*Flashback 1983 - Seattle*
My name is Megan Garner. I am currently walking to my best mates house who happens to live right next door to me.
I moved here to Seattle in 1978 all the way from the countryside in Australia when i was twelve years old. I was sent off to live with my grandmother who lives here.
My best mate Michael or Duff as everyone calls him, has been acting really strange towards me for the last couple of weeks.
I can't take it anymore & decided to go have a talk with him to find out what's going on.
I feel like i have done something wrong by him.
So I walk over and knock on the front door of his mothers home. Her name is Alice McKagan she is such a loving, caring soul. She has always worked very hard to provide for her eight children all on her own since she and Duff's father Mac had gotten divorced.
Along with the whole five, nearly six years I have known her, she has always treated me like as if i were her own daughter since the day I met her.
"Hey honey!, how have you been?". Alice asks whilst answering and opening the door. But I notice she isn't as happy as her usual self. Her smile seems forced.
"Hi Ma" ,i always call Alice Ma because she has been way more of a mother to me than my biological mother back home in Australia, who was and probably still is a severe alcoholic.
I wouldn't even know anymore. The childhood I had back home was not exactly a childhood any child should have to grow up in. It didnt help that my parents were young when they had me.
My parents always had a very tumultuous relationship since I was old enough to remember.
I was a so called "mistake child" who was the result from a drunken night of kids being kids, I was told numerous times.
My father did stick around for a year or so, although I know he cheated on my mother with numerous women.
When he left, my mothers bad habits seemed to spiral even more out of control. To such an uncontrollable state that my grandmother Doris who had been living in Seattle all my life, ended up going to court against her for custody.
Sick of hearing how bad it was for me there, when she would regularly talk to me as a kid over the phone.
With that, my mother seemed happy to be rid of me. As if i were a burden to her since the day i was born.
Even though I basically looked after myself since I could walk.
So.. that is how i have been living here happily in Seattle for nearly 6 years.
"Yeah I'm not bad, i just thought I'd pop over to see Michael"
"I haven't seen him around much lately?" I question.
"How are you?, is everything ok, you seem a bit unhappy?. I add giving her a hug.
" Oh um.. I'm guessing Michael hasn't told you?" Alice replies in a sad tone. Looking down at her hands.
"Told me what?!", i reply now really curious about whats going on.
"That..umm", Alice looks like she wants to tell me but is not sure if she should.
"Tha..That he's finally decided to move to L.A dear, with his brother Bruce to go further with his music".
"No , He hasn't told me anything!", "I've barely seen him the last couple of weeks". I reply feeling like my heart had just shattered into a million pieces.
" I think you will find dear...
that he just doesn't know how to tell you?'.
'Especially with how close you two are, basically like brother and sister". Alice smiles.
"I'm sure going to miss my little boy being around" Alice adds, looking like she wants to cry.
"Is he home now?" I question.
"No he's not here hun, i only just finished work" she lets out, rubbing her tired eyes.
" Ok Um... I'm going to try over at the playing field?, he's probably out playing a game of ball, you know what he's like with his baseball." I laugh trying to lighten the sad news.
" Yes i do" Alice chuckles, knowing how much her boy loves his baseball ,which he's played for roughly ten years.
" I will see you later hun" Alice waves me goodbye.
"See ya later" i wave back with a smile, although i feel like i could just cry.
How could i cope without Duff being here?. He is the one person in my whole life, I have grown so incredibly close to.
Ever since we met when I first moved here all those years ago, we got along like a house on fire. We have such a strong bond, that i never thought i could have with anyone.
After several minutes of walking over to the local oval that both Duff and i spent so much time hanging out at. Most of the time it was us two and Donner who i am also great friends with.
Us three together always get up to all sorts of trouble as none of us finished school.
(Donner was the name of Duffs friend, who helped out around the time of the hell tour/early Seattle days.)
As i approach the empty looking field, it's getting late so I know the sun is about to set.
My eyes have persistent tears that are wanting to just stream out, slightly blurring my vision.
I make out in the far distance two young male bodies out playing ball. I knew straight away from where they were playing I knew it was, Donner and Duff.
As i get closer Donner sees me first and yells "Hey Meg's go along!".
He pitches the ball to Duff, who missed not even attempting to hit the ball, probably because he knew I was there.
The ball then lands down near my feet. I pick up the ball then pad on the green turf towards Duff who was still looking away with his back to me. Not wanting to acknowledge me being there.
