5-6 YEARS AGO AFTER JUMPING OUT OF THE WINDOW AT SOMINO HERNANDEZ HOSPITAL TO AVOID A FIGHT WITH NAOMI-YUA HIMURA.
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Everything along with the sides of my head began to pulse upon falling. I just leaned my head back. My eyes peeled open at the already dark sky. Gray clouds mocked the way I ran and flew out the window like a cartoon character.
It didn't benefit me—but instead embarrassed me.
I don't want to think of just how correct Immanuel was. So I had tried to make the effort to ignore his words and Nine's vocalization.
I had gone into this situation completely, thinking I would have hit some form of concrete. It would have broken my fall to such a heavy extent, but instead, I found myself nearly impaling myself with one of the swords and on the top of a white trunk.
The impact of the fall could have easily caused a dent, the second floor wasn't exactly the lowest to the ground. It made my head pound at the way it bounced momentarily.
I winced out in pain, the knife still in my shoulder, the pain is now acknowledged. My jaw nearly dislocates itself from the forceful opening. The throbbing and the metallic taste is something that lingers.
My eyes shoot open the moment I hear the side door fling open. I swing my own arm towards the blade practically sticking out of my skin before pulling it out from the back.
The scream I had let out could have only been described as bloodcurdling and ungodly. Like a little dormouse realizing the shelter he seeked from rain was action at the bottom of someone's musty shoe.
With gritted teeth and lack of energy, I roll towards the other end of the truck's top before falling over.
I fall to my knees if anything else instead of my feet like I had hoped. If my earplugs weren't still buried somewhat deep in my ears, I would have immediately heard the crack instead of just feeling it.
An old man, who looked to have been of middle eastern or north african descent raises his hands. His lips move—but I can't understand a single phrase that spills out. It doesn't help that he's speaking with his hands argumentatively instead of 'vocally'.
I ruled it out as him speaking another language, but instead of staying here longer than I should, I slipped out a quick apology before scurrying towards where Immanuel's car was.
The moment I had entered the car, all the questions he had asked in regard to my disheveled state didn't register. It couldn't have. All that occupied my mind was the mere idea that in a time of need, my alter abandoned me.
Did I even understand the disorder that had been reigning my head since I could formulate a thought of my own? Weren't protective altars there to fight when you took the flight route?
Even when Nine was 'in' she couldn't press the trigger—that simple action could have saved me so much distress. But no, she stalled in the same way I did before I had gotten upstairs.
And now I have to struggle with the cognitive repercussions of regret and embarrassment at will.
I ran my hands down my face after one of Corinelli's men wrapped and treated my wound...wounds on our way towards southern headquarters. The sniffle that leaves my nose is one that promises mucus the moment I hit the bathrooms to clear it out.
My eyebrows creased so much, I feel some sort of strain that comes along with it. The corners of my lips frown, but all I could do was switch my gaze from my freshly calloused palms to the sight of familiar building's.
My lips part in the same way my inner corners begin to dampen. There had been only myself to blame for being a pussy.
Highly trained assassin of authority my ass.
How could I have killed Daitan Hamasaki, but couldn't even touch another silver piece below him?
It all seemed very backwards.... Or was I the only one backwards?
I hold my blink, trying to line my thoughts with reason. Not emotion.
But I couldn't help but feel like I was falling down a rabbit hole and everything would have changed from here on out. Was this what that was?
I let the thought marinate in my head for the few seconds we were still in the car before it parked.
It was then my eyebrows had flatlined. Fuck.
Maybe I didn't know the man I had killed that night was a decoy of the actual him, but there might have been a strong chance that my subconscious, my alter—Nine knew.
But I couldn't have been too sure, my mental capacity to formulate anything that wasn't along the lines of '' You're a disappointment to your father and his legacy'' dissipated just as fast as it appeared.
Doors from all sides had begun to open, the next thing I knew, I was leaning on the side of the car door, refusing to face the many familiar faces that stood in front of the house.
Out of a bundle of dozens, three faces were the only ones highlighted in my view.
Narissa's eyebrows frown.
For someone who is beneath the WEIA witness protection program after her father, a politician from Barbados, was charred by the structure, her freedom to just walk around amongst the agents had me questioning her relevance for a while.
Eventually it didn't matter. But as of the moment, for a woman who would have rather chewed on glass than display her faults; she was stepping into the pretty expressive zone at the moment.
If the younger range of students weren't all standing and looking my way, I knew she wouldn't hesitate to hug me. Or, at least try to.
I felt my face scrunch up, thinking back to the moment I had made a mockery of myself all while holding weapons who were all the more mighty than I was. Still tainted in blood from the tips, secondary holes were made on the top of my backpack.
I couldn't have held them without my hands compulsively shaking. The voice that whispered, Failure, at such loud volumes were only a small fraction of the internal turmoil I was undergoing.
