Kaylee held a damp towel to my bleeding arm. It was sure to leave a permanent scar. We hadn't seen any adults in over an hour. I was exhausted and starving, but I kept my eyes open fearing that once I closed them, they would never open again.
I didn't know where we were, and I didn't have a plan.
Once I observed our surroundings, I knew there was only one exit. The door. The door that was annoyingly placed in the front, near the three adults who were all maliciously plotting together.
It had three locks. There was no way I could get to the door, unlock it silently, get Kaylee out, rush out myself, and run as far as it took without getting caught. On top of that, the vehicle was still in motion. If we jumped and hurt our legs, we were done for. If I jumped and fell on my arm, with the new pain that would erupt, I would be done for. I didn't have much faith.
I knew that the only escape would be once we stopped at whatever set location there was. Then, I would be able to scout the area and make a new plan.
Footsteps approach and I groan certain I didn't have the willpower for round two.
My mother appears but another voice quickly sounds getting her attention.
"Kaila. We need to stop."
"No we're not stopping till we get there."
"If I don't stop, we'll run out of gas in the middle of the road. A cop could come over to help us, see your bleeding child, and then we're fucked."
My mom growls going back to the driver's section, away from our view. I started to deliberate. It was a very slim opportunity but obviously one we needed to take. Who knows how long it would be until our next stop and by then we could be in another country.
"Kaylee help me up." She stands to help me. A sore ache screamed every time I moved, and there was nothing I could do to silence it. I limped lethargically to the bathroom trying to gather strength and feeling in my legs.
I get to the bathroom and turn the faucet on, water came out in an awfully slow stream. I splash my face trying to wake up and take a few sips hoping to rectify the dryness in my throat. On the corner of the small rusting sink I see a hair tie and grab it quickly, pulling my hair into a ponytail that was supposed to help me concentrate. I look at myself in the mirror and saw a mess the size of a train-wreck.
It was a good thing. If we somehow managed to get out of here, people would automatically be alarmed by our appearance.
I shake my good arm and legs regaining feeling, then jump around a bit in place taking deep breaths. "Okay. You can do this Jess." I splash some more water on my face before drying myself and walking out more confidently.
I see Kaylee sitting on a raggedy pillow, radiating exhaustion with her head in her hands.
I squat to her level and lower her hands from her face.
"Listen to me. It's dangerous and it's stupid, but as soon as this gross trailer stops, we are running like hell."
Her eyes bug out at my wild and reckless plan.
"You will be going in front of me. You will not turn back at all. You will not check on me. Do you understand?" She slowly nods tearing up, most likely envisioning the worst.
"If I am stopping for any reason you keep going. Do you understand?" Tears flow down her face but she nods once more.
"I am not playing with you Kaylee, I will never forgive you if you stop and come back for me. If you get away, you go to the police and tell them everything you know. How the car looks, the people in it, the direction we were driving. Everything. But you don't stop." She takes a deep shaky breath wiping her eyes and nodding.
"We're going to be fine." I stand up and pace a bit trying to keep feeling in my legs.
The vehicle stops and I feel my heart stop as well. This was it. My anxiety started to make my whole body heat up.
My mother unlocks the door and moves to exit with another girl I've never seen, probably because she was driving the whole time.
"WATCH THEM." She demands violently pushing the body builder in our direction. I had to think on my feet. He sits right in front of us with his eyes glued to our faces, watching like a hawk.
I plop down next to Kaylee and lean over like I'm telling her a secret.
"She's gone. I'm going to the room." My whisper voice was anything but quiet, and once I saw his eyebrow quirk I knew we had his attention.
I rise, fake yawning, "I'm going to the bunker. Really tired you know?" He immediately stands up and blocks me with strong arms crossed over his chest like I hoped he would.
"What's in the room?" I make my eyes slightly expand for the effect, "Nothing," but answer nonchalantly to avoid laying it on too thick. I try to walk around him but he stops me, "Stay right here. Whatever you're hiding, I'll find it." And he stalks off towards the room.
I look at Kaylee, my eyes signaling her to stand up and get ready to run faster than she's ever run in her life.
He looks back at us and I bite my lip to give off a nervous vibe that said I didn't want him going into the room by any means. He shakes his head smirking, "Idiots."
No. You're the idiot.
As soon as he's out of sight I shove Kaylee and we zoom towards the door flinging it open and jumping down.
"Which way?!"
"JUST GO."
We start to race in a random direction, I didn't care where as long as we got as far away from them as possible.
My calves were hurting, my lungs were burning, and my arm stung as I swung it back and forth but I knew I had to keep going cause this was our only opportunity.
Every time Kaylee slowed down, I pushed her giving her another boost. I heard shouting and cursing behind us but kept going.
