"We can leave the house, lead the party, let the people know" - Million Dollar Bills
-
Cole showed up ten minutes later and then took me home. He gave me a weird look when I got into the car, but I ignored it. This was what he wanted, wasn't it? For me to smile? I swear, he is so emotionally bipolar.
"I'm sorry for taking so long, work-"
"Who is she?" I interrupted, looking over at him.
This isn't the first, second, or third time that Cole has spent extra time at work these past few months; we were definitely well over the tenth time. Cole doesn't have a lot of friends, and the ones he did have, he would've just brought them home and hung out with them. His job wasn't the most fun, definitely not fun enough for him to want to spend more time there. The only reason Cole would stay out and not come home was if he wanted to hang out with someone he planned on doing a little bit more than hanging out with.
Cole doesn't bring girls back home, because he knew I'd probably end up throwing a fit and scaring them away. I didn't like the thought of another girl potentially taking Cole away. He was the only one who actually cared. There was no way I was letting some random girl trail in and steal him from me.
Cole looked taken back, and his grip tightened on the steering wheel. "Just some girl from work, I just met her."
I watched him with a smile and shrugged. Contrary to my usual worries though, I couldn't honestly care less what Cole did with his mystery girl right now. I feel like I'm on top of the world.
I told you that Kris is good for us. If you're looking for a "thank you", you're not going to get one. That's cool, but I may say I told you so later; right now I'm worried about Cole. What about him? I think that he's lying to you. I don't care, besides he would never do that. Adrianna, he's lying to you. I don't care, I'm on top of the world. Adrianna. I'm on top of the world.
"That's cool," I responded, then turned towards the window.
I felt his eyes on me, and I just rolled my eyes. His eyes should really be on the road.
"And how was your day at school today?" He asked slowly, and I turned back towards him.
"Absolutely terrible. As usual." There was nothing good about the school day. I had a headache for the entire time after lunch, and before that school was just boring. There will never be anything good about school. I mean, after this afternoon seeing Kris would be cool, but I will never want to go to school. Not when there is the possibility to either be dead or at Sebastio's with Kristina.
"Then why are you so...happy?" Wrong word.
"Content." I quickly corrected, then continued. "And because I've had revelations about Kris. She keeps me content and she's very understanding." Translation: She likes my scars.
"That's great Adri..." Here comes the but "But you've only known her for a few weeks. Don't you think that it's a little soon to be making that kind of conclusion."
"I don't think that at all." I immediately shot back. I feel the need to defend Kris now. She is the only person who has ever called my scars beautiful. She still wants to be my friend, even after finding out that I hurt myself; she still wants to be more than my friend. I'm still not sure if I am ready for something like that, but Kris has definitely earned the right to be defended.
"Well, then you wouldn't mind telling Tabitha that tomorrow right? You remember that you have to go-"
"I don't have to. You want me to." I snapped back glaring at him. There goes my good mood.
Tabitha is my therapist and has been for the past 10 years. The only reason she's lasted this long is because for the majority of the years I've spent with her Cole was in the room during our sessions, so I couldn't stab her or anything. By the time Cole stopped coming with me, my mother had already started ordering the sedatives, and there was no way I was going to misbehave with those things around.
The therapist position on my extensive medical team is the only one that has not had to be replaced. Tabitha is the only person who I haven't successfully injured and scared away. Don't let that fool you into thinking that I liked her or anything. I hate the woman. I hate her more than anyone else on the face of this Earth. Cole always says that isn't possible because I haven't met everyone on Earth, but I've always called bull on that one.
The woman is terrible. She keeps trying to take away the person I love most all because she can't see him. She is supposed to be "understanding" and "my friend", but she doesn't accept the thing that I needed her to most. 90 percent of my homicidal thoughts are towards her and 100 percent of my suicidal thoughts are because of her. She's prescribed me so many meds, that it's hard for me to not like myself.
I've told my parents and Cole countless times how much I don't like her. But they've just continued to argue that if she's lasted so long, then she has to be working. When really the only thing that is working is them threatening to practically put me into a coma. The only one who ever listens to me is, of course, Ellie. Ellie likes to help me argue my case and has always been team Adri.
I felt the car slow down and that didn't help my temper. I understand that I almost got us into a car crash during one of my tantrums, but that was almost a year ago, and I didn't appreciate him making the assumption that I would do it again.
"I know that you don't like it there-"
"And I really don't like being there alone," I added, just to remind him how much I don't like that he stopped coming. Claiming that he "has bills to pay". I mean. he probably did, but I was sure that we could just save money by not making me go to therapy.
"But I need you to go. Please." Begging isn't going to work. I beg not to go all of the time, but I still had to.
