"Sandara." I heard my great grandmother whisper as she wrapped a thick blanket around me, warming me in this freezing night. I shifted from my place, making myself more comfortable and lifted my legs to my chest, hugging them to stabilize my temperature. After all, according to the radio, France will experience their coldest nights starting from this day.
I heard someone cough from behind me and only when she spoke did I realize it was my great grandmother again. "You haven't taken a bath for the past two weeks." She pointed out, worriedly.
"I am aware." I softly answered, whispering and a veil of smoke escaped my lips since the temperature was too cold. My fingers starts to feel numb already and I clenched them to keep my temperature again.
"You only have eaten a piece of bagel and a cup of soup for the past two weeks." She reminded me, more worried than before.
I blinked my eyes and once again, sighed. "I am aware."
"You have been sitting there for two weeks." She croaked, on the verge of tears. "Sandara, please. Don't do that to yourself. Jiyong already-"
"He'll come back." I insisted, fixing my gaze again on the tall metal bars in front of me. "I know he'll come back."
"What if-" She paused, her breathing hitched and her next words sounded unsure. "Sandara, you could always wait inside."
"No." I firmly answered, my clenched fists tightening and then, I quickly remembered Jiyong's fake ease in front of my family. Even though he said he was fine, the truth is he wasn't. "He's not comfortable with my family. Jiyong won't come inside to find me." I said, mostly reminding myself.
"Sandara." She whispered and then sighed. "Okay. If that's what you want. Just call me if it gets too cold."
"Just one more day." I immediately said and she stopped walking back towards the mansion, her footsteps stopping midway. I, on the other hand, started crying again, and I wiped off the tears using my cool fingertips. "I told myself that I'll only wait for 18 days since that's a special number for us. Tomorrow is the 18th day and if he didn't return, I'll stop." I hiccupped. "I'll stop waiting for him." I buried my face in the gap between my knees and my torso, and cried.
I felt my great grandmother run back towards the mansion, her cries also filling the cold dry night and as much I can't take waiting for him, she can't take seeing me waiting.
~
After 5 years
"Park Sandara! Don't run up there!" I heard my father loudly call from downstairs. "And hurry up! The royal family doesn't make anyone wait for long."
I appeared at the top of the stairs, the left strap of my dress still loosened, lying limply at my arm and the zipper at my back still open. "But it's my first time going into an amusement park after so long!"
My great grandmother appeared from behind me and started doing the zipper and the ribbon belt as I continue to blabber in front of my father. "I can't believe that the royal family would be invited to an event like this! I thought-wow!-I could only see hotels, buildings and landmarks. This is the first time I'm going to cut a ribbon for an amusement park!"
My father sighed, shaking his head as he took a sip from his hot coffee and said, "I did it a couple of times before. The royal family are human beings too you know. We're not all about class."
My great grandmother tapped my shoulder as soon as she was finished and I started hopping down the stairs, even though it may sound impossible while wearing high heels. Two of the palace guards readied themselves in case I trip on the way down.
But I had safely landed on the ground and I started jumping out of excitement. "Can I ride the rollercoaster?"
"You're twenty six, Sandara. You can do whatever you want." My father answered, smiling at me. "But may I remind you that we have a coronation party to attend to after the ribbon cutting. So maybe you could go there next time."
I raised my arms up in the air, excitement spreading around my body. "Yes!"
"Yunji, tell Callux we're ready." My father said, pointing at my great grandmother and the latter bowed in reply.
I grinned at my father, who replied it with a soft smile.
I raised myself up in the open window on the ceiling and started to wave at the citizens gathered around me.
"Princess Sandara!" Some would shout and I try to give them my best smile. Even though I'm not the heir apparent, people have liked through the bravery I've shown in finding my father after my story was leaked to the public. And for the time I have been here as their princess, I learned things about being a monarch. Father told me that the sight of the royal family being happy indicates that the country is happy as well. We are a symbol, he said, and that's why I tried my best to show the other countries the culture of France as well as show them some of the culture of Korea since I'm half-Korean.
When I was first introduced to the people, they were really shocked but they were even more shocked to hear that my father had two more children since after all, they never saw him with his wife. But nonetheless, we were accepted even if we were born and raised in Korea. My mother and my siblings were brought here to France as soon as possible.
My father didn't know that he had a son so he was really happy to see Sanghyun. At first, since I was the first born, I am the next heir to the throne and was expected to rule the whole France after five years. With the sudden appearance of Sanghyun, however, my fate changed and he caught the burden from me. Since he was born a man, Sanghyun was even more expected to govern the people of France. He readily accepted it with one condition: he gets to choose who he marries.
"I will accept to be the next to the throne but with one condition." Sanghyun said, crossing his arms and my father raised one eyebrow as an attempt for him to go on. Sanghyun continued, "I will get to choose who I marry."
I snorted and clamped a hand over my mouth.
My father laughed. "Of course, son. Who doesn't?"
