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I go to work the next day. It actually feels good, because, believe it or not, I missed working. Besides, it's a good distraction.
There are some changes inside the bar. It's more ... friendly looking now and there are more people in it. I'm surprised I still have a job here. I thought from missing work so much, I'd get already fired by now.
Especially when I know who the boss is.
Another change there is, I'm not working with Aaron, nor with Gloria, but with a different girl – Emma. She was working here before, but I never got a shift with her. She's really young and pretty and nice and I completely adore her.
She's also a bit shy and on the quiet side, but that doesn't bother me.
In the middle of the day, when I'm serving an older couple, I feel his presence. I feel my skin tingle and my heartbeat go faster. I don't turn around, though.
I place the drinks calmly on the table, even though my hands are slightly shaking, keeping the smile on my face.
I take a deep breath and get the nerves to turn around. And when I do, there's an angry Braden staring right at me by the counter.
I don't know how it's still possible, but his presence – the sight of all his glory still throws me off guard. It should be impossible to be that good looking. Totally inhuman.
I walk to the counter as nonchalant as I possibly can in this state, trying to ignore him while every nerve in my body stands up in attention and every atom in my body is pulling me towards him.
When I try to walk by him, he grabs my arm in his strong grip. ''Rory,'' he says quietly, but his tone is stone cold and dangerous.
I close my eyes at hearing his voice and feeling his touch. God, I miss him so much ... I can't get through this, not when being so close to him.
I put a cold mask on my face and look at him. ''What do you want?'' I spit out, not hiding my annoyance with him.
His eyes drink me in greedily and my body catches a fire.
''What in the bloody hell do you think you're doing?'' he grits out, tightening his grip on me.
I angrily pull my arm away from his grip and step away from him, raising my eyebrows at him. ''I'm working. What does it look like I'm doing?'' I say like it's the most obvious thing in the world.
His lips thin in annoyance and he places his hands in the pockets. We're making a scene, but I don't give two shits about it, really. ''I can clearly see that,'' he remarks sarcastically. ''My question is – why are you working?''
I draw my eyebrows together and stare at him, wondering if he's joking right know. When his expression remains the same, I laugh dryly. ''I don't know, Braden, maybe to earn money so I can survive?'' I shoot out sarcastically.
I can't help but be snappy with him. If I'm not, I'm going to break down in front of him and beg him to take me back.
But I'm stronger now. I'm not fighting for myself only, I'm fighting for my little thing growing in me and my child doesn't need a man who doesn't love him at least half as much as I already love him.
Braden puffs out the air from his mouth, pinching his nose. ''You're pregnant, for god's sake,'' he spits every word out, sounding really hateful.
I narrow my eyes at him and step another step back. ''Wow, I'm glad you noticed,'' I reply, my voice full of sarcasm.
Braden ignores me. ''You shouldn't work,'' he tries again, this time more gentle. ''You should be home, resting.''
I can barely resist not to lose it right in front of the full bar. I want to throw something in his head right now. Truly. ''Oh, you bastard,'' I whisper out. ''You almost flew out of the window when I told you about my pregnancy and now you're suddenly concerned about my child.'' I'm shaking my head at him.
His eyes slightly widen. ''Our child. It's our child growing inside of your body, Rory,'' he says slowly, making me understand every word very clearly.
I hold up one finger in front of his face in warning. ''No, Braden, it's my child. You lost the right to this child the moment you said you don't want him and left us. So don't you dare come here with all this our child bullshit now, because, guess what? Too little, too late.''
I can clearly see a flash of pain in Braden's eyes, but in my complete rage of anger, I ignore it completely. I only focus on evening out my breathing.
Braden only stands in front of me for long moments, staring into my eyes. It hurts to look at him, but I don't give in. ''Come out on a dinner with me tonight,'' he says, completely surprising me.
I look at him as if he completely lost it. ''Are you for real right now?'' I ask him, not hiding my growing anger. I level him with my gaze, but he doesn't back down. He even lifts his head up higher. I smile a fake, huge smile, filled with sarcasm. ''What game are you playing now, Braden?'' I ask him tiredly.
He steps closer to me and he lifts his hand up, nearing it to my cheek, but I back away from him again. He doesn't have the right to touch me again and I'm not prepared to feel his gentle touch again.
''I'm not playing any games anymore, Rory,'' he says gently.
Anymore. The word screams in my head, a headache making itself presentable. I shake my head at him. ''You can't just end up things between us, wishing to never see me again, and then a month after that, come search for me and ask me out for a dinner. Things don't go that way, Braden. If we ended things, we ended them for good.''
