ROWAN
I am a coward.
A great, big, stinking coward.
If there were competitions for cowardice, I would win gold, silver, and bronze.
I managed to sneak out of the boarding house and traipsed down the path. Dusk had faded into an inky night— this world had seriously short days— and stars twinkled like diamonds through the abyss. I interlocked my fingers behind my head and inhaled the crisp air.
What if she doesn't remember me?
I kicked a pebble across the ground and watched it clatter against the brick of a nearby home. Something ugly and dark twisted my insides and I felt the strong urge to march back to the boarding home and confess everything.
Ding!
I sighed and looked at the hovering purple screen to my right.
You okay?
"I'm fine," I lied with a massive grin. "I don't care if she never remembers me."
Liar.
I spread my arms out, thankful for the empty streets— even if it wasn't, people would forget me almost as soon as they saw me. "It's true! In every lifetime we've been together, Mango has been insufferable, uh, stubborn, and way too sarcastic for her own good. Why would I care about someone like her?"
Rowan, my dear boy, you rushed over to kidnap her as soon as I told you who she was in the marketplace. You even call her by the same nickname. You even remember her favourite colour— which she told you six lives ago!
"That has nothing to do with anything," I growled, crossing my arms. "I'd forgotten about it until I saw her in a red dress today."
Didn't you reserve the dress earlier?
"Shut up."
You're also planning to give up that to get Vindicta's help.
"I just thought of it in the moment."
You were her apprentice three lives ago. I know you've been planning to help your Mango since then.
"It's purely platonic!" I gritted out, wishing it had a physical form for me to punch.
Bollocks. There's nothing platonic about your feelings.
"I don't want to talk about this anymore!" I exclaimed, slumping down on a bench outside of a pawnbroker's store. I let out a long, slow breath. "How much time is left?"
10 days 16 hours 45 minutes 23 seconds
I pulled out a handful of pearls, expensive watches and necklaces from my pockets— which had a rather useful skill of being unable to be filled— and tossed it at the notification. They disappeared with a soft whoosh. "Give me exactly fifteen days in total."
Ding!
Total time remaining: 15 Days
I hunched over and rested my elbows on my knees and supported the back of my head with my hands. The ground was dry and cracked from the day's heat, but I saw an army of ants marching across to their destination. A few had loads on their backs, others were trying to move scrap food and greenery, and some simply moved round and round in circles.
"I wish I was an ant," I muttered, "then I wouldn't have to deal with this."
Ding!
I looked up, wearied resignation clawed through me like a starving bear.
This is getting pathetic. Go to the Golden Apple Pub and spill your troubles to the bartender. He is friendly and will help you.
"Fine," I groaned, dragging my hand down my face. "Not like I have anything to lose."
I can't wait to see your face when you figure it out.
**
One day, I was going to track down the person who coded the damned system and sock them in the jaw.
When it guided me to the Golden Apple Pub, I was expecting a quaint setting with perhaps a few rowdy stragglers, but mainly occupied by clandestine strangers cloaked in secrets. I'd envisioned a ragged bartender wiping down the counter with a mean look but pure of heart.
In reality, there was a bunch of barely legal adults getting piss-drunk from a few sips of diluted alcohol and slugging each other in loud drawls. Others gave them dirty looks and shuffled closer, but all glares paled in comparison to the fearsome bartender who looked about two seconds away from beating the lot of them up. A tapestry depicting a bloody battle was displayed in a position of pride across the far right wall, and various beheaded animals on the left side. Dull and partially rotted tables and chairs were scattered around the room while dim candles threw caricatures of shadows against the surroundings.
"Hello, Sir." I nodded, sliding a few coins across the grimy bar table. "I'll take... third item from the top of the menu." Its name had too many vowels for me to even bother attempting to pronounce.
The bartender's muscles bulged underneath his white shirt as he pulled out a fresh glass and started to prepare my drink. His beard twitched with every shout from the group and his blue eyes slanted with annoyance. Friendly, my arse.
But, the system hadn't led me astray so far so I decided to take the plunge.
"So..." I pushed my chair on its hind legs in preparation to run if things got ugly. "I've been told I can find a friendly ear for my troubles here. Is this true?" Oh that was so weird I'm going to die—
"Aye, you would be correct." He set down my drink and his harsh countenance softened until it was almost human. "The name's Ben. What troubles your heart, boy?"
