Josh was gone, he left earlier that afternoon to take care of business with Chris, their manager. The way it was going, their ongoing tour had no other choice but to be cancelled. Tyler laid back on his bed, staring at the ceiling, which still had a few remaining nocturnal stars from his childhood. He laughed at the memories and turned onto his right side where he had a clear view of his bedroom since his bed rested against the wall on the left side. His eyes wandered all over until they caught sight of a box in his closet, on the floor. He sat up and walked towards it, crouching before it and tilting his head in confusion as he observed its contents. They looked non-violent. The brown cardboard box held a bright red hat, a bottle of black body paint, and contact lenses, red contact lenses. Underneath were a few pieces of black clothing: shirts, black leggings and even old black sports shorts he remembers wearing for basketball, along with a white and red backpack which had black writing along the straps.
He grabbed the box and brought it to his bed, curiosity controlled him as he changed from his grey sweats to those black pants along with the shorts on top of them. This didn't make sense to him, he didn't know why he would wear something like such but he didn't stop, he kept on getting dress. He put on the black shirt, white backpack and red hat. He looked in the mirror, he recognized himself somehow, yet he was a complete reflection of a stranger. He placed in both contact lenses and covered his neck and hands in paint. Why? Why would he even know how to be someone he doesn't remember. He looked in the mirror and just stared, he stared at his persona which was once a huge part of him, shaking his head, he dropped the bag. A thud sounded and he looked down. A book had fallen out, a hardcover notebook, not too big, which was clearly full. He knelt down and picked it up, opening a few random pages carefully.
He saw many words, some familiar, some unrecognizable. One of which stood out most, repeatedly appearing page after page, in no significant order. Blurryface. Tyler dropped the book, he let it slip out of his hands and onto the floor. His head was pounding, he had a migraine as he felt cerebral thunder control him. He laid down and shut his eyes, he didn't see black. He saw flashes of colors, he could hear the colors burning in his skull. Soon enough, he was gone, his brain had given up and the overwhelming thoughts had put him to sleep, if only he could be resting.
Josh had just left the business building, where he had set up a meeting with Chris in order to complete the cancellation of their tour. It tore the boy apart. He had just signed his dreams away, the right to take all he'd ever work for, away from him. In a way it didn't seem to matter, he and Tyler were okay. They were going to be okay, Josh wasn't concerned with the band as much as he was for Tyler. Throughout the years, they've written and composed music, Tyler had the opportunity to deal with so much more, something much greater than his self and he overcame suicide, depression and probably half his insecurities he'd became at peace with.
It's worth it, it's worth it to keep going. I know it sounds really cliché but I mean it, I really mean it when I sit here and tell you that.
Josh had never forgotten the day Tyler sat down in front of him and told him that, when he explained the meaning he wanted to give to their album, Vessel. That album meant so much to him, it contained one very special message, and Josh will never forget it.
Heading back to Tyler's home, Josh was listening to Trees from their CD: Vessel. He smiled as he remembered the moments he sat behind those drums hitting the snare with much power, his arms slamming back down in sync with Tyler's words, with his voice. Pulling up to the familiar doorstep, he turned off his radio and headed inside where he found nothing but silence. Kelly and Chris had gone to work and Tyler, well Tyler should be here, maybe he was asleep? Josh didn't wanna worry himself, so he headed downstairs and to the boy's room, slowly pushing the door open.
He stepped inside, the room was lit and there were clothes all over the floor. Josh's jaw dropped, nearly smashing against the wooden floor and breaking into uncountable pieces as his eyes caught sight of Tyler: he was wearing his Blurryface persona, lying down on his bed with no sign of movement, no sign of life.
Josh sprinted to the other side but tripped and fell, face hitting the corner of the bed. He straightened up his back and looked at his feet, spotting a book he'd never seen before. Josh reached out to grab it and pulled the book towards him and flipped it around, exposing himself to the page's content. He was shocked, he bent his head down, closer, in order to examine the words better. He was distracted by the blood drops that appeared on the ruffled pieces of paper. With worry, he jumped up and held pressure on his forehead with his shirt, which he pulled off of him quickly and crumpled up.