Sanghyun spared a worried glance at me.
My father sighed. "I didn't say that I didn't approve of Kwon Jiyong. He decided on his own to leave your sister. May it be insecurities or what, I don't know."
Suddenly, the floor seemed to be interesting and I looked down on it, holding my tears back. "Let's stop this talk." I croaked.
"Honey," My mother whispered, calling my father's attention.
My father clapped his hand after getting the idea. "Why don't we play UNO while waiting for the pizza and pasta? Right?"
Durami replied, "Yeah!"
I went back down to my seat, which was contradicting to Sanghyun's and Durami's, and then sighed. My mother handed me her pack of wet tissues and I pulled one out. Wiping my face, I sighed in relief because the tissue warms my overheated face just right.
"Oh!" Durami cried, pointing at the window. "Is that Jiyong?"
My ears perked up and I turn quickly at the window behind her, my eyes almost bulging out of its sockets. "Where?"
Durami laughed and quickly pointed at me. "You still love him, don't you?"
Sanghyun brought her finger down with his hand, and with his best irritated face, said, "That's not a good joke, Durami."
I laughed, more like snorted and continued wiping my face. "She's right, Sanghyun."
Sanghyun's jaw dropped, but he was still holding Durami's finger. "But Noona!"
I shrugged, folding the now dry tissue. "That's love."
Durami stuck her tongue out at Sanghyun and withdraw her finger from his grasp. "I told you, Oppa. Jiyong is still the core of her heart."
Sanghyun rolled his eyes and suggested, "Maybe you mean the content of her heart."
"What would you do then?" Durami turned to me again. "Wait?"
Sanghyun groaned, exasperated. "Can't you see that's what she's doing again?"
"And she's going to stay like that?" Durami countered. "You're so negative and indecisive, future crowned King of France."
Sanghyun rolled his eyes and I just smiled. Because I don't really have a plan to start with but I know that I love Jiyong-even after 5 long years.
~
The bishop anointed Sanghyun with holy water and chrism, changed his Dauphin crown into a Roi and handed him the main de justice, the sceptre with the fleur de lis on it and the cruciger.
The bishop smiled and announced, "Sanghyun Park, King of France."
Every one cheered and erupted into an applause while shouting, "Viva le Roi!"
I grinned with both thumbs up at Sanghyun, who looked uncomfortable with the Roi on top of his head, the red coronation mantle behind him, the expensive and jewel-studded clothes and especially the sheathed sword beside him. After the applause, he quickly placed the sceptre, the main de justice and cruciger on the velvet cushion and removed the sword from his hip, handing it over to Callux. Durami and I laughed because apparently, the heir apparent is not very comfortable.
We both went to our table, where my mother and father were waiting patiently. I looked around and saw Sanghyun getting busy over the other monarch families all around the globe. I could tell that he was speaking different languages per person, because his lips changes speed every person. Then he suddenly stiffened when he was introduced to the Princess of Hungary.
I laughed and took a seat beside my mother.
"Sanghyun's got a boner for the Princess of Hungary." Durami pointed out, her voice loud enough for only me to hear and I laughed.
"Well look at that, it's the eleventh president of South Korea, Park Geun Hye." My father said and smiled. "And there are a lot of business tycoons here."
I whipped my head towards the entrance door and was crestfallen to see British business tycoons rather than Korean behind the Korean president. Durami giggled from beside me and said, "Expecting someone?"
I smile before scoffing. "I must be crazy."
"You are." Durami assured. "You just don't notice."
"Well then," My father loudly said, earning our attention once more. "I will help Sanghyun with the greetings. If you'll both excuse us. My queen and I need to do some proper greetings with some important people." He handed out a hand to my mother, who accepted it with delight and once my mother had stood up, they both disappeared into the crowd.
"I'm meeting with my boyfriend." Durami excused, standing up.
"Where is he?" I asked, raising a brow at her.
She whispers, "He's a very introverted guy, you know that do you?"
I shrug. "Well, he is. Where is he?"
Durami points to somewhere far the hall, where a very fine and handsome man was sitting alone with a dozen of very beautiful and brave young maidens around him. He tried slapping them away as if they were insects but they wouldn't budge. They still swoon over him.
Durami laughs as if it was a good thing. "He doesn't flirt-or two-times but he does get jealous immediately."
"Yeah." I laughed. "I could tell."
"Well, then single lady." Durami winked at me. "I'm going to the love of my life."
"No need for emphasis." I said and she waved her hand dismissively at me. Durami starts to walk towards her boyfriend, who upon looking up saw her immediately. He smiled, a full mega-watt smile that could light up Paris and immediately the young maidens, who probably noticed that that smile was special, walked off.
Suddenly, a classical cotillion music started to play in the background and Jax, Durami's boyfriend, stood up suddenly, startling my sister. He bowed at Durami and asked for her hand courteously. Durami giggly accepted the offer and they started off in the dance floor.
