The sun rose slowly, basking the kitchen in a soft orange and casting long shadows of anything that stood in its path. In the corner of the kitchen, seated on a wooden dining chair, he watched the sun with mild interest.
Once it had fully risen, he leant back against the chair and began drumming his fingers against the table waiting for his sister. Despite never having a single drumming lesson, he kept the rhythm continuous. He didn’t want to practice drumming since he thought that creating loud noises wasn’t needed. All he needed to satisfy his musical needs was his two index fingers.
To him it was one of the rare situations where everyone wins; his family won’t get upset or angry by the noises of when he practices and he won’t have to ever need to gather some courage in asking his father for some money to purchase the kit.
“Lizzie, if you’re not down in the next two minutes, I’m leaving without you!” He shouted, still continuing the pace of his fingers. Even though he didn’t get a reply, he knew she heard him but doubted that she would hurry up.
Lizzie ran down the stairs before jumping the last four and landing in a crouch position. She looked up and shouted to the kitchen, “You all ready to go my big bro?”
“More than a forty year old virgin,” John replied and walked towards her.
“Don’t say that,” she made a face. “I’m your innocent baby sister for the love of cherubs.”
“You lost the title of being innocent when I caught you reading Fifty Shades of Grey in your room,” John replied picking up his bag and leaving the house followed shortly by Lizzie.
“I didn’t even read half of it!” she laughed making John stop walking and raise an eyebrow at her. “Whatever, you should always finish a book no matter how disturbing it is. It’s like you’re with someone and going through the same struggles as them so you become their friend and if you stop reading the book then you’re just abandoning a friend which-”
John slapped the back of her head making her stop midsentence. “If you don’t stop with that crap then I’m just going to sit on you again,” he smirked and walked out the front door with Lizzie following, rubbing her head gently.
* * * *
Lizzie ran down the hallways, pushing anyone and everyone away from her not caring about the shouts of protest and discontent. “Faster you moron, they’re going to die!” a girl behind Lizzie started pushing her back making their speed increase.
The pair threw themselves through the double green doors leading to the cafeteria; the line of babbling teenagers stretched from the food counter to the back of the room where Lizzie and her friend stood. Lizzie heard a sigh of annoyance beside her as her companion took in her busy surroundings.
“Quickly,” Lizzie whispered after scanning the room. They picked up a tray and walked towards a small timid girl standing by herself. “Hello,” Lizzie smiled sweetly as she pushed Penny behind her.
“Hi,” the girl glanced at Lizzie before returning her gaze back to the floor.
“What’s your name?” Lizzie asked.
“Sierra,” the girl’s pale face slowly began to redden.
“I’m Lizzie and this is Penny,” she indicated to the bespectacled brunette girl standing behind her. “This is going to sound extremely rude but can we cut in front of you?” The girl looked up from the floor and met Lizzie’s grey eyes. “It’s just that Penny has a huge phobia of potatoes so I’m trying to help her overcome her fear. I thought that I should start of small with something like chips and then work my way up to mashed potatoes and eventually getting her to have a bath with whole potatoes,” Lizzie smiled at her.
Sierra looked at Lizzie to Penny and back to Lizzie before answering in a small defeated voice, “I don’t mind.”
“Thank you!” Lizzie immediately hugged the girl catching her in surprise. She released her and joined the queue for chips in front of Sierra with her friend.
“You’re such a snake,” Penny laughed quietly making sure the girl behind couldn’t hear.
“I didn’t want to wait in line,” Lizzie shrugged. “And John’s been teaching me how to get people to do what you want. I needed to practice it and this girl didn’t seem that hard to convince.”
“A phobia of potatoes,” Penny shook her head, smiling. “You’re the biggest bullshitter that I have ever met.”
Lizzie and Penny inhaled their food before taking off running once again; they ran down the stairs taking two at a time until they reached the basement. The air was heavy with the smell of mothballs and pungent cleaning supplies. In less than five minutes, Penny had picked the lock with a hair slide and they were both searching in the dark corners of the room for the spiders.
