I woke up late the next morning. I was feeling alienated because I don't have any idea where the hell I am. Sumalubong sa akin ang yellow walls and butterfly curtains, kinabahan ako, did I drink last night and went home with some girl? Agad akong bumangon. I stumble upon a picture frame, I took it and I saw Danni's face. Nakahinga ako ng maluwag. Bigla kong natandaan kung nasaan ako.
Last night after my five hour excruciating operation, umuwi ako sa bahay ni Danni. I was so sad upon the result of the said procedure. Hinayang na hinayang ako sa buhay ng taong iyon, I could've saved him, but I was too late. Sayang. Hindi ko makakalimutan ang hitsura ng asawa niya nang sabihin ko sa kanya that her husband didn't make it. I really hated myself for that.
I took a deep breath and walked towards the door, paglabas ko ng pinto ay may narinig akong kung ano, kasunod noon ay ang usok at ang tili ni Danni. Tumakbo ako, I found her in the kitchen trying to kill the fire – I think – she made. Agad akong lumapit sa kanya.
"Anong nangyari?" I asked. Kinuha ko sa kamay niya ang basahan at ako na ang nagpatuloy ng ginagawa niya. She faced me, her lips a bit pouted tapos naka-puppy dog eyes pa siya.
"I kinda burned your breakfast." Then she closed her eyes. Oh, she was so cute, I couldn't help but smile. I kissed her head and sighed.
"Ano bang niluto mo?" I asked again.
"Eggs and bacons..." Malungkot pa ring sabi niya. "Sorry, Ed, hindi kasi ako marunong magluto." Nagyuko siya ng ulo tapos ay bumuntong hininga. I just smiled at her. I appreciate her efforts – really – mula nang mawala sa akin si Mikaela – siya pa lang ang unang babaeng nag-abala para sa akin. Kinuha ko mula sa kamay niya ang siyanse at saka pinaalis siya roon.
"Ako na lang. You sit there at the corner or you can watch me." I said, still smiling. Iniligpit ko muna ang mga kalat niya at saka ako nagsimulang magluto.
"Right, marunong ka, you lived alone for quite a long time pero ako hindi ako natuto kahit kailan."
"Dapat sa'yo, Danni, maghanap ka ng lalaking di marunong kumain." Biro ko sa kanya. She made a face.
"Nakakainis ka! At least nag-effort akong pagluto ka! Hmp!"
I laughed. Hindi ko talaga mapigilan ang hindi matawa kay Danni. I don't know what she has pero palagi niya akong napapatawa. It's a good thing. I never felt like this – so alive – for the longest time.
Nang makaluto na ako ay saka ko naman inayos ang mesa, after a while I called her to eat. Tahimik pa rin siya, mukhang naiinis talaga siya sa akin.
"Dandan..." Tawag ko sa kanya.
"Naiinis ako sa'yo." Sabi niya.
"Totoo naman. Hindi ka marunong magluto." Binelatan ko pa siya. Bigla ay binitiwan ni Danni ang kutsarang hawak niya at saka tumayo. She looked as if she's going to cry. Bigla ay tumalikod siya, iniwan niya akong mag-isa sa dining area. Narinig ko ang pagbagsak ng pinto ng kwarto niya. I shook my head.
"I guess I fucked things up again." Napapailing na tumayo ako. Hindi ko alam kung bakit nainis sin Danni sa akin. I was just making fun of her. Hindi ko naman alam na mao-offend siya. I knocked on her door. Hindi naman siya sumasagot, sinubukan kong buksan ang pinto, hindi naman naka-lock so I went in. I found her sitting in the middle of the bed, nakayuko siya at nakayakap sa binti nito. She was sobbing.
I sighed. I made her cry.
"Dandan..." I called her.
"G-go away!" She said.
I sat on the bed and stared at her. Napakamot ako ng ulo.
"Dan, sorry..." I said. She looked at me. Tulo nang tulo ang mga luha niya. Bigla niya akong hinampas.
"You don't even know what you're being sorry for!" She Yelled. Muli niya akong hinampas that time, hinuli ko ang kamay niya and that was when I saw the blisters on her fingers. Pilit niyang binabawa iyon pero hindi ko binitiwan, I also took her left hand at tulad noong kanan niyang kamay ay may blisters rin iyon, tapos iyong hintuturo niya may hiwa ng kutsilyo.
