“I would appreciate a head’s up if there are any lingering feelings from you towards him. I went against my better judgment, knowing that getting involved with you was a mistake. You need to decide if you want to prove me wrong.” Calvin’s words kept echoing on repeat in my mind.
My heart’s first reaction was for me to get up and chase after him, but the sometimes logical part of my mind told me to just let him go. Let him have his space, let him get some air and clear his mind, to cool off. But was he actually on to something? Were there any lingering feelings towards Landon on my end?
Without hesitation, my mind screamed, NO! OF COURSE THERE ISN’T, YOU IDIOT!
But was that the entire truth? Oh, how I wished that I had a girlfriend that I could mull this over with. But there was no one. Not a soul. Only Calvin, a small voice inside my head whispered. Yes. Only Calvin, it seemed.
The tears that had welled up in my eyes finally made good on their threat to overflow, streaming freely down my cheeks. Quickly hanging my head, and forming a sort of teepee blockade with my arms on the table in front of me, I gave in to all of the emotions that had been built up inside of me for so long.
“Uh, Jenna?”
That voice. The voice that I knew all too well. The voice that belonged to the person solely responsible for my current situation. Why? Why right now? What on Earth could he possibly need at this incredibly inconvenient moment? Glancing up, my eyes confirmed what my mind and ears already knew: Landon. Landon was standing next to me, for whatever reason he had, I didn’t know, but at this exact second, I didn’t care, either.
“Landon, right now is really not a good time, okay?” I managed to squeak out, returning to my previous position with my head drooped down.
“I, uh, was throwing trash away…and saw…well, that Calvin guy seemed pretty pissed. And you seemed upset, so I just thought that…I don’t know…that I’d come over and see…..if, you know…if you were….alright, or whatever…” I listened as his words spat and sputtered from his mouth.
This is new for him, flashed through my mind, and just as quickly, I disregarded it. Landon could be quite the actor when he really wanted to be. Sometimes I really thought that Broadway was definitely calling his name. There could most definitely be an Oscar in the distant future with his name all over it with some of the performances I’d seen him put on in the past.
“You….what?” I asked, looking up, fresh tears welling up, once again threatening to spill from my eyes. I was a complete and total mess, and Landon coming over here with all of his confusion and irritation wasn’t exactly the thing I needed, or wanted, right now.
“It just seemed like…I just wanted to make sure…” he started, and then paused. His face was contorted like he was having an argument with himself inside his head. “I just wanted to check and make sure that you were okay,” he finally blurted seconds later. Good grief, what was going on with him?
“Yeah, I’m fine, thanks,” I huffed out, feeling the irritation bubbling up inside of me. Once again returning to my ‘head down, arm-teepee up’ position, my senses informed me that Landon had sat down across from me where Calvin had been seated earlier. A second or two later, a couple of napkins were slid silently across the table between my two arms that were the ‘posts’ of my ‘teepee.’ This was his gesture at being ‘sweet,’ I already knew.
Releasing a silent breath, I picked up the napkins, swiping one across my nose, and then dabbing the other at each eye. From out of almost nowhere it seemed, an overwhelming burst of anger shot up inside of me. “Why are you really here, Landon?” the words flew from my mouth with an intense fierceness that I never realized that I had.
Shock flashed across Landon’s chiseled features as my words reached his ears and registered in his mind. “What do you mean?” he choked out, obviously caught off-guard by my sudden outburst of rage.
Was he actually for real right now?! Anger, irritation, and complete annoyance overtook the sadness and pity that had been all but consuming me just seconds before. “Did you think that since Calvin and I were having a disagreement, or a fight, which it actually wasn’t either of those, if you must know, but if we were, that you could just swoop right in and do…..oh, I don’t know…whatever it is you thought you were gonna do?”
Shaking his head slowly from side to side a couple of times, Landon seemed to be carefully processing his next words, which, if that were actually the case, was another very new, and very unLandon-like thing.
“Jenna, no, no, that’s not it at all. I wasn’t trying to ‘swoop’ in and do anything, honest,” he paused, his eyes intently focused onto me, as if he was studying me, “Scout’s honor,” he said, flashing me one of his patented smiles that I knew all too well, and held up three of his fingers.
“You were never a boy scout, Landon,” I reminded him, a hint of a tiny smile briefly tugging at the corner of my mouth as I dropped my head back down once again. Oh, God, I definitely hoped that Landon hadn’t seen that.
It was just a random, involuntary nerve twitching at a very inconvenient moment, that’s all, I thought, trying unsuccessfully to convince myself.