I don't even believe my words and when I see Braden close his eyes and inhale sharply, I see he's in a delusional, too. This springs a hope in me, but I quickly push it down. I'm not giving in, no way in hell. I'm not going to be treated like that again.
Braden takes a step closer again, cornering me against the counter. ''Rory, please,'' he whispers brokenly. ''I want to take you out to a dinner. Please let me.''
I shake my head stubbornly and tighten my lips. ''No.''
Braden's suddenly in front of me. He has his hands on my hips, his whole body is touching mine and his face is inches away from mine. I feel his breath on my face and I stop breathing because I don't want to inhale his familiar scent. It makes me homesick.
''I know you haven't forgotten this,'' he whispers so close to my lips that if I moved even a millimetre, they would touch. ''Don't play that hard to get now with me, because we both know that I can have you in minutes – spread beneath me, panting and pleading.''
My hormones get wild and it's even worse now when I'm pregnant. I want to literally jump his bones in the middle of the bar with everyone watching.
But thank god, I still have some sense in me and I put my hands on his chest. I ignore how good it feels to be touching him again and after a slight hesitation where I just rest my hands on his hard chest, feeling him, I push him away from me as hard as I can.
Braden, not prepared for my movement, stumbles back. Now it's me going to him and coming to his face. ''Think again, Braden Campbell. Think again,'' I say to his face. ''You already had me and you lost me. You don't get a second chance with me. When we're done, we're done. Don't try to come back into my life anymore, you'll only throw your precious time away. Enjoy your free, carefree life and I really wish you all best, but leave me alone to enjoy mine.''
I don't give him a chance to respond because I angrily walk away from him to the counter and just start wiping the glasses to busy myself and so that I don't have to look at him. I know I left him stunned and speechless, but I don't care. He hurt me and I want him to hurt, too.
***
When I come home, all tired and annoyed with everything, I see my parents sitting on the couch and my step falters.
''Mum? Dad?'' I ask in surprise.
Jesus, how many surprises will I get today?
My mum is the first to stand up and rush to me. ''Oh, thank the lord,'' she says, her bright eyes taking in every inch of me before she tightly pulls me into a hug.
I reluctantly wrap my arms around her and look at my dad watching us. I see he has his lips in a straight line and he doesn't look very happy. Uh-oh.
My mum takes my face in her hands. ''Where's your damn phone?'' she scolds me suddenly.
I sigh. I should expect this. I feel bad now for not calling my parents. I let the darkness swallow me up and I locked myself in my room, enjoying the silence and tormenting myself.
''I lost it,'' I lie, because I don't know what else to say. I can't tell them the truth, not yet.
My mum frowns. ''We thought something happened to you!'' she exclaims, making me sigh.
I catch myself so I don't roll my eyes at her protectiveness. ''It's fine mum – I'm fine,'' I try to reassure her.
She looks me up and down and narrows her eyes. ''Have you lost weight? You look thinner. Rory, baby, are you not eating well?'' mum asks with her concerned motherly voice.
The phone ringing saves me from answering her. I realise it's actually my phone ringing and I go get it, looking at who's calling.
Braden's name is showing on the screen. I stare down at the screen for long seconds, feeling my heart falling down on the ground.
I decline his call.
But he calls again. And I decline it again.
And, damn him, he calls me again.
I put the phone on silent this time and let the call go unanswered. I'm not in the mood to deal with him – not now, not ever. I can't bear to let him in my life right now and hurt me again. Whatever his motives are for coming to me again, I don't want to know about them.
We both said what we wanted to a month ago and it's too late now to take back the words. He knows how I feel about him and if he can't accept that ...
Besides, there's not even a small chance anymore I'd go back to him (if he even wanted it, which I doubt). I won't make the same mistake twice and I won't ever let myself repeat what I've done, being in a relationship as some kind of a game without love.
But, stupid me, I knew I'll get hurt and I still went along with it. Now I have what I have, but never again.
Me and Braden? It's over. I need to get over him, but that won't be possible if he's going to be in contact with me.
Now my phone vibrates because I get the text. I open it with my heart in my throat.
If you're not going to answer your phone, I'm coming over.
And then another:
Don't try me, Rory.
I put the phone down when an incoming call comes again and go back to my parents with a tight smile on my lips, hugging myself with my arms.
I hate how my parents look at me and study every inch of my body and every move I make. I know they're trying to figure it out why I haven't called them or went to visit them for three weeks straight. I've never gone without talking with them for so long, but in my state, I couldn't bear to talk with anyone.
I was hurting too much and I'm still not ready to tell my parents how things are standing. And the whole other truth.
But they'll need to find out soon. I'm carrying a child and I can't hide that forever.
