A/N:
Alright, ready for part two? I'm not! Well, here we go again. Love you guys!
Any bold lines will represent Jay writing in his journal and any italicized lines will represent a flashback of past events.
......
"Damn it." I looked down at my pocket watch, my brand new and already broken pocket watch. I guess that's what I get for ordering things off the internet. My phone started ringing from its position on the kitchen counter and I just glanced over at it. "To answer, or not to answer, that is the question." I pursed my lips, holding my pocket watch up by its chain. After another few seconds of the incessant ringing, I decided to answer it. "What?"
"Well, good morning to you too." My mother muttered sarcastically. "I need your help up at my office, I don't have enough room in my car for some of the things I have to take out to the fishing tournament and I'll buy you gas if you-"
"Isn't there a little watch repair shop somewhere around your office?" I interrupted, staring down at my watch again.
"Yes, it's just a few doors down on the opposite side of the street, why?"
"I've got some things to take care of, but I'll be up there in like twenty minutes, okay? Bye." I hung up before she could ask me anything else. Might as well look decent if I'm going out in public. I took a quick shower and slipped on some rolled up green shorts and a cream crew neck shirt before sliding on three different necklaces, a leather bracelet, and my high top Sperrys. I grabbed a beanie on my way out the door and was off for the day.
....................
After dropping off my pocket watch, making a quick trip to the bank, and helping my mother transport some bags from her office down to the local marina, I got a text message.
"Come drink with me." I just laughed and shook my head. This girl had been trying to get me out to one of her parties for a while, but I just wasn't feeling it. I stopped at the gas station, sending her a quick "maybe" before pumping my gas.
By the time I got back in the car, I had another new message, only this time it was Ryan.
"Come over and have some beer." I just rolled my eyes.
"As much as I would like to get drunk off my ass with you, I'm leaving for the beach tomorrow and don't want to feel like shit the first day." I typed back.
"Then come sit with me while I drink...drinking alone sucks."
"Why are you drinking?"
"I'm not, yet."
"I'll be there in a bit." I just stared down at the message before I hit send and let out a heavy sigh. We've been talking a lot lately, but just as friends. Ryan was a good friend to have. He looked out for me and even if it was his way of showing that he would never leave again, it was nice.
...................
Another movie ended and took a deep breath as the credits continued to roll. He wasn't saying anything, or moving, or drinking. Something was up with him, and it wasn't just the fact that I was laying here in his arms on his couch. So what if we weren't dating? It was comfortable. And don't say I'm leading him on...because he knows....he just won't accept it...
"What's wrong?" I asked, turning around to see his face. His eyes were staring straight into my very being, that sad look there, hiding behind his beautiful brown orbs. "You haven't touched the beer you set out and that was your third Star Wars movie today."
"So?"
"Normally, you're gushing about these movies more than I am, but instead you're just laying here staring at me."
"I can't help it," a thumb brushed over my cheek.
"Ryan, you said you were done hiding things." I sighed, moving his hand away from my face and sitting up.
"I'm going to tell you...I just don't want to upset you." Oh yay, how considerate. I eyed him cautiously moving up on the couch, but he sat up before laying his head down in my lap and staring up at me. "I was at the beach two weeks ago and I just kind of fell out." My eyebrows scrunched together.
"What do you mean?"
"I went back home and went to the doctor, and they said I have a brain tumor." I just stared at him. Seriously, we make it through everything. We survived all of this ridiculous drama as a couple and even now, when we weren't dating, the world was out to get us.
"It's-"
"Today is my last day in the apartment before I move back home for a while. I'm having surgery soon, but I wanted to see you before you left."
"I can cancel," I nodded, "I can go to the beach anytime...I'll-"
"No more waiting, remember?" He said it so calmly, but I could see how much it hurt him.
"This isn't waiting, Ryan, it's me-"
"There's a chance I'll have some memory loss." He interrupted me once again. I took a deep breath, biting my lip and trying to hold everything together.
"You'll be fine," I nodded to myself. "You're going to be okay." I kept saying things like that while I ran my fingers through his short hair, staring ahead and blinking back the tears.
"I want you to go to the beach and have fun with your friends, I'll be here when you get back."
"But what if you're not?" I looked down out him with fear in my eyes. "What if you forget the last year of your life? Or the last three years for that matter? What if I come back and you don't even know who I am? What am I supposed to do then, Ryan?"
"You could move on from me...for good," he mumbled.
"Don't say things like that," I pulled him up so that his head was on my chest and simply held him there, half in my lap like a child.
"I don't want to forget," he whispered. "I promised I wouldn't."
"What can I do?" I didn't know what I was supposed to do at this point, wasn't sure if anything was right anymore. The man I loved-well kind of sort of who knows anymore-could wake up and not remember me, or worse, he could forget pieces of us. The thought made me shudder. He was one of my best friends, how was I supposed to handle this?
"Stay here," he mumbled into my chest. "Just for a little while longer." I nodded and we entered a long silence. A few minutes later Ryan was asleep, breathing softly in my arms and looking so peaceful. I placed a soft kiss on his cheek before carefully moving out from underneath him and setting his head on a couch pillow. I pulled the blanket up over him and cut off the television before grabbing my keys off the coffee table and quietly locking the apartment door behind me.
I spent the drive home thinking, and spent a majority of the rest of the night over at Sunny's, talking about all of it, before finally going home. The red hand prints on my wall seemed to stand out even more prominently than this morning, causing me to sigh and turn away from them on my bed.
The next morning I got in my friend's car and left for the beach, not knowing when I would hear from Ryan again, but that didn't worry me as much as another question...if I would ever hear from him again.
................
A/N:
So there's Part 2...only one more left before I finally label this book as completed! Are you happy? Sad? Shocked? Confused? Annoyed? Let me know! Comments and votes are more than welcome! xx
-Tay