Kate Rojas
I got off early from work today. Sinadya kong umuwi ng maaga because I planned to drop by at the grocery store to get the ingredients for Ravioli. Magluluto kasi ako ngayon to serve it for dinner.
I was wearing sunglasses and a scarf on my head para hindi ako makilala. But I felt like I was drawing more attention dahil sa suot ko. People probably think I was crazy to wear sunglasses indoor and a scarf kahit mainit naman sa labas.
Binilisan ko nalang ang pagkuha ng mga kailangan ko saka nagbayad na sa cashier. I was carrying my grocery bags palabas ng grocery store when someone bumped into me, literally.
"Sorry, miss."
"It's fine," sabi ko sa lalake at akmang aalis na nung tinawag niya ako sa pangalan ko.
"Mrs. Kate Ferragni."
Natigilan ako saka hinarap siya ng nakakunot ang noo. "Yes?" takang tanong ko. "How did you know me?"
I did not realize that my answer was enough hint for him para kunin ang camera na dala niya and took a picture of me. I gasped and covered my face even more with a scarf. I quickly walked away from the man, but I could hear that he was following me. Mas lalo kong binilisan ang lakad ko.
I was glad that my bodyguards saw me walking so fast kaya nahulaan agad nila ang nangyayari, and they quickly went to the man to stop him. May isang bodyguard na lumapit sa akin to assist me papunta sa kotse. Kinuha niya ang mga dala kong bags at pinapasok niya ako sa kotse.
Nakahinga lang ako ng maluwag nung nakasarado na ang kotse. Inalis ko ang suot kong sunglasses and scarf saka napasandal sa upuan nitong kotse ko.
"It's crazy. Akala ko tumigil na sila ng kakasunod sa akin," napapailing na sabi ko.
Natawa si Kuya Cris habang nagmamaneho, "Palagay ko ay matagal pa bago sila tumigil, Maam. Kung nakikita niyo lang na ang dami niyo ng stolen pictures sa internet. Lagi pala silang nakasunod sa inyo kahit saan. Interesado sila kung ano ang ginagawa niyo araw-araw. Sabi nga ng anak ko noong isang araw na nakausap ko siya, nabasa niya raw sa isang news na hindi pa kayo nakikitang magkasama ni Sir Nicko. Parang nakaabang ang buong mundo sa love story ninyo ni Sir Nicko."
Nagulat ako sa narinig ko. Hindi ako masyadong tumitingin online ng mga balita lalo na kapag hindi naman related sa economy or sa business kaya wala akong alam sa mga kumakalat na mga balita tungkol sa akin. So, they were stalking me everyday na hindi ako aware?
It's creepy. Next time, I would not hesitate to bring the bodyguards with me lalo na kapag nasa labas ako. These paparazzis scare the heck out of me.
"The price I have to pay for impulsively marrying a popular Italian billionaire," napapailing na sabi ko.
Pagdating sa bahay ay nagpalit ako agad ng damit at pumunta sa kitchen. I put an apron before I started making Ravioli. To be honest, this was the first time I cooked in the kitchen since I moved here. I was always busy that I did not have time to cook. And besides, the house maids were always there to make me food.
I missed the feeling na nagluluto. I really enjoyed cooking and baking simula noon. Being in the kitchen made me feel so happy, especially if I would be making food.
"Ang bango-bango naman po, Maam."
Napangiti ako. "Thank you."
"Mukhang sanay na sanay kayo sa kusina, Maam. Ang galing niyo po eh. Ang sarap niyong panuorin habang nagluluto."
"Sanay kasi talaga ako sa kusina. Noong karenderya palang ang meron kami, ako na ang nagluluto. Minsan tinutulungan ako nina nanay at ng mga kapatid ko." I turned off the stove after I finished making the sauce. "Tikman mo. Let me know if masarap ba o kulang pa ang lasa."
I grabbed a spoon and filled it with the sauce saka sinubo sa kasambahay. She gladly tasted it and gave me two thumbs up. "Sobrang sarap, Maam! Hindi ako mahilig sa Italian food pero iba itong gawa ninyo. Nako, siguradong magugustuhan ito ni Sir!"
Napangiti ako sa kanya. "Sana nga," sabi ko saka nilagay na sa container ang sauce. I would mix it later with the pasta kapag malapit nang kumain para hindi saggy.
