Ashton's POV
I sit on my bed so alone, so frustrated, so depressed. So. Stressed. I'm so FUCKING ANGRY AT MYSELF. Why Ashton? Why did you have to ruin everything? Why couldn't you go to your girlfriend? Why did you kiss that girl? A million thoughts raced through my head. Fuck.
I ran through my hair with my fingers and paced my room. Everything was silent. All I could hear was tick, tock, tick, tock. My life wasting away. Slowly rotting.
'We are officially over, Mr. Smith' those words repeated in my head over and over again.
You've ruined everything, Ashton. You're so dumb and worthless. Why are you even around anymore? Just end your dumb life. She hates you, so why live? You've fucked up. It's not going to get better. You are never going to get her back. So end it. End it now.
Tears roll down my face and I look around my room. I have a gun in my dresser. I can end it. I slowly walk over to my dresser and pull out the pistol. I put it up to my head and prepare to shoot. All I can hear is my heart beating and the clock ticking.
'Come on Ashton. Just shoot.' I hear her say. I see her face, reaching out for me. Reaching to caress my face and it then disappears. Her face now filled with anger and hurt and tears running down her face. No, no, no Rose did NOT say that to me. My mind is making up things.
I wrap my finger around the trigger, ready to end my life. If she isn't in my life, it's not worth living. Goodbye, Rose. I love you.
As soon as I was about to pull the trigger, the silence was broken. I heard some very loud moans through these very paper thin walls. These moans were VERY familiar. It was fucking Rose, in Drew's room. Now I've become pissed. I put the gun's safety on and put it into my pocket. I storm out of my apartment and start pounding on Drew's door.
"Ohhhh Drew no don't stop." I hear Rose moan out, unnecessarily loud. I keep pounding and pounding and nothing happens. All I hear are groans and moans and whatever else is going the fuck on.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck," I whisper to myself. This can't be happening. This CAN NOT BE HAPPENING. I'm kicking open the door. I'm not letting this happen. Rose is MINE and only mine. No one is taking her, especially not fucking Drew.
"Ok, Ashton, you got this," I say as I back away from the door, ready to kick it open, "One, two, three!"
I run up to the door and forcefully kick open the door.
"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?" I hear Rose scream from the bedroom. Then I hear a "shhhhh" from Drew.
I walk into the bedroom to see a shirtless Rose and a Drew with only his boxers. I look at both of them, hoping my eyes pierce through them.
"M-Mr. Smith?" Drew stutters out. I start to laugh. I look at Drew and he looks like a scared little girl. I push him up against the wall. I raise my fist to punch him but then:
"ASHTON STOP!" Rose yells out. I look at Drew and shake my head. Not worth it. Also, I would be fired. I am not punching this child. I let Drew go and cleared my throat, preparing to speak.
"Sorry, Drew. I, uh, I could hear you two doing stuff and I thought you were hurting a girl. So I kicked open the door and I thought I would have to hurt you. But it looks like you two were just having a bit of fun. Sorry, Drew, I was just trying to keep everyone safe." I smiled my best smile and pat him on the shoulder.
"Uh, excuse me? You thought it was acceptable to break-"
"Shush." I cut him off. I was staring at Rose, who had her eyes glued to the floor. I grabbed shirtless Rose by the wrist to take her out of that apartment. She kicked and screamed so I picked her up over my shoulder.
"What the-"
"Shush." I cut him off again and walked off with Rose. I walked out of Drew's apartment and slammed the, surprisingly intact, door shut.
"PUT ME DOWN! I HATE YOU! PUT ME DOWN YOU DOUCHEBAG! I HATE YOU SO MUCH! I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU." She screamed as she beat my back with her fists. I walked into my apartment and slammed my door shut. I locked the door and put, still shirtless, Rose down on the floor.
"I. Fucking. Hate. You." Rose said to me in a very articulate way. Tears started to build up in my eyes. I shook my head.
"He was taking advantage of you." I croaked out.
