"Are you ready?" Charlie asks, handing me a black leather jacket he has hanging in his closet. I put it on, zipping it up to my neck, moving my hair out of its path. I feel Amelia shift, having nearly forgotten that she is strapped into a harness on my back. Charlie decided that the sooner we go and visit my brother, the better. So, without much planning, we have decided to leave and be back before dark. And since Kane has been holed up in his office all day, we couldn't have chosen a better day.
"As ready as I can be," I say, following Charlie back into the hall. "Thank you again."
Charlie nods, looking around the corner. "Kane's light is off in his room, so he's probably in his office still. We have to be careful though, he's a stealthy guy."
I nod, trying to be as silent as possible. I hate the idea of going behind Kane's back again, especially with what took place at the Social Gathering, but I don't have many options at this point. I need to see Paul, and I need to see him now.
We go past Kane's office unnoticed, then stop short before heading into the main room. Who knows how many people are sitting out there; enjoying their own recreational time. Will they notice us, or can we make it through? I step closer to Charlie, and peer around the corner with him.
"Don't act too suspicious, let's just try to act normal and head out the tunnel like we are going out for a walk," Charlie instructs, pulling his hood up, then slipping on a pair gloves. The weather has taken a nasty turn over the course of the day, dropping at least thirty degrees. I heard some of the men discussing the possibility of a small snow flurry.
We work our way out into the main room, and I'm surprised by the lack of men sitting about. There are a few huddled in one corner, playing cards; and another paunchy man zonked out on a couch. None of them notice us, so Charlie and I slip into the tunnel without any problems. The tunnel smells wet and musky, and I adjust the collar of my jacket.
"You have everything?" Charlie asks, and I nod, walking further down the tunnel. With Charlie's help, I am able to remove the cement slab in front of the entrance. I brace myself; imagining how cold it must be outside.
Charlie and I walk outside, and I have to pause a moment, letting my eyes adjust. Kane's lair has very few windows, and having been stuck inside the complex for the past few days, the bright light is overwhelming. Charlie tosses me a small handgun, and I frown, slightly confused.
"Just in case," He says, his jaw clenched. I know that Charlie is worried. He is worried about going behind Kane's back, but I can tell he is also very worried about me. In his mind, I'm not safe anywhere but with him and the rest of the men, locked away in a building with no access to the outside world. Letting me reach out to my brother must be hard for him; I can tell.
"Does Amelia look okay?" I ask. "Does she look comfortable?"
Charlie carefully adjusts the harness, and I hear Amelia gurgle to herself; obviously pleased. She must be fine.
"I'd say so," Charlie says, placing his hand just above my hip, guiding me onto the street. We keep our heads low, not wanting to draw any undue attention to ourselves. I feel safer walking on the streets now that I have a guide. The other night when I was alone, Lady Paula was my guide in her own way. But back when I lived on the streets, I had to take care of myself. There was no one else to help me; take care of me. This is a nice change.
After a few miles we come to a small intersection, and that's when I see them. Two Government Agents walking our way. I try to keep body language calm, and I don't say anything when Charlie pulls me to his side. "Pretend like we're just out for a walk," Charlie whispers, and then he laughs and I follow suite. We keep our heads low, and I press closer to Charlie.
"Quite a day for a walk, eh?" One of the Agents say to Charlie in passing, and he just chuckles, not really wanting to start up a conversation with either of the Feds. I keep my head down, trying to get my heart rate to go back to normal.
"How much further?" Charlie asks as we turn the corner. He doesn't sound tired, but I have noticed his nervous glances towards side streets and occupied houses. His worry must be slightly contagious, because I am starting to feel anxious myself. The run-in with the Agents has set me on edge.
"Another mile or so," I say, not for sure, but I know we are close. I recognize this neighborhood from the other night when we were walking to the Social Gathering. It is only a few blocks from where I used to live. "Maybe not even that."
"What are you hoping to get out of this visit?" Charlie asks. He doesn't sound angry when he asks it, but he does sound genuinely curious.
"I just want to see my brother," I say simply. "We haven't really seen each other since I was Abandoned, and that was about eleven years ago."
"My brother was Abandoned, and I missed him for a long time. But then, that hope- the hope that I'd see him again- was replaced by realization. I knew he wasn't coming back, and I almost hated him for it. I thought- maybe if he had tried harder- life could've been different. I know better now. Let's just hope that your brother hasn't gotten to that point and given up hope," Charlie says.
I look up, and am surprised to see that we have already come to my old neighborhood. My heart begins to hammer at the thought of walking up the steps of my house again; this time as Felicia. Will my brother even recognize me?
"Which of these fancy houses is yours milady?" Charlie asks, motioning down the long street. I scan the line of houses until I reach the one that I used to call home.
"The one with the light on in the upstairs window to the left," I smile, remembering how Paul had been up there when I was here the other night too. "That's my brother's room."
"How do you know your parents aren't home?" Charlie asks, bring up a valid point. They could be home, and that would most definitely complicate things. But I have already thought of this.
"My parents used to go to work every morning at about this time, and it appears to be that my brother is the only one home," I say. It is rare for someone to lose their job, unless someone in their family doesn't abide by the Government's rules. That happened to my mother, and I have always felt guilty because of it.
I feel Amelia shift, and I try to adjust the straps on her holder.
"Well, let's go then," Charlie says. "We don't want to be gone too long."