When dinner came, I waited for Nicko to come home. I stayed in the kitchen for hours and talked to the maids habang hinihintay siya. It was about nine in the evening when he came.
Sinalubong ko siya pagpasok niya sa pinto.
"Hi, Nicko."
Medyo nagulat siya nung nakita ako. He probably did not expect me to welcome him home.
"Kumain ka na? Come on, let's eat."
I felt weird about this. First time ko siyang yayain kumain. Also, it was my first time waiting for him to eat. My voice also sounded so friendly na nakakapanibago pakinggan kahit sa akin.
"I ate already," simpleng sagot niya habang dire-diretso lang na naglalakad papunta sa hagdan. I kept following him.
"Nagluto ako ng Ravioli. Your mom said that it's your favorite," sabi ko na kinatigil niya pero mabilis lang iyon dahil napalitan agad ang gulat niya ng seryosong mukha.
"I said I ate already. I will go to bed now," seryosong sabi niya saka nauna nang naglakad paakyat ng hagdan.
Napakunot ang noo ko habang nakatingin sa kanya palayo.
Ayaw niya kaya tikman ang niluto ko? But he looked surprise when I mentioned his favorite food. I think he was just avoiding me because he was still upset.
Napailing nalang ako saka pumunta sa kitchen at sinabihan ang maids na itago nalang ang niluto ko and serve it tomorrow for breakfast.
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I woke up early the next day para i-reheat ang ginawa kong Ravioli. I wanted to do it myself kasi alam ko kung paano ito i-reheat without overcooking or destroying the contents inside. I also made some coffee for me and Nicko.
When the maid told me that Nicko was already in the dining room, I carried the tray saka pumunta sa kanya.
"Good morning, Nicko."
I placed the coffee in front of him first before I served the Ravioli.
"I had to reheat the Ravioli again para masarap pa rin siya kainin. I made it according to how you like it. Iyon kasi ang sabi ng mommy mo."
Napakunot ang noo niya at sinabing, "Pasta for breakfast? This is too heavy for a first meal of the day."
Natigilan ako dahil sa sinabi niya, but I replied after a few seconds. "Hindi mo kasi kinain kagabi kaya sinerve ko ulit ngayon. It might not be good kapag pinatagal pa nating kainin."
Umiling siya. "I can't eat that for breakfast," sabi niya saka inutusan ang maid na magdala ng soup and egg, his usual breakfast.
My brows furrowed. "You should at least taste it," tampong sabi ko.
He sighed and put his utensils down to look at me. "Look, if you are trying to bribe me with food for me to forgive you, you are doing it wrong."
"Why is it wrong? It is your favorite."
"Do you think a simple pasta could cover up what you ruined?" kunot-noong tanong niya.
"I know it cannot kaya nga humihingi ako ng sorry dahil sa ginawa ko. Why is it so difficult for you to forgive me?"
He chuckled sarcastically and said, "Do you think it is that easy to forgive you after you let me down?"
"Your parents forgave me easily. Why can't you do the same thing?" kunot-noong tanong ko.
It was so difficult to please this man. How could I make this marriage work if asking for forgiveness was already so difficult? I haven't even started working on this marriage but it already seemed hopeless.
He looked at me intently for a few minutes before he said, "You don't realize how much hurt you did to me, do you?"
"I know that's why I said sorry—"
"No, you don't know," putol niya na kinatahimik ko. He sounded mad at halata na pinipigilan niya lang na magtaas ng boses. "You don't know how the dinner went because you were not there. If you only saw how it broke my heart seeing my parents felt bad. You don't know how much I sacrificed just to be in that dinner!"
Napapisik ako sa gulat when the tone of his voice changed. He was looking at me as if I did something horrible to him.
"The boards are questioning my leadership just because I chose to let go of an important deal! I could not even tell them that I had to be with my wife because you were not with me in the first place!"
Napakunot ang noo ko. Parang ako ang sinisisi niya. May mali nga ako pero bakit parang ang laki ng kasalanan na ginawa ko?
"You should have told them that you were with your parents. I don't think they will question that. They're your family."
"You think I did not tell them that?" he said sarcastically. "They did not buy that excuse." Nicko shook his head. "Now, I have to spend days, weeks or even months trying to win them again or get that million dollar deal. I was ready to risk the deal just for my mom to have a dinner with you. It would have been tolerable if you came. The fact that I lost the deal for nothing is more frustrating."