“Do you think that they’ve already been here and killed them?” Penny asked tearing her gaze away from a broken spider web.
“I’m going to put a damn tarantula down their throat if they-”
“Found them!” Penny squealed and Lizzie ran to join her friend.
They observed the several spiders standing idly, none of them looked harmed to the relief of the two girls. Lizzie took a large jar from her bag and released its contents next to the spiders.
“Food shortage?” Penny asked indicating to the lack of insects that Lizzie had collected for them.
“My dad won’t let me get any more insects,” she sighed. “But don’t you worry my pretties, you will soon be released into the wild,” Lizzie cooed the spiders.
“Double Z, do you know what they are yet?” Penny asked, leaning against the wall. “Black widows?”
“Close but no cigar, Double N. They’re called False Widows but I don’t think that they’re as poisonous as a Black Widow. Guess we’ll find out soon enough,” Lizzie smirked. “I’ll try and get more bugs from dad and feed them so we can do it.”
“Macy-Lea is going to scream,” Penny laughed and threw her head back. “Probably burn her Gucci bag after when she sees that these amazing guys have been in there.”
* * * *
Lizzie lay on the floor in her front room, flicking through the channels looking for something mildly entertaining to watch. Every so often, she would glance towards the front door waiting to see either her brother or father walk through.
“Lizzie?” At the voice, Lizzie’s body tensed slightly. “Do you want something to eat?” Standing in the doorway with her dressing gown hanging off from her thin frame, her mother regarded her daughter with kind eyes. Her left eye was swollen shut and judging from her nasal voice and bloodshot right eye, Lizzie could only assume that she had been crying.
Lizzie couldn’t help the sense of awe that consumed her as she saw her mum. Despite how appearance, she still looked strong; her brown eyes still kind, her posture tall and straight and her ability to care for others no matter her state.
“I’m fine mum,” Lizzie tried to smile but grimaced slightly instead. “You go rest.”
She watched her mum retreat back up the stairs to her bedroom, her heart fell to her stomach and her head felt light. At least it isn’t as bad as the time when he hurt her neck.
John entered the house a half hour later, still in his football uniform. “Did they kill them then?” He shouted at Lizzie as he walked into the kitchen
“Nope,” Lizzie answered back proudly. “Guess your little friends are scared of an itsy bitsy baby spider.” He came back with a banana and started eating.
“You’re going to end up making Macy commit suicide if you actually do it,” he said with his mouth full of mushed banana.
“Well I did tell her that if she pushed Penny again then I would do it. She pushed her again so I am going to do it,” Lizzie’s eyes widened in excitement. “Want to watch?”
“Obviously,” he mirrored her grin as they both imagined the potential scenarios of what could happen.
“Have you seen mum today,” John asked, pulling them both out of their reverie.
“Yes,” Lizzie answered after a moment hesitation. “She doesn’t look great, a swollen eye and I think she’s been crying.”
John nodded silently and they both let the TV fill the silence, neither of them feeling in the mood to talk. Lizzie curled herself into a ball on the sofa and closed her eyes hoping that she would have fallen asleep before her father came home.
John watched his little sister fall asleep, her arms hugging herself like she was protecting herself from the world. Lizzie was starting the change from a young girl into a woman and he wanted to stop it, he wanted to freeze time and keep her as she was; innocent and uncorrupted.
John didn’t think that there was a boundary that his father wouldn’t cross and with each passing few months, as he saw his once baby sister develop, he feared that his father could end up hurting his sister mentally and emotionally but this time, he wouldn’t be able to prevent it.
“Eliza!” The front door opened and slammed shut. Dazed by waking up so suddenly, Lizzie lifted her head up from her lap and their father walked into the front room, beaming brightly at both of them. Feeling uneasy, John clenched his fists and watched his father carefully, confused by his blatant happiness.