I let out a breath.
My gaze falling to my feet and the cobble stone of the driveway I drove over. The more I had kept on trying to dismiss the cognitive distortion of the past, the more the rumination stuck.
Anxiety had crept up on me, so intense in the way my chest had burned with wanting to avoid it. My hands clutched on themselves, the way I held back every word that would have revealed my current emotional state.
Everyone had begun to return back inside the rather large mansion, eventually going their separate ways. But no, instead, Narissa had stayed back.
A curt nod from the WEIA security intel had left us alone for sometime.
When we had found a common ground of comfort, she had spoken more than I had. The expression she made when I had told her everything had almost broken me to a point of no-repair.
I had never felt this much despair. Not since my father's death had brought me to the point where I thought I could face the 'council of pricks' who ordered his hit on my own.
I had elaborated a little more when we had reached my dorm, my agent number still plastered onto my wall had collected dust in the span of half a decade or been unkempt.
I entered my room so early, but the very next day consisted of a late start, an empty stomach and an emotion driven migraine.
My shoulders dropped in the same way my eyebags had. I had slept a solid hour and a half out of the expected eight. The cognitive distortion haunted me, almost as if I had been stuck in a loop where I had the obsession, filled my chest with stress and I found myself compulsively searching for reassuring quotes on google to reassure myself It wasn't my fault or that I was a different person than I was yesterday.
Was a new diagnosis in order...?
I smacked my lips, bloodshot eyes are the only thing I see staring back at me through the mirror at this moment. My heart had felt like it had been put through the ringer, the way all color had drained from my face unhealthily.
The bottom of my lips have become so chapped.
Everyone would have guessed the events that went down, not even less than twenty-four hours ago didn't go as planned. They left me ruminating in the same breath leaving me as if I had mourned the death of my bravery.
The sandpaper felt at my throat forces me to bend over the sick, getting a taste of that nasty lukewarm water from the tap. Wiping at my mouth the feeling doesn't magically disappear like I had hoped it too.
I don't find it within myself to head downstairs and eat, much less socialize. I might come across Damien's pills and start getting ideas.
The parallels between how I am feeling at the moment, and the way I felt four years ago had simply been uncanny. For the exception of a Corinelli gravesite and a fish pond, it had all remained the same.
The emotions were there, all I needed was the imagery of that time to begin spiraling back into my lowest point. Where again—confort couldn't save me this time.
My knees bled with how long I had kneeled on the bright red cobblestone as tears brimming my eyes; snowflakes have begun to flood the outskirts of the western hemisphere. The white; a solid reminder that those sakura petals, once white enough to mock even the clouds' contents, were gone.
With the dress I had worn back at the gravesite–that I had willingly walked away from–now soaked, the cool air was not being good to me.
My eyes had morphed bloodshot, my lungs were begging for air despite my head leaning above the surface. My knees had given out a long time ago; I was tempted to overdose on my prescriptions until I found out they were thrown in the very same pond I was hovering over.
It was how I came up with an alternative plan; ones with my father's clock koi fish sprawled around me like rare orange flowers in a jungle of green vegetation. I was more than ready to join my father. I had my plans mapped out to a T.
The funeral of the Corinelli man's death had been orchestrated in the confines of his own home–One I had grown up in. I had walked around like a grieving spirit; my features had been covered by the veil of pooling mascara I'm sure had already fucked my face over. Clearly, there was something wrong with me at this moment in time.
There was nothing but tunnel vision from the moment I had stepped foot onto the grave sight. Not even the sound of silence, nor the music of my heels clicking could rip my sight away from the hot colored calligraphy of a smiling man.
Even in the face of death–that dimple had never ceased to exist.
But I couldn't take it anymore, the reason for my rushing towards the pool of Koi attempting to bury myself under some heavy ice, rocks chained to my feel to force me to fight my way towards the surface; all while knowing there is no point in fighting it.
I would have closed my eyes and woke up in Ten's arms.
It's all I really wanted.
The attempt however was cut short.
Death had been too picky to take me.
The bastard had resorted to allowing Corinelli men to drag me out. Why would they save a secondary problem that would be good for nothing other than sulking? It was beyond my energy and comprehension.
A sandpaper-like feeling blossomed in my trachea; making it hard to formulate coherent words without men dragging me away from the semi-frozen Koi fish pond.
The phrase 'Let me try again!'' was given a completely different meaning now that I've lost all I could, all deemed worthy of my energy; my motivation to keep on going, to thug it out. It was gone...
...He was gone.
My lips open like a fish out of water, my vocal register paining me more like a stab wound the way my eyes slowly begin to close.
