T R O Y E
"Troye Sivan Mellet get your butt up right now or I'm leaving all of the Nutella here!" At these life threatening words my eyes shoot open, my legs pulling me out of bed and into the hallway.
"I'm up I'm up!" I yell from the top of the stair case. I can hear snickering and Sages slight whisper.
"Told you it'd get him up." I roll my eyes before walking about into my room.
Today's the day. The day I leave America to stay with my senile grandfather in a tiny wooden shack. I look to the black suitcase in the center of my bare room. It looks so awkward, all of my stuff has already been packed and flown to my grandfathers. All that's left is a suitcase full of clothes, my laptop bag full of chargers, and a pillow and blanket. No posters on the walls and no fairy lights. Definitely not a room I want to sleep in for more than a night. I drag myself to my bag before pulling out a hoodie and some sweats, changing in the bathroom still half asleep. Once I'm out I hear my mom call
"Ten minutes Troye!" With a sigh I yell an okay, putting my sleep wear away and lugging my stuff to the car. Then I stare at the cute little house down the street. With white curtains and pale pink walls, this beautiful home holds my only infatuation. Connor. All the lights are off, seeing as its only around 5 in the morning, but I wonder if he's awake. It's possible, he is an internet kid and he never lets me forget that they don't sleep. Hesitantly I raise a hand and wave at his window that you can barely see considering its more to the back. I get no response. "You ready?" My mom asks, appearing beside me.
"sure." I say, taking one last longing look at Connor's house.
"Look, Troye I know this is hard. It shouldn't be like this but we have to go, we don't have a choice."
"I know mom, I get it." Except I don't. I'm 18 isn't it legal to stay by myself? But then the money factor comes into view alongside my separation anxiety, despite pushing people away most of the time and I understand why I must go. But that doesn't mean I'm happy about it. We get into the van, mom driving dad in the passenger seat.
The drive to La Crosse Municipal Airport isn't far. Only around 10 miles from the house. The green hills roll by and I can't help but think about Connors accident. What if we got into one similar to his? What would happen then? Would we stay in America or still continue our journey? I feel Steele's arm brush against mine, only this time I don't get any of his thoughts. I sigh in relief as I lean my head against the window. Maybe this is for the best, Connor won't even look at me so maybe moving away will help me move on. Deep down I know that's not true, but I allow myself to believe it now because I have nothing else to keep me going.
When we make it to the airport I thank god that its not that big, just one building with medium sized planes and a couple workers. After we go threw the security check point and baggage claim we get on the plane. It has about 10 rows back, one walk way with 2 seats on each side. The seats are padded with red and black covers, giving it a modern look even though I can tell that the plane is definitely not new. Mom and dad sit together on the left, me and Sage on the right, and Tyde and Steele behind us. When it comes time for the plane to take off I slip on my sunglasses and lean back, avoiding the window that I shouldn't of sat by. This is always the worst part, the taking off. Connor has told me how much he hates this part too, another thing we've bonded over while talking on the phone at 1 am. I'm really going to miss that. When we get back we'll most likely change our numbers, using Perth area codes again.
"Sir? Would you like a drink?" A lady in a formal blue shirt and black slacks asks me and I push my glasses onto my head.
"Uh," I hadn't even noticed that we're flying at regular speeds, steadily making our way back to Australia. "Sure." I look over to Sage as the lady walks away. Shes curled into a ball, her head on her knees and a blanket wrapped around her feet. That can't be comfortable. The flight attendant comes back with a can of soda and I thank her. Do we not get peanuts on this flight? I feel a slight kick on my seat but ignore it, I know that will only persuade him. I slip on my headphones, playing my Spotify platlist 'Travel'. I'm not okay with my current situation, not with leaving, not with how I left things with Connor, and defiantly not with the amount of times his name has flown through my head.
---
19 hours and 3 landings later I walk up to my grandfathers house, my family right behind me. I knock on the door a few times but no one answers.
"Mom? He's not answering." I say and she gently nudges me out of the way.
"DAD!" She screams banging her fists on the door. Then she leans back and fixes her shirt, the door opening a couple of seconds later.
