"Know what I was thinking, baby?" Zayn said out loud to Harry when she heard him walking in the living room.
"What?"
"I want to cook a special dinner for Mum and Safaa when they come on Friday. But I don't know what I should make."
"Hmm..." Harry said and he lifted the basket of freshly dried clothes over the back of the couch and sat them next to her. "Does it have to be a special dinner?"
"Yes, it has to be special. This is the first time they're coming to visit me in forever."
"And I get that." He leaned over the couch and put his hands on her shoulders. "But what I'm saying is why does it have to be a dinner at all? Because if it is a dinner, then your dad won't benefit because he's not coming until Saturday. Why don't you make a dessert instead. Then he could always get a piece later."
She gasped. "That's a good idea. I think I will do that. Plus that's fair and Daddy always appreciates a good desert. Maybe I should keep you around. Every now and then you do throw out a good idea or two to help me."
He smiled and put his hands to the side of her face, then tilted her head back. "Just every now and then?"
"Yeah."
He hummed and leaned down to kiss her. She kissed back, but the kiss was so uncomfortable, being that it was upside down.
"Is this the last load you're going to do for today?" He asked when he saw her turn sideways and face the basket of clothes.
"No. Why?"
"Because I've been wanting to spend some time with you but you keep hindering my plans."
"What plans?"
"My plans to snuggle with you... and stuff."
She grabbed a towel from the basket and began to fold it. "Harry, my family will be here in two days. The house needs to be cleaned and the clothes have to be washed, cleaned, and put up. So if you want to do your plans, you should get your little butt over here and help me. If we get finished in time, you can get what you want."
She took the towel she just folded and transferred it to an empty basket on the floor.
"But we've got tomorrow too. We don't have to do everything today."
This time she pulled a pair of Harry's underwear from the basket. "I know. But I still want to. All I want to have to do tomorrow is vacuum the carpets."
"Which you'll probably end up making me do."
"You read my mind."
Harry sighed then came around the couch, sitting up on his knees behind her. "How about we make a deal? I'll vacuum the carpets if you give me attention."
He started to message her shoulders but she shook her head. "No."
"Come on, Z. Turn around."
"Are you planning on helping me do these clothes?"
"Not really."
"Then I'm not giving you any attention right now."
"Fine." He put his hand underneath her shirt and rubbed her back. She knew he was only doing it, thinking it would successfully coax her into paying attention to him. But she just ignored him, folded another towel and put it in the basket on the floor. Just as she was pulling out a washcloth though, his other hand went up her shirt and right away, her bra no longer fit tightly around her as it did before. She gasped. "Harry, did you really just..."
He pushed his hands around her, underneath her loosened bra, then cupped her breasts with both hands. "Did I just what?"
When she felt him kiss her shoulder all the way up to her neck, she threw the washcloth back in the basket. "I said no attention and you just had to go and take off my bra."
"Technically, I haven't taken it off yet. I just unsnapped it. But we can take it off once we're upstairs."
Zayn scoffed. "I already told you what we need to do."
"I know. And we can finish it later."
"Harry." She put her hands on his wrists and tried to pull them away. But he sucked on her neck just a little, causing her to delay that action.
"I think we both deserve this. Especially you, after all the stuff you've dealt with over the past week."
She chuckled. "You really think smooth talk is going to make me give in?"
"Not at all. I literally just pictured myself bending you over the dryer in the laundry room. I wouldn't consider that being smooth whatsoever."
She couldn't believe he actually said that. "What? I think we both know that is not my ideal place for something like that."
He pulled her back against him. "I know. But it's okay to have a wild thought every now and then." His hands started to roam her body even more when he pushed one under the waistband of her leggings, but over her underwear and between her legs.
"Really? You want to do this on the couch? Company is going to have to sit here this weekend."
"Then let's take it upstairs. I've been trying to say this nicely, but I don't think you get it. I really want to fuck you right now." He said bluntly.
"Wow, you just came right out and said it."
He pressed his face her cheek. "Yeah, because that's what I really want to do."
When he nipped at her neck, she placed a hand over the hand he had between her legs but didn't try to remove it. "How bad?"
"I believe the way I'm touching you, already shows you how bad. That should not even be a question. The question is, do you want me equally?"
She looked at the basket, trying to force herself to say no and finish what she wanted to do. But at the same time, Harry was making her feel some kind of way inside and she was pretty sure that if she let him touch her like this any longer and not let him do what he wanted, she'd end up going crazy herself. "I'm not bending over a dryer though."
He laughed. "How about a table? Would you bend over that for me?"