''L-Let me— let me try again...'' Were the words that had managed to slip out of my swollen vocal chords when my grandfather's men were dragging me out of my father's semi-frozen Koi fish pond–robbing me of a re-try at my suicide attempt.
Ms.Santos had helped me alot in that aspect, but it's an element of my treatment that I had still been in the process of working on. The aching feeling in my chest had been a solid 7 in comparison to the 10 it had been that day.
It was manageable, but I wouldn't choose to look at my knives nor see the sight of a cliff I could have possibly jumped over.
The temptation had also become a bargain.
In a moment's notice, a knock on my door took me out of my own thoughts. I made the effort to crane my head to the side of the room, where the door was located. Instead of rushing towards the door like intended–if my body would have allowed it– I waited for a specific pattern of some sort to sound.
The other person on the door had begun to pause as well. My eyelids were about to close in on themselves until I heard that specific pattern knock.
Atleast, trying to make myself somewhat presentable, I forced myself up towards the bathroom. Ran a cold water stream down my face, hiding the evidence of stress and turmoil before patting my face.
''Uno momento,'' I almost whispered before staggering towards the door.
Placing my ear against the cold frame, faint mumbles on the other side of the door welcomes me. '' Oz,'' Narissa spoke out loosely. I exhaled quietly, my eyes closing tightly.
'' Povero bébé,'' I let out a faint chuckle at her mockery of the maid Georgina who had moved up the northern estate. I hear the sound of glass clinking together shortly after.
I turn my head to her. ''I'm guessing you've been around Alderete men enough to pick up some spanish?''
She nods proudly.
I nod my head, eyes closed and hum.
''The first part was Italian, Reese.'' I see her shoulders fall. She audibly sighs. The ghost of a smile makes its way onto my face when she whispers out Dominic's name in annoyance beneath her breath.
''This is what happens when you take language lessons from a white-washed spaniard.'' Her laughter is the only audible one within the room.
It dies down quickly.
Walking towards the door, I grip the handle, observing Reese's head peak through.
I hold the door wider before leaning on the frame, '' Don't do that,'' I ask, my head shaking as I gesture for her to enter.
'' Your Italian wasn't bad.'' I paused. Scanning the room in thought.
''It was actually pretty soothing to hear.'' Her closed lips form into a smile. '' But it's just the thought of another deep feminine voice projecting those words in that language that makes me miss her even more.'' She pats my shoulder, entering further.
The thought of the sweet old woman immediately making a face. The things I would have done for that woman— a secondary mother despite her age of 67. The tray Reese places on my bed gives me an even more nostalgic memory.
My friend turns, the expression of pity evident on her face. '' You know I didn't mean to give you that imagery ,'' her light Bajan accent seeped through her syllable. She touches the tips of her brown curls faintly, kiwi-colored eyes open the size of plates.
She points towards the bed like a toddler showing her parents a drawing she made in class, '' Look, food,'' she bribes.
I nod ever so slowly, '' I see that,'' I shut the door behind me, before sitting on the edge of my bed, Reese on the other.
''You see, huh?'' I purse my lips in a nod before blinking one eye lid at a time. Her bandaged hands. They rub against her thigh and I look down for a split second, knowing there is more she would have liked to add.
'' Could you have also seen blackstar coming your way or was it—'' she shook her head, ''---just a momentary thing?'' I brought my bottom lip in my mouth before telling her about Adriel's warning beforehand.
The anklet that had rested on my ankle for the past four years had now become a makeshift bracelet with thorough wash. I showed her, the corners of her lips raised.
'' Didn't rust one bit?'
'' Real sterling,'' I nodded.
'' That shit is expensive, even coming from an upper class standing point.'' She brushes my arm, '' He really did care for you at some point. It was rare to see then, even now with this even less,'' I scrunch my nose before I shake my head.
I turned to her, '' It was a precious time period''
A foundation of a 7 long year relationship couldn't have continued. Not with the risk of him dying on the priority or self-infliction on my side. Things just didn't work out between us, and we parted our ways.
The title of friends would have been too painful to consider. On both sides, but we were close enough to consider ourselves literal partners in crime. Not in any other definition, at least not anymore.
It was a somewhat friendly breakup...
If you count me hanging off the ledge of a building and Adriel's free hands pulling his long curls into a bun rather than helping me, then yeah—pretty friendly.
Quickly, I changed the conversation.
Reaching towards the fresh piece of pie, I inch for the mango shanks tossed towards the side. Whipped cream coating the cold slice before popping it into my mouth. I hear Reese laugh silently, but her next words make me stop chewing momentarily.
'' Did you take your medication today?'' I looked at her as if she had gone mad. But once again, I shook my head no.
I send her a curt smile, '' We're changing the subject now.'' She brings her thumb towards her mouth, licks it then forwards it towards the corners of my mouth when I'm in the process of swallowing.