“Lizzie Dad. My name is Lizzie,” she moaned as she rubbed her eyes with her fists.
“Look what I have,” he moved his hand from behind his back and showed Lizzie a large jar filled with live insects. Lizzie jumped up and embraced her father in a hug, thanking him profusely. Grinning, she took the jar and ran to her bedroom leaving her father and John alone in the room.
“How was school?” He asked before sitting down in his armchair, still wearing the smile that made John feel sick.
“Great,” John maintained his steady voice, keeping his gaze firmly on his father, neither of them willing to be the first to break their stare.
“Have you eaten?” He smiled before looking away from John to the TV.
“Not hungry,” John replied smoothly, his eyes never leaving his father.
“You should eat regardless,” an advert for Nutella had finished and his father looked back at John but this time, his previous smile had vanished and his eyes were empty. “You never quite know if you’re food is going to be taken away from you.”
John blinked, trying to process the sudden shift in mood.
“What I mean is,” his smile was back as was the boyish glint in his grey eyes. “We have to be grateful for our food.” John remained silent. “Well, I think I’m going to read tonight. Goodnight John,” he said before leaving the room. John sat still, listening to his father’s footsteps retreating up the stairs to his bedroom.
“Has Dad gone to bed?” Lizzie asked, taking John out from his thoughts.
“Yeah, he’s gone to read a book.” He glanced at the clock and realised that he had spaced out for twenty minutes thinking about what his father could have meant. Would he be so cruel to stop his family from eating?
“I can’t believe that he bought me that jar,” she squealed in happiness. “You didn’t see them today, they were starving and I didn’t have much to give them.”
Would he make us eat the food from our neighbours’ bins while he enjoys a warm homemade one?
Would he make us eat mouldy food that he’s kept for over two months so he can enjoy our pain of throwing our insides out into a toilet basin?
“I shouldn’t even need to bring a jar of bugs for them to eat; the basement should be full of it!” Lizzie scoffed, “trust our school to be the only one with an OCD janitor.”
Could I swipe some food from the shop around the corner? Lizzie could talk to the shop keepers and I’ll pretend that I’m browsing. I’ll buy a chocolate bar so they don’t suspect anything.
“Penny is going to freak when she sees it,” Lizzie giggled and threw her head back.
“Lizzie shut the fuck up!” Lizzie’s laugh quickly died as she looked at her brother. “It’s just a jar of stupid bugs.”
“I need them and dad gave it me,” she whispered. “It was like a present for me and-”
“So he gives you a present and you forgive him,” he hissed. “He gave you a bribe and you accepted it which means that you forgive him for hitting our mum yesterday!”
“But I don’t forgi-”
“Stop lying to me, you literally jumped on him!” he stood up and walked towards her. “You thanked him and you forgave him.”
John bent down to his sister’s face and looked into her shiny eyes but it wasn’t long before Lizzie moved her gaze towards her knees.
“What was the last thing he bought for you as a present?” John voice turned to an icy whisper. “He bought you a trampoline and what happened with that trampoline?”
Lizzie opened her mouth to reply but John cut her off again.
“You and daddy dearest were jumping on it together,” John moved his face closer to Lizzie’s so her wet eyes were the only thing he could see. “Laughing, giggling, smiling… but then he pushed you off the trampoline. It wasn’t a gentle push or an accidental one, he grabbed your left arm and pushed you off there making you break your right arm and dislocating the left.”
“John I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-” Lizzie started sobbing quietly, unable to finish her sentence.
“You were barely thirteen years old Elizabeth,” John moved away from her face and stared at his little sister taking in her whole appearance. Her face was patchy and red; her eyes that were usually smiling were now bloodshot with fresh tears already spilling over the edge; her hair which was usually pushed back now stuck to the sides of her wet face.
John walked away, outside into the cool spring weather with a blank expression, a calm heart and a mind with no regrets.
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