"Laurelle!" The old man says, grabbing my mom.
"He's half deaf." She tells me through there embrace. I nod before taking my turn to hug him. He smells like candy and dust. I don't like it, although it may be a biased opinion. "Troye, this is your grandpa Paul." He looks at me with a huge toothless smile.
"Hi." I mutter and my mom places a hand on his shoulder.
"Papa where's your dentures?"
"What?" He croaks, looking away from me. "There inside. Honesty Laurelle I'm not eating, I don't need them." My mom rolls her eyes, focusing back on me and my siblings.
"Alright! All the bags can go in the back room, I'll unpack after dinner." Everyone nods and moves to grab luggage that isn't already inside.
"Mom?" I ask as I'm walking inside with my laptop bag In hand.
"Hm?"
"When are we changing our numbers? I want to clear all of my contacts and move them to my computer before we do." She darts her eyes downward guilty and I narrow mine. "Mom?"
"Troye," She starts but a voice interrupts her.
"Laurelle! I need you!" My dad yells and as my mom smiles cheerfully I glare at the hallway. What is she hiding?
"If you'll excuse me, your father needs assistants." She begins to shuffle down the hall quickly before turning and walking back towards me. "Here, grab some groceries while you're out." She shoves some Australian money in my hand and before I can question how she got it and what I'm supposed to buy she closes to door. Way to be subtle mother.
I walk down the familiar streets sullenly, this place is giving me deja vu. Memories of my childhood come rushing back, some of them pleasant some of them not so much. I round the corner, finding the little coffee shop I went to the first time I told my oldest brother Steele I was gay. I smile a bit, remembering his caring eyes and positive demeanor. He's such a good guy. I look at the yellowish orange 50 in my hand and decide that I deserve a drink. A nice hazelnut coffee sounds delightful on this chilly afternoon. As soon as I enter the shop I think of Connor. It smells like him, coffee and lingering mint. I bathe myself in it imagining he's here with me. I wonder if he's ever had hazelnut coffee before, he probably has.
"What can I get you sir?" The cashier says once I approach it. It's so odd, hearing someone with an Australian accent after being in America for a few months.
"Um, can I get a hazelnut latte and a banana muffin please?" an amused smile.
"Interesting choices, that'll be 8.93 please." I hand him the 50 and he holds it to the light. This part always bugs me. I mean I'm basically a 5 year old why the hell would I have fake money? He hands back my change and I stand on the side lines while I wait for my drink. When they call it, I'm surprised to find the same boy who I had paid.
"Thanks." I mutter and he gives me a confused smile, holding my drink hostage.
"You look so familiar, have we meet before?" I shake my head, I don't remember him. Pale face, blonde hair, bright eyes. Cute, but not my cute.
"I don't think so." I say anxiously waiting for my coffee. He continues to stare at me curiously and I clear my throat. "Can I uh, can I have my coffee now?" His face lights up and he practically screams,
"TROYE!" I give the boy a startled look, ignoring the angry ones we get from fellow customers.
"Uh, how-"
"You don't remember me?" He says, covering his heart with his free hand.
"I'm sorry, no." With a sigh he sits down my coffee.
"It's me Bret, from middle school!" My eyes widen at this. What happened to him? Where's the tan skin and olive hair? He used to be so buff and cocky now he looks so fragile that one touch could break him. I didn't notice until I had the image of the old him in my mind but he's super skinny now. Not in a good way either. His cheek bones are to defined and his arms are like lead.
"Oh," I say. "How have you been?" I decide not to mention his obvious body change and stick with a basic introduction.
"I've been alright. How have you been? How was America?" I shrug.
"Warm." Is my reply and he grins.
"It must be so weird for you, being back and all." I try to decipher what that means considering I had only moved to America a couple of months ago. I guess he just means the area, because I moved away from here after Gavin freaked out. Let's just say Gavin could be aggressive and I'm really paranoid. again, I shrug.