A human's version of cats grooming each other.
She pauses for a moment, trying to see my expression before stealing a peach slice from off my plate. 'Don't question it.'' And I don't.
We just sit there, in each other's embrace for the longest moment. I hadn't even thought back to the cognitive distortions from yesterday. Maybe surrounding myself around the agent's closets to me could have distracted me from being alone with my thoughts.
I pop another piece of cold fruit, a slight onion or garlic tang to it the way it brings me back memories of all the times Ten would mutely apologize by bringing cold cut fruit to my door.
It wasn't complete without the garlic aftertaste of an ethnic parent's love.
Softly, Reese cups my cheeks into hers. ''You look like you're dying, baby.'' She's quiet to whisper and I am quick to nod.
'' New makeup style I'm trying out,'' I joked into silence. Her expression remains unchanging. The shift in conversation was expected.
'' I'm not ready for the priority.'' I shook my head from side to side momentarily.
The woman at my side doesn't have to speak in order for me to understand she'd given me the floor long ago.
'' I'm not strong enough. I mean look—'' my whole body faced hers, '' I couldn't even face Himura. Let alone the men she came along with,''
She furrowed her eyebrows, '' Didn't they—''
'' I wasn't in. Nine had taken full control, at that point, I was just an innocent bystander, like a rat standing on my own head watching everything unfold in front of me.'' I smacked my lips, distaste lingering instead of onion.
'' Doesn't that prove I wasn't strong enough to do it myself? I needed my alter to take over for me in order to do it,'' I shook my head.
'' On top of everything that happened yesterday; I am a wanted face in the underground east.Well, they may not have seen my face, but blonde roots would be hard to keep on the dl after a while. '' I sighed, cold fingers rubbing against my temples.
'' How could I have possibly protected our golden ticket to the birthday party all while trying to keep my ass alive, and target the people who ordered the hit on my father?'' So many thoughts rushed through my head, it was only natural.
So much was expected of me—the people around me were overestimating my character. It was getting to my head, and not in a good way.
I had spoken so much between us, it had almost felt as though I had been alone again.
'' Advice, sympathy or distraction?'' Slowly, I raise my eyebrow at the sound of Narissa's voice. My expression suggested a 'what'. She had taken it upon herself to elaborate.
'' Your mindset matters, and you don't know how long you have until you're thrown east. As soon as one of the agents on priority comes back dead, it's wraps for you,'' I blinked compulsively, my words failed me.
'' Re—'' she cuts me off.
''The gym always helps Daniel keep his head on straight.'' Her eyes widen for the slightest bit before she looks down. Her fingers fumble with themselves before clearing her throat.
''...So i've heard.''
I frown my eyebrows. ''How do you know that?'' I pop another mango in my mouth. My eyebrow raises when I see the slightest bit of hesitation reveal itself from the corner of her two-toned lips.
''Is it so wrong for a girl to use the stairmaster while someone else just so happens to be in the gym at the same time every 3 to 4 days in the gym?'' She doesn't give me the time to respond.
''There are like 4 gyms in this establishment.
She shrugs. Compulsively staring at the door she entered not too long ago.
''A bitch can get lost—'' The sound of her weight-watcher beeps. It cuts her off.
Instead of answering my question, she is quick to press a kiss to my forehead before running out of the door.
—
The next day hadn't been any different.
The morning started off abdominally slow. I fought the temptation to bury myself further into my comforters considering less than 40 hours ago, concrete had been my cushion.
My attempts at twisting my pillow towards the colder side had fallen futile, easily with every wince. The alarm that rang throughout the house had begun to cause unnecessary acoustics in my ear. I tried reaching for my earplugs only to realize they've been buried deep in the top drawer of the nightstand.
My phone, on the other hand, hung off the edge.
I had begun to grab it while the alarm reduced slowly during its 5 minute intervals before sounding louder than the last.
Although my phone had been given back to me after therapy by Ms.Santos, I hadn't actually bothered to power it on. It's been four years, the phone had been outdated and I would have requested a new one if Silas wasn't already on it.
The sim card exchange, all the transfers from four years ago had become embedded into the new phone I hold. Powering on the Iphone 14, I bring my lower lip between teeth as it takes time for face recognition to do its job.
Especially now that I've unraveled the braids but sooner or later I make it into my phone. Many emails—ones I have no intent to open—welcome me. I mindlessly skip through them, exiting the app only to scour for the Blind pig game on my phone.
It takes time for the outdated chess game to welcome me, but when it does, it showcases the gray offline button on the very top screen. My opponent hadn't been active.
His status started 17 minutes ago.
It had been my turn for a good four years now. I squinted, examining how I had a stolen black rook, but he depleted the attack by bringing my white king to his knees in checkmate.
I brought my bishop upwards in a diagonal in order to capture his knight.
