I wish I could see the future, and then maybe I wouldn't have gone to that party. No one should have to go through what I went through. This party is going to turn my life upside down. I hate High school. I had plans for after high school. Who could know that one party would turn it all around?
***
We were on our way to the party. I told my mom that I'd be staying the night at Cloe's and Cloe told her mom that she'd be at mine, so we were covered. I decided that we should walk. Dedrick's house wasn't too far from mine. We arrived at his house about an hour after the party started. Full in costume, no one questioned us. They stared a bit, but once they noticed us, they went back to the party. Cloe and I walked around to get a feel of the house and party. It was a huge house. I mean the living room alone was at least 30' by 30'. It was huge and beautiful. Once we got a feel of the place, we split up to mingle. She went to talk to the cheerleaders. I just stood by the kitchen entrance and watched people.
"Hey." I heard someone say. I looked around. I wasn't sure that they were talking to me, but he walked closer. "Hey," he said again.
"Umm. Hello."
"Enjoying the party?"
Obviously not. I'm standing in one spot, watching people. "I assumed that much was obvious." I say sarcastically.
"Yeah, why don't you have a drink? I'll get you one if you want."
I looked at him for a minute, trying to see if I knew him. He had a mask on. All I could see was his eyes and his mouth; his beautiful eyes and his soft lips. They looked familiar, but I couldn’t put a face to them. All I could do was stare. I didn't realize how long I was staring.
"Well?" He said with confusion. I'm sure it was awkward for him.
"Sure." I didn't really want a drink, but if I said no, he might have questioned me. Why would I go to a party if I wasn't going to drink and enjoy it?
"Ok. I'll be right back with that drink," he clicked and made a gun with his fingers. He laughed which made me laugh.
I just wanted the awkwardness to end. He left and I took a deep breath and sighed. Please don't come back, I thought. I stood there for what seemed like an hour. I didn't think he was coming back. Thank god. As soon as I thought that, he popped back up.
"Here," he extended his hand and in it: a beer.
"Thanks." I said grabbing it. I sipped it and almost spit it out. I didn't want to embarrass myself, so I choked it down. He looked at me as if he knew I didn't want it.
"So why did you come to this party?"
I knew that was coming. "My friend dragged me along." I lied.
"Oh, where is your friend?"
I pointed to her. She was across the room laughing with the cheerleaders. I wish I could hear what they were saying. He glanced over to her and then looked at me.
"Well, it looks like you're having fun, and I have to go mingle. I won't be gone to long, so don't have too much fun." He said trying not to laugh.
"Oh, yeah. I'll totally try not to do that." I said with sarcasm. I laughed at what he said. He smiled and waved as he went to talk to other people.
Who was that? Not too long after he left another guy came up to me.
"Heey." He said trying to sound cool.
"Hello."
"Whatchya doin?"
"Standing here." I said confused. "Duh."
"Whoa. Sorry." He said putting up his hands. "Well, you wanna go somewhere?" He said with a wink.
"No, I'll pass." I said disgusted.
"Fine then bitch." He stomped off.
I was hoping that would be the end of the random guys talking to me. I was still standing there awkwardly, still standing it the same spot. I leaned against the wall. I looked down at the beer in my hands and took a swig. This time it didn't taste as bad. I could get used to this. I took another drink, and again, not that bad. I drank like half of it before I realized the dick that called me a bitch was standing in front of me.
"What do you want this time?" I snapped. Whoa, did I just snap at him. I noticed that he was surprised, but I held my ground. I'm not going to let him push me around.
"Nothing, just wanted to know if you wanted another drink?"
"Uh, no," I look at my drink and take a sip, "I'm good for now." I said nicely and walked away. He's kind of creepy. I explored the house by myself this time. I wanted to go talk to Cloe, but it looked like she was having a good time laughing with the cheerleaders. I didn't want her to think I was being a "party-pooper." I noticed she took her mask off. I shrugged it off. I finished my beer and grabbed two more; I continued walking around while drinking one of the beers I grabbed. By the time I finished the first beer, I found myself outside under a beautiful gazebo. I was alone. It was framed with Christmas lights and vines. It reminded me of a movie. I giggled at the thought of it.
"What are you laughing at?" A familiar voice asked.
