He slammed his hand onto the top of the table. The dream! It had come again. Why? He moaned as his head throbbed. He searched with his hand along the smooth surface of the bedside table. He found the pack of smokes. Picking it up, he pushed himself off of the mattress. His head. He sat up, holding it. He pried one eye open. The pack in his hand was empty. He growled, crumbling it up. He tossed in the vague direction of the garbage can. He needed to quit anyway. Kaoru hated smoking.
He liked the smell of pipe weed, not tobacco. He used to say. Had it really been nearly six years. Kojiro sighed. He scratched at his bare chest. He wore nothing as he sat on the edge of the bed.
The dream. The day he last saw him. Kaoru Sakurayashiki, his one time best friend. Kojiro let out another deep sigh. He reached up to pull the tie out of his messy green hair. He rubbed at the hairs on his chin. He didn't feel like shaving today. He stood.
The dream, more like a nightmare. It haunted Kojiro. Kaoru had chosen him. Adam. The charming young heir to the Shindo family fortune. He was wealthy, like Kaoru's family. He was charming, Kojiro had tried to be. He was perfect if you asked Kaoru. Kojiro was flawed. He was a useless monkey that could, or would, only work in his parents shoe shop. Never mind all the stuff Kojiro did for Kaoru. That was nothing compared to what Adam could give the free, young, socialite. Kaoru chose to go back to the world he claimed to despise, whenever he had been alone with Kojiro.
Kaoru, his first love. Kojiro brushed the mess of his hair out of his eyes. He stood walking to the joining bathroom. A shower. That was what he needed. Six years. Kojiro shook his head. The first six minutes had been hard. After that it just got worse. Kojiro turned the water on as hot as it would go.
He shifted to look in the mirror. He was handsome, at least the ladies liked his face. He had no problems getting one into his bed if, or when, he desired. His soft red brown eyes were dull. He let out another, longer, sigh. He had to shake this off. Today was a big day for him. Today he was going to be Sous Chef. Well, acting Sous Chef until Mari came back. She went out on maternity leave yesterday. It was why he was so tired today. They had a going away/ baby shower for her. He had made the cake. She had loved. Of course she spent most of the night telling him how to do her job. He chuckled as he stepped into the hot spray of water.
No more thoughts of Kaoru. He ordered his brain, letting the water wash over his face. He twisted to get his head under the water. Washing his hair, he watched the soap slide down between his pecs. He had begun working out after Kaoru left. He was rather muscular now. Another thing the ladies loved. Yes, he loved women, but his first, honestly, his only, love had been Kaoru.
Quickly he washed the rest of himself. He turned the water off, dried his sculpted body, brushed his teeth then headed back to his room. It was a bit of a mess. He would have to clean it. His eyes went to the bare side table. He blew out the breath. Right, no smokes. He needed to quit! He told himself once more. He went to the closet. Pulling out underwater, his Chef jacket and black slacks, he put everything on. He found a new hair tie, pulling his wet hair up into bun, he fastened it.
Heading out he saw his neighbor emerging from their apartment. He nodded. The kid loved skateboarding. A passion of Kojiro's ever since... well he who he is not thinking about, decided to try it.
"Hey, Joe, let me see your board!" the overexcited red-head demanded. Kojiro held it out. He watched the kid.
It took him seconds to undo the screws that held his wheels on. One was busted. Kojiro had meant to replace it. With quick, nimble fingers the kid did just that. In fact, he replaced all the wheels. Kojiro spun them as he got the board back.
"They are fatter, will help with your style of skating." The kid beamed at him.
"Reki, you are a genius." Kojiro ruffled the boy's already messy hair. "What do I owe you?" he asked.
"Um, well... you see um..." Reki twisted about.
"Come on, man, just say it." Kojiro smirked as the pair headed toward the stairs. The elevator was still out.
"Mom's birthday is tomorrow..." Reki wouldn't look at him.
"Oh, she loves my Carbonara with cheese sauce, red wine and if I recall, cannoli's." Kojiro winked at the teen. Reki smiled brightly up at him. He nodded.
"You got it kid." They fist bumped. From that point until they parted ways, four blocks from their apartment building, Reki talked nonstop. Kojiro laughed as he twisted around the bend. He waved to the kid, then went on his own way to work. Reki was a good kid. His mom had three daughter's besides him. Kojiro never saw a Mr. around the house. He never asked the kid where his father was, either.
Kojiro picked up his board. The kid must have used the last of his money to get these wheels. Kojiro smiled. He would stop at the shops on his way home. He walked inside. No one else was there yet. Not even the owner. Kojiro had a habit of being the first one in. He flicked the lights on, started the grills and stoves then went to see what the Sous chef needed to do.