Satisfied with my play, I opened the message icon that had a current red-pulse just begging for me to open it.
1420 days ago
I wish you luck the same way I know you'd wish for us.
That message had been sent four years ago. And considering the timing, I could have only thought about the chances of Adriel shooting out the message immediately before boarding the plan to the East.
I rest my head up on the headboard, dropping my phone between my legs.
At least now—if I chose to bring my phone on a mission with me—I'd have some form of contact with him. Especially because of how ancient this game is, being able to track its players wouldn't have been a mere mention.
I had remembered Dante helping us use some illegal website to download the game back when I had actually lived with my father and not visited WEIA on occasion.
Nowadays, I would have countered it as the opposite.
Closing the phone, I let the distraction of the game keep me from thinking about Immanuel's point and how I had truly been a flake. My closet had been rummaged through, only to dispose of new training attire rather than the ones I've grown used to four years ago.
But such a thing didn't last as long as I wanted it to.
When I woke up this morning, I didn't bother checking for the weather outside. All I knew was it smelt cold and the sun didn't shine through the blinds. But now that I see a multitude of snowflakes fall onto the heated floor where WEIA personnel were sparring, I knew I should have put at least something a little heavier on.
Nonetheless, I make it towards the rack of bow staff. Alot of them have been missing from their compartments–but it made sense seeing as though many of my peers had the batons swinging in their hands every which way.
Along with the laughter of sparring partners, there was also the presence of judgemental whispers.
The word, ''flake' kept bubbling up. They had quipped almost like an insult. But they all had one thing in common and that was the ending in laughter.
I couldn't exactly shrug off the lump in my throat this time, especially coming from a girl who had only shared a single parent with me.
Vault held her bow staff tightly as she spaced with one of the Alderete brothers. With the hood on their head, I couldn't tell if a buzzcut was present or not. I couldn't have guessed if it had been Dominic or his older brother.
Regardless, her eyes point compulsively in my direction. Almost as if she had wanted to tell me something, I watched her mouth a couple words as snowflakes made great contrast against her black hair.
The words wouldn't register in my mind, so I had simply brushed it off.
Ripping a bo staff from the rack, I had brought myself to the corner furthest away from anyone in a gray wife beater and black arm sleeves. Our training uniforms didn't do good against the snowstorm crashing onto us. I guess the heated floor had served some kind of purpose at the moment.
I inhale the cold air slowly.
My chest is already heaving in hurt before I grip the middle of the baton and twirl it once. I didn't really have any experience with batons of any sorts. It had always been knives with me.
Blades over bullets was how I counted it.
But I mean, a bo staff had the same mechanics as a katana, right? How hard could it have been?
My stance widened, the soles of my feet feeling the effects of standing in one place on the heated platform for too long. I had to keep moving.
By alternating in two places compulsively, I still opted to stay further and further away from my peers. I didn't want to deal with Immanuel's daughter, who I could have heard sniggering from here.
I gripped the ends of the baton like I would one of Tenzin's knives. But at the sound of muted laughs, I mentally retracted that decision.
I had decided to keep twirling the baton until my wrists would have eventually given out. It was mandatory that I'd be here after so long, might as well purposely pass the time by doing the bare minimum.
A good two hours pass and I have almost completely gotten comfortable in the position I'm in.
When I actually thought I was getting the hang of this, the eerie silence that rang behind me had been pausing and looking back. A double-take was to be done because everyone had seemingly stopped sparring with their partners, and stared straight at me.
Arms crossed over their arms, I took my standing in an awkward stance with the bo staff in my hand for the crowd to laugh and point at me. I made the stupid mistake of looking back to see what they were laughing at, probably one of the lower ranked security guards getting chased by a pitbull again but no.
They were staring at me.
I shifted uncomfortably as the soles of my feet began to rise in temperature. My shoulders had begun to slump. I felt heat rise up to my cheeks.
'' Oh god, look at that posture! I would have been a much better candidate for the priority than Flakey McCorn flakes over there,''
'' Clearly Tenzin's fighting genes didn't pass down to her. Damn waste of DNA bruh,''
'' She isn't worth those swords,''
'' Maybe if she wasn't such a flake she'd be worthy of her father's love,''
'' Maybe if she wasn't such an overthinking pussy—she would have been able to pull the trigger.''
'' Maybe the blonde hair dye had gotten to her brain cells,''
'' Wasn't it her natural hair color?,''
'' Like that makes her any more useful?''
'' Can't believe this is the same twink who killed the head of the structure four years ago. What happened then?''
'' Oh yeah! She ran away to the looney bin to avoid direct repercussions,''
'' Guys relax, My father just wants her on the mission for a test drive. He wants her dead, that's the point. He knows she'll fail, but she's a test dummy and we always need one before the real soldiers step up to the play, right?'' Vault's voice rings in my ear as well as the hums in agreement of that fact all around me.