"..Kaylee.." I was out of breath, but I needed her to pay attention. "I know... I told you.. to not... look back... But... I need to know... how far they are.. and you're ahead.. of me.." We were both breathing incredibly heavy and though my vision was shaky I saw her nod. I held onto her as she turned around so she wouldn't crash into anything or slow down.
"We've got some distance on them.... but they're getting... back in the trailer... and I— I don't know if we can outrun a car..." I huffed trying my hardest to think on my feet. I see us nearing a few shops and sighed in relief. If we could get in one, we were giving ourselves ten more feet.
"We don't have to outrun... the car. We just need to go... a little further.." And she keeps running, not questioning my demands.
We reached the line of shops and among a nail salon, a few vacant offices, a travel agency, and a barber shop, I spot a gun shop.
Perfect.
"There!" I demand her in a shriek and as soon as we reach it we run in, hearing a pitchy bell chime upon arrival.
"Hey no kids in here." I was out of breath and so fatigued that I almost threw up but the adrenaline and need to survive kept me going.
"We need to use your phone sir, and you need to be ready to shoot." I heaved as I spoke. "What? You're not making any sense kid." I held my chest trying to keep myself from passing out.
"SOMEONE IS AFTER US." Kaylee yells frustrated, knowing I couldn't speak anymore.
"Well call the police."
"WE NEED YOUR PHONE!"
He pulls out his phone with knitted eyebrows and tosses it to her. She quickly gets on the phone pacing, "Where are we?" He throws his hands up, "Delaware." My eyes go wide.
Delaware?! That's like nine hours from home using backroads.
I turn around and see the trailer stopping right in front of the shop. They knew exactly where we were.
Shit. We're screwed.
"Kaylee get back." She looks at me terrified and confused. I push her closer to the counter hoping it would be some kind of protection but there was no way it would keep them from getting to us and there was no way the cops would get here in time.
"Sir you need to pull your gun out, and you need to be ready to shoot." I was still extremely out of breath but I pushed through, my nerves making my body rock.
"I can't shoot anyone unless it's self defense." I saw he had a gun on his hip and I assumed it was loaded.
Kaylee was still shouting frantically on the phone.
I turn to look outside and see both my mom and the very built man hopping out of the RV and scouting the area.
Shit shit shit. What can I do? I'm not going back there. I don't have the strength to escape twice or handle the punishment we would get for escaping in the first place.
I back up, getting closer to the man and the counter pulling Kaylee with me.
Suddenly the body builder throws the door open nearly knocking it off its hinges. I was trembling, a nervous wreck.
The man behind the counter pushes Kaylee and I behind him, putting himself between them and us.
"Move out of the way sir, this has nothing to do with you. We just want the girls." My mom held up her knife and I could tell the man was immediately frightened. I could also tell in that moment that this man has never taken a shot with the gun on his belt, in his life.
They get closer and the man does nothing to stop them— he isn't doing much of anything really, I don't even think he's breathing anymore. Kaylee was nearly in tears again not knowing what to do. I didn't know what other options I had. How could I give us ten more feet?
They take a few more wary steps towards us and without thinking I snatch the man's gun from his holster pointing it towards them. They freeze in place briefly, everyone simultaneously inhaling and it was like time stopped.
"You're not going to fire that gun." My mother mocked me in a voice that sounded distorted as my brain slowed down the clock letting all the seconds tick by and no time pass at the same time.
She takes another step and impulsively, I click off the safety and shoot. The sound ringing through my ears as I close my eyes and stumble back was debilitating.
"Holy shit." And time goes back to normal.
I open my eyes and my mother was on the floor, the body builder crouching beside her.
Kaylee clings to me and I felt her let out a sigh of relief.
The body builder stands up and looks at me with murderous eyes. He takes a step forward and without hesitating or flinching this time I shot him too. It only hit his leg, but he was still down.
"Give me that," The worker snatched it out of my hands and I felt like I could breathe again. We finally heard sirens, I held a hand to my forehead tears starting to fall as I felt the most amazing and overwhelming sense of relief.
Kaylee clung on to me tightly as she cried into my chest.
Police entered with guns raised and scouted the scene, "I'm going to need you all to put your hands up." I put one hand up still holding onto Kaylee with the other. She couldn't be bothered to listen to the officers.
As I looked outside through the glass windows, I saw civilians watching the scene perplexed as multiple police cars show up along with ambulances.
They carry away my mom and the body builder, I hear someone announce her DOA and I had to take a few deep breaths to remind myself it was over. We did it, we survived.
Kaylee held onto me and looked up with watery eyes, "You just gave us another ten feet Jess." I smiled instinctively kissing her head. A female officer approaches us carefully.