"Could I take Kris with me?" I suddenly asked, looking over at him.
I am now thoroughly convinced that Kris can make any situation better. She made school bearable. How many people do you know who can do that?
Cole scratched the back of his head. "Not just yet Adri. I think that we should wait a while before we start doing that. Don't you think so?"
I rolled my eyes at him, before turning away. "Obviously not. I don't want to talk to you anymore."
And that was all I said before I turned away from him.
Δ
"So...what are you doing?" I rolled onto my back, holding the phone to my ear.
"Is that why you called me Adri? Or do you just miss me?" Miss isn't really the right word.
Kris had given me her number right before I left. She said it was for when I have urges to hurt myself. Little does she know, that is all of the time. I didn't tell her that though because I didn't want her to take her number away from me. I kind of needed it for times like these.
By times like these, I mean times when I don't feel like talking to anyone else in the house. I ignored Cole the entire ride home and only said "Hey" to Ellie before going up to my room. Ellie didn't do anything to make me upset, she never does, so I don't see a need to ignore her. Cole, on the other hand, I am upset with and do not want to talk to at all.
"No, I'm bored." And sad, and also have a dying passion to not be in this house.
"Did you do your homework?"
I sat up with a puzzled expression. "What are you smoking?" Whatever it is could not be good for her because she just suggested that I do my homework, after I told her that I was bored. What part of "I am bored" does she not understand?
Then she laughed, and all of my current problems seemed to fade away. Her laugh was intoxicating but in a very, very nice and gentle way. I know that before it puzzled me how she could just laugh at anything, but now I could probably listen to it all day, and never ever get tired of it, just like a really good song.
Kris's laugh is my favorite song.
"I'd be happy to come and get you if you're so bored." She offered, and I was very intrigued.
"Like run away? Because that would be great. I'd love to run away with you." I replied in an enthusiastic whisper. I couldn't say that too loud because Cole has shown, on many previous occasions, that he can sense me wanting to run away. I don't want to help him out by letting him actually hear me say it.
"No Adri," I pouted out of disappointment "I mean like hang out. I could take you somewhere fun."
"Like a date?" I asked, scrunching my face up in distaste. This phone call was getting worse and worse by the minute.
Kris fell silent, and my stomach dropped. I really hope that I didn't just upset her. She's my only real friend right now, so I can't afford to lose her. The thought of losing her right now had me clawing at my heart. It needs some air. My chest is hugging my ribs too tight.
"We don't have to call it that," A large breath left my chest when I heard her voice again "We don't have to call it anything; It can just exist. You still have three more days to figure out whether or not you want to date me or not. Right now, I just want to cure you of your boredom. Take you out somewhere and maybe get some Sebastio's."
The Sebastio's bit was probably most enticing.
I glanced at my door, biting my lip. "I'm going to have to sneak out. My brother won't be too happy when I get back." Furious was more like it, but she didn't need to know that.
"Don't sneak out, tell your brother. I won't let anything bad happen to you. I'll take care of you." There goes the oxygen again.
The thing was, Cole won't let me go out with just one person without telling them about the sedative and giving them one. I know that Kris already kind of knows about the sedative, but I don't want her to have one. Right now she is my only safe place, and I don't want to ruin that. She really doesn't need to know that I didn't tell him. It's best for both of us if she doesn't.
"Okay, I'll tell him." When I get back. I'll tell him when I get back.
"Do you need for me to talk to-"
"No. I'll meet you at the park by my house."
I didn't wait for her to answer before I hung up. This was going to be hard enough without Kris bothering me.
I made sure that the door was closed and that no one was coming up the stairs before moving towards my window. Cole had placed my bookshelf in front of it in hopes that I wouldn't be able to do what I was about to do right now, but all I have to do is to make sure to quietly push it over so that it doesn't make any noise.
When I did, I turned off my phone and stuck it in my pocket before opening the window. Cole had put a tracker on my phone, but it would only work if my phone was on. That made me want to leave it behind, but I know that he'll be even more upset if he finds out that I left it behind, unable to call him if I get into danger. I'll take it but won't use it unless I have to.
My next problem is jumping down from my window. My room is on the second floor, and the ground does not look too forgiving. I actually kind of like walking on both of my legs and being able to use my arms. I stared at the ground disapprovingly before taking a deep breath.
We're doing this for the Sebastio's.
I sat on the edge of the window sill, before closing my eyes and slowly sliding off.
I felt like I was flying for a few moments. It wasn't for very long, probably only five seconds, but very satisfying all the same. The wind through my hair and my hands in the air, I was kind of like Superwoman.
It was great.
I glanced back at my window, and then my house. I took a deep breath before taking off down the street.
Time for my (not so really) great escape.