The lump in my throat began to grow as I glanced up at the crowd at least trying to search for my family. The guy in the hoodie who had been sparring with Vault earlier shakes his head, the fabric hiding his eyes from me.
Still, with the bo staff in my hand, I begin to hug myself. The thin material of my arm sleeves makes it harder to feel warmth beneath winter winds. The agent however clears his throat.
'' Valeria please,''
Damien begins, pushing the hoodie off his head, kiwi eyes shining down the girl a foot shorter than him.
He shoves his tattooed hands into the pockets of his dark cargos, '' Do something better with your life and actually try to make your father love you more than your sister,'' Little by little, the floor became wider and the focus shifted from me to Vault.
From the way she turns, I can't see her expression. But the way her head moves, I can only assume she's raising her eyebrows in audacity.
She crosses her arms,'' How about you do something better with you life and continue downing those baby pills you take scheduled, yeah?''
Eyes shift towards Alderete.
He squints his eyes, but just slightly. His Spanish accent threatens to slip out with every grimace Immanuel-Noah Santiago's daughter emits.
He leans in, nearly breaking his neck by the height difference. Still, his stance remains the same.
'' You're lucky you're something along the lines of a girl.'' He almost spat. Anyone could tell his dialogue had been unfinished.
As if possible, he leaned even further into her ear only to whisper loudly, completely rejecting the point of leaning in—in the first place.
'' You're even luckier, irrelevant eyes are watching me right now,'' At the drop of words, footsteps come at an even slower rate.
''Santiago!'' I heard Reese's voice ring through the crowd. They all turned to her. Leonidas is not too far behind. She too was in a training uniform, which confused me further.
She descended the steps, green eyes pining my half-sister until she was adjacent to her.
Her being 5'10 and Vault being somewhere on the 5'6 scale, she doesn't hesitate to tower over her.'' I'm hearing a lot of talking from someone who can't spell restaurant without stuttering"
She shifts weight from one leg to another, '' Why can't you just stay in line and do as your told?''
Vault's shoulder's chuckle along with her,'' I have freedom in the southern headquarters. My father—''
''---is more irrelevant in this situation than ever.'' She doesn't give Valeria the floor to talk.
Not to mention; less important than Tenzin when he was alive and Oz's grandfather.'' Vault's shoulders slightly slump as her pride wavers very slightly, ''You know her grandfather? The man who made all this shit happen?'' She refers to the agency before nodding,
I see her lick her lips as I loosen up a bit. Damien grazing my hand at my side. '' That's what I thought, It's silent.''
'' Try that with the younger much shorter youths instead of someone who's damn near 6 foot.'' She pauses, her dark-brown curls being a nest for hale and snowflakes in the process.
Wind whooshes, occupying the silence.
'' Better yet, try atleast counting the amount of coke profit your mother made in that drug house of hers.'' Confusion is seen gracing the faces of the many peers who stand around them. But when Narissa nears Vault, she whispers so faintly no one could have heard from where they were standing.
I did manage to read a ''I know about what you do,'' on her lips before she retracts back.
Vault whips her head back at me, a weary look on her face before she blinks downwards.
''Guys relax, y'all know Vault can't add up anything past her body count,'' Dominic's jaw moves as he chews.
'' What was it? 7? One for everyday of the week?''
Unexpected laughs begin to round the perimeter of the scenario. I find myself looking down in a smile before it slightly wavers at the voice it belongs to.
He hissed, shaking his head. '' You really took that Jungkook song seriously, props,''
It was fair to say, the more I had leaned into Damien, the more of a comfort he became in the scene where his brother had been shirtless in a winter storm in the eyes of the agent's training.
With a piece of bread in his hand like he was bulking, he walked down the steps to the terrain. His tan skin forces snowflakes to slide off slickly as if he were a heater himself.
But I know his ass was shivering.
He made sure to repeat the 'Lunch is ready,'' in order to force all unnecessary eyes inside.
The younger range of female agents as well as highlighted males had their stares linger for much longer than necessary. Until the youngest Alderete spoke again.
'' Shoo heathens, their gonna take all the chicken,''
It was as if magic had been displayed the way the students had disappeared at the sound of that.
Vault on the other hand, stumbles on her steps. Making the effort to look back at me, her mouth moves.
'' We need to talk,'' leaves her mouth before she joins the rest of the students inside.
▄︻テ══━一💥
I didn't feel the need to stick around and chat with Reese or the twins. It took me a while to tear her away from me in the hug, but eventually, I took on my stroll for a walk.
But because it was too dangerous for me to be alone, especially in an area where blackstar associates would report my every move as a wanted face, Damien had security tailing me from a fair distance.
