"It's not you Mikey, it's me."
Really? Out of all the things Javen could have said to me, he chooses this stupid line.
Does it matter to him all the things I've done for him? All the things we've been through in our ten months together? Almost a damn year!
"I just have somethings I have to settle down with in my life," he continued, running his rough hands through his non-moving gelled up dark hair. "I would hope you would understand."
I bit my lip, fighting back the nasty things I wanted to say to him. What could possibly be going wrong in Javen's life? I thought we were completely open to each other and had confidence to tell each other everything. Well, at least, I did.
Wouldn't he tell me if anything is wrong with him?
I bit back my anger and confusion and nodded at him. "Of course. I hope everything is okay with you." I placed my hand on his arm. "I'll be here is you ever want to talk you know."
A smile brightened up on his face. The same smile that I fell in love with. "Thanks, Mikey." He bent down and kissed me on the cheek before running down to his class.
The rest of my day went out pretty normal, minus the random visits from Javen.
Gina slammed her tray in front of me when it was finally lunch time, her shoulder length blond hair bouncing and blue eyes blazing. "Okay, Mikayla. I'm not a shrink or anything. I don't plan to be, but I am your best friend and I know when something is bothering you."
I put down the apple I was about to bite into and avoided eye contact. Was I really that easy to read? "Javen broke up with me."
Gina began coughing. It was easy to tell that she was probably swallowing something while listening to me. "You're joking, right?"
I shook my head. "I wish I was."
Gina shook her head. "That little son of a -"
"Gina," Alex popped up from the corner of my eye and gave Gina a small kiss. His brown hair was tousled around like always, but his crooked smile was something that made up for that.
Gina whacked him in the arm and then kissed him again. "What took you so long?"
"Science extra credit," he said before looking at me. "Hey, Mikayla. What's wrong with you?"
I rolled my eyes. I need to learn to be more in control with my facial features. "Ugh, nothing!"
"Javen broke up with her," Gina shook her head in a more comical way. "And right before summer vacation."
I started picking at my food again. "It's not that big of a deal, Gina."
Gina's eyes widened. "What do you mean it's not a big deal? It's a huge deal! We need to find you a new eye candy and soon."
"Gina. Don't you think you're going a little overboard with all this?" Alex interjected, grabbing a pretzel off her plate.
"Alex, honey, take my side with this please." Gina patted his head and returned to me. "I heard Owen always had a thing for you."
I could feel my face scrunch up. Yes, Owen was a much wanted prize to any girl in Ambrose High, but he wasn't really my type with his meaty body and obsessive drinking. "I'll pass. I'm sure there are other ways to pass the summer than with a boyfriend."
"Like?" Gina eyed me actually expecting an answer.
I kicked her under the table and she laughed.
Alex shrugged. "Get a summer job."
I nodded. "Sounds like a plan. I'm sure there are plenty of those going around now."
Alex nodded. "Yeah, the animal shelter has some openings there."
Gina groaned. "Please, please, please Mikayla. Don't work there. Alex always gets out of there smelling like wet dogs and covered in cat hair."
I laughed. "I'll think about it."
The rest of the day went by pretty quickly. The only awkward thing about it was seeing Javen in my history class. Talk about ironic.
He didn't even try to look at me. It's like whatever happened that morning never happened. It kind of bothered me that I was actually feeling sad about it. I mean, it is normal to feel sad about breaking up with a boy that you loved and it was not like we broke up on bad terms.
I just hoped that whatever was bothering him will be done soon and it wasn't just some excuse because he just didn't love me anymore.
I met Alex and Gina at the parking lot. Gina had her car taken away from her because she was caught sneaking in from a party, so we were stuck taking Alex's broken down pickup truck.
"Ready?" Gina asked as I approached.
"Yeah, let's get out of here."
Alex, Gina and I all sat squished in the little box. I usually liked to sit in the back and let the wind tousle my hair, but I felt sick already and didn't want to be pucking over the side.
Gina's house was closest from the school, so I had to get out to let her off. Alex got out too and gave her a kiss before she hugged me and went inside.
I got back inside the truck and Alex started driving to my house, needing constant directions from me.
"Turn left here," I said as we were nearing my house.
I could tell that something was bothering Alex. The whole ride to my house he was very focused. I could see the concentration in his eyes and worry lines overcoming his face. "Listen, Mikayla. Don't worry about Javen, okay?"
I looked at him, my face turning into a mirror reflection of his. "Okay?"
"I mean, you know, you're best friends with Gina and I don't want you two to have a bad summer because of a stupid guy."
I nodded. "Yeah, I know. I won't bring down Gina with me." I smiled. "I love her. She's always been there for me so I'll be happy for her. That and I definitely don't want to hook up with Owen."
Alex laughed. "Yeah, we don't want that happening."
"Right here," I broke in and Alex pulled up to my house. "Thanks for the ride," I said and grabbed my backpack.
"No problem. Feel better."
I smiled and hopped out of the car into my house.