Suddenly I felt like a jerk. Tiningnan ko si Danni, she was still crying and sobbing. I sighed.
"Gago ako." Sabi ko sa kanya. Lalo lang siyang umiyak.
"Nakakainis ka!" She kept on saying. I just sighed. Pilit ko siyang hinahatak patayo pero ayaw niyang sumama sa akin, so I ended up carrying her instead. Dinala ko siya sa kusina, inupo ko siya sa counter. Kumuha ako ng maligamgam na tubig at saka sabon.
"Anong gagawin mo?" She said, still sobbing. I winked at her.
"Trust me, I'm a doctor." Hindi naman siya nagsalita. Umingos lang siya. Kinuha ko ang kanang kamay niya at saka dahan-dahang binuhusan iyon ng maligamgam na tubig, tapos ay sinabon ko ang kanyang kamay, ganoon rin ang ginawa ko sa isa pa. After that, I gave attention to her wounded finger.
"Next time kung hindi ka marunong, wag ka nang gagawa. You might end up hurting yourself again." Sabi ko sa kanya.
"Inis pa rin ako sa'yo. Hindi mo na-appreciate ang effort ko!" Binawi niya ang kamay niya. I just sighed. "Bahala ka diyan. Basata ako kakain na doon." Bumaba siya sa kitchen counter at muling umupo sa may dining table. I just smiled. Nagpalinga-linga ako, I was looking for something and when I found it, I took it out, put it in a plate and joined her on the table.
"Kain." Sabi ko sa kanya. She gave me an evil look. Ngumiti lang ako. Muli siyang tumingin sa akin, this tima nakanganga na siya.
"What are you doing?!" She yelled.
"Eating." I answered.
"Pero sunog yan eh!" Sabi niya. Pilit niyang kinukuha ang plato ko. Yes, I am eating those burned eggs and bacons that she cooked earlier. I want her to see how much I appreciate her effort. Gusto ko ring patunayan sa sarili ko na hindi ako jerk. I ate her eggs and bacons because I want her to realize that her efforts aren't wasted.
"Edward! Baka magkasakit ka! Stop eating that!" Sabi pa niya.
"Luto mo, masarap." Sabi ko. I chewed on the bacon. She just looked at me. Mukhang awang-awa siya sa akin. Then to my surprise, bigla na lang siyang umiyak. Did I upset her again?
"Dandan?" I called her. She wiped her tears.
"Ang pathetic mo kamo! Kita mong sunog na iyan eh, dapat nga sa luto ko tinatapon na pero kinakain mo pa rin!"
"Pinaghirapan ito ng girlfriend ko, kakainin ko."
She wiped her tears. Umiiyak pa rin siya at hindi ko alam kung bakit.
"Nakakainis ka." She said while wiping her tears. Napailing na lang ako. I kept on eating the food she cooked and even though it is burned and it doesn't look so good – it is the best eggs and bacons I have ever tasted.
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Edward was washing the dishes habang ako ay nakaupo lang doon at tinitingnan siya. Hindi ako makapaniwala na kinain niya pa rin iyong niluto ko. Burned eggs and burned bacons in the morning. I shook my head, di bale sana kung sunog lang ang luto ko, sunog na sunog kaya iyon as in iyong kaunti na lang abo na iyon but still he ate it and he even said that it tasted so good.
Hindi ko tuloy mapigilang maiyak. Naiyak ako kasi, I was very touched by his gesture. Walang lalaking gagawa ng ganoon – si Edward lang yata. Napangiti ako. Maybe that thing he did earlier was his way of making up to me – okay naman, nakakatuwa. I really felt good. Biglang nabura iyong inis ko sa kanya dahil sinabihan niya ako ng ganoon kanina.
I stood up and went to him. Niyakap ko siya sa likod. Ang bango-bango ni Edward, kaamoy niya iyong room ko – amoy lavender.
"What?" He said.
"Thank you... for eating my burned eggs and bacons." I smiled at him. Humarap siya sa akin.
"Welcome." He said. He hugged me back and just like that I knew, hindi talaga ako nagkamali that I made him my boyfriend, he's like – I sighed. Pwede talaga siyang Mr. Right material.
