5:40 PM There is only one way to get out of fishing. It involves divulging things that are better off not divulged. I shall resign myself to the inevitable while vowing to keep an eye out for the bright side.
BTW, when my dad found out Madison and I were going fishing, he went all misty on me and offered the following advice:
a. Long pants (I am not wasting a leg shaving, sorry.)
b. Long sleeves (It's 94 degrees outside; is he kidding?)
c. Bug spray (Stinky.)
d. Cheese Bait (Also stinky.)
I remembered the vile cheese bait stuff from weekends at the lake. I told Madison 'NO! NO!' but she said, "If there must be bait, it will be vegetarian bait." So we toted the little jar of nastiness with us and left all the really useful stuff behind.
I was getting out of Dad's car and cracking a joke about hooking the big one when Brady shushed me for the first time that evening. He turned to me and crouched his knees a bit. He pushed his hands up and down in the air and his body kind of bounced along. I was still trying to figure out what this sort of greeting meant when he rolled his eyes and let out a long, "SHHHHHHHHH!" I'd never heard a person be so loud when trying to make someone else be quiet.
He did it in front of Madison, Craig, Kiersten, Dave, and especially J-a-a-y-cob. That made me feel sangry, sort of sad and angry at the same time.
I decided to be cool for my friends' sakes, so I shushed on the outside, but on the inside I was screaming. I mean, lately Brady seems like he's always trying to make me quieter, still-er, more normal. It's like he wants to fit me into some kind of better girlfriend box. Who wouldn't want to yell?
But I didn't. I shushed.
We baited our hooks and stood by the creek's bank. That was fun for about five minutes. Then the mosquitoes started biting. I figured I was less likely to be eaten alive if I was a moving target. I laid down my pole, pulled out my phone, and started taking pictures.
Craig, Dave and Kiersten mugged for the camera. Brady (and even Jacob) looked handsome and manly with their pants tucked into their boots and their caps turned backward. The sun gave everything a beautiful orange-golden glow that made the world seem especially hopeful. There was one shot that reminded me how different things can look through a camera lens, how it can bring more than a picture into focus:
Madison had stuck her finger with a hook. She let loose a swear word and Jacob rushed over. He took her finger and squeezed out a drop of blood. He was explaining the importance of washing the wound when I snapped the photo.
Don't get me wrong, I still hate Jacob. But for a moment, I could see why Madison doesn't.
It didn't last long. "Are we fishing or what?" he said.
Jacob and Brady baited their hooks again. Kiersten followed their lead. The rest of us opted for 'or what'.
I practiced a few back handsprings while Madison tried to teach Dave and Craig to do cartwheels. We laughed some more and Brady shushed us (all of us) again. And again. Okay. We could do quiet.
We chased fireflies and Dave and Craig painted their faces with the phosphorescent guts. We played freeze tag. We were in the middle of a complicated game/dance of Crack the Whip when Jacob hissed, "Fish can sense movement too." I swear he made that up.
About that time I noticed the sky had changed from gold to periwinkle and was working its way to a deep, velvet blue. Madison and Dave had already missed the magic star-popping time but I hoped the Secret Plan could still be salvaged. I pulled on Dave's sleeve and pointed to the sky. He gave me the 'huh?' motion so I pointed at Madison, and I pointed at him, and then up to the sky. He still looked confused. I pointed at each of them one more time, then wrapped my arms around myself and gave myself a little hug.
Aha. He got it. But he shook his head 'no'. I shook my head 'yes'. Firmly. Dave shrugged in response.
I pantomimed him leaving, then looked at my wrist (where if I was responsible I'd wear a watch, but I'm not, so I don't). I tapped off a few seconds then pointed back to Madison and hooked my thumb. Translation: You leave. I'll wait five minutes then get Madison to leave too.
He shrugged his shoulders again but a couple of minutes later he said, "I hate to go while the fish are still, er, not biting but ..." We all said our good-byes and Dave headed up the hill in the direction of the park.
It seemed like forever while I counted in my head: one-one thousand, two-one thousand ... until I made it up to three hundred - one thousand. I faked a yawn and said, "I-I'm kind of tired. C'mon, Madison, let's go."
"I want to stay here a while," she said. "You don't mind walking home alone, do you?"
I don't mind? I'd stayed up half the night talking to Dave, arranging things so that she could finally escape the evil clutches of Jacob. I'd spent most of my day rearranging it all – just for her. Heck yes, I minded. But then I thought about the heat, the stinky cheese bait and the bug bites. Maybe the combination had caused Madison to have some kind of mini-stroke. Maybe she'd forgotten all about Dave Brown.
"Didn't you say you had that thing to do?" I asked.
"What thing?" she said, while Jacob tried to attach himself to her neck.
"That thing," I said (sotto voce) and I knew she understood. But she pretended she didn't. I tried to come up with something to get her back on track after that. Each time I opened my mouth to speak though, Madison opened her eyes wider. I knew if I kept it up one of us would end up either shouting or crying. How was that going to help the situation?