"Yeah right. Drew cares about me. He loves me. He's ALWAYS loyal to me. He would never cheat on me. Drew and I are meant for each other. He makes me feel so good and he pleases me so much with his finge-"
"Stop." I pleaded to her as I put my hands in my pocket. Oh yeah, there's still a gun there.
"No. He pleases me SOOO much with his lips and tongue. And OH GOD don't get me started with his fingers. The way he feels me and caresses me just makes me moan so loud. I know you could hear me, so you know how much he pleases me," Rose continued and I felt like I was being stabbed with every word, "Drew just makes me go, 'ohhhhhh yea oh yea baby ohhhhh yea' and I love that." Rose moaned out and I got a bit turned on. Not gonna lie. I felt like I was slowly dying, though.
"Does he make you happy?" I ask as I look at her face. Her beautiful face, it looked so sad.
"You bet, didn't you hear?" She said and kind of laughed.
"No, Rose. You don't get it. He was taking advantage of you. You are so weak and sad and depressed. You are lost and confused. Drew just wanted sex. That's it. He doesn't want a relationship. He sleeps with so many girls, maybe you don't know but I do. I hear them. Rose, you're just being added to the dumb list of girls he's slept with." I say, locking eyes with her. This is all true, Drew is a total man slut.
"Sure, whatever." Rose said in her sassy tone.
"Just please stay here, with me. You don't have to talk to me or look at me. I'll sleep on the couch and you can sleep on the bed. I know you're not going back home. Please, I'm begging you to just stay here. I don't want anything to happen to you. I won't bother you at all." I beg. Something terrible is going to happen if she goes out. She thinks and thinks with her eyebrows furrowed.
"Fine. The talking stops now." Rose said and I nodded in agreement. I know she's only agreeing because she doesn't want to go back home. She probably also knows I won't let her go, so she agreed of course. Rose left to go sleep in my room and I let out a sigh.
I started pacing the room in frustration and breathed heavily. Tick, tock, tick, tock. The clock, the mocking clock. It's fucking mocking me. It's telling me I'm out of time, with every tick and tock. I groan in frustration and take the clock and throw it at the wall. She hates you and nothing will change.
"NO! SHUT UP." I scream as I throw the clock at the wall. God dammit. Rose runs out and looks at me. She looked concerned and I looked into her eyes. She opened her mouth to say something but immediately takes it back and walks back into my/her room. I place the pistol on the counter and rub my face. I'm just so tired of me fucking up. I lean my elbows on the cool marble counter and put my head into my hands. I groan out in frustration, wishing I didn't fuck up. Wishing I could just go back, but I can't.
I then feel a hand fall softly onto my shoulder. I loosen up and breathe in and out slowly. I can hear her soft, soothing breaths.
"Ashton," She said softly, "Please calm down."
It sounded like she was pleading me to calm down. I inhaled slowly, breathing in the hot, humid, air. I breathed slowly to calm my heartbeat and the thoughts in my head. I turn around and I look into her big, beautiful, full with tears, hazel green eyes.
"Rose, I lo-"
"Don't say it. I'm am begging you to tell me why you were kissing that girl and what happened. This is your last chance, or I'm never talking to you again." Rose said and she seemed to force those last words.
"I, uh, no. That day was the anniversary of something terrible. That day, 10 years ago, my mother died and it's all my fault. I couldn't save her. I was 12 which is old enough to help your own damn mother. On that day, I just wanted to explode. I saw her death flash through my head all day. I couldn't think straight, I just wanted to get away. I didn't want to talk to you because I didn't want to worry you. So being the dumb person I am, I called up a girl friend I've known forever and we hung out. One thing led to another and we, uh, kissed. Rose, I'm really sorry." I say through the tears building up in my eyes. There was a pause and I could see the sympathy in her eyes
"Oh," Rose said. Oh? I just said all of that and all she has to say is, 'oh.'
"Well, uh, I'm going to go into the other room." She spoke out and my eyebrows furrowed. I stayed silent as I watched her walk away. What the fuck was that? I just spilled out what happened and she just walks away? Oh, she's going to get it. I sit down on the couch and prepare my lecture with her tomorrow. Why'd you do that Rose? Just why?
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