Once inside, I decided that it was best to get rid of everything that reminded me of Javen. The football tickets, the photo by my bed and even my English notebook where Javen doodled in. Tomorrow was the last day of school, anyway.
On my way downstairs to take out the trash, I stopped myself unable to permantly dispose of all these things. I groaned and brought the bag back upstairs to the attic. I dumped it in a corner and returned to my room.
I called Gina right away. "I couldn't do it, Gina."
"Do what?" Gina asked.
"I couldn't throw away Javen's things. I know it's code rules and all, but it's my attic. Haunting me."
I could hear her sigh through the phone. "Please don't tell me you still have feelings for him, Mikayla."
"Don't kill me, Gina. It's only been a couple of hours, anyways. These things do take time."
"Whatever," she groaned. "Anyways - wanna meet up for some smoothie's tomorrow after school? You know, like an end of the year treat?"
"Sounds good. I'm sure adding some more calories to my diet is a good thing to cheer me up."
And I was right. The Smooth Stop was probably the best place to treat your sweet tooth. I was probably on my second cup by the time Gina was halfway done with her cookie. "You okay there, Mikayla?"
"Perfect," I managed to say between slurps.
Javen wasn't at school today, which was probably going to be the last day I saw him before summer. Who knows what he was doing today?
Gina raised her perfectly arched eyebrow at me. "Anyways, I might have some bad news, 'Kayla."
Great. Just what I need. "Mhmm," I said, lowering my fruit intake.
"Well, my sister just had her baby over in California and my family decided that we should go over to see the baby for a couple of weeks to help her get settled in."
"You're leaving me?" It was the only thing that I could manage to sputter out.
"Just for like two weeks or so. You'll be fine, though. Maybe you could get that summer job you brought up or something."
"Working at an animal shelter is not the way I wanted to spend my summer, Gina!"
Gina held up her hands as if to surrender. "Chill, Mikayla. Once I get back it's just going to be you and me. Beaches all day, parties all night. I promise."
It was a good thing that I had this smoothie infront of me or else I wouldn't know how to take this.
I stopped at the Saving Grace animal shelter on my way home. Once inside, I could hear the barking and the hose in the back. Probably a dog getting an unwanted bath. The cages at the entrance of the shelter all held little dogs and cats that got closer to the openings, looking at me with kind eyes. I couldn't help but feel like a pressure was lifted off my shoulders.
I got to the counter where there was an older woman doing some work on the computer. Once she saw me, she stopped and looked at me with a smile. "Hi. What can I help you with?"
"Um, I'm here for a summer job. I heard you had some available?"
Her smile fell a little. "I'm sorry. All we have right now is volunteer work. Nothing paid."
I took in a sharp breath but nodded. Working in here and not getting paid sounded way better than mourning over my breakup and absence of my best friend. "Actually, that's fine. When can I start?"
The smile returned and she handed me a small stack of papers. "Great! Just fill out these papers and we can handle out your schedule."
I smiled and sat down at one of the plastic chairs near the cages and started filling them out.
Just then a small black lab ran out from behind the counter and jumped onto my lap. I winced at the pressure and it just got worse when he began shaking his wet fur.
"Conrad!" Came a familiar voice from the back and out came Alex. He had a apron on which didn't really help much since he was just as wet as the dog. He looked at me and gave another one of his crooked smiles. "Mikayla?"
I put down my papers and grabbed onto Conrad, giving him back to Alex. "Hey, I didn't know you was here today."
He took Conrad from me and gave him to the woman who was behind the counter. She walked off to the back and began to towel dry him.
"Yeah, I'm here a lot." He looked down at my clothes which were now drenched. "Sorry about that."
I looked down at my clothes and sighed. "It's nothing. I was heading home after this, anyways."
He shook his head. "No, I can't let you leave like that. Come to the back. I think I got a sweater you can change into."
He walked to the back and I followed after him. Conrad was already dry and in his cage. The woman smiled at me and let out her hand. "I'm Abby. Don't worry about filling out those papers. I think you're suitable enough for the job."
"Thanks," I smiled, shook her hand and turned back to Alex who returned with a grey sweater.
"It's a little itchy, but it'll keep you warm." He pointed to a small room. "That's the bathroom. You can change in there."
"Even though this is completely unnecessary - thanks." I walked into the bathroom and removed my shirt and put on Alex's sweater. He was right. It was extremely itchy, but it was warm. I could smell the soap and saw dust on it. It was oddly comforting.
I exited the bathroom and met him back outside where he was taking care of another dog. When he saw me, he smiled and grabbed a paper, handing it to me. "Abby said this was your schedule."
I looked over it and nodded. "Seems great since I have nothing better to do."
"I'm guessing you heard about Gina, huh?"
I shrugged. "Yeah. She decided to break the news to me over smoothies."
"Tough," he smirked and picked up the scissors again. "I guess I'll see you Monday?"
I smiled. "Unless I run away, I guess you will."