Tyler flinched and Josh turned, in time to see his back arch dramatically, causing Josh to quickly drop the shirt and run to him, sitting on the edge of the bed and pulling him in. Tyler sucked in a large breath and collapsed into Josh's arms. He was panting his heart palpitating to the point where Josh wasn't sure if it was his own. When he pulled back, Tyler's eyes met Josh's and his bright red contacts lit up the room, somehow distracting Josh from everything. Tyler tilted his head, trying to ignore the fact that he was frozen, the heat which radiated from Josh's chest along with his rhythmic and soothing heartbeat calmed the boy down subconsciously.
Tyler was looking up at him, eyes big and wide, when he noticed the red and sticky substance leaking out his skin. "Josh, you're bleeding!"
His voice snapped Josh back to reality and out of his fantasy, Josh pulling away he swears he almost saw a hint of disappointment in Tyler's face. Shaking off what must have been his imagination, Josh smiled and patted his friend's back, reassuring him, "I'm fine, I just hit my head."
He looked down, realizing he was shirtless. Quickly he jumped up and onto the floor, his face flushing with embarrassment as he fiddled his fingers around the dusty floor, trying to pick up his bloody shirt. "I'm-I'm sorry, I was using it to stop the bleeding..."
Tyler stood up, walking towards him, "Don't worry, I don't mind...just umm, are you okay?" He spoke quietly at first, anxiety swimming within his tone. He picked up another shirt, half black and half white, horizontally divided, with white stars on the black top portion of the t-shirt. "Here."
Josh took the shirt and thanked him as he put it on, dropping the other bloody one onto the ground. Tyler bent down and chuckled, "Uh, you'll need that.." He picked up the shirt and pressed it against Josh's open wound, who was standing awkwardly, not sure of what Tyler remembered. "How did that happen anyway?"
"Uh, I tripped when I was running to see you, you weren't moving so I thought...well anyway, that's when I tripped on this.." Josh brushed past Tyler who spun around 180-degree angle, now facing Josh as he bent down to pick up the book from the floor. Tyler's eyes wandered a little but soon focused back on the grey notebook he held between his powerful hands.
Tyler froze at the sight, Josh had found his deepest of thoughts...the ones he struggled with, the ones he failed to remember. He looked down and snatched it from him, "Don't touch that!!"
Josh jumped back at the violence as the paint coloured hands grabbed the book and pulled it close to Tyler's chest. He turned around, shame hinting at every nerve and Josh swallowed hard. He hated making his best friend feel like this, he sighed heavily. "I just wanna know what it is, okay?"
"If I knew, don't you think I'd tell you?!" Tyler growled back and took a step farther away from him. No, I didn't think that, not since the accident anyway. Josh forced his thoughts to remain inside and he simply shook his head, reaching a hand out to him.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" Josh looked up at the sound of a thud from the fallen book and to force himself not to march over there and pull Tyler into a hug. "Tyler? What's wrong?"
Tyler was staring into his bedroom mirror, noting the black paint, red beanie, and black clothes. A sharp pain shot up into his head and he turned around, face now flushed with tears which streamed down his reddened cheeks. He grabbed his head with each of his hands, pushing with his palms as he tried to make the pain stop.
"J-Jo-Josh.." He panted as he crumbled down to the floor, knees weak and buckling. He looked up at Josh, his red eyes blurred with tears as he choked out the words from his throat. "Wh-what's happening to me?"
Josh looked at him, the invisible ropes keeping him away broke, and he rushed, throwing himself onto the ground as he gripped Tyler tightly. He stroked his hair, feeling his brain pulsate abnormally and he simply gripped him tighter, his head resting on his chest.
"Whatever it is, I'm not going anywhere. I promise."