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What are you doing? Missing you! :)
I sent that message to Edward. Alam kong busy siya that day kaya hindi siya nakakatext pero nami-miss ko na talaga siya.
"Uy, si Danni may katext." Tudyo sa akin ni Mac – Mac is one of my trusted photographers, matagal na kaming magkasama – since college pa and I consider him as one of my good friends.
"Tse!" Ibinaba ko ang Blackberry ko at saka tiningnan si Mac. "Mac, example iyong girlfriend mo, nagluto tapos nasunog, kakainin mo pa?" Mac made a face.
"Hindi na noh! Sunog na iyon eh. Sura ng lasa noon! Nakakasakit ng tyan!"
"Hindi ka gentleman!" Sabad naman ni Krystelle – my set designer. Napatingin ako sa kanya. "I would kill for a guy na kakainin ang sunog na pagkaing lulutuin ko. "
"Sinasabi mo lang iyan kasi hindi ka marunong magluto."Pang-aasar pa no Mac kay Krystelle. Napangiti ako, siguro nga one of a kind si Edward, kapag naaalala ko ang ginawa niya para sa akin, kinikilig ako.
"Landi lang ni Danni." Sabi pa ng mga ito. Binelatan niya ang dalawa.
"Dan," My secretary, Lianne entered my office. "Mr. David Zuniga wants to talk to you."
Kumunot ang noo ko. David? David Zuniga the hot architect from last Tuesday? Iyong crush ko! Unconsciously, inayos ko ang buhok ko. Agad akong tumayo at saka lumabas ng office ko. I saw David Zuniga at the waiting lounge, holding a white rose while smiling at me.
"Hi..."
Grabe ang haba ng buhok ko. I smiled at him.
"Hello..." I said. Bigla ay inabot niya sa akin ang rose. Kinuha ko iyon.
"I received the call from your secretary last night, I am here for the coffee you promised."
Kulang na lang ay magtitili ako doon. Inaaya niya akong mag-coffee! Gosh! Kalandi ko!
"Ngayon na ba agad?" Tanong ko sa kanya.
"Kung okay lang?" He made those puppy dog eyes, he's so cute!
"Okay, I'll just go get my purse.." Tumalikod ako at muling pumasok sa office. Mac, Krystelle and Liane were all looking at me.
"The hot guy asked me out!" Nagtilian kami nila Liane. Mac just looked at us.
"Girl, bye bye na talaga kay Sugaroo!" Sabi ni Krystelle. Bigla akong natigilan. Narinig ko ang dating tawag k okay Calen and my heart just skipped at beat.
"Gaga ka talaga! Okay na eh!" Liane said. I smiled.
"It's okay. Hindi ko na nga siya masyadong naaalala eh." Sabi ko. I took my purse. Inayos ko muna ang sarili ko at saka muli silang hinarao. "Bye, guys, see you!"
I left my office. Muli akong sinalubong ni David, ang cute niya talaga. Nang magkatapat na kami ay hinawakan niya ang kamay ko at saka ngumiti. I was actually surprised that he held my hand that way. Masyado siyang mabilis pero hindi ko naman binawi ang kamay ko. David's hand was warm and soft, I kinda like it.
"So, where do you want to go?" He asked me. Nag-isip ako saglit.
"Alam mo iyong Tree house coffee shop?" I asked him. He smiled.
"Good choice." He said. I sighed. He's such a gentleman, pinagbukas niya pa ako ng pinto ng kotse, he also made sure that my seatbelt is intact, after that we started talking. I realized that he had a good sense of humor. Nakakatuwa siyang kausap, kalog, magaan and yet I think he's very deep. I sighed again. I have a good feeling that I am going to enjoy this first date.
Oo, first date na ito.
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"Edward, where is Juan Miguel?"
Agad kong ibinaba ang binabasa ko at tiningnan si Mama. Pababa siya ng hagdan habang nakatingin sa akin. I smiled at her tapos ay nilapitan ko siya. Inalalayan ko siyang bumaba.
"Thank you, anak. Now where is your kuya?"
"Uhm, I don't really know, Ma." I said. "Hindi ko na siya inabutan nang umuwi ako kanina." I explained. Mama sat on Papa's favorite chair. She closed her eyes, she stayed like that for a while then she looked at me.