I couldn't count exactly how long it had been since I left the terrains of WEIA. All I knew? Black SUV's were following me from a distance, familiar security faces shining through the dashboard as I awkwardly waved in their direction.
The snowstorm faltered just slightly in intensity. Didn't make the wind any warmer. With my hands into Damien's pocket, did I just slightly raise my head at the store causing light reflections on the snow.
It had been an insanely bright orange glow on the ground coming from one of the stores. The faint smell of sweetness led me near the window of the store. Daylight savings has been doing way too much lately for it to be around 5 and pitch dark outside, but regardless, I latched onto the handle of the flower shop before swinging it open.
Snowflakes flew past me as I entered. But the contrast from inside to outside made me raise an eyebrow. The ceiling had been green, grass hanging off every inch along with hanging lights.
A diffuser I had noticed being pushed to the side, smelt of fresh rain. My shoulder's visibly fell at the sight of the man behind the counter trimming off a little perch of bonsai.
Sasha tongue stuck out in concentration. All I could have done was push Damien's hoodie. I shivered as a chunk of snow slid down my back. But regardless, I had just leaned on the doorframe, simply just waiting for my old friend to acknowledge my presence.
It took a beat to realize his focus wouldn't have torn itself away from the baby bonsai he was trimming, so I had decided to take matters into my own hands. No matter how loud my footsteps clearly sounded on the sage green carpet.
It didn't take long to find a cherry blossom display on one of the top shelves. It had been a plastic model, so little to no damage could have been done here.
I dragged it down with me after shrugging off the snow on my shoulders before thundercunting the pot towards Sasha's head. But then, he moved his head to the side the moment the object flew out of my hand. The silicone crashed against the wall behind him.
My hands fell at my side, Sasha still wouldn't have looked at me. If anyone could have provided a distraction worthy of lasting in my mind, it was him. So I said something.
'' Acknowledge me, Trusova." The Russian faintly paused.
Glanced up from the tree for a split second before going back to cutting. Nothing but the harsh cold winds outside are the only things occupying the silence until he chuckles under his breath.
'' What happened to, Sasha, Corinelli?'' I near him as his dark hazel eyes pin me now that his bolt scissors have been tossed to the side.
'' What happened to saying 'hey' to me from miles away?'' I watched as he put the baby bonsai on top of the shelf just above his head. The muscles beneath his dark blue tight fitted shirt are revealed along with the thin gold chain that hangs off his neck.
It might have seemed like it had broken off a lot in comparaison to what he wore four years ago, but I knew it was one of his most expensive ones. I followed as he made his way towards the open area between the counter and the open area.
I looked down on him as his hands unlatched the wheelchair.
He shuts his eyes slowly before peeling them open one by one, '' It's good to have you back, Nine,'' I hold his hand, but I don't couch down to his height. I'd be lying if I said it was good to be back. So I simply changed the subject. My eyes went around the store, seeing the Jurassic shift in aesthetic it underwent in the time of my incarceration.
'' Love what you've done to the place.'' My mouth slightly opened in awe at the amount of gold fairy lights decorated this store. The smell in itself reminded me of the Koi-fish pond first hand and my heart began to swell.
There was no need for nostalgia to hit me this hard in this face. My tattoo however had begun to itch just slightly at the way Trusova clears his throat.
My eyes fall onto him, dirty blonde strands partially covering his eyes from my sight.
'' You're fidgeting,'' He points to my bouncing knee before I even think about objecting. Upon command, I stop the bounce and he raises his eyes towards me again.
'' No I'm not,'' I shrug but he remains as quiet as he was when I first got here.
He turned to face the door before nodding towards it.
'' You hungry?''
'' When am I ever not?''
This causes Trusova to smile ever so slightly.
The sight of his baby dimples makes face before he maneuvers his wheelchair towards the door.
At the foot of the coatrack, I don't do anything like move my feet to tail him out the door. I simply stood and stared.
A deer in headlights.
I had remembered my father was the first to bring Trusova within our house, wheelchair and all.
Tenzin's first and only mistake had been buying a house a little too close to one of the western banners, so when it came down to the underground war on opposite ends of the spectrum, Alexandre-Malcolm Trusova had become an innocent bystander.
He had gotten shot within the thoracic. Square, I've never seen him walk again.
But as he turns to me with a bright smile, signaling me to join him outside, it only makes me cock my head to the side at just how content he seems despite the unexpected hitting him.
Literally.
There had been no way I could have hid anything from Sasha. He had lived under my father's roof long enough to be considered a blood relative. And so, with everything from the flaking at the hospital with Naomi, to Vault's taunt at the terrains earlier today, he took it upon himself to pick up the tab of the pizza we ordered.