I swear I jumped ten feet high. I quickly turned around. I could feel my heart beating like crazy. Not because we were standing in a romantic gazebo, but because he scared the living shit out of me.
"This gazebo reminds me of a movie." I stutter trying to calm down.
"That was my mom's plan," he says with a smile. "I told you I'd come back. When I walked to the kitchen, I noticed that something was missing. The beautiful girl in the door way was gone."
I blushed and looked away. I was afraid he would see my super red face. I don't even know who he is. I felt a touch on my chin. He was touching me. He lifted my face, forcing me to look into his gorgeous, familiar eyes. This is getting more and more like a movie.
I stared into his eyes for a while before I was able to squeeze out a sentence. "You don't know me, how can you say I'm beautiful?"
"Do I need to, just to say how beautiful you are? Especially in this lighting," he says almost in a whisper. "I'd love to see your whole face," he says reaching for my mask.
I pulled away. I didn't want him to find out who I was. What if he goes to my school? He's got to be one of the older, popular kids. He was talking to just about everyone at the party like he knew them. If he saw who I was, he might not think I'm so beautiful anymore.
"Sorry," he says disappointed. "I've never seen you up close before. I just thought now would be a good time." He sounded apologetic. He took a few steps back.
WHAT!? He knows who I am?! But how? Maybe I just misread what he said.
"Do you ... know who I am?" I say confused.
He looks at me with a smirk, "Of course I do. I recognized Cloe when you stepped in, and you are always by her side." He walked a little closer to me.
Oh my gosh. I can't believe that he recognized us. I'm not that surprised that he recognized Cloe; she's Emry's sister. If she wasn't friends with me, she'd be popular by now because all of the cheerleaders would treat her like their sister. Which I believe has begun.
"Who are you?"
"You mean you don't know?" He says a little surprised. "Then we'll leave it that way." He smirked and walked up to me. He reached for my mask again, but paused just before touching it. "Can I?" He says in a whisper.
I look into his eyes. I don't care who he is right now. All I know is that his eyes are enticing and that he thinks I'm beautiful. I felt the sudden urge to kiss him, but I fought it off. I nod slightly. He slides it off my face. I close my eyes and when I open them, he's gone. Did I just imagine all of that? I thought for a moment. I looked down at my beer and took a swig. I touch my face. My mask, it’s gone.
"You're more beautiful without it."
I turn around. I didn't imagine it. It did happen. Then why would he disappear? I looked at him then to the seat behind him where my mask sat.
I just noticed what he said and blushed. "Says you."
He steps closer to me and tucks some stray hairs behind my ears. He lifts my head again, forcing our eyes to lock.
"You look so beautiful," he whispers, breaking the silence.
I blush. I felt the urge to kiss him again. I looked away. No, you don't even know him and, yet somehow he knows you. You don't do this kind of stuff, but the situation seems right. Stop trying to convince yourself to... My thoughts were interrupted when he lifted my head again. Once again we locked eyes. Why does he keep doing this? I noticed that this time he glanced a few times at my lips. Oh my gosh. He wants to kiss me. Well why doesn't he? Maybe he wants me to make the move; to make sure I'm ok with it. When my mind stopped rambling, I realized what was happening. I took a step back.
"I shouldn't..." I paused finding no reason to explain; I turned around and started to go back to the party.
"Wait," he called out.
I turned around to see him holding out my mask.
"You might want this," he smirked
"Thanks," I blushed
I put my mask back on and waved at him as I headed back to the party. Once I got back inside, I chugged my beer. I went to go get another one, but I was interrupted.
"I wanted to apologize for the way I acted earlier. I do that when I drink."
It was the dick from earlier.
"Um, ok. No worries." I said trying to get out of this conversation.
"I noticed that you were on your way to get a drink. I needed a reason to talk to you to apologize, so I brought you one." He held out a cup of beer.
"Thanks, I guess." I grabbed the beer and walked away.
