"Ladies and jerks, don't just dance on her grave. Piss on it. Help the grass grow."
Faith yanked the microphone from my hands. "That's no way to talk about my grandmother! She founded Villain Academy-Hey lady! Give it back!"
"She's dead and useless like the bullshit you just shoved up two thousand assholes." I tossed her the microphone and jumped onto the lunch table.
"You imbecile!" Faith screamed in my direction.
Faith: A sinful vampire who breathes in floral dresses, cherry glossed lips and plots the death of me.
AKA-vomit material.
"What do you think you're-Oomph!"
I stuffed a finger sandwich in her mouth. "Villains like me are allergic to emotional, nice bitches like you," I stated and took the gum out of my mouth before sticking it on her nose.
Hells Bells, the bottom of someone's shoe would've made that gum look more appetizing than on her face.
"Now!"-I turned-"Fellow clique-y, judgmental classmates built on hypocrisy and high school status!" I held the gaze of the supernatural school with a wicked smile. "Seniors, juniors, sophomores and freshmeat-it's a pleasure to see your ugly faces again."
I kicked aside a lunch tray and paraded across the table. "Listen up. You're all going to die. I don't know when, I don't know how, but it could possibly be from Faith's advice about being successful students and having a--hold on, I think I'm going to throw up in my mouth---an education."
"You mean we don't have to be here?" shouted a classmate I once had. I don't know their name, but he's that one kid who can roast someone at any time. Great guy. Bad haircut.
"No. But you all want to be here. This is Villain Academy, where your bad selves can roam free and make nightmares come true. Now let me give you real touching, heartwarming back-to-school speech. 'Cause you don't wanna hear about Faith's dead grandma, right?"
The Zombies moaned from their table and I lifted an apologetic hand. "Except you rotting shitheads. But the rest of you aspiring villains don't want to learn 'bout our school's story."
Forks and knives pounded against plates and their excitement pulled a smile out of me.
"Here's the truth that I've learned from the four years that I've rotted here. High school is a bitch: brutal violence, angsty adolescent drama and a possible chance of you murdering the next Gossip Girl or "A". Your name will end up on the bathroom stall next to words that I won't say. You'll hold a gun, get bullied, be the bully. Freshmeat, you won't survive a week and seniors, let's make this a killer year." I cracked a grin. "Welcome to Villain Academy, spineless bitches."
A storm of applause shook the tables, a smile striking down my lips.
"You," Faith growled. But outside the skies cheered, thunder rolling on the clouds in laughter, lightning dancing around the school.
I plucked the gum off her nose and popped it back in my mouth. "Uh oh"-I chewed-"Cue the control freak."
Her fists shook by her side. "You ruin everything! Nothing disgusts me more than a pink haired punk squeezed in plastic," she snarled.
I hopped off the table and poked her forehead. "And you need a luxury trip to Satan's chambers, muffin. A profanity-free mouth, no thirst for blood, like, you're so goddamn nice. How do you do it?" My smile forced their thin brows to narrow.
Yeah. I mentally insulted their brows.
Throwing shade in the first chapter. Savage--I know.
Her teeth clenched, and I squinted down on her. "Hells Bells-wait-a-hellish-minute! You're the Faith!" My eyes lit up. "Do ya remember me? Junior prom-the one who crashed it and burned the gym to the ground? I was the psychotic bitch who put a gun to your head!"
Her eyes bulged, and I casually laughed. "Nah, don't worry. I'ma classy bitch now. Stupid pranks are so last fear season." I snapped my fingers. "But I think I did sleep with your date!"
Her face baked to an embarrassing red and we both turned towards the sound of wince.
Faith's boyfriend took one big stride in the opposite direction but Faith clasped a steel grip on his arm. "You slept with that sleazy villain?!"
Colour drained out of his face. "Oops. The black cat's outta the bag," I chimed. I slapped both hands on my cheeks and mocked a pleading voice. "But darling! It's not what you think!" My face twisted into the work of the devil. "Don'tcha worry, dollface. I haven't snogged him since."
She shoved her boyfriend's guilty face down and jerked her head to me. "I've heard things about you!"
Silence hung over the cafeteria, rotten lunches halting in front of open mouths.