''Please sit down,'' I tell my parents, showing them the couch. ''Do you want something to drink? Coffee? Tea?'' I offer.
''I'd like some coffee. Without sugar,'' dad says, smiling at me.
I lift my eyebrow at him. ''Since when are you drinking your coffee without sugar?''
My dad shrugs. ''My life is sweet enough without any sugar as it is.'' He laughs when my mum playfully punches him in the arm.
I shake my head at them. ''Mum?''
She only shakes her head. ''I'm good, thanks, sweetie.''
I nod and head into the kitchen, escaping their searching eyes. I know they'll talk about me when I'm gone, but that's expected. They're just ... protective like any loving parents, I guess.
When I'm almost done with preparing the coffee, there's a knock on the front door, but whoever is outside doesn't wait and I hear the door opening and closing and then loud steps.
When I hear my mum's excited, ''Braden, dear!'' from the living room, my whole body tenses up and I almost spill the hot coffee all over the kitchen.
Shit in the fuckery fuck, what is he doing here?
Oh, god. What do I do now? I can't hide in the kitchen forever, although it's very tempting.
''Rory, you have a visit!'' comes mum's voice from the living room.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I remind myself I can't do anything stupid in front of my parents because they don't know anything.
What if Braden tells them anything?
Shit, I haven't thought about that. I quickly grab the coffee and put on a tight, fake smile when I walk out to the wolves pack.
Braden's hard eyes instantly fall on me and he doesn't hide the fact that he's angry. I avoid his eyes as I hand the coffee to my dad who gratefully accepts it.
With one last breath, I straighten and face the elephant in the room. ''Hi, Braden,'' I grit out tightly, hoping my parents don't notice the growing tension between us.
Braden's mouth straighten and he comes to me. He places his hand softly on my bicep and leans in, giving me a kiss on the cheek. ''Hi, darling,'' he breathes, giving a small smile.
Darling? I search his face for my unanswered questions, but he's not looking at me. He still stands too close to me. I can feel the warmth of his hand on my arm through the layers of my clothes and my cheek is burning from feeling his lips there.
I lower my eyes on the ground to compose myself. This is all too familiar and it brings back way too many memories.
I back away from him and sit on the couch by my parents. I feel his eyes on me the entire time, but I can't return his gaze. There are too many emotions travelling through my body right now, but it all makes me very confused.
There's still the biggest question I'm asking myself – why is Braden suddenly back in my life and wants so badly to interact with me? He ended us.
''How are things going? Anything new happened while you were absent?'' mum asks, trying to make a small talk with me.
I flicker my eyes to Braden who's watching me with a challenging look. I gulp down the lump in my throat and face my mum. I shrug to appear as nonchalant as I can in this situation. ''Nothing new, really. You know my life is pretty boring.''
I hear Braden cough and I grit my teeth together, but otherwise ignore him completely. My mum notices the change, though, and she looks at Braden and me again, furrowing her eyebrows. ''I wouldn't agree with what you just said. I'm sure that young man is keeping you pretty busy.''
''Jesus, Darlene, would you stop snooping?'' my dad chimed in, saving me from answering that awkward statement.
Oh, if only she knew how busy he was keeping me. I feel the burn of Braden's stare, my every nerve in my body feels his presence, but I do the best I can to not look at him.
''It's not a crime if I want to know what's happening in my daughter's life!'' mum defends herself.
''She's turning 26 soon. Don't you think it's time to stop interfering in her life?''
I roll my eyes at them. My mum huffs in response. I know they're just bickering around. I don't think I've ever heard them really fight in my life, but it's still annoying to listen to them when they're at it sometimes.
''Are you planning anything for your birthday?'' my dad asks me now.
Ah, my birthday. I totally forgot it's my birthday soon, my 26th one. ''No, I don't think so. I don't have anything in mind.'' I don't have anything to celebrate, I don't add.
Dad only nods in response. I almost – almost forgot that Braden is still here until he comes and sits right down next to me, his legs touching mine. I swiftly scoot away from him. I think my dad notices the movement because he catches my eye, but he thankfully doesn't say anything.
But Braden doesn't give in that easily. He grabs my hand and before I can retrieve it back, he squeezes it in a tight grip. I glare at him, which he ignores.
He leans to my ear and says quietly, ''You never told me when's your birthday.'' It sounds like an accusation, but I'm not really sure.
I shrug. ''You never asked.''
I feel his exhale on the skin on my neck and I almost close my eyes at how much it tingles, but in a totally good way.
''Actually, mum,'' I say to take my mind off the impossible man sitting beside me. ''I don't think I've told you this, but my working hours have changed. I'm working normal hours now.''