"No. I'm not bending over anything. No dryer, no table, no kitchen counter. Do you want me or not?"
"Hell yeah." He took his hands from her and stood up, then hurriedly pulled up to her feet. He basically pushed her all the way up the stairs and when they got to the bedroom, they only stoppes to kiss once.
For fun, she was willing to let him be the one to undress her. So she just raised her arms and let him remove her shirt and her bra at once. As soon as those were removed, they the fell onto the bed together and he left love bites and hickies all over her chest. As much as he was ready to be inside her, he didn't want to rush right into it without actually enjoying getting to have her. So he just imagined her tasting like milk chocolate and somehow it made his patience worth the while.
Finally, when he finished marking her, he began to finish udressing her. Zayn laughed at the way he struggled to pull her leggings and panties down. It was cute how he could always talk up a good game to get her in the mood but he seemed so awkward about it when they were actually into it.
"Ready?" He asked after he leaned down to kiss her.
"Yes."
"Want me to start off slow again?"
"No."
"Should I use my fingers first?"
"No."
That surprised him. "Are you sure? Because I really don't want to hurt you."
"Just put it in."
He smiled as he watched her open her legs for him and he could tell she was already wet for him. He found some sort of pride came from that as well because he didn't even need to finger her first. The kissing and love bites had done enough to excite her.
After pulling off his own underwear and kissing her again, he guided his dick in and appreciated the curse word she uttered in the form of a moan.
His first few thrusts were not rushed at all, mostly because he wanted to open her up and get her used to the feeling. But as soon as he thought she was ready, he quickly started to do to her exactly what he was wanting to do the second that dirty laundry room scene popped up in his mind.
"Shit." Zayn mumbled. But it felt so good that she couldn't really complain about it all. She remembered fearing that Harry wouldn't know what he was doing when it came to this. But it was good to know her fears were unwarranted. Harry did know what he was doing. And that made it so much easier for her to follow along and enjoy sex with him.
When he leaned over her and buried his face in her neck, that gave her free reign to pull at his hair and she sort of halfway wrapped her legs around him so that their bodies were pressed against each other. The way that Harry was thrusting into her, so fast yet so carefully, Zayn could tell that he didn't just want to have sex with her because he was in the mood for it. He still really cared about her and wanted this experience to be shared and he wanted her to enjoy it just as much. A man like that always deserved to have her like this. Not necessarily naked, but always intimately.
The rest of what they shared became a blur. It lasted long enough but the way he was steadily pounding into her was just too much to bear and she found herself whispering out his name as she was cumming around him.
Harry didn't stop. He kept the same rhythm he started with until he eventually came inside her. And having Zayn encouraging him to keep going until he finished sort of made him go wild. He liked knowing there were times where Zayn could talk dirty too. And he liked that she wanted him to do something like that inside of her.
Slower and slower, his hips started to move as he finished out his orgasm and he finally came to a complete stop. He pulled out awkwardly. "Are you alright?" He asked between choppy gasps for air.
"But she was too busy giggling and humming and she didn't realize she was just rambling on."I just love you so fucking much, Harry." She hummed, "So much..."
He was in the middle of licking over a red mark he had made earlier when he heard those words and he stopped immediately to look at her. "Uh... you what?" He asked. But even though he knew what she said, his brain was still spinning and he had to be absolutely sure he heard her right.
"Huh?"
His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "You what?" He repeated and he rolled off of her, trying to get his thoughts together. However, that task was difficult to do because his dick was still hard and all his blood and focus was still there as well.
"What do you mean?"
He hesitated at first, not wanting to say the wrong thing. "Ah, you're fucking with my brain, Z." He sat up on his knees and covered his face with his hands but she sat up and pulled them away.
"What? Is something wrong?" But then she had an embarrassing thought come to mind. "Oh no. I was terrible, wasn't I? That was the worse sex you ever had."
Immediately, he started to calm her down before she went in full panic mode. "No, not at all. You were really amazing. But did you not hear what you said?"
"No... What did I say?"
He could tell she was genuinely unaware so he just focused on her flushed cheeks because he was afraid to look her in the eyes. "You said you... loved me."
Zayn slowly exhaled, then put her hand over her chest. "I said that out loud?"
He nodded.
"Oh... Well that uhm-- I-- That was only a thought. It wasn't supposed to be said out loud. It really wasn't." Tears started to well up in her eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
He rubbed her back very softly. "Why are you sorry?"
"Because that was only meant to be a thought in my head. This is terrible."
"Why is it terrible? Telling me you love me isn't a terrible thing. It's a good thing. And it's a good thing that people would like to know."
"But we just slept together. Now you'll probably think I only said it in the moment and end up hating me for it."