I couldn't stay because I'd just lied about being tired. But I couldn't get Madison to go, and that was the whole reason for leaving. Plus, someone had to explain to Dave that he was being stood up.
"Craig?" I said, "Walk me home?"
He looked at me, then up the hill. He scratched his head. He scratched his calf. He frowned for a second, then sighed. "I think I'm going to try a little more fishing," he answered finally.
Betrayed. By my own kind. Oh well, once you practice to deceive ... how's that thing go again?
I gave Brady a good-bye hug while Madison used my phone to snap a picture. "For the record," she said.
***
Even though I like taking pictures, I don't especially care to be in them. I grabbed my phone from Madison and started making my way up to the park. While I walked, I tried to figure out how to put a good spin on the situation. What could I say to Dave that would convince him to continue 'girding up his loins'.
My mind was so blank that I didn't even notice Dave sprawled on the grass, staring up at the stars, until I almost tripped over him. "Hey," I said.
"She's not coming, is she?"
I sat on the ground beside him and shook my head. "I just don't get it. She could have Jacob, or she could have ... you."
"Oh yeah, tough choice," he answered. "Because we all know I'm the big prize in the Cracker Jack box."
But you are, Dave. You are, I wanted to say. And then, even though it felt uncomfortable, I tried to tell him what makes him such a terrific guy, like the way a girl feels okay to be just whoever she is around him. Maybe that made him feel uncomfortable too because he stopped me and shushed me and pointed up to the stars.
"See that one?" he said.
"Which?" I moved closer and followed where his finger pointed. "The blue one?"
"Yeah. That's Vega. It's part of the constellation Lyra, the lyre. Did you know the first lyre was made from a turtle shell? The Greek god, Apollo, gave it to his son and taught him to play it so beautifully that he could soothe the savage beast."
"So that's where that comes from?"
"What?"
Then I really felt uncomfortable but I told him how much I adore words and terms and phrases like 'soothe the savage beast'. I let my hair fall over my face when I said it but, when I glanced out at Dave through the strands, he didn't look at me like I was strange -- not like Brady would have. Instead he smiled, leaned back on his elbows and said maybe I should be a writer. We talked about all kinds of things after that. Important things, secret things, things I haven't even told Madison.
I don't know what time it was when we finally got up to leave. Late, for sure. Probably past my curfew. But even though I knew I might be in trouble, I couldn't seem to force my feet to walk away. We stood there, with the night breeze blowing around us and the stars twinkling above, neither of us saying a word.
And it felt weird. But right.
Dave reached down to pluck a dandelion from the grass. When he stood again, he slipped it behind my ear. I started to say something then, to remind him that ... that ... but he traced the outline of my lips with his fingertip and whispered, "Shhhhhhhh."
And it was like that magical lyre music to me. It soothed my savage beast. I closed my eyes and laid my head against his chest. I let my arms follow their own will. They snaked around his waist and came to rest against his back.
Somewhere deep inside of me, a little voice whispered, "This is Dave Brown," but I told it to shush, and pretty soon all I could hear was the wind through the trees and the frogs by the lake. All I could feel was the tide of our bodies as they found each other's rhythm, breathing in and out.
That is, until the phone in my pocket buzzed.
"Where are you?" Madison sounded frantic. "I stopped at your house but Tim said you weren't home. You left the creek hours ago."
"I'm with ... I was just ..." Dave's breath was warm against my forehead. I took a step back. "I'm on my ..."
"What? What? Your stupid phone is breaking up. Anyway, if you can hear me, your mom is asleep on the couch. You'd better be quiet if you don't want to get grounded."
I turned off the phone and inspected my shoes. "It's late," I said.
"I'll walk you home."
Suddenly, walking with Dave, talking with Dave, doing anything with Dave didn't seem like such a good idea. I touched the phone to his chest and shook my head.
"I'll call you," he said.
I kept my eyes on my sneakers. "Don't." I turned to leave. I'd only taken a few steps when I stopped and looked back at him. He hadn't moved an inch. "Dave?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm sorry. Tonight was ..." I think I'd meant to say 'an accident' but the words got caught in my throat.
Dave drew in a breath and let it leak back out. "Summer," he said. "Tonight was anything you want it to be." That's when the possibilities of it overwhelmed me. And I ran.
Wednesday, June 18 1:43 A.M.
Term of the Day: Matins – Prayers said between midnight and four in the morning.
Someone say some matins for me.
Things I Love:
?
Things I Hate:
?
<3
Author Note: So, a funny thing happened when I went back to my regular schedule of publishing two chapters a week ... I missed you guys. I still can't promise that I will post more than that. I have a job. And a Christmas tree to decorate. And gifts to buy and wrap. And parties to attend :) But I pinky swear that I will be back on Friday with at least one more chapter.