"Well, I shou-"
"Oh!" He interrupts and I almost smile. Now here's the old Bret. "Have you heard about Gavin?" My heart drops at the mention of his name even though I had thought it moments before. It's way to real to say aloud. I swallow roughly, shaking my head no. "Well, he got out of jail yesterday."
"Jail?!" I ask, surprised although I know it's possible. He had a temper.
"Yeah! He went in about the same time you moved cities. Supposedly he got drunk and beat a guy to the brink of death outside of a Walgreens." His voice is way to cheery to be announcing that my temper driven exboyfriend just got out of jail.
"Does he still live here?" I ask, fear taking its toll on me.
"Yeah, he lives just down the street I think."
"W-wow." I stutter out, taking a step back from the counter. I need to get back, now.
"Uh Troye?" Bret calls as I walk towards the exit. "Troye you forgot you stuff!" He yells but I keep on walking. The suns going down and I pick up my pace as I walk down the narrow alleys that lead back to grandfathers.
What if he knows I'm back? Will he try and contact me? I don't think I can handle if he does, after the whole Connor situation a run in with my crazy ex won't help my current depression. The street lamps illuminate the concrete as I walk and I keep my head down. Only a few more yards Troye, you can do it. My hearts beating quickly and I'm stumbling a bit. Gavin could be anywhere, he could be watching me right now. He coul-
"Oi! If it isn't Troye Sivan." I freeze at the familiar voice. I wasn't quick enough, he caught me and I have nowhere to run. Well, I do I'm just to scared to move. I hear footsteps and then there's breathing on my neck. I spin around fearfully.
"What do you want?" I demand shakily, he chuckles.
"Well well, look who's all grown up." He smirks wickedly, his dark hair damp and his heavy coat making him all the more intimidating.
"It's only been two years." I spit angrily with new found confidence. He steps forward and it disappears.
"Mhm, true. But you still look different." He bring back his hand and I flinch away, my eyes skewered shut and body tense. He laughs. "There it is."
"W-what?" I stutter out, opening my eyes to find his abnormally adoring.
"The innocence, the fear. You used to be so pure and sweet."
"What makes you think I'm not anymore?" I ask.
"Because your eyes are bigger, which means you've probably seen more. You let your hair stay naturally curly instead of doing it, which means your more confident in yourself. And your taller, which only makes me wonder what's going on under your clothes." I squeak, wrapping my arms around myself as he laughs again. Even though his theories are all wrong and impractical I still feel exposed and hallow in front of him.
"What do you want?" I repeat my original question.
"Troye, do you know where I've been the past two years?" I shake my head although I know good and well where he's been. "while you were making out with boys in America I was here, in jail." Before I can protest that I've only been making out with one American boy he continues. "All because of you." My eyes widen and I take a step back, my back hitting brick. How the hell is he going to blame me for beating some up?
"How is that my fault?" He steps forward too.
"Because you were the reason I got drunk." And it hits me. When he left that night I never saw him again, I just thought he was hard core avoiding me. He must of beaten that poor citizen because of me and my horrid secret. "Speaking of that night Troye boy, can you still read minds?" When I don't answer he presses his body against mine, sending me a thought clear as day.
Answer me now or I will do something only you'll regret.
My eyes widen and sputter to reply. "Y-yes." He smirks. I try to get out from under him but he keeps me pinned, eyes wild and hands rough. How did I think he was lovable?
"L-let me go." I plead and he ticks his tongue.
"No can do, it's time for you to pay." With sweaty hands and a painfully fast intake of breathe I try to push him away. What does he mean pay?
"F-for what?"
"For getting me locked away. I lost my scholarship because of you, now it's your turn to lose something." I gulp audibly, (audible.com/Connor) and he grabs my hands and puts them above my head. "Guys?" Three boys emerge from the darkness and I try to scream. One of the boys tap my mouth, dragging me further into the alley.
"What now?" One asks and Gavin grins evilly.
"Well, now we beat him into the cement."
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A/N
So the next two chapters are going to be super short but super eventful, (unless I change my mind and decide to change something) so be prepared.
Thanks to Brooke (my bby ily Brookie) for inspiring me to finish this chap cause I was not having it. Go follow her: @brookeaudrey200