"Hey..." He said and he lifted her head up by her chin so that he could see her red and watering eyes. "I would never hate you. I told you that before. So stop thinking like that. Understand me?"
She continued to sniffle and cry though, so he wiped a running tear from her cheek.
"Forget everything else. I just want to know one thing. Even if you didn't mean for it to come out when you said it, did you still mean what you said?"
She nodded. "Yeah, I meant it. It was something I'd been thinking about for a few weeks. You told me to always wait until I was ready so I was waiting for the right moment. But I guess it just slipped out."
"Oh... Yeah... I see." He nodded slowly then turned away from her, staring blankly at the wall. Thoughts were swimming around in his head but he didn't say anything.
Zayn cleared her throat, trying to rid the uncomfortable tension in the air. "You're quiet. Do you not like that I said that?"
He faced her and swallowed hard. "No... no, it's not that."
"Then why are you so quiet?" She asked.
"Because I don't know what to say... exactly. I know what you're expecting and I know what people usually say in response to that but I can't. I'm not even thinking straight so I don't know if I'm truly ready or not and I don't want to just blurt out anything just because you said it. You understand that, right?"
She was quiet but nodded.
"But I want you to know that how I feel shouldn't stop you from saying how you feel. Whenever you feel like saying it, say it. Because I want to hear it. As long as you feel that way, I want to hear it."
"But wouldn't that make you uncomfortable?" She asked.
He shook his head and pulled her toward him so that she was lying near his shoulder and chest. "No, it wouldn't and I can promise you that. Hearing those words come from you would give me the best feeling in the world. And to tell you the truth, I'm kind of eager to hear them again."
That made her smile and she sat up and gave him an innocent look, though he knew just how far from innocence she was. "I love you, Harry." She whispered.
But he put a hand behind his ear. "Wait. What? I couldn't hear you. Can you say it again, this time a little louder?"
Now she was grinning hard at him, still wondering when and if he was ever going to decide to grow up. "I love you Harry! Are you happy now?!"
He smiled with satisfaction and raked his fingers over her messy hair. "I am. Very."
*
*
*
Later that night when they'd finished most of the cleaning around the house, Harry found Zayn standing at the kitchen counter, eating a strawberry pudding cup. Instead of going all the way in, he stood there at the entrance and watched her for a moment, just soaking up how beautiful she looked, especially with her hair pinned up and all tangly due to the shower they had taken when they finally decided to get out of the bed and get themselves cleaned up. He wondered how something even so simple as that could be so breathtaking.
Sometimes when he looked at Zayn, it was hard to believe she belonged to him. He knew that he kissed her almost every single day and he knew that he slept in the same bed with her a lot of nights but it still never seemed real. Often times, it was hard to even fathom the thought. So when she let those three words slip out today, it was no wonder they shocked him so much at first.
However, when he wasn't fresh off an orgasm anymore and when he finally had more than sex on his brain, he was finally able to stop and think about that moment they'd shared. He knew he cared for Zayn. There was no doubt in his mind or heart that he did because he always had. But it wasn't until today that he actually realized the extent to which he did. He didn't just care for her, he was afraid to lose her.
Since the very start of his feelings toward Zayn, it had never been about getting Zayn to love him. That was never a goal of his. All he ever asked was to be wanted by him just once so he could say it happened. They didn't have to be long term. One night would be all he needed of him and then they didn't have to talk to each other about it ever again.
But then today when he saw Zayn doing the laundry and he saw how she was folding both the things he wore as well as her own, he realized he didn't know what he would do if her things no longer started to appear in the wash, if only half the bed was taken up every night. What was he going to do if he didn't have to let the toilet seat up every time he went to pee or if he didn't spend so much time in the store because Zayn would rather compare prices than just grab anything and go? What would he do with all the extra time he'd be saving if he didn't have her to spend it with? What would he being doing now if he wasn't wondering what he'd be doing right now? He didn't have a clue. And strangely enough, he loved the feeling of not knowing the answer to either of those questions.
"Are you standing there watching me?"
"What?" He had just noticed she wasn't facing the counter anymore but had turned around and faced him. "Uh... Yeah, sorry."
"It's alright. I'm not mad." She said, eating a spoonful of the pudding. "Did you want something?"
He put his hands behind his back and walked in the kitchen until he stood directly in front of her. "I just finished putting new sheets and everything on the bed. It's all ready for us."
"Ah, and did you do it right?"
"Yeah. I know how to make a bed, Z."
"Well, that's hard to believe. Last time you did it, the fitted sheet came off in the middle of the night and I had to go behind you and fix it."
