Xalia Squalor; because sometimes being in is not enough

Please Don't Date Another Tortured Actor

I walk to the freak tent the morning after, and say, "How are you all feeling?"
"We're about to get thrown into a pit of starving lions," Violet looks at me, her eyes full of desperation. I can't help her. Kevin looks at me, and says, "Your mum came and spoke to us all last night. She's given us an incredible opportunity."
"My mum?" I ask, "Well, obviously, I knew that."
The contortionist woman gasps, "We're going to throw Madame Lulu into the lion pit to join Count Olaf's theatre troupe!"
My jaw drops, and I have to force my face into a smile. I say, "That is such an opportunity. I really, really think that. However, why would you want ?"
"You are in his troupe-"
"I am his incredibly beautiful, amazingly talented, sort of daughter," I scoff, "Me being in Olaf's troupe would be appalling, and child labour. Now answer my question. Why do you want to be in Olaf's troupe?"
"You're good people," The contortionist says. I laugh hysterically, before having to compose myself. Slowly, I excuse myself, and walk back to the tent. I don't know what I'm going to do for the show.

                                                                                                   ***
I sigh, kicking a rock round the circus grounds. I've refused to go watch the lions eat someone, but I'm desperate too. No, I can't. Olaf suddenly sprints out, gasping, "CHANGE OF PLANS! CHANGE OF PLANS!"
I step into his way, and ask, "Why? What has happened now?"
"Madame Lulu got eaten," Olaf groans, "The orphans are absolutely fine, but I have a small little tiny thing I've sort of got to get done. Want to come?"
I shrug, letting Olaf drag me along to Madame Lulu's tent. Olaf smirks, "Hello, hello, hello. We're burning down this carnival. It's all alight. There is nowhere for you to go. Unless, you want to come with us?"
"Where are you going?" Klaus asks. Olaf snatches a map out of Klaus's hands, and scoffs, "We're going to the mountains. And even better, to the vfd headquarters, where the survivor of the fire is going to be hiding. Right, Xalia, pick up the wolf baby."
I pick Sunny up, and rest her on my hip as I take her to the car. She growls at me a little, and I apologise weakly. It isn't fair, not really. Slowly, I get in the car with Sunny on my lap. She glares up at mum, who sits next to me. Olaf struggles to the car with a box of food, which he dumps in the little caravan we've attached on. He races to the driver's seat, jumps in, and accelerates as quick as he can. He smirks, "Look at us, we're driving into the sunset."
"It's the middle of the afternoon," I scoff. Olaf sighs, "That isn't the point. The point is that we are going to be very, very rich."
Olaf laughs as the gift caravan begins plummeting down the cliff, and out of view. I gasp as Olaf keeps driving, and smiling. He sighs, "That feels good. Not for them, obviously. But for me? So, so good."

We arrive at the top of a mountain, and I sit on a picnic table. It's freezing cold, but I'm in a hot pink snow suit, and I look stunning. The two older Baudelaires, Violet and Klaus, have supposedly plummeted to their death, but I refuse to believe that. They've survived for so long. I don't expect them to die from that. They wont have. Sunny glares at me, and I have to turn away. She must know Violet and Klaus aren't dead. Sunny must know. Mum's voice makes me jump, and she sighs, "Go help Olaf with his troupe. Do something helpful for once."
"For once?" I scoff as I storm over to Olaf. He smiles at me as I sit down on the picnic table next to him, but sighs when he sees how miserable I am. We're sat on the table bit, with our feet resting on the seats. I look at his troupe, who are all sat on the floor, and they stare up at us. Olaf asks, "What's wrong?"
"I've got nobody to talk to," I snap, "I'm stuck on a stupid, cold mountain, and I want to go back to the city. Not even that. I want someone to appreciate me."
Olaf glares at his troupe, who begin all half heartedly cheering insults. Once he see's I'm not having it, he quietens them down, and says, "I appreciate you. You're much better than the girl I met. What was her name? Caramel?"
"Carmelita?" I ask. Olaf nods, and I sigh, "The only reason I know is because mum was going to name me Carmelita she's not been set on Xalia."
I look over at Sunny, who is sat miserably. She blinks at me, and I ask, "What's the plan with the orphan?"
"Dunno," Olaf shrugs, "But can you smell that? T R Y M F."
I tilt my head in confusion, and Olaf sighs, "Triumph."
"Triumph?" I don't argue, "Sure, lovely. Why are your hench people staring at me? I know I'm pretty, but I'd rather not be stared at while having a conversation with my countie."
"You need to stop calling me that," Olaf groans.
"Okay."
"Now, let's-"
"Countie."

"Do you enjoy being infuriating?" Olaf asks. I blink, before saying, "Yes, I do. But I feel like that isn't really a socially acceptable answer, and I don't want to be socially... social? I'm spending too much time with you. What is VFD?"
"No," Olaf shakes his head.
"Yes," I snap.
"No, I'm not telling you," Olaf argues, "They're a secret organisation dedicated to putting out fires which I will not be telling you about. Oh, I hate those freaks."
I look down at the freaks, who are walking off down the cliff. Slowly, I shrug, "At least they aren't part of any secret organisations. Now, what are we doing with your troupe?"
"Catching."
"Catching what?"
"These hands! No, sorry," Olaf sighs, inwardly questioning his life choices, "We're making catchphrases. Do you want to join us, or do you want to spend time with your mother, who has told me she needs a lot of alone time?"
My choices in a nutshell.