"Are you girls alright?"
"My sister's arm is all cut up." Kaylee informs her and I roll my eyes, "I'm fine." She extends her hand to me and I grab a hold of it allowing her to lead us outside. She sits me down on the back of the ambulance and someone else comes over to check my arm, Kaylee lays her head down in my lap while the officer stays to ask us questions.
As I spoke to her all I could think about were Kaylee's words ringing through my head. I gave us ten more feet.
~~~
They brought us back to New York and admitted us to a hospital to make sure we were okay.
I needed an IV drip for a while to replenish my nutrients and electrolytes. Kaylee was fine with just some food and water. They stitched up my arm but other than that we were free from any serious medical procedures.
We had two beds but Kaylee refused to leave mine. As I sat up and Kaylee laid down in my lap eating the sandwich they gave her.
I comforted her since she was racked with chills that weren't due to the temperature, they hadn't stopped since we escaped, the doctors could only do so much.
Gently, I ran my fingers through her hair reminding her that she was alright, "Kaylee I'm sorry." She turned so she was now facing me. "I left my window open. She got in because of me. If I wasn't so stupid—" She immediately stopped me, "Someone stupid wouldn't have been able to get us out of that. And our mother is crazy, she would have found a way in regardless." I half smile at her consoling me.
She grabs a hold of my hand and brought it close to her chest, "I'm really lucky that you're my big sister. Nobody else would have done what you've done." All I could do was sigh as she got comfortable on my lap again.
The door opens and in walks Maria, Greg, and the Gonzalez family.
Maria was in messy tears, "Oh my god, I'm so glad you both are okay." I fake smile not really in the right headspace to start using my voice yet. I didn't want to hear apologies or have a million people ask me if I was alright.
Kaylee turns away from them snuggling into my chest. Maria looks hurt by the gesture but I wave her down, "She's just exhausted." They all look at us with huge sympathetic eyes, "I'm sure you both are."
Jayden comes over to the other side of the bed. He looked exhausted too and I wasn't sure from what.
"This kind of stuff doesn't happen in real life Cortez. It's just you. Nobody has insane parents with the insane need to keep being parents even though they know they're shitty ones." I half smile at his words, "You knew what you were getting yourself into handsome." He didn't want to smile but he did.
"The doctor said you guys could go home." Diego informs me with a weak half smile and I nod not exactly feeling relief.
"Come on."
~~
We get to the house and everyone was there, it was a bit overwhelming. Kaylee wouldn't take her head out of my side, she was glued to me.
I was bombarded by a stream of apologies and people asking me if I was okay just as I predicted. I honestly wasn't in the mood or prepared for it yet, I simply wanted to sleep. I hadn't been allowed to really rest in who knows how long.
Maddie rushes over to me, "Jess I'm so sorry. I should have woken up. I was literally right next to you." Maya joins in, "Yeah. One second you were there, the next you're gone." I fake smile again, I had been doing it so much my cheeks were starting to feel like they'd tear, "It's okay guys. Definitely not your fault." But even after assuring them each a million separate times, they continued to apologize. I was scarily close to having a panic attack.
"Guys please. It's nobody's fault. Just let it go." But they all kept going and I grew extremely frustrated.
"Kaylee say something. Please. You haven't said a word." Maria begs over all the chaos, my head was starting to spin.
"Five people." Kaylee finally speaks and everyone silences themselves, surprised. "That's how many people were in this house while two people, who I'm sure were not very quiet, came in and took us." My eyes went wide. I didn't want to blame anyone because it didn't seem right but what she was saying was inconsolably true. How did nobody notice?
"You guys keep fake crying and apologizing but you don't know the things they did to Jess and the things I had to watch them do." Everyone turns to me and I immediately felt embarrassed. "You wanted me to say something. There you go."
She actually releases me and rushes up the stairs.
"Jess—" Maria begins but at this point I was already pissed, "I told you guys to let it go." And I follow her up the stairs. I enter my room massaging my temples and find her on my bed crying.
"Hey, don't cry." I rub her back to soothe her. She turns around to look at me with red eyes, "The things she said. The things she made you do. The things she was going to make you do. It should never happen to anyone." I half smile and continue to rub circles on her back. "You don't have to worry about me munchkin."
There's a knock on my door and I groan softly, "I'll apologize later, just please go away." I could only assume it was Greg or Maria, the door opens and I rolls my eyes still focusing on Kaylee.
"I don't think you should apologize at all, but if you want me to leave I will." I hear Jayden's voice and turn to see him leaning on the door frame waiting for my commands.
"No. You can come in." He walks in shutting the door before sitting on the bed next to me.
He pulls me close to him and I felt safe and comfortable in his arms. I almost wanted to cry but I didn't.