He nodded. "True, true. But that won't happen this time because I double checked. Basically the only thing that needs to be fitted is me against you when I spoon you tonight."
She gave him that crinkly nosed smile that he always adored. "You just think you are so smooth, don't you?"
"If I say so myself. And yes, I'm saying that."
She chuckled and he took his hands from behind his back to take her pudding cup and spoon from her hands.
"Wait. What are you doing, Hazza? You can't just take a girl's food like that. Are you crazy?"
"No. I'm not crazy. I just need all of your attention right now."
"What? I gave you enough attention today. That's why we finished cleaning late in the first place."
"I know." He replied and he sat the cup and spoon down on the counter behind her. "But this is really important and it's not just about something I want, okay?"
"Okay..."
He grabbed the sides of her face, then leaned forward, pressing their lips together as if they were in kindergarden and sharing their first kiss. "I love you too." he told her.
She put her hands over his hands and held them a little. She was too shocked to really say much of anything. "What?"
''I know you weren't expecting that but there it is." He smiled. "I love you too."
She shook her head a little. "But I thought you said you weren't ready. That's not something I want you to say because I said it, Harry."
"I know, and it's not."
"Then why did you say it?" She asked and she was starting to get upset because she didn't believe him.
"Because I do." He took his hands from her face. "I do."
"But you said you were not ready. How are you all of a sudden ready five hours later?"
"Because it's not all of a sudden. I was dead wrong earlier."
"Wrong? How? You're confusing me, Harry."
"I know and I'm not trying to confuse you." He tried to speak comfortingly. "It's just that today... When I was finally able to pause and think about what happened, I saw things differently. I literally saw you in every facet of my life and wondered what I would even be without you in them."
"Don't exaggerate. You'd be every thing you were at first." She spoke quietly.
"And what is that? A coward to my own feelings? I don't want that. I like being in a relationship with the person I care about most. I like knowing that when I need something, you are always there and willing to give it to me. And I like spending every second of every day doing things that will please you. Lately, all I want to do is hold you and take care of you and protect you. I just want you safe and at the end of the day, I always want you here. And I don't just mean here in the house but right next to me. If that isn't love. I don't know what else it could be, Z."
She sighed. "But when you said you weren't ready, I assumed it was because you thought five months wasn't long enough. Well I'm telling you now, if you're secretly thinking it's too early to return any emotions like that, I'm okay with that. I understand and I won't rush you."
He shook his head. "See, that's the problem. We're worried about time but how we feel shouldn't be measured by time. Me and you-- We're special because even though we've dated for a short while, we have eleven years worth of time with each other. You know me inside and out, I know you inside and out and that's all that matters. So I think it's okay to tell you that I love you and that I don't want to not love you. I think it's totally okay. I also believe that any moment is the right moment as long as that's what you feel. And that's what I feel for you. Honestly... I just hope that you trust my reasons for returning it so soon."
He took both of her hands in his and gradually gave her a huge smile that in its own weird way, started to make her grow calm. Just by looking into his eyes, she could tell how sincere he was and thinking of it made her wonder if his future was one of the "facets" of his life that he saw her in. If so, what was it like? How did she fit in it? She was curious to know but at the same time, also a little bit afraid to know.
"I do trust you and I'm more than okay with that. But I don't know where this takes us now. Are we going to be stuck here?"
He paused to think. "I don't know and I can't tell you anything about the future. But what I can tell you is that everything will all come in time. For now, we should just focus on what is most important. Nothing else."
"And what's most important?"
"Each other."
She nodded her head in agreement, then maneuvered her hands to intertwine their fingers. "So its settled then. We love each other."
"Yep." he said , then he suddenly started giggling and bouncing like that kindergardener again. "I don't know about you, but I just got butterflies in my stomach when you said that. Did you get those too?"
"I don't know. I always get butterflies when I'm around you. So I wouldn't even know the difference."
He was surprised at how easily and effortless that had come out. "Wow... Was that taken from one of the lines you used to pick up girls with or was that especially made for Harry?"
"Oh, come on. You know it couldn't have been for anybody but you. I'm head over heels for you. Remember?"
"Yes. I do remember. But you should be careful. Being head over heels sounds a bit dangerous and I don't want you to get hurt."
"Uh oh. Is that something I should be dreading to come? Are you saying that I might get hurt?"
It didn't take him long to respond and clear that up right away. "Nah, it was just a joke. You don't have to worry. I'm not going to hurt you."
With that, he dipped down and met his lips with hers, engaging her in a loving kiss. She knew then that she wouldn't have to worry. Everything was going to be just fine.