My eyes travelled on to the dance floor where Sanghyun, who was incredibly red, was dancing with the Princess of Hungary. I mentally and hysterically laughed.
My parents were divided. My father was dancing with the Queen of England while my mother was dancing with the Prince of Wales.
My family is already peaceful and I am more than grateful for that. My mission of finding my father has now been accomplished. We're complete...but I'm still not happy with it. There's something missing and I know it was him. It has always been him.
I stood up and went to the balcony, where I found peace. The music doesn't reach it and no one was there. Vines and flowers stretched and adorned the large posts, the balcony itself and even the swing at the middle. I sat on the swing, pushed using my feet and the swing came into life rocking me comfortably in my loneliness. The breeze continue on scraping my face and I feel contented. This was the perfect spot.
I reached inside my clutch bag and grabbed my phone. Holding the number one on the touch keypad, I tried speed dialling. After a few rings, a husky and tired voice answered the phone.
"Dara?"
I almost cried. His voice was enough to make me remember how much I miss him.
"Are you crying again?" He asked and I rapidly shook my head but then quickly remembered that he can't see me, so instead I said, "No. No, of course not."
He chuckled. "Liar."
I laughed-coughed and remembered that if I didn't wait that time five years ago, I wouldn't be talking to him right now.
Twenty minutes. There are twenty minutes left until I stop waiting for him-until the 18 days turn 19. My great grandmother was already waiting for me behind with a towel on her hands and a couple of housemaids around her. Pollux, Callux' brother, decided to come along if ever I fall unconscious due to starvation. I stood up from the ground and steadied myself amidst the internal conflict I'm having with my body. My knees are beginning to buckle because of the lack of energy. My head is hurting from the lack of sleep. My whole system are trying their best to keep me going for the last twenty minutes, even though my blood has been not functioning well in delivering nutrients.
Ten minutes had passed and there are ten minutes left. I squeezed my own arms and assured myself. There is no such thing as waiting in vain or waiting for nothing. I know and deep inside my stomach I know that Jiyong will come back. He has to.
I closed my eyes and started to count. Ten.
Nine.
Eight.
Seven.
Six.
Five.
Four.
Three.
Two.
One.
"Madame!"
I opened my eyes and saw Armstead, going down his motorcycle. He grabbed something from inside his suit and handed it over to me, slipping his hand in the now safe metal bars. (I had the security turn off the electricity on them for the last twenty minutes.)
I thanked him and grabbed the letter from him--
I woke up with a bitter aftermath then I looked at the bowl beside me and found out they had been force-feeding me some bitter gourd. I must've feel unconscious. On my right, Armstead was sipping something hot, the smoke rising from the cup and when I turned on my left, I found myself staring at the beautiful eyes of my-
"What were you thinking?" He spatter, a few drops of his saliva hitting my face and I reached out to wipe them off.
Forget about the beautiful eyes. My father's eyes are red from anger now and not as much as beautiful they had been. "Well, welcome home to you."
"I heard from your great grandmother that you've been waiting for two weeks-"
"It's nineteen days." I corrected.
"Whatever!" He shouted, pointing at the window. "Why are you waiting for someone who's not going to come back? Are you insane?"
Armstead coughed. "Can I intrude, your highness? I have something that may set things right."
He reached for something inside his suit and handed it over to me. It was the same letter I accepted from him before I passed out. Carefully, I opened it and found a handwritten letter with a return address of the airport in France.
"Uh," Armstead cleared his throat. "He wrote it when we were waiting for his flight."
Babe,
There are many things I have been wanting to tell and explain to you but because of the things happening back in Korea, I have to quickly fly back without a proper explanation. You may blame your father for me leaving but I assure you that the only thing he told me was that I was perfect for you.
And I know you are too for me.
You just have met your father that's why I didn't tell you that my father had a heart attack, because I'll bring you back again to Korea. The doctor said that he should have a heart surgery to keep him alive but before my mother could agree, the lawyer appeared and said that my father told him that he didn't want any transplant. And I'm going back without you to spend with him his remaining months.
When you cried for me back at the mansion, I know I lied and I'm sorry for that. I'm a little worried that I'll hurt you even more if I promise that I'll come back but never at all. You know that I'm the heir to the business and after my father dies, I would be the one taking over. It's not easy to adjust, my mother told me and it could take a while before I come back to you. And you're the heir presumptive to the throne. You are needed there. I'm needed here. We are going to separate in the end.
We're still dating, you got that? There are no proper closures and you're still mine. Don't try to flirt or date with anyone there even though I know French are very romantic and wholesome people. Even though we are destined to be separated, I'm going to come back for you. Just wait until the heir is crowned and I'll also wait until the business gets back to its former status. Then we'll get married.
As for now, we'll talk over video calls, phone calls and letters.
Forever yours,
Jiyong
I wiped the tears escaping from my eyes and hugged Armstead.