For the first time since she came to stay there, Kimmy became more animated and excitedly rushed inside the house where she searched for John, to show him her latest drawing from her art class. He was usually either in his room, working on homework, or helping Ben. But he always stopped what he was doing to look at what the kid wanted to show him. Maybe not right away and sometimes had to tell her to give him a second, or even a minute. He seemed interested enough.
Ben and John had especially hit it off with each other. It was nice having another guy in the house after having mostly girls for a while. He helped show John how to fix his own car and John frequently helped in the kitchen. Though, he also helped Kayla as well, whenever she made dinner, and breakfast on the weekends. His adopted mother had taught both him and his adopted sister to cook and help out whenever possible.
Claudia was mostly at school or work, so most of her contact with John was in the morning. When she was there at the house on a day or evening off, she mostly kept to herself. However, Claudia would offer to ride bikes to the store since John also had his own bike as well. He accepted the first couple of times, but declined after a while, not wanting to listen to the teen girl's negative outlook on life, and only received pushback when John offered a positive spin or advice. He stayed kind whenever they crossed paths around the house and never showed any disrespect towards Claudia, for it. He even went out of his way to be helpful to her. Claudia returned the kindness for the most part, but after the rejection, the sarcasm was turned up a notch whenever their paths crossed.
At least John was liked for the most part by almost everyone, including Grandma Joy, as well as Ariel and Oliver.
Ben and John, on the one hand, continued to grow closer together, bonding over sports, too. Like him, John wasn't a top athlete. As a little kid, his father was an avid sports watcher, so John had a lot of nostalgic memories of watching football, baseball, and basketball together. Football season was over, but Ben and John watched the Suns play almost every evening.
What had begun as something between Ben and Kimmy shooting hoops in the driveway, John joined in, accidentally taking over when the men got into a one-on-one match. The kid would watch for a moment before heading inside through the garage. That had been another reason she had gone out of her way to ignore John. When they made up, Kimmy tried to stick around a little longer, having been enjoying when she and Ben played basketball. Sometimes the ball would get passed or bounce near her, while other times, they got too far into a game and Kimmy left the guys to it.
Mid-February, Ben was kept busy preparing for Kimmy's six-month review hearing, making sure his report was ready to send to Leonard, and the siblings' GAL, Susan, who came by to meet Kimmy and visit with her before the hearing.
One thing of interest Ben shared with both Leonard and Susan and highlighted in his report were the few words Kimmy had uttered to Kayla. Not once, but twice. Maybe it was his darn stubborn pride, but Ben could not help but feel a hint of jealousy. It would make sense the kid would feel comfortable speaking to Kayla over him. Though, lately, it seemed like the two were getting along and Ben hoped he would be next. He made sure to leave it out of the report, though.
At least it was a start for the kid.
During the meeting, Susan explained so Kimmy could understand who she was and her role for Kimmy and her brother as an advocate.
Susan also asked how Kimmy liked staying at Ben and Kayla's house, how things were going there, and about school. Kimmy communicated through head motions and shrugs, nodding the most when Susan asked if she liked everyone there.
"Is there anything important you want the judge to know?" she eventually asked to wrap up the meeting.
Kimmy thought for a moment, staring at the floor. But she could only shrug. Of course, she wanted the judge to know she wanted to go home with her brother. But wasn't sure how to communicate that to Susan without speaking.
Susan then suggested if Kimmy would like to attend the hearing, encouraging the kid she should be there. Even though Kimmy wasn't required, Susan always wanted her clients involved, to keep them informed about what was going on and to help teach them how to find their voice, and in Kimmy's case, she felt it was definitely needed.
Kimmy thought about it and eventually agreed to be there.
John came downstairs while Susan was packing her shoulder briefcase to leave and made the suggestion to Kimmy to walk her GAL to the door. Kimmy wasn't sure what the point of walking five feet but did it anyway.
Susan thanked Kimmy before heading down the walkway, where she parked on the street.
-- & --
The morning of the big day, Ben ran John to school first. When he returned, he finished getting ready, changing into a blue, button-up shirt and tan slacks.
Kayla took the day off to join Ben and Kimmy, dressing nice for court, as well and helped Kimmy button her shirt. Just as they did for Mary and Miguel's review hearing, Ben and Kayla said a prayer. However, even after, Ben still felt nervous. He couldn't imagine how Kimmy was feeling since this was her first, remembering his first court hearing. Ben had sweated through his shirt and constantly kept dropping the kid's binder. Kimmy seemed calm on the outside, but knowing what could possibly be going on, on the inside, he could guess it was similar to his own racing heart.
Kayla drove so Ben could focus on calming his nerves. He took deep breaths, blowing each one out, slowly. At some point, she reached over while driving to gently squeeze his arm.