Along the way he ended up finishing the dishes from last night, taking care of the mop, before folding the table linens. All before he reached the office.
Seeing what the special was, Kojiro went to work. By the time anyone else arrived he had meat sautéing, sauces going and was beginning to cut up the vegetables for the night.
"Son, you are going to be a fine chef, once you're trained up a bit!" Mori, the head chef, cackled at his own joke. He went to get started on his own specialty dishes only he knew how to do.
Kojiro whistled softly. Sometimes he sang. The others didn't seem to mind. He was more off key than not, but no one complained. They joked around as they got the food going. People trickled in, then they had the lunch rush. Kojiro worked on with no complaints. By the time they closed, he was sore. His muscles ached. All he wanted was to go home.
He reached up to get his board. His back cracked. He looked at the new wheels. Damn, he forgot the kid. He let out a sigh
"Something wrong?" Yuri asked.
"Nah, just need to do some shopping on my way home." Kojiro waved with a warm smile on his face. He skated away.
The night was cool. He took off his Chef jacket, letting it hang around his elbows. The breeze felt great on his hot, sweaty skin. He lost himself in the cool air, the sound of the road hissing by mixed with a light rain that wetted his chest. This was his second heaven. He snarled at that thought. He wasn't thinking about him!
Kojiro reached the lights of the shopping center. He flipped his jacket back on. Walking into the store with his board under one arm, he made his way about selecting the best vegetables for his meal, he went to pick out the pasta. Carbonara. He once swore he would never make it again. It had been his favorite.
Kojiro shook his head. She had just been kidding, reminiscing when she told him how much she loved it. Kojiro had made it for her on a whim. He forgot how it lightened his mood as he cooked it. It was easily he most prized dish he made. Since coming to Italy, he had learned more such dishes. He smiled. He loved to cook for his princess.
Damn it! He screamed inside his head. Why did Kaoru have to ruin what they had. He shook his head letting out a frustrated growl. It scared two teen girls looking at manga. He waved a hand apologetically. One waved back, the other covered her mouth, eyes wide over her hand. He turned away. Kaoru be damned. He hissed
Vowing, again to put him out of his mind, he walked toward the front of the store. He picked up a pack of cigarettes almost unthinkingly. He paid, gathering his bags he walked out.
The next morning, Kojiro woke up. His hand nearly crushed the new pack of smokes. He sat up, lightning one. He drew in the acrid smoke. Holding it in his lungs, he let his body relax. He blew out the plume. His head covered by the grey cloud, he drew in another puff.
Finishing the cigarette, he stood up. Another day. He muttered. Today he was off from the restaurant. Tonight he would work his second job. The one he had while going to school here. He was a bouncer at a local night club. Something his muscles came in handy for. He went to the kitchen.
One day. He thought to himself. It was a little mantra he thought of from time to time. One day, he would return home. He would have enough money, enough experience, he would buy his own restaurant. He would bring the light of Italy to his small town. He would become respectable, not just the lowly teen son of the local shoemaker. This was his dream. A dream to show Kaoru that he was just as good as his beloved Adam.
For a time, Kojiro had checked up on Kaoru. He followed all his social media. Saw all the parties, all the pretty jewels and garments Adam dressed him in. It took a few years, before Kojiro was able to stop himself. He was disgusted by his own weakness. Kaoru had always been his weakness.
Kojiro crushed out his cigarette. He stood to walk into the bath. He showered quickly, rubbing the soap into the deep places of his body. It felt good. He let out his breath. He dried off. His sauce should be ready now.
Kojiro went to the kitchen. He spent the day cooking. It took a lot to make his masterpiece. He poured all of his love, patience and attention into the dish. When it was done, he boxed it up. He walked down the hall to Reki's apartment. Maybe it was because they were from Japan as well, that he felt the need to care for the family. Maybe it was that he no longer had someone to care for. He used to help his parents by taking care of his younger siblings. Then he had Kaoru. Now, now it was just him. He was alone in this new country. He first came to stay with his aunt and uncle. While he was in school it was a good place to live. Everyone needed to grow up. The day he graduated he came to the city. Found his apartment. With that his routine was set. He worked the nightclub on his days off from the restaurant . He made sure he had little free time. Free time resulted in him thinking too much
He knocked on the door. He was about to set the food down, when the door opened. Reki smiled.
"I owe you." The boy insisted.
"No. This is payback for the wheels." Kojiro handed him the food.
"Come in. Celebrate with us." A hand rested on Reki's shoulder as the older woman stepped up behind him.
"I wished I could, but I have to get to work." Kojiro waved good bye, the black shirt tight over his muscles. Reki waved back until Kojiro vanished around the steps.