"They say you're a witch," she rambled. "Or was it a bitch?" Vampire red ink seeped into her blue eyes, fangs growing out of her teeth. "Why don't you bippity boppity boo out of this one?"
I grabbed a rotten apple out of a freshmeat's hand and took a nasty bite. "Oh, please. A witch? I screw dicks, not brooms."
The Witches screeched and their chair legs abruptly scraped back. Juice dribbled down my chin as I sighed. "Gag on a chill pill, ladies." My eyes rolled back to Faith.
"What are you then?" She circled around me, her nails sharpening into claws. "A ghoul? Mummy? Banshee?"
I pretended to zip my lips and instead of tossing the key, I chucked the apple behind me and heard a thunk of a body slumping to the floor. "You ain't worthy of unsewing my lips, sugar."
Her nose scrunched up. "Are you a Hero?"
Students leaned in, eyes snooping at the mention of our Academy's buried mystery.
I laughed. "That urban legend? I'm no myth. I'm a god damn villain like the rest of you freaks. What my origins are is none of your damn business, ya little angel."
An exaggerated gasp left her lips, and her boyfriend put an arm over her. "Call her that again and-"
"Toss me a white dress and send me to heaven? Baby, you'd mind as well slap me with your halo because you're no better than a saint," I said.
His eyes glowed, throat rumbling a deep growl. His neck jerked and cracked as human skin stretched over grinding bones, pulling back to reveal dark brown fur: a teen wolf, how original-am I right, folks?
"And enter the protective boyfriend," I sang. The bubble gum snapped in my mouth. "So whatdaya gonna do? Hit me, Wolfie? Rawr."
"Sock him where the full moon doesn't shine!" a squeaky voice chanted.
I peeked over the werewolf's shoulder and groaned. "Roger! The Headmistress strictly told ya not come in the cafeteria! Hells Bells-you make it fucking impossible to look after you!"
Crumbs rolled down the grade nine's mayonnaise stained shirt as he hugged his sandwich to his chest. "The hunchback lunch lady told me there's a new sandwich bar in here! You can't deny free food! Food is a blessing!"
I grabbed him by the ear and his eyes of Asian decent shot open. "The hell are you-Ow!" he whined.
"Roger!" I lowly hissed. "Get out of here. You know how much I hate this babysitting duty. It's not safe for you-"
Splat!
I blinked once. Twice. I dropped my hand and swept my finger across my lip, catching a sticky red glob dribbling down my chin. "Is this"-I stuck my finger in my mouth-"Blood...pudding?"
Faith's boyfriend stood with a pawful of it, chunky bits seeping past his fingers and dotting the floor.
"Sugar, that was just adorable," I crooned. I scooped my hand into a vampire's bowl of ice scream. "But why don't'cha try this?"
He ducked and the dairy treat slapped onto Faith's face. She screamed, quickly snatching a few French Flies and missed me, hitting a banshee from the Fear Squad.
The cheerleader flipped her shit with a narly, eardrum shaking scream and leaped on Faith. Her boyfriend reached for a bowl of bile to toss, but took a step forward and slipped on blood pudding.
The bowl flew up, all eyes watching as gravity selfishly pulled it down and under it (gravity liked being on top, *wink, wink*), as the bowl dropped on my chest, bile slipping down the front of my shirt and clung to my skin.
I turned to Faith's boyfriend and barked a laugh in his direction. "I'm so taking a shit on your grave!" He couldn't move fast enough as I dunked a plate of Frosted Hairflakes in his precious curls.
Roger climbed onto the lunch table. "Flesh fighttttttttt!" he screamed and hit Faith over the head with his sandwich.
Villains broke loose as teenagers shifted into supernatural beasts; tails smearing blood pudding across fur, and paws splashing ice scream across wings.
I picked a handburger off a gargoyle and slapped Faith across the face. She jumped on me, and tried wrapping a human intestine around my neck. "Is that spaghetti?!" I choked and her vampire growl answered that.
I flipped her back, her spine hitting the table as a tray cracked under her abrupt weight. I felt her grip loosen and scrambled out, taking a look for Roger.
