Mikaela's Point Of View
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🅙🅤🅛🅨 ❶❾, ❷⓿❷❺
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⠀⠀Dear Yuu-chan, it has been a slow ten years, hasn't it? Well, at least it has been for me. Throughout those many years, though, I haven't forgotten you. I haven't and never will forget the love of my life. I promise you, Yuu-chan, I have changed my psychotic ways and am finally acting like a normal human being. I went to a doctor whom I've been trying very hard with, and now I've done it.
I don't know if you'll come back to me. Somehow, after the long years of curing myself and waiting to get out of this Hell, I came to think about the reality of things and it most likely comes to the point that you won't return. God, I'm so stupid to think that after ten years you'd remember me or even worse, not forgive me. I've been completely stuck on the thought since ever. Many things have changed, but for one thing that hasn't is my unconditional love for you. I will always love you even if you don't return the gesture. God, I love you so much— it hurts.
⠀⠀Please forgive me, Yuu-chan
⠀⠀⠀—⠀Mikaela
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I had just gotten out of prison that fine afternoon, myself scrambling to write the one note to Yuichiro, though I was sure he would never read it, care for it, nor would we ever again meet. Even if we had, I knew he would not forgive me for my horrible actions. After all, I did more than just the common kidnapping; I included torture ( physically and mentally ), suffering, murder— and for what?
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I didn't even understand it myself, really.
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Walking out the double doors, I found myself greeting a new living; freedom, sunlight that didn't just look like the same shining star as before, but more beautiful, and the beginning of a modified me. The skies were much bluer than I remembered it being, more clouds stretched the skies like cotton balls and I couldn't help but chuckle. It really did bring back memories. Good ones, the ones where I was with Yuichiro; where I was my normal, cheerful self.
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Memories came flooding back of Yuichiro and I grazing at the clouds as we sprawled out upon the green grasses, careless of the itchiness it sent, gaze set on only what we could imagine was painted in the cobalt atmosphere. Yuichiro always saw something cute and positive, just like his little self, things like flowers, hearts, puppies, and once in a while he'd state he saw me. He'd point in the direction in which he saw and I'd only laugh, seeing nothing. Perhaps it was just the raven being adorable.
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Then, a sudden pain rushed over me, hand reaching to hold at my chest. And suddenly, I began to wonder, "What have I done?"
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There was no one to blame for the past's mistakes, but I, Mikaela Shindo. I thought over and over about what have I done and what could have possibly been so horrible it drove me to madness far worse than expected, so horrible it took Yoichi's life away, so horrible it risked the life of Yuichiro, his lover and the last person he'd want to hurt.
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I recalled the agony that he weakly showed within those iridescent, emerald irises of his along with the hopeless cries of help's, stop's, and it-hurt's. Yuichiro looked so pathetic underneath my hold like the prey of a wolf's. I love him so goddamn much, I told myself as I stopped in the middle of the busy sidewalks, and yet I did that to him. Random people passed by, some sharing confused or irritated faces toward my likeliness at stopping in the center of a dense area, though I didn't care.
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By then, tears brimmed the glassy barriers of my eyes and I held a hand over my lips. I did what I could not to start sobbing like a maniac with all the people whom roamed here, and so I turned around to walk away, somewhere more spacious and private until I've collected myself.
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Little did I know, I was going faster than I thought I was.
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"I'm sorry, Yuu-chan!" I mumbled beneath my own breath. "I'm so sorry!"
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"I love you so much, Yuu-chan."
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"I've changed, Yuu-chan."
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"Please," I whispered. "Come back to me."
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It was far more less crowded than beyond the other street and sidewalks, less and less people dropping things and bumping into each other's shoulders that I slowed my pace, coming into contact with an all-too familiar café. I remember this, I thought, it's where Yuu-chan used to work. I knew better than to walk in just to have another breakdown, but it was far much better than in public, and it wasn't like the certain dark-haired male still worked here, right?
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The reason I spoke to myself was reason enough and I walked through the doors, winds rushing into my eyes whilst nipping at my cheeks. Like always, it smelled like cocoa beans, pastries, lavender, and, well, Yuichiro. It brought back so much, I almost couldn't handle that I was sitting in the one booth I always did.
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It should've felt the same, yet it didn't.
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It felt rusty, useless, and uncomfortable— far from what I wanted.
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But I stayed put, shoving my eyelids into the palm of hands as the unwanted tears came trickling out, and I strained to keep the sobs that erupted from my chest as silent as possible. It was painful just thinking about Yuichiro. How he would never return. How he would never be forgiven. How he would have just lost his first love so simply and horribly. There were no goodbyes that day long ago, so there wasn't much of a closure.
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Suddenly, a tapping upon my shoulder created my reflexes to sharpen, and I whipped my head up, prepared to snap at the person who dared to interrupt. I held the best expression of frustration and intimidation I could create, eyebrows furrowed, teeth gritted and such—
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But I did no such thing.
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A male just about my age; black hair, extremely large, sweet eyes, and the most adorable smile I've ever experienced; stood there, a notepad in his hands along with a pen. He didn't seem to have acknowledged the fact that I was the culprit of the crime he was apart of, not even once losing his sunshine as he looked at me.
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It felt like a dream... Yuu-chan being here.
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"Hi there, Sir!" He greeted cheerfully. "Are you okay? Do you need a tissue?"
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At that, he began to frantically dig into the pockets of his apron, tongue sticking out from among his maw as he tried to claim and retrieve a tissue, though I stopped him with the shaking of my head. "If you say so," he took a deep breath, "what would you like to order?"
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I couldn't speak. My lips wouldn't allow it.
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"Sir?"
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The words seemed to be stuck within my throat.
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"S-Sir?
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Then they finally spilled.
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"A tall glass of you."
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A comfortable silence filled the small space in between us, the raven's eyes sparkling for the merest second before his lips curled more upward and a giggle escaped. It was a gorgeous sound that I haven't heard for the last ten years, and I strained my ears to record the sound, fearful that I would never hear it again. The waiter wiped a tear from his eyes, huffing at how hard he laughed. "I'm working right now, but you'll definitely get that. How about after my shift ends we go get some dinner?"
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I couldn't believe my ears. I was sure that no such thing would be happening; nothing as special and surprising as this. Didn't he remember? Remember all the horrible things I did to him? I mentally tried to deny the fact he was actually trying to be nice, replacing it with a, "He's just doing his job at being polite with his customers," and yet, I said the words:
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"I'd like that."
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The male clicked his pen away, turning to walk away, but becoming frozen midway. I stared at him in confusion. He whipped his head back to look at me, a smile playing his chubby cheeks. "Oh, and my name is Yuichiro. But you can call me Yuu for short. Nice to meet you!"
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I slowly nodded. "Mikaela, but Mika's fine."
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Yuichiro sent a cheesy grin along with a failure of a wink before he jogged along to a different table to resume his work. It wasn't until he vanished from sight that I realized what he was doing. He was brave and kind; it's what I fell in love about him, after all. I sighed quietly whilst staring starry-eyed out of the window, distress and tears long forgotten and replaced with feeling of relief.
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Yuichiro was giving me another chance at love.
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Epilogue.
And that concludes this fanfic.
Yeah, this sucked, but I just wanted to have somewhat a happy ending and some kind of humor ( though that didn't really work out )
Maybe I'll edit this, too idk
Anyway, if you enjoyed this and would like more Mikayuu, I just published my new fanfic; "Faded Memories"
THANK YOU ALL WHO HAVE READ THIS, IT MAKES ME CRY HOW NICE YOU ALL ARE
THANK YOU OH GOSH <3
— Scarlet
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