I see a true, big smile on her face. She always wished I wouldn't work nights, especially at the bar, and especially because I had a habit of walking home. ''That's great news, honey!'' She claps excitedly.
I nod slowly and contemplate my next words. ''I actually plan on quitting.''
And just like that everyone falls silent. I don't need to look at Braden to know he doesn't take this well. I feel his whole body tense up beside me.
My mum gapes up. ''But where do you plan on working?'' dad asks. They don't know about what happened with Charles and that I'm really tight with money, but I'd rather starve than feel my heart break every day when being near Braden.
I shrug and sit back on the couch. ''I'll find something,'' I throw in casually.
My dad only raises his eyebrows slightly but doesn't comment.
''Well ... that's quite a surprise ...'' mum says when she recovers from her shock.
I don't say anything. I want to tell them about my pregnancy and about 'splitting up' with Braden, but I think there's enough of surprises for one day.
They'd probably be happy to have a grand baby, but I doubt they'd be ecstatic to know that the baby father left me when he found out. As if Braden heard my thoughts, he squeezes my hand, making me look at him. His eyes are burning right into my skull, but he keeps quiet.
I catch my mum nudging my dad with her leg and she nods toward us with Braden and then at the door. She thought she did it discreetly, but I know perfectly what's going on in her wicked mind of hers.
When dad puts down the empty cup, mum stands up. ''Well, darling, it was nice to see you. We won't keep you two.''
I stand up, too, hoping Braden will now release my hand, but he stands up with me. I squeeze his hand as hard as I can, but he doesn't show he felt it. He keeps his face neutral and straight as always. Of course. Emotionless man.
Mum kisses my cheek first and dad hugs me tightly. ''Come over soon, will you? And start using your phone now that I see you have it again!'' I flush at my lie being exposed.
''I will,'' I say like a scolded child.
She gives me one last kind look before they both head out, leaving me with the last person I want to face.
As soon as that door closes, I pull my hand out of Braden's tight grip and step away from him. ''Are you insane?'' I attack him immediately. ''You can't just come here and get all touchy in front of my parents!''
Braden cocks his head on the side. ''What did you want me to do? Did you want to tell them we're not together and upset them?''
''Why, yes, I did! Not that it's any of your business!'' I sputter out, too angry to think straight. Who does he even think he is? I don't even have words for how angry and hurt I am. He can't do this to me anymore. Hasn't he hurt me enough already?
''Of course it's my business!'' Braden retorts back. ''Everything concerning you is my business,'' he adds more calmly and I want to punch him in the face for being so controlled and not showing any damn emotion on his face. God! This man is infuriating.
He successfully shuts me up for a few seconds. I fall back down on the couch, defeated. ''Why are you doing this, Braden?'' I ask him tiredly.
He sits down, too, putting his elbows on his thighs and clasps his hands together. ''What am I doing?''
I want to laugh. ''This!'' I wave a hand between us. ''Coming back like nothing happened between us.''
He rakes his hand through his hair, the first signs of being distressed. ''That's why I came here actually, to invite you out on a dinner to talk about ... some things.''
I clasp my hands together in my lap and start playing with my fingers. A dinner with Braden. Isn't that how it all started? Him, inviting me out on that dinner and making a proposition I could easily decline, but being stupid, I accepted it like a fool and like I didn't already know how it was going end.
Braden sighs. ''What was that with you quitting your job? Why would you do that?''
I purse my lips and stare at him for what feels like an eternity. I decide that from this moment on, he only gets to hear the truth from me. ''Because I don't want to be around you.'' I lift my chin up higher.
He jerks back and his mouth slightly opens. ''Ouch,'' he says and I see the brief of a pain crossing over his face. ''That hurt.''
I shrug unapologetically. ''Not more than your words did,'' I shoot right back.
He stands up abruptly, turning away from me. He shoves both of his hands in his hair. ''Rory, I ...'' I can hear the desperation in his voice. ''Is an hour and a half enough time for you to get ready?'' he asks me finally, facing me. I see he's fighting a battle with himself.
''Ready for what?'' I ask him dumbfounded.
''You're dining with me tonight,'' he simply replies.
''I'm not sure that's a good idea,'' I manage to mumble.
''It's a very good idea, Rory,'' Braden disagrees.
I don't say anything in return. He stares at me for some long moments, before he walks toward the door. I stand up in confusion.
''I'll send a car to pick you up.'' He casts me one last glance. ''And don't you dare to play any games on me, Rory, because god so help me I'll come to you and carry you with my own hands.''
He loudly shuts the door as he walks out.