This is LANDON CRAIG, for crap’s sake, the exact same individual that shattered your heart into millions of pieces not really all that long ago, you fool! DON’T let him get to you! He’s not worth it! He’s like a debilitating virus, Jenna, you KNOW THAT!, my mind continued to shriek on, trying to reason with itself, myself, who or whatever would actually listen to it.
Ugh, everything had turned into one gigantic mess, and it felt as though I was restricted to just standing along the sidelines like a spectator, helplessly watching as my life pissed itself right down the theoretical drain.
“Yeah, well, if I had been a boy scout, you know…” Landon said, as my millisecond-long internal turmoil carried on.
The next thing I knew, he was leaning his head down towards the tabletop, and, much to that logical part of my mind’s dismay, raised my head to look at him, I saw that he had slightly tilted his head to the side, attempting to catch my eye inside my ’arm-teepee.’ The expression on his face produced an actual full-blown smile on my own, and I instantly kicked myself for it. Seeing his smug, satisfied look in response to seeing my smile (when the entire universe knew that I shouldn’t be) was more than I could take, and I began gathering up my trash and belongings, having every intention of bolting from this booth and out of this cafeteria, and as far away from Landon as possible.
“Just because you happened to make me smile a little, doesn’t mean anything, Landon,” I huffed, grabbing the last of my barely eaten lunch remains and making my way over to a trashcan.
“Look,” he said, quickly getting up from his seat, instantly right behind me, much to my dismay. “you already agreed to talk with me earlier,” he continued, leaning down uncomfortably close to my ear as I discarded my trash.
“Yeah, not like I really had a lot of choice there, now did I?” Spinning around on my heel, the anger from earlier had returned. I all but spit in Lanon’s face, he was so close to me.
Straightening up, I realized with an intense satisfaction that my words had thoroughly stunned him, his face contorting into an expression that wasn’t exactly what you would describe as ’flattering.’
“Look, this Doug kid is having a party. Come with me,” Landon’s voice came from behind me one second, and then in the next second he was once more by my side. Well, hell.
“No,” I said, stopping for the briefest of moments, hoping my body language amplified my response. Not wanting to give him the chance to respond, I began making my way towards the cafeteria doors, putting a little distance between him and I once again.
“Jenna….wait!” I heard him call from behind me in one second, and then in the next, I felt his hand on my shoulder. This was just really not turning out to be my freaking day, I thought dismally.
A feeling of utter defeat washing over me, I turned towards him, “What, Landon?” I asked, the exhaustion and defeated feelings flowed freely as I spoke.
Looking slightly taken aback, he didn’t say anything at first. But all good things must come to an end, of course. “We don’t have to go to Doug’s. We can do something else, or go somewhere else. Whatever you want, I don’t care,” he said finally, an almost pleading tone lining the edges of his voice.
“Fine, whatever, Landon. If that’s what it’s going to take to get you to leave me alone, then fine,” I said with a dismissing fling of my arm. Taking this opportunity to put any amount of distance between him and myself that I possibly could, I turned my back to him, all but running from the cafeteria, bursting through the swinging double doors and out into the hallway like I had just pulled off some elaborate prison break. My victory and freedom were incredibly short-lived, however.
“Great, thanks!” he said, seeming to materialize next to me. “I’ll pick you up at your house around seven, is that okay?” he asked, once again matching me stride for stride as we continued our way down the hall at about the pace of a snail.
“Yeah, I guess,” I said with a small sigh. Everything else aside, my curiosity was starting to get the better of me. Why was he acting this way? What was really going on? When it came to Landon Craig, there was pretty much always some sort of ulterior motive.
Much to my surprise, Landon’s lips were on my cheek, quickly placing a light kiss on them. Then, just as fast, he was bounding his way down the hall, catching up with his group of friends already set up at their usual spot.
Absentmindedly lifting my hand to my cheek, I could still slightly feel where Landon’s lips had been for that fleeting instant. I watched as he laughed and carried on with his friends at the other end of the hall, as if our entire correspondence just moments before had never even happened.
This is your life, Jenna Matthews. Hang on tight, it’s gonna be a wild ride!, I thought as the bell signaling that lunchtime was over rang loud overhead.
[[A/N: Whelp....here it is, my sweets. Of course we had to go back and get Jenna's take on everything that's happening... We can't just forget about her POV, ya know... ;-) By the way...this whole 'switching back and forth between different character's POV's' thing is completely, 110% new to me, so if I royally screw it up, I just want y'all to know that I'm apologizing now, in advance. ;-) Anyways, as always, thanks for reading, and don't forget to let me know what ya think of this chapter (and anything else!) in a comment below! Much <3..!]]