Recap
Carter’s pointer finger tucked under my chin and tilted it so that I was looking in his face. “You’re not okay are you?”
Just like that, once again, tears were streaming down my face and I was being pulled closer to Carter. “He left Carter. He left me, but mostly he walked out on his son. How could he?” I said, while trying not to choke on my tears. “Walk out on me, but not our son.”
Carter didn't say anything, he just held me while I cried.
“How am I going to tell Beau that his father walked out on him? What do I do, Carter?” I asked, while burying my face into his chest. Though, I felt some happiness knowing that I would always have Carter to be there for me, no matter what. Not in a intimate way, but a friend way.
Carter swallowed hard, while looking straight ahead. “He will come back to you Samantha. He has too, you gave him something that no one else can. He may be out raged, and pissed but I really don’t think that will keep him from you in anyway.” He whispered.
At that moment, I was completely and utterly thankful for Carter. He knew the right things to say and he had a way of making me see things in a different way. He was right, Danny was pissed but surely he wouldn’t let it keep him away from his son.
Chapter 38
Danny
I sat up in the dark room and looked down at the naked girl that was lying so peacefully on my chest. Her long blonde hair was flowing across to the other pillow and her breathing was calm. I know I was being kind of stalkerish, but watching her made all of my other thoughts subside quickly. I mean, she’s beautiful and she was a hell of a player in bed. Both times. She had managed to take my unnerving thoughts and throw them somewhere else so I wouldn’t have to worry over them. Though, it only lasted a little while. Once she was tired of playing, she turned the other way from me and all of my thoughts of Samantha and Beau came flowing back in quickly. So finally I reached over to the girl and pulled her on to my chest. Just the way Samantha always used to lay on me after we would make love.
For some reason though, I didn't feel any remorse for doing what I had done. Samantha deserved this. She deserves to feel the exact same hurt that I am feeling. How could I possibly regret bedding this beautiful woman that was lying in my arms? I know, this wouldn’t go anywhere after the morning because I wouldn’t let it. And chances are she wouldn’t either since she practically was the one to pick me up in the bar.
She shuffled in the bed for a moment, and then looked up at me with no emotion what so ever. My thoughts suddenly went back to Samantha and the way she treated me so sweetly after making love. This woman just looked at me like I was only there for one reason. I mean, I know I was but I wanted so much more than that with someone. I tried for it and got burned in the process once again.
This time, I wouldn’t forgive Samantha though. I wouldn’t let her come barging back into my life next time. I know we both made mistakes the first time we fell for each other but this time. This time was all her. She is the only one that made the mistake here. Now, I was left with a son that I don’t know anything about. One that doesn’t know anything about his father. A son that probably resents me and everything that I am worth because I wasn’t there for him when he was younger. No wander he was looking at me so oddly the night I took Samantha out on our first date.
I closed my eyes, and pulled the woman tighter into my body. Tomorrow I would go home and pack. Then, I will move to Boston and start my life over completely with nothing holding me back. Of course, I will send her money for Beau but that’s it. Why should I be in a child’s life that doesn’t know me one bit? He probably doesn’t care to know me either.
The next morning I woke up, with a slight head and body ache. The woman that was lying next to me last night had completely worked my body out. Usually, I am the one to give no mercy but this time it was completely the other way around.
I shuffled in the bed easily, trying not to wake her up. Though, before I could leave I would have to find all of my clothing. I looked under the bed and around it but I couldn’t find it. I eased up the sheet, and my boxer briefs were tangled up at the edge of the bed with the sheets. I quickly grabbed them and slipped them on alone with the rest of my clothing.
As I walked out of the apartment building that I had stayed in last night, I looked up to the bright sun. It was beating down on my skin, but it wasn’t too hot yet. And that only let me know that it was still early in the morning. Early enough to go back to the hospital and not have to worry about getting ambushed by anyone.
I quickly drove to the hospital, and as I walked in the cold air hit me in the face. It was a lot different than walking in the hospital last night, once everyone had found out about Beau being shot the doctors and nurses were running around everywhere. The waiting rooms were filled with frantic friends and family. At this time of day, everything was calm and peaceful.
I walked up to the front desk, and the brown headed nurse looked up at me and smiled. “Hello there, how may I help you this morning?” She asked, with a cheerful voice.
“Yeah, I am here to visit Beau Smith?”
