its movement. With this nothing is a threat to me!"
The whole crew goes wide-eyed as the imaginary clock ticks down.... three.... two....
"Do you doubt your eyes?!" Foxy demands, looking at our stupified expression. "I--"
The cannonball blasts into him, sending him flying some ways away, as his crew shouts out in concern for him.
Really? Why would they enjoy working for such an unstable man...? Not to mention his incredibly low self-esteem...
"Damn, so that's why we lost," Usopp mutters.
"That's a really dirty trick to use in a race!" Sanji adds. "No wonder those bastards were so confident... His power clinched the match for them."
"All that matters is crossing the finish line!" Porche informs us smugly. "We did it first, so you lost! No excuses!"
"That's right! The victor of round one.... is my teams!!" Foxy shouts, appearing out of nowhere, startling me half to death. Ugh, he looks even uglier than before...
We gather again at the stage we started this whole mess at, and Zoro joins us. I don't know where the hell he was. Probably drinking with his new best friends.... Tch. I can't believe I was the only one who wasn't bought out. That's seriously depressing.
"The first match has officially ended. Now it's time for the highly anticipated crew selection! The captain of the winning team will choose a crew member from the losing team. Please proceed Boss!"
"Damn it," Sanji curses. I clench my fists, staring at the ground. That is, until I hear the sound of someone guzzling sake.
"Damn it Zoro!" I snarl, throwing my fist into his back hard enough that he drops the bottle he's holding. It shatters against the ground. "You can at least pay attention! Damn you and your need for alcoholic consumption!"
He calmly dusts the shards of glass from his clothes and turns to face me. "How drunk are you, Swordsman?" I demand, stepping up so that we're almost nose to nose. "I can't believe this doesn't worry you!"
"The first one I will take is.... you!"
Everyone tenses around me, even Zoro. There's no hint of glass in his gaze as he bares his teeth in a snarl, aimed over my shoulder.
Oh holy shit no...
I slowly turn around, my heart kicking faster and faster and faster... until it feels like it's going to leap from chest and continue running marathons until it dies of exhaustion.
He.... he's pointing.... at.....
"The Red-Haired Demon.... Flynn D. Raya!!"
Me...