"Whatever happens, we will deal with," Kayla reminded him, as well as that he would do just fine, knowing that's what he was most anxious about.
Ben looked over at his best friend, taking one last deep breath and letting it out. He glanced behind him at Kimmy, who was staring out her window. Her lips were moving as if she was singing along with Wynonna, probably also trying to calm her own nerves.
God already knew what would happen and would see them all through, no matter what.
When they arrived at the court building, the trio went through security first before being directed where to go. Like Miguel had been, Kimmy was nervous to go through, even after watching Ben and Kayla take their turn. The kid may as well have been sneaking in a weapon or something by the look on her face. It took several minutes before she walked through the security check.
They met up with Mr. O'Reilly outside their courtroom. Being Kimmy's teacher and having helped make progress, Mr. O'Reilly was invited to attend both the team meetings and court hearings. Anyone who worked with the kid, like teachers, foster parents, therapists, etc, was able to attend and be a part of the team to help them succeed.
The adults made small talk while they waited for the rest of the team to show, including Zach's foster dad.
Mr. O'Reilly introduced himself to Stella when he got a chance, sharing how much of a joy Kimmy was in class. Though, he pretty much said that about all his students, he admitted afterward.
"Mr. O'Reilly, here, is the one who figured out Kimmy's struggle to talk," Ben felt the urge to say, swallowing afterward and wishing he hadn't.
Thankfully, Stella didn't say anything about it this time. Kayla still nudged his side with her elbow, discreetly, as if to say, "Cut it out."
Eventually, after a fifteen-minute wait, the Dooley case was called. Ben, Kayla, Mr. O'Reilly, Zach's foster dad, and Kimmy followed everyone inside the courtroom and took a seat in the back together. There was another brief wait for the judge to enter while nothing but papers being shuffled could be heard.
Kimmy had been invited by Susan to come sit with her at her desk. She declined, wanting to sit with her foster parents and teacher instead. The room wasn't like the courtrooms on TV. This one was much smaller, and there were more desks to sit at than benches, where Kimmy, foster parents, and teacher sat.
The judge arrived shortly and took his seat at the highest table, facing the rest of the courtroom. He was older like Leonard, with oval, black-framed glasses. His thin hair was white like Santa's, but his matching beard was shaven and combed nicely on his face.
The hearing began with roll call. Everyone took a turn stating who was there and their title. Everyone was expected to speak for the record. So things got stalled when they reached Kimmy. With some encouragement from her foster parents and teacher, and a deep breath like Ben was doing in the jeep, Kimmy mustered the courage to say her name. It was soft and mousey, but audible enough to be accepted and move on to the next person. Seeing Ben also struggle anxiously before her turn helped as well. At least her name didn't come out as a quick yell that caused the poor guy to turn a shade of red while constantly rubbing his palms on his pants.
Not that she enjoyed seeing anybody else struggle.
Kayla rubbed a comforting, gentle hand along Kimmy's back for a moment while roll call finished.
The hearing moved along to the reading of both reports of the siblings. Each report was read aloud by Leonard. Kimmy and Zach had already made significant progress since entering foster care. Kimmy met Ben, Kayla, and Mr. O'Reilly's gaze when they each gave her a proud smile, even though it didn't seem like she had made that much progress.
She couldn't help but smile like a proud sister at how well Zach had been doing. He was sleeping through the night without being restrained. Apparently, his meltdowns were becoming less frequent and further apart, and there were little things, like new words Zach had picked up to communicate more. Kimmy's eyes moistened just listening to the nice things said about her big brother.
Was this how a mother was supposed to feel?
The smile soon vanished however when it was decided he wouldn't be returning home. Stella had been tested both mentally and emotionally, and was determined to be unable to provide the care and attention Zach would need for the rest of his life. Tears flooded her eyes as Kimmy listened to a bunch of stupid adults permanently split up her family.
What did they know? These people weren't around for the past nine to twelve years.
Kimmy nearly jumped when she felt an arm wrap around her and it wasn't Kayla. She peered up at the arm's owner to see it had been Ben.
He apologized in a whisper for only Kimmy to hear, taking his arm back. She was unsure how to respond, leading Kayla to comfort her instead. Kimmy leaned into the woman's embrace but felt guilty for Ben, who only seemed to be trying to help. He didn't seem to take offense to it, though. There was a hint of rejection somewhere in his face.
Zach's foster parents weren't going anywhere and would continue to be his guardians for as long as needed, at least.
Kimmy stole a look over where her mom was sitting with her lawyer. Stella's head was pointed towards the table they sat at. Her lawyer tried to gently take hold of her arm, but Stella shook it away. Kimmy's heart hurt even more and had the sudden urge to run to her mom's side.