"I am worried about your brother." Sabi niya sa akin. I shook my head. Masakit man isipin but Mama's favorite son is Juan Miguel. Wala naman akong problema doon, it has always been like that since we were kids. Nathan was the one who had a problem with that. Selos na selos noon si Nathan kay Juan Miguel, I grew up with my brothers always fighting each other. Kung matalino si Nathan, matalino rin si Juan Miguel – they have a sibling rivalry at palagi silang nag-aaway noon. Sa mata ni Mama, Juan Miguel is always the best – which made Nathan angrier, sa mata naman ni Papa, si Nathan ang magaling.
I just sat in the middle watching my two brothers' fight for whatever it is they're fighting for, until one day, Juan Miguel just gave up. Mama was so broken hearted when he left home.
But that was another story.
"Ma, malaki na si Juan Miguel." I said. Mama dismissed that thought, she looked at me.
"How are thing with you and little Dandan..." Natigilan ako. How the hell did she know that? Napatingin ako sa kanya. Her smile was teasing me. Agad na namula ang mukha ko.
"Manang-mana ka sa Papa mo. Hindi ka marunong magtago ng emotions."
"I'm good at hiding my feelings, Ma." Giit ko. Mama shook her head.
"Honey, you're my son. I know you too well. You might be good at hiding your feelings pero sa ibang tao iyon. Are you in love with her?"
Kumunot ang noo ko. Ako? In love kay Danni? Hindi kaya. I like her pero hindi pa ako dumarating sa punto na masasabi kong mahal ko na siya. I'm not there yet.
"Who told you?" I asked.
"Nagka-usap kami ng Tita Cornelia mo noong isang araw." I sighed. Tita Cornelia was Danni's mom. I made a face.
"Mama, hindi ganoon iyon." I said. Lalong napangiti ang Mama niya.
"I am really happy for you." She said. "After Mika, ngayon na lang kita nakitang ganyan." Sabi pa nito.
"Ma!" I said. Natawa si Mama. Tumahimik na lang ako. It's been so long since I last saw her laugh like that. Napangiti na lang ako. I stood up and knelt in front of her. Yumuko ako sa kandungan niya.
"Love you, Ma..." Sabi ko. She touched my head.
"Bunso ka talaga..." Sabi pa niya. Our mother and son moment was cut too short when one of the maids entered the living room and called me.
"Sir Edward, may naghahanap po sa inyo." Sabi nito. Tumayo ako.
"Sino?" I asked. Mula sa likod niya ay lumabas ang isang maliit na babae. She was smiling at me, may dala siyang cake.
"Little Dandan!" Mama exclaimed. Agad na nilapitan ni Danni ang Mama ko. She kissed her cheeks. Napangiti lalo si Mama.
"Hi, Tita. Kamusta po?" Danni stood beside me. Napapapalakpak si Mama.
"You two looked so good together." She said. I blushed again. Danni just laughed.
"I bought cake!" She said. Kinuha ni Mama iyon saka nagpaalam siya na pupunta sa kusina para ihanda ang kakainin ni Danni. That was my time. I faced her.
"Bakit nandito ka?" Tanong ko, bigla niya akong niyakap.
"Na-miss kita the whole day!" Sabi niya. Napangiti ako. Danni is really sweet. Hindi mahirap na magustuhan siya. Minsan pa nga para siyang bata. "Di mo ba ako na-miss?" She asked me.
"I was busy the whole day." Lumayo siya sa akin. Nakanguso na naman siya. Pinipigilan ko lang ang sarili kong halikan siya. I pulled her closer.
"Hmmn..." I said.
"Ed..." She said.
"Yes?" I looked at her. Bigla kong naalala ang tanong ni Mama. I smiled at her, maybe... iyon ang sagot ko. There is a big possibility that I might be falling for Danni. What's not to love about her? She's so sweet, caring, childish in a way, but she makes me feel so good. Siya iyong opposite pole ng magnet sa buhay ko, she brought back the color in my life. I want her around, I'm not sure yet, pero I really think that I am falling for... her.
"I'm seeing someone else." She said to me.
Falling...
Falling...
Falling away from her...