That was weird. For some reason, I was a little scared. I chugged the beer, trying to forget what happened at the gazebo. I was walking back to the kitchen, when I remembered that the mystery guy might look for me there. I decided to go sit in the living room. I found an empty chair, which was amazing. I sat down and went to go take a drink, but it was empty. I wanted to go get another one, but didn't want to run into that dick again. I sat there for a few minutes watching people stumble around the living room. I saw a few couples head up stairs. Several couples were making out against the fireplace. Gross. In desperation to get out of the "make-out" room, I headed to get another beer. I stood up and felt a little dizzy, but I shrugged it off thinking that it was just the beer. I stumbled a bit, but didn't fall. I still wanted another beer. I was half way there, when everything started to get blurry. I felt someone staring at me. I leaned up against the wall and tried to regain my balance. What's happening? Does beer do this? I hate beer. I stood up and walked a little more. Everything is so hazy. I stumbled to the stairs and used the rail to hold myself up. I look around. I could feel someone glaring at me, watching my every movement. I couldn't find any one that was focusing on me. I made an attempt to go back outside. I let go of the rail, take one step, and fall. Someone caught me. Mystery guy? I heard myself think.
"It's okay. I've got you."
He sounded to evil. Was this the one who was watching me? I felt so sick. I couldn't think strait. I couldn't see. Everything went black. I tried to focus on what I was feeling. He slung my arm around him and dragged me upstairs. No, please no. I tried to say, but once I opened my mouth nothing, not even a sound, would come out. He continued to drag me up stairs and into a room. I heard the door slam. I started to panic. I tried to leave; I tried to struggle, but I couldn't move. All I could do was listen. He threw me on the bed and adjusted me to his liking. I heard a zip.
"Teach you to say no to me." I heard him mumble as his pants ruffled and hit the ground.
I felt tears run down my face. I can cry, but I can't move. Why? Please just let me go. Don't do this! I tried to say, but this time I just heard mumbles and sounds, no words would form.
"Shut up." He snapped. He straddled me and lifted up my dress. I could feel myself trying to scream. He ripped my panties off. I felt him lean over and kissed my hip. I tried to struggle again. Why can't I move? Beer doesn't do this, I thought. I managed to move my arm and push my dress down.
"Oh hell no!" He snatched my arm and threw it to the side and pushed my dress back up. I felt him touch me.
I could feel the tears stream down my face. Please, stop. Then he shoved himself inside me. I felt the pain. It was agonizing. It felt like he ripped my arm off. He contiued, back and forth. It hurt. I just wanted it to stop. I eventually passed out from all the pain.
When I woke up, he was gone. My entire body, including my head, was under the covers. Did I pass out from the beer? I pushed the covers out of the way and looked down. A puddle of blood painted the sheets. I almost screamed, but I stopped myself. I didn’t know what happened and I didn’t want anyone to see this. I tried to get out of bed, but my legs felt useless. I ended up falling on the floor. That’s when I notice the pain between my legs. I gasped and lifted my dress. My underwear was gone; my inner thighs were stained with blood. I quickly covered myself. I ran through the images in my mind, trying to figure out what happened. An image of a man on top of me popped into my mind. I began to cry. I looked around the room threw my tears. I tried to stand again. I stumbled a bit, but managed to keep my balance. I fixed the bed, covering the blood. I looked around once more. I noticed a bathroom. I've got to get myself clean. I walked in the bathroom. I checked to make sure there was a towel. I shut the door and locked it. I slipped off my dress, took off the mask, and threw them on the floor. I turned on the water, waited for it to steam, turned on the shower, and stepped inside. I sat on the tub floor for a while, crying, trying to understand why someone would do this to me. I grabbed the rag and angrily scrubbed the blood of my thighs. I got out the shower and tried to compose myself, like this never happened. I got dressed and put my mask back on. I headed down stairs to find a bunch of people passed out everywhere. I looked around for Cloe, but she was gone. I checked my phone and I had a text from Cloe. It was filled with spelling errors. I assumed she was drunk when she texted me
“Hey I wnt hone. I nottced you weer wiht a gy, soo i lft hpe u had fun c uat scool :)”
I left the house and started walking home, crying the whole way there. Once I got to my door. I wiped the tears away and tried to hide the fact that I was crying. I walked in. The house was quiet. Mom was at work. I sighed and started to cry again. I ran up to my room and locked the door. I sat in the corner by my bed and held myself. I cried for hours. I grabbed the blanket off my bed and covered myself. I continued to cry until I passed out.