I nod, trudging alongside of him as we make our way down the street. I feel every nerve in my body come to attention as we near my house. I won't let my anxiety get the better of me; this isn't the time or the place for that.
"Are you okay?" Charlie asks, wrapping his arm around my waist. I nod, laying my head against his shoulder as we walk.
"Here we are," I say, my voice shaky as I look up the stairs of my old front porch. I reluctantly walk forward, making my way up to the front porch. My footsteps feel heavy, and I swallow the lump in my throat. I raise my hand up to knock, then very lightly, I tap on the door.
I wait for a few seconds, wondering if maybe I hadn't knocked loud enough. But then, I hear the sound of footsteps, muffled by the door.
The door opens, and there is Paul, wearing a pair of sweats, his glasses askew, his hair ruffled.
"I came to return the dress," I say quietly.
Paul swallows, and crosses his arms over his chest.
"You aren't the woman who borrowed the dress from me," Paul says. I reach for the holder Amelia is sitting in, and point to just behind her, in the outer pocket. Charlie gets the hint, and opens to pocket, and pulls out the chiffon dress.
Paul looks completely awestruck as Charlie hands him the dress. Paul backs up a good foot, putting his hands on his hips.
"Who on earth are you?" Paul asks. "Because you are most definitely not the woman I loaned this very dress to."
I take a deep breath, hoping beyond hope that Paul will accept me; that my brother will accept me. I don't think anything could prepare me for his rejection. I have only pictured him welcoming me with open arms. That isn't set in stone, though.
"Paul," I say, my voice shaky despite my attempt to calm my frazzled nerves.
"How do you know my name?" Paul interrupts, his voice rising with worry.
"It's me," I say, my voice breaking. "It's Felicia."
For a second no one says anything, and all that meets my ears is an eerie silence. I start to wonder if my brother will slam the door in my face; call me crazy. Soon, though, my brother is running forward, and his arms wrap around me. I feels tears run down my cheeks, and I pull my brother closer, wishing it could always be like this.
"I knew I'd see you again," He says, pulling back, and I notice a few tears scattered about on his cheeks too. I smile at him, and imagine how life could've been if we had gotten to grow up together. If we had, a moment like this wouldn't be as special; it would've been taken for granted. So maybe-in some little way-my brother and I have a stronger bond than most siblings.
"Mom and Dad aren't home, right?" I ask, not ready for them to know about me yet. Paul shakes his head, looking confused by my question.
"Sadly, no. They have been hoping for you to come back since the day you were taken," Paul says, and his voice gets low due to the painful memory.
"That's a good thing," I say quietly. "They can't know about me Paul. It could put them in danger. I need you to keep this between us; they can't know I was here."
Paul looks confused for a minute, but then his features soften, and a knowing look takes over.
"You're worried about what's going on with the Year Movement? The Government won't win Fel, we are too powerful," Paul says. His look of determination startles me a bit. I don't know if it's Paul's use of my old nickname, or the look of hope in his eyes, but tears begin to stream down my face again. My little brother will never fail to amaze me.
"I just... I need to lay low for now. Kane and his men are taking very good care of me," I say, glancing at Charlie. Charlie smiles, and nods. Out of all of Kane's men, there are only three I have come to trust. Kane himself, Charlie, and Paul- who believed in me when others didn't.
"You have been staying with Kane?" Paul asks, and his eyes grow wide with excitement. "I knew he wasn't killed in that explosion."
"No, but my head was," I mumble under my breath, and Charlie just laughs. My brother seems to realize that Charlie is here for the first time, and he turns all of his attention on him. I can't pin down what exactly to call his expression, but he doesn't look happy to see Charlie.
"You didn't bring Kane with you?" My brother asks, sounding much more disappointed than I could've expected. The fact that my brother is already interested in this kind of stuff worries me. When I was his age, I had no choice. Maybe- in some small way- he doesn't either.
"No. And when he finds out I left, I'm gonna have a lot of explaining to do. I needed to see you though. The other night when I saw you, and you looked at me like a complete stranger, it made me realize just how much I've missed you."
Paul nods, coming forward for another embrace. His arms are strong, and he smells of cologne. He's not the little four year old I remember leaving behind. But that isn't a bad thing; not in his case. I trust my brother, and I know he hasn't changed in any way that I would disapprove of.
"Are you sure I can't call mom and dad and ask them to come home early?" Paul asks, adjusting his glasses on the bridge of his tan nose. "They have held hope that you would come see us again for a very long time Fel. I don't think it's fair for them not to be here when it is finally happening."
I swallow the lump in my throat, and shake my head. "Nothing is fair around here Paul. That's what I am hoping to fix. I don't want to bring mom and dad into this anymore than they already have. I want to see them too, but at the moment, them knowing about me could throw things off."
Paul nods, but he doesn't look pleased, and on that note, he doesn't look convinced either. He shifts his weight, leaning against the doorframe. His arms cross over his chest, and I realize just how much my brother and I have in common. Our perseverant nature is very high on that list.
"How is my knowing about you any different than theirs?" He asks, posing a logical question.
"There really isn't a difference," I say honestly. "But for some reason you are the one I decided to trust. Please, don't abuse that."
Paulnods, gulping down any other disagreements.
A/N~ Sorry for the wait. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Drop your thoughts down in the comments below :) Reading them always brings a smile to my face- Sarah