The kids' part ended on a positive note. Kimmy had been evaluated by Nicole and was determined she would be independent enough to be returned to her mom's care. So her part of the case would remain reunification if Stella continued to make progress over the next six months. Unlike her kids, Stella hadn't made enough progress, continuing to give push-back with a few of the requirements she needed to do. She also needed to find a job to be able to support herself and Kimmy but was finding it difficult with the child abuse charges on her record.
With everything that needed to be discussed said and done, the hearing was adjourned for the preparation of the next case.
Ben, Kayla, Mr. O'Reilly, Zach's foster dad, and Kimmy were the first ones to leave while the others packed up their files and paperwork.
Ben watched the kid try to wipe her eyes dry only for more tears to replace them. He tried to help point out that at least she still had a chance to go home, but it was stupid when their family wouldn't be whole ever again.
"His foster parents seem nice," Ben said, continuing to dig his foot deeper inside of his mouth.
Kimmy went over to wave good-bye to her mom, who ended up walking out to the parking lot with their group.
Mr. O'Reilly needed to get back to school. "It was nice to have finally met you," he told Stella and told Kimmy he would see her in class tomorrow when Ben let him know she wouldn't be there today. Anything emotional like a court hearing, Ben and Kayla never made the kids go to school the same day.
Stella had to catch the bus, so mother and daughter finally waved good-bye until Sunday. On their way out of the building, Kayla had tried to encourage Stella, but it felt too much as if she would never see Zach again. There would still be visits, of course. But, knowing she couldn't have her son back felt like having her heart ripped out.
Kimmy had slipped her hand in her mother's to give it a comforting squeeze, reminding Stella she would still have her, at least.
Kimmy quietly sat in the very back of the jeep, listening to Wynonna's song, Rescue Me. Even though things weren't bad where she was and she liked everyone there, Kimmy hoped to hear she and Zach would finally get to go home. That didn't happen and she would have to wait another six months. And even then, to know her brother would never get to come home. He may have been a pain at times and Kimmy wished she had a brother who could play with her, Zach was still family.
She folded her knees to her chest and hugged them tightly as Kimmy sat sideways in the seat, wishing Jesus would rescue her like everyone was telling her he would do, including Wynonna.
Ben and Kayla took her to lunch, but Kimmy wasn't in the mood to eat much. So Kayla requested a to-go box for her.
Once they got back to the house, Kimmy headed straight to her room where she watched her YouTube videos for a few hours.
It was a rare day off for Claudia, who caught on quick there was something bothering Kimmy when the kid barely looked up from her tablet.
"What's wrong?" She asked, tossing her backpack on her bed and stood beside Kimmy's bed. Claudia placed her hands on her hips. Even though she hadn't been around much anymore, there was at least a brief period in the mornings before school.
"Something happened at the hearing today?" Claudia guessed after a minute, sitting on Kimmy's bed across from her. She took a few more guesses, including that Kimmy couldn't go home yet. That was part of it, but not the whole truth.
Kimmy eventually squeaked out, "My brother never will."
"Never, what?"
She hesitated for a moment, receiving more prompting from the older girl. "Come... come home."
"I'm sure he will," but Kimmy interrupted, shaking her head.
"My mom can't care for him." This was Kimmy's first full conversation the kid has had with someone other than her mom and brother. The more Claudia probed, the more the words just poured out, along with emotions the kid had been holding back these last six months.
The teen looked away to scoff. "Yeah, they love to keep families apart, don't they?"
Kimmy watched Claudia through a film of tears. She looked down at the tablet screen where Kimmy had paused the video on a still image of Stephen and Mal's cat, Kepler licking one of those cat treats that looked like a Go-gurt tube.
It really did seem like her family was being kept apart on purpose.
Claudia shifted, moving to sit beside the kid and wrapped her arm around her, apologizing things turned out the way Kimmy had hoped.
Kimmy dropped against the teen as if she was exhausted. As Kimmy let Claudia comfort her, she couldn't help but notice the overwhelming, fresh smell of perfume. She tried to ignore it, but Kimmy never could handle those kinds of strong smells and it seemed like Claudia had sprayed more than she needed. She had to force herself to push away from Claudia to keep from gagging, which she would later regret.
"I thought you didn't mind hugs?" Claudia nudged her on the arm, playfully.
Kimmy found it hard to meet the older girl's gaze.
Claudia reassured it was fine. "I'm always here if you need someone to talk to." She playfully patted Kimmy's knee as Claudia stood up to move to her bed to do something on her phone.
Kimmy stared at Kepler once again, wishing Samson was up there.