Ducking under a flying slice of creeperoni pizza, I caught a glimpse of a khaki hiking bag. "Roger!"
A thirst hit my throat and I stumbled forward, clutching the lunch table.
Breathe, Vhalerie. Breathe.
The claws hidden under my fingers grew, craving the taste of blood. No. Not now. I shook off the beastly instinct and tightened my grasp on this human form.
Stay human. Stay human.
Planning to leap over a vampire, something possessed over my body and my thighs landed on her shoulders. My legs wrapped around her neck and snapped the bone between them. I heard the crack as I flipped off, the possessed figure vanishing from my system. "Oh my Satan." The beast inside me roared for more death. "Nonono. Don't do this. Not now." I anxiously pushed villains out of my way as the thirst heightened around them.
My eyes snatched onto the khaki hiking bag and I refused to face anything else.
"Roger," I repeated and bent my knees to leap.
"Villains of the Academy!" a female voice boomed. "Whoever moves or throws one more piece of food will be used for target practice."
I ground my teeth together. "Because Satan has a terrible sense of humour and enters the headmistress at the worst time," I mumbled to whomever controlled fate: clearly they wanted to get on my bad side.
I turned towards Headmistress Alice who heard a grain of lice rice hit the floor. The Headmistress threw her hand up, that unlucky mummy slamming up against the ceiling. "Vhalerie!" she screamed. "Where is Roger?"
I caught a glimpse of the khaki hiking bag slip through the doors. Swallowing hard, I stared into her cold grey eyes and leaped over the table.
My foot bounced off of heads and shoulders, hopping my way across the cafeteria.
"Ow!"
"That's my eye you're stepping on!"
"Yeowch!"
"Vhalerie!" screamed Headmistress Alice. I landed at the exit and ran, slamming my shoulder up against the door and threw myself forward.
The spike of Roger's black hair disappeared around the corner. I screamed the idiot's name down the hall and shoved people out of my way. The door to the boy's locker room was about to close and I barely slipped through the opening before it shut.
"Roger," I called out.
Click! The door locked behind me. My pulse quickened.
Roger stood there, face dissolved in fear at the shadow creeping over my shoulder.
My ribs twisted against my stomach and something hard smacked me in the side. I skidded across the floor, pain clawing against my stomach.
Roger's scream bled across the ceiling and my hair yanked up. I swung my leg across, my heel meeting a chin and scrambled up, eyes searching for the kid.
The boy trembling in the corner, I grabbed his khaki bag and pushed him to run towards the second exit door. "Move!"
I heard a plop of something land and Roger's voice.
"My sandwich!" he cried out, reaching out towards it.
I yanked him in front of me, pushing his backpack to gain him some speed. "We all make great sacrifices in life! Now move!" My muscles ached to give him one more shove.
He started running ahead and then stopped, turned and picked up the sandwich. "Roger!" He stuffed it in his mouth and sped after me, backpack jiggling as he looked like a penguin on the run.
Our only exit slammed shut on the other side of the lockers and a hand covered my mouth.
A steel grip snaked around my wrist, pain shooting up my arm at any restraint. Darkness tore into my eyes and I furiously blinked to stay awake.
"Pathetic. You're not as tough as they say you are." My attacker's chest rumbled against my back as he spoke.
I strained for a clear sense and spotted the mirror above the sink, desperately looking at the reflection.
The thin mask across his dark, empty eyes stole my breath.
I tore my gaze off, and whipped my head towards Roger, eyes silently screaming for him to run. He stumbled backwards, horror sucking the colour off his face.
This attacker wasn't a villain.
Cold terror wrapped around my spine and pulled, my back stiffening in panic.
He haunted every villain's dreams; he was an urban legend; he was the man who wanted us dead.
"Dear, Vhalerie," he said.
Hearing my name off his mouth was like snakes hissing into my ear.
Hot breath fanned down my collarbone, teeth tugging at the skin of my neck. My heart drop to my stomach.
"Baby, you call me a myth and claim me as a savior." I muffled a scream under his rough hand. "But even villains can't be helped."
The Hero, my mind whispered.
Fear the one who saves us.
+++
A/N: Anndd I promise it gets better!
Vote if you liked it. :P
xx twister king