She looked at me oddly, and then looked down at her booklet that was sitting in front of her. “I am sorry Mr…I am sorry but, Beau’s condition isn’t allowing him to see any visitors other than family. All I can tell you is that, you can wait in line with everyone else.” She said.
Ill be damned to wait in line to see him like everybody else since he is my son, I thought.
I looked at her with an amused face, “I am his father.” I said, monotone. Though telling people that I had a son or referring to him as my son never got old. I liked it.
Her eyes widened, and then she looked down at her booklet again. “Mr. Bradford? Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. I will escort you to his room right away.”
I ignored her apology; honestly there wasn’t a part of me that cared. I followed her quietly as she led me to ICU. Once I entered the room, sadness flowed through my body as I glanced at my son. His small helpless arm laid over the side of the bed, with a needle poking through his vein. He looked completely still and his eyes had dark black circles around them. I walked to the side of the bed, and gently grabbed his hand. Every part of me wanted to cry for my little boy but there was no use. This would be the last time I saw him.
It was just better that way.
I ran my thumb over his soft skin, and glanced at him for a long moment before being interrupted.
“The doctor says he will be fine. He’ll just have a long recovery.” Her small, scratchy voice came from the chair that was sitting behind me a couple of feet away.
As I turned back to look at her, she sat there with her head in her hands. “He shouldn’t have even been put in this situation.” I said back to Samantha, as I looked back at my son. “A good mother would have don’t everything in her power to keep her son out of danger.”
Though when I looked over at her once again, she was standing up while nodding. “And a bad mother wouldn’t have been able to take care of him for five years alone. So, don’t sit here and criticize me, for something that you know nothing about.” I was surprised that she wasn’t crying, though her eyes looked just as black as Beau’s did from lack of sleep.
“What is there to know? You kept my son away from me for five god damned years and now you are prancing back into my life. What for? I know you don’t love me, so what do you want Samantha? Money?” Just like that her eyes watered up, and a sting from her hand crossed my face.
Her eyes burned into mine, as we were standing there fighting in front of our unconscious son. “You. I wanted you.” She said, as the tears started slowly streaming down her face. “You were right; I had no intentions of telling you. Never, I didn't want you to know about Beau after you stung me along for three months telling me you loved me and that you would be with me. And then come to find out you never really had any intentions of leaving her for me. Then, you dont marry her and you still didnt care enough to come after me? But the moment you walked back into my life, I realized that the love that I had for you never went away. Not one piece of it.”
I couldn’t help but roll my eyes at her lies. “That’s bullshit Samantha…” I spat. “You strung me along for two fucking weeks. Two fucking weeks before you made any kind of move to tell me.”
At that moment I started pacing the hospital floor, I didn't want to hear anything she had to tell me. “You know what, forget about this. I will willingly send you a check for child support every month with no expectations of seeing this child. You didn't want him to have a father, well good job Sammy. You win. Your child is fatherless.”
She looked at me, like I had just slapped her completely in the face. “I don’t want your god damn money!” She said as she moved closer to me, “Don’t you see Danny? If I had of told you when I first arrived in Martha’s Vineyard you would have don’t the same thing you are doing now. Walking out, and being a coward. Hell, for all I know if I had of told you five years ago you would have walked out on him then just like you walked out on me. I have my fucking reasons; you are just too stubborn and self-fish to listen to them.” She looked at me for the longest time, with dry eyes but they looked like they wanted to burst out in tears. “Go ahead, walk out. He has made it this far without you, I am sure he can get along without you again.”
I swallowed hard, as I looked back to Beau who was still lying there unconscious and then I looked to Samantha who was now turned facing the other direction. I am pretty sure she was just trying to hide her tears though. The tears that I don’t care anything about. She is still wrong; she still should have told me no matter what.
I gave one more soft squeeze to Beau’s hand and then kissed him gently on the forehead. I didn't bother saying anything to Samantha who was still facing the other way. I just walked out of the hospital room, with the intentions of never going back. Never seeing her face or his again.
I knowwwwwwww shitty huh? But dont hate Danny or Samantha!!!! :)
I know that its short and everything but right now i am pressed for time and i just wanted to get something out there before the weekend begins haha, i never get to right on the weekends bc of the bf!
OHHH! Dont forget to check out my new project called Bittersweet. I would love for you guys to give me some feed back on it!! comment/vote!
:) anyways. ENJOY!!
PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE comment and vote! :)