Harry
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"Good evening baby." Ashley walked past the kictchen counter and kissed me on the cheek. Her hands found my jacket and peeled it off my shoulders before hanging it up. "We're making treats for your acro fundraiser, but I promise we made an extra batch of cinnamon chocolate chip with extra chocolate chips just for you." Her lips peppered my cheek once more before she returned back to the kitchen.
"Honey, you never told me you had a girlfriend. I know I'm not home much due to the hospital but still."
"I stopped by a few hours ago to drop off your textbook sweetie you forgot it in my car and when your mom answered we got to talking and well..."
They were giggling and smiling and my heart was racing and pounding. I wasn't able to form a sentence with the absolute shock that fueled by body.
"Uh- I... Ashley, can I talk to you?"
"Sure sweet pea but make it quick the ginger snaps are almost out of the oven." I took her hand and lead her into our dinning room. I still couldn't fathom the thought they my mother and my crazy girlfriend have not just met but are cooking ginger fucking snaps together. My mind was reeling with anxiety but I knew I had to do this.
"What's wrong honey bee?"
"Enough with all these nick names."
"But they're cute."
"And you can't keep coming over unexpected... let alone doing my laundry or pretending to be a housewife with my mom."
"What are you saying Harry?" I was shaking my head frantically. My courage was slowly decreasing as I saw her hardened face. Say it Harry, say it. Don't be a fucking pussy. My body was telling me otherwise. I could feel my shoulders slouch and my head lower. Despite all the 'training' Effy and Dylan taught me on how to be 'charming and cool' nothing can prepare you for telling someone the truth.
"We've known each other for a long time, well, you didn't know I existed until this year but we were in the same class just as long as I've known Dylan." The words were coming up like vomit; falling out of my mouth uncontrollably so my head wouldn't give me a chance to think twice.
"And that's okay, I understood why no one ever saw me because despite my want I never put an effort to be seen, but this year I finally took a chance. I changed my clothes, my hair, my attitude, and I don't blame anyone for forcing me to change because I wanted it to and I think it's made me more confident in myself. I wanted you for far too long and I think that all those dreams of us being together made this... the real thing not so 'magical.'' My hands were shaking at the sides and I hated myself for not being able to look directly at her.
"I just think we aren't who we thought each other would be, but I am so fucking glad I was even able to find this out, and that you were even able to give me a chance but I just think that we aren't right together." Her facial expression hasn't changed, didn't falter one bit and as I willed my body to suck in one last breath I finally said the words that have been circling my head.
"I think we should see other people, but maybe we could still be friends."
"No."
"What?" I knew my eyes were frantic looking at hers. She was angry that I understood but the way her face began to turn a red and her hands balled into fist made me rethink how angry she might actually be.
"I said no."
"But- but-" I was dumbfounded at a loss for all words and all thoughts. It was like God was slamming me on the head saying, Here's another challenge for you Harry! Good luck getting yourself outta this mess! ha ha ha!
"Listen to me Harry and listen good." She was taking large steps towards me which caused my feet to scurry back. "You don't break up with me, no one fucking breaks up with me. You're lucky that I even want to kiss you let alone do your fucking laundry. I've made you popular, I've pulled up your grades with all the tutoring I give you, made every girl in this school want to fuck your brains out and you want to dump me?"
My body hit the grey painted wall in my dinning room as her fingers repeatedly hit my chest. Her words sounded like venom, her eyes looked just as frantic as mine must be. "You really think that I am going to let a no good fucking acrobatic boy who had a make over dump me for anyone else? I run this school and I run this shit relationship and it's not fucking over until I say it is got it? And you have the fucking nerve to ask to be my friend. I would never be your friend... not in a fucking lifetime"
I was nodding my head as if my life depended on it but my heart was aching, and my mind was racing a mile a minute. "So we are going go back to your mother, you're going to eat all those god damn fucking ginger snaps. And tomorrow at school, training, even to your fucking grandma-"
"My Nana is dead."... I still hadn't gotten over her passing. Rest in peace Nana.
"I don't give a shit! You're going to act like this never happened. We are going to be the best couple ever and we are going to win Prom King and Queen next month. Am I clear?"
Gulping down every ounce of pride I had I nodded my head. "Crystal."
"Good." She said in such a narcissistic way it caused chills to run up and down my spine. I watched in horror as her face returned to its normal colour, her hands relaxed and her stance changed. She grabbed my head in a loving way but with a a strong grip as we walked out of the door and back into the kitchen.
"Smile" She snarled at me as my mother came into view. "Oh my god Harry yes I'll go to prom with you!" I almost opened my mouth to ask her what she was doing but as she began to giggle at my mother and kissed my lips I knew this was all in her head.
"You asked! And didn't tell me Harry! This calls for more cookies!"
"Let's do it!" They scurried into the kitchen just after Ashley sent me another warning glare and as she kissed me one last time to show off our fake relationship and I pretended to smile, because that's what she told me do... and frankly, my head was so messed up It would be to much of a hassle to do anything else.
****
Watching Ashley and my mother bake for another hour was make my anger fuel and I needed someone to talk to.
My mother had a morning shift and kissed me goodbye on her way out at midnight and that's when I decided to visit Effy. I knew she wouldn't mind, we used to always sneak out and visit each other for long talks but I wasn't sure if it was going to be awkward after what happened to day. All I know is that I needed someone to talk to so my anger would simmer.
The wind was chilly against my skin but I didn't mind it; it kept my thoughts fresh in my mind as I arranged them into the right order at which I would speak them. Planning my thoughts was always comforting.
As I reached her house I smiled at all the memories we shared. I wanted to surprise Effy so I began climbing the side of her house and to her bedroom window; the way we used to always do and the way she would always beg me to enter her home.
My legs wobbled against the cold weather as I reached her window sill and just as i was about to pop my head over and knock on her window i heard something.
"You can't tell him anything Dylan. You have Kiara now and I..."
"You what Effy? You know you want me... this thing between us has always been there ever since the-"
"Don't fucking mention that night. I apparently remember it differently then you."
"Just one more time... no one has to know. Don't you feel the connection? We are drawn to each other. Don't you see it? Our bodies feel so right together, you're probably already soaking through your panties just at the thought of us."
"Stop it."
"But I know you want this Effy..."
"I don't."... "Fuck... do you promise not to tell him anything, not about that night or the other shit."
"Promise."
"Fine. Get over here."
I finally let my quivering hands pull my head up to look through the window and through the slit of her closed curtains I see Dylan and her together. His hands grabbing harshly at her bottom as her hands wind in his dark brown hair. There kisses are urgent and feverish and my heart seems to be pulsing and aching just as fast.
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Oh Effy and Ashley... what the fuck are y'all doing!!!
TALK TO ME:
What do you think Effy is talking about with Dylan?
SCHOOL IS TOMORROW FOR ME AND I AM SOOO EXCIteED
You all know I love you!!!! xoxo