The restaurant had been lull, the scenario dark, hanging lights flew off somber wooden material above us, causing a great contrast. But I couldn't focus on it nor did the manager compulsively look at us behind the counter.
My mind had simply just filled with regret, just how much shit and mental strength did it take one person before they scratched their breaking point?
The anxiety came creeping back and suddenly my hunger was lost.
Trusova noticed the way I had picked off the pepperoni, peeled off the cheese and just took small nimbles of the bread beneath it. But he didn't mind it as much as I thought he did.
When I looked up from my side of the pie, he opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something, but then rapidly refrained. He then looked down, took a sip of his rootbeer before shaking his head.
'' It wasn't your fault,'' He reassured me quickly.
But I countered just as fast, '' It's both of our fault.'' I paused, making myself comfortable in the chair.
'' I spoke a big game and couldn't even live up to it at the only chance I would have to be alone with her, and Nine hesitated,'' My head tried so hard to replay the interaction all while I was trying to distract myself.
Slowly, beneath the table, my hands had begun to shake.
'' You just weren't ready, and that's completely okay—'' I chuckled breathlessly.
'' That's not the only point."I began to feel almost aggravated.
"Immanuel was right and it's driving me crazy by how much. What if he is right? What if I fail this mission and years of work is spilled down the drain,'' He reeled back in the wheelchair and sat. Clearly in thought.
'' Is that really the worst scenario he could think of? Would your death not be bad news enough?'' He was cautious enough to ask, but in the same breath ignorant considering he knew a little something about Corinelli's character.
I made a slight face, but it fell quickly.
'' Priority over puppet, always. '' I blinked as if I were reciting his words in full, '' I'm the puppet but he holds the scissors ready to snip by strings off considering how fast and intense he wants me to join my father.'' Trusova frowned his eyebrows in disagreement.
'' I hope you understand he only says that because your character has remained the same since Tenzin was alive,"he retorted.
"You always had your father to draw the map for you, speak for you, think for you—'' He leaned in, tattooed hands on the auburn table.
'' Lead for you,''
'' You've been in a static state since even before your incarceration, Oz. Try to change that; once you do, the chokehold Immanuel's words had on you back at the hospital won't faze you— because you won't relate to it anymore.''
This time, it may be my turn to reel back into my seat. I let his words marinate in my head, a smile threatening to creep up. I lick my lips to moisture, '' How do I do that?''
He shrugged lightheartedly, '' Usually, you overthink. Try being more impulsive and see how that works out for you,'' I raise an eyebrow and steadily just look into his eyes for a moment.
I blink.
He blinks.
After a moment of silence, I speak.
'' So you mean... be more stupid?'' He snaps his hands in front of me like he just solved it.
'' Bingo,''
'' Why tho—''
''You want to know why your father was so feared by the underground, on both sides?'' He doesn't give me time to speak.
'' It's because people labeled him as a 'stupid' piece on that board,'' He paused.
"Stupid in underground terms had been the equivalent of madness. He was unpredictable in the same way he was underestimated because of his child-like character. It made him so dangerous because of how impulsive he—-himself was." He takes another sip of his carbonated beverage before snaking his lips twice.
"You've never actually tried to imitate your father besides the way he held his knives, correct?" My mouth hangs open like a fish out of water as I shake my head no.
It was at this moment I had seen the most beautiful smile a single man could have ever flashed me.
Almost as if his eyes lip up, his tongue grazed his pearly 32's softly making a sound.
"We'll go to his house if you're up for it," My eyebrows raise in surprise.
I haven't been back to the house that raised me since his assassination. I never brought myself to remember the exact address, it was a minor aspect of a bigger worry.
I never brought myself to actually enter the house again.
"You've been to Ten's house since he—"
"Who else would have fed the Koi? Your ass was in the slammer." he waved me off as I laughed. It wasn't like a fake chuckle or anything, but genuinely did I have some type of positive emotion bloom in my chest.
But soon enough, " We'll work on that development, Nine I promise." He states before going back to his previous words.
I can't help but compulsively glance between Trusova and the manager behind the counter looking at us longer than appropriate.
I take the opportunity to trail down his gloved hands only to see that he was tatted.
A familiar symbol on the inside of his wrist as he packs straws into their case. Slowly, my eyes widened.
I look back at Trusova whose eyes aren't focused on me anymore, rather the reflection of the window behind me.
Despite noticing as well without turning his head back, he continues to speak.
'' Stupidity overshadows fear." The manager begins to halt his movement, slowly reaching into the pocket of his white apron.
"And—-" I see the end of a handle stick out.
"Because the stupid can't comprehend that concept–by default and in return; they fear nothing. '' his tone raises a little louder this time, to make sure he's heard.
...but a moment too late as the manager pointed the gun and shortly after, it sounded.
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A/N : 💋 thank you for reading this chapter!