"So, it is all about business for you. That's what it is all about." Napailing ako. "You cannot forgive me because you lost a deal. You are blaming me because of it."
I looked at him with fierce eyes.
"Did I not tell you na huwag mong i-cancel ang meeting na 'yon and that I could meet your parents without you? I told you that, but you still insisted that you would cancel it. So don't blame me entirely kasi may kasalanan ka rin kaya nangyayari iyan sa business mo!"
I removed the table napkin from my lap and harshly put it on the table then I stood up. Nawalan na ako ng gana kumain. I was about to walk away when he spoke, "I did not know that you can be ungrateful."
Napintig ang tenga ko dahil sa sinabi niya kaya humarap ako sa kanya.
"What??"
He stood up and said, "You are ungrateful. You are getting all those attention from the public since you became a Ferragni and this is how you give back to us?"
"What are you trying to tell me?" kunot-noong tanong ko.
"Don't you realize that more opportunities start coming in your business since you married me? You probably forgot that your company's expansion became possible because of me? And take note, you almost lost your ownership of your business if I did not help and marry you."
Napanganga ako dahil sa sinabi niya. How dare he na isumbat sa akin 'yan?! I did not know Nicko was capable of doing this. He had been so calm and quiet in the beginning. May tinatago rin pala siyang ugali and now, I witnessed it.
"Pinapalabas mo ba na lahat ng naabot ko ngayon ay dahil sa 'yo?"
"Is it not the case?"
Hindi makapaniwala akong tumawa. "How arrogant you are! For your information, I work hard to get to where I am now. I am already successful before you even came in my life. So don't you dare slap it on my face that I made it because of you!"
"I knew you were already successful before we met. But not as successful as you are now. You barely made a headline in the past that's why I didn't even hear about your company. Now that you are getting known, you are changing and lacking any gratitude for those people who help you."
Matalim ko siyang tiningnan. Sobra na siya. "Hindi ba't pareho lang tayo, Nicko? Baka nakakalimutan mo na pumayag ka rin na magpakasal para sa negosyo mo? So, hindi lang ako ang manggagamit. Ikaw din naman. You are using me for your business, too!"
I saw the maid came in at dala niya ang pagkain but after seeing us fighting, she stepped back and returned to the kitchen.
"Yes, you are right. We are just using each other. But between the two of us, you are the one who is benefiting the most in this marriage deal and yet you act like you are the one struggling and even keep on complaining."
Napasinghap ako. "Because I have something to complain of! Do you think marrying you is such a privilege?! I have to disguise whenever I get out in public because the media keeps following me. You know how scary it is to be your wife?? They would hide just to follow and get a scoop of me. It's creepy. I was never scared for my life until I married an arrogant Italian businessman like you!" sabi ko saka diniin ang daliri ko sa dibdib niya. Galit na galit ko siyang tiningnan.
"I am not arrogant! You triggered me to be like this!"
He also gave me the same look. Galit din siyang nakatingin sa akin and only God knows what was going on in his head. I did not bother to care.
I was breathing so heavily. I shook my head and said, "I did not know na madami ka na pa lang iniisip tungkol sa akin. Kung ganyan pala kababa ang tingin mo sa akin, it is better if we just end this stupid marriage that shouldn't have happened in the first place. I do not want to live with someone na oportunista ang tingin sa akin. It is already tiring being your wife."
I turned around to leave. Hindi ko na kayang makipagtalo pa sa kanya. The more I argue with him, the more na dumadami ang nalalaman ko tungkol sa kung ano ang iniisip niya sa akin, and it hurts me a lot.
After all the hurtful exchanged of words we told each other, I did not wish to see him again, not at all.
I remembered one last thing to tell him, so I stopped on my track and spoke without bothering to face him, "I will be leaving for Singapore tomorrow. Ihanda mo nalang ang annulment papers natin. If you will need my signature, I will willingly sign it when I come back."
Those were the last words I uttered before I walked away from him.
Miss Kae @KaeJune
28 October 2022 (revised)
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Ang sipag ko mag-update lately 'no? Sana kayo rin masipag mag-comment hehe 🤭 You are welcome! 😋