I pressed my palms against the wood as trepidation burned inside of me. "Right, well here goes nothing. There's this girl. I've known her for a long time— a very long time, in fact— and she's in deep trouble. Life or death trouble. Now, she's the most irritating person to walk this earth, but I feel a certain... urge to help her."
"Has this girl saved your life in any way? Do you owe her a debt?"
I took a long sip of my drink and shook my head. "Ahem, no, that's the thing. I have no monetary or moral obligation to help her, but I just want to. I even... I even think I could happily risk my life doing so."
"Oh." Ben's tone was grave and his forehead was wrinkled with a deep frown. "I see now. How would you feel if, heavens forbid, the worst possible outcome of the trouble came to pass?"
A world without her.
Something shattered deep within me and hollow hopelessness exploded in my chest and spread numbness throughout my body. A pressure evolved behind my eyes and a bitter aftertaste lingered on my tongue. I couldn't imagine it. I didn't want to imagine it. It made such disgusting and dark thoughts float through my mind— like how I would track down the being who placed her in danger and scorch them from existence.
"No need to respond, I can see it on your face as plain as day." A touch of humour had entered his words. "Why don't you describe this girl to me?"
"Oh, she's quite a character." I rolled my eyes and scoffed, playing with the rim of my drink. "Her tongue is so sharp it could cut down a human with a single sentence." Including me. I thought with a tiny smile.
"She performs her tasks diligently." Admirably, she has not given up once in spite of what the system has thrown at her. "She adores mangoes as well— my money has bled dry from her cravings!"
Resistance slipped through me, slackening me to the bar top. "She always has the same look on her face when she sees one: bright eyes, massive smile and a certain contentment that passes through her as if the universe had aligned to fit that moment."
Countless reminders resurfaced of each excited squeal as she saw her obsession. Despite a different facade, the same pure, relaxed joy resurfaced from within her. Her inner glow of light was as mesmerising as it was frustrating.
"Sometimes, I find myself wishing she would smile at me in the same way."
The words settled in the air and registered in my brain a fraction of a second too late. I blinked and jolted back with an incredulous giggle. "Woah, I think the drink loosened my tongue to the point of insanity there. Is it a truth potion?"
"Only your truth. You seem like a decent chap, so I'm going to be honest with you." Ben scratched his blonde hair. "I think you really like this girl."
20K BREAK
I spat out my drink and wiped the remnants from my chin with a harsh laugh. "Like? I don't. At all. That's part of the problem."
She was brazen and unapologetic. Chasing her through hundreds– if not thousands– of stories and being drawn to her soul no matter what form she slipped into wasn't interest.
It bordered on insanity.
Ben palmed the bar surface. "Lad, then it's obvious you love this girl very much."
"Nonsense. She vexes me too much." Love. The word resounded with my quickening heart beat.
"If she vexes you so, then why are you grinning like a fool in April?"
"I am?" I touched my face and saw, to my immense shock, Ben's words were correct. Heat rose to my cheeks and I averted my gaze from the finality rising in Ben's.
An inkling of understanding started to trickle through me. The pieces were slotting together to paint a picture I did not want to see. A dropping sensation opened in my stomach. No, it can't be.
"Absolutely not." I wrenched my face taut. "It's impossible."
One of the young men broke away from the group and thumped my back, almost dislodging mg lungs in the process. He shouted, "Why don't you join us for a drink, man? I'm sure we can help drown your troubles away."
"I'm fine."
"Ah, come on! Be a sport—"
My irritation culminated to the maximum point and I tossed the rest of my drink into his face. I squared up, prepared for a fight, but he simply laughed and returned to his group while licking the droplets from his lips and chanting free drink!
Ah, to be young and stupid again.
Surrounded by ridiculousness, I tossed a few coins on the table. Ben had a cryptic smile on his face as I thanked him and left the cosy establishment for the cold night air.
The night was young and a strange lull descended over the sleepy city. I shoved my hands into my pockets and stalked the familiar back alleyways. My mind was abuzz from both the alcohol and the conversation and I knew sleep would be a losing battle.
Love. What a preposterous notion. I am not capable of an emotion so pure and wonderful.
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Total word count: 20 385
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Stay safe and thanks for reading :)