I was sick of him ignoring me, we were always very close and never argued, only when we would pretend to be angry and just messing around.
My temper throws the ball just a couple of inches away from Duffs head.
" Fu#k you then" i yell pissed off.
"What the fu#k!!..Megan".
"That almost hit me!!". Duff yelled more in shock than anything.
No shit sherlock! I thought to myself.
"What the hell crawled up your arse and died!" he snickered. Throwing down the baseball bat.
"You, you asshole!", "Why didn't you tell me!" i yell, now storming right up to his tall 6'2 frame compared to my short 5'3 if that frame.
"I..I was going to tell you", Duff replies looking down at the grass of the field.
"Oh... I'm sure you were!.. What on the day you leave!!" i shout angrily, yes i do have quite the temper when I'm mad.. not a force you want to reckon with.
I grab him by the arms to shove him ,until he reversed it by grabbing my arms and pulling me into a tight hug, his attempt of calming and restraining me from hitting him. He pulled me down onto the grass of the oval , pulling me into his lap.
"I will catch you guys later on" Donner says quietly heading home.
I just broke down sobbing into Duffs shoulder. A mixture of not wanting to lose him but also anger from him avoiding me for weeks and not telling me himself.
"I'm guessing my Ma told you?", he asked looking down at me as if he already knew.
I look up at Duff with an evil glare. "At least she told me and hasn't been avoiding me for the last couple of weeks!... unlike someone". I turn in his arms and jab my finger at his chest.
"I am so sorry Meg.." I'm sorry i didn't tell you myself and for avoiding you!" He said looking down at me ashamed and not proud of how he went about it.
" I just didn't know how to tell you, i didn't want to upset you and i knew you would be and i hate seeing you upset more than anything". "But trust me, it's hard for me to leave too, i really hate to leave you behind and my Ma".
" But you know how long I've wanted to move to LA, to join a bigger band and I have a better chance of making it big time with my music in LA". Duff says softly next to my ear, with my head resting back on his shoulder.
"I know".." We've both dreamed of Los Angeles, basically the whole time we've known each other". I say softly looking up at Duff. He then wipes the last of my tears away with his thumb, looking down at me with a sad smile.
" You were to be a big L.A rockstar and I was to be a famous LA actress or... something!?", I throw my hands in the air, both of us chuckling at our big childhood plans.
"You will make it big someday Duff , I just know it and from watching you play.. I will always be your biggest fan!". I say looking up at him, who now has a big grin on his face.
"How stupid was I?!" I huffed.
"To think I'd ever get to do something big like that" i laugh at myself, for thinking i would ever get to L.A. let alone end up being known as somebody big.. not just a short, ugly girl who's own parents didn't even want her and moved half way across the world just to feel the slightest bit of approval and acceptance.
"No! You could do that!"..."stop putting yourself down all the time". Duff replies reassuringly and in a stern tone looking down at me, now gently gripping my hands in his.
" You might of had a rough childhood, but from that you came out strong and very independent for someone your age!". "Plus.. you're pretty, intelligent , funny , very caring .. and you love rock n roll!, unlike all the other petty b!tches around town." Duff chuckles looking at me and giving me a wink.
"So just set your mind to it ..you could do and be anything you want to be!". " You could easily have all the guys you want wrapped around your finger". He adds.
"Haha...Yeah right!," i laugh it off.
We both sat in silence for a good ten minutes, staring out at the now beautiful sunset.
"Why don't you come with me?". Duff whispers in my ear, filling in the long gap of silence.
I look up at him contemplating the idea."I would love to! ... but you know i can't. I reply thinking in more realistic terms and not dreams.
"Why not?" Duffs smile dropped in an instant. " My brother and I will look after you". He replies in a more hopeful tone.
"Well because, I only just turned seventeen"... "And i need to stay and look after my Gran, she can bearly get around the house anymore without my help" I respond
" I can't just leave her, when she's the one who chose to bring me in and look after me"."Now it's my turn to look after her" I add, although I would love to just go with him.
"You've always put everyone else's needs before your own" Duff replies looking down with a sweet smile.
Duff understood, but he was so protective of Megan. How was he to know if she would be ok?.
"I'm going to miss you so much Meg's". Duff says softly now squeezing me in a hug, wrapping his arms around me from behind.
" You are kinda like the little sister that i never had!". He says softly.
"And you are the big brother that i never had."... "I'm going to be lost without you here". I whispered.
We both promised each other to keep in contact that night.... he left for L.A. a week later.