"I'm fairly scared to ask what happened while you were there." I shake my head not wanting to ever reveal to him how my mother used him against me. It would shatter him. "I don't think I want to ever tell you what happened there." I was curled into him just letting my sister fall asleep on my bed.
"Just me? Or anyone?"
"Well, everyone. But especially you."
"Can I ask why?"
He now sounded extremely concerned and it was exactly what I was trying to avoid.
"She just used you against me... and that's all I really want to say." I knew that he wanted to ask more but for right now he was going to let me just breathe. He grabs a hold of my hand and runs a finger softly over my bare ring finger. "Where's your ring?" I stare at my hands trying to keep myself from feeling an overwhelming anger or sorrow for the loss of my one heirloom.
"My mom took it..." I felt his sympathetic gaze and I knew he would try to distract me.
"Do you think your sister was right?" I huff shrugging, "I mean it is kind of frustrating that nobody noticed. We couldn't scream or protect ourselves because we were knocked out, so I would have hoped at least one person could hear them creeping on the stairs or opening and closing doors." I felt him nod in understanding.
"How'd you get out?"
"Uh... they had to stop for gas. It was my mom and some dude I've never seen. We made a run for it. Found a gun shop. The worker there was a little bitch, my mom was catching up and he was no help— She was going to take us and there was no way I was going back so I grabbed his gun and..."
"No way. You shot them?" He sounded shocked and proud of me and it was amusing but unwarranted at the same time.
"My girlfriend is badass." I roll my eyes my face flushing a bit, "Kaylee was in tears and I was pumped with adrenaline. I didn't want to shoot them but there was no way I was going to be able to spend another minute in that RV."
He hums sarcastically nodding up and down, "So you didn't feel better after you did it? Not even a little?" I scoff like the notion is ridiculous, "If I would have killed them, no." He smirks, "That definitely avoided the question." I smirk in return and move to hide my face with my hair, "Shut up."
I had a kind of care for my mother that would probably never go away, even though she was the sickest and most psychotic person I had ever met she was my mother. But it did feel kind of good to get revenge. Revenge for those years of pain she inflicted on me.
My door opens revealing a very apologetic Maya and Maddie.
"Jess we're—"
"Stop apologizing. I'm serious. I'm so done with everyone apologizing."
They both nod finally understanding.
"Can we come in?"
"Of course you can."
I hear Kaylee snoring lightly and it gives me a sense of relief. She hadn't really slept since we came back.
The girls walk in and take a seat on the floor in front of us.
"You know you guys were on the news."
"I hear they're trying to get an interview with you Jess."
My eyes go wide while Jayden scoffs.
"She would never do that."
"..I would."
He looks over at me surprised, all of them do.
"What? Someone needs to tell the story right. They're probably sitting there saying my parents were mentally deranged and I'm suffering from chronic PTSD. If there's going to be a story out there, I want it to be the truth."
Their expressions didn't change, they were all still shocked.
"My parents were of sound mind and I'm fine. I think people should know that."
They didn't seem to agree.
"Do you really think you're fine Jess?"
"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"
"You were just abducted. Are you insane—"
"Maya." Maddie immediately reprimands her. I wasn't insane, I was fine, but now I'm a little ticked off.
"Maya. It is okay for someone to be completely fine after a tragedy. There is nothing wrong with me for not having anything wrong with me. There is nothing insane about someone going through something and wanting to forget about it."
I stand up and walk towards my room door needing a few minutes alone.
"It sounds like you're suppressing your feelings, and you're going to explode."
I snap my head in her direction furious.
"What do you want me to do?! Act like I'm traumatized so I can fit the stereotype? You can only be traumatized by something that shocks you and my mother's actions did not."
I storm out going downstairs and outside ignoring the calls from my guardians and friends sitting down on the curb. It was frustrating not being taken seriously.
If I would have been forced to touch that man, I would have been traumatized. If I were given more of a beating or been unable to escape, maybe I would have been traumatized. I like to think I outsmarted fate, I jumped through hoops to avoid both things and I didn't like them making it seem like those hoops were for nothing. Yes, I was now a bit on edge. I would probably never unlock my window again and honestly the thought of ever going into an RV or meeting someone who even remotely resembled a body builder was out the window, but I wasn't as bad as Kaylee. Luckily I was old enough to understand certain things.
I was scared, but I would not sit here and cry or be forced to go to a therapist.
I hear the front door open and footsteps approaching me before the person sits down next to me.
"I'm sorry. I know you're tired of hearing it, but I truly am Jessica." Maria starts to speak to me. "I am supposed to be your mother, your guardian. You are supposed to feel safe with me and I ruined that. It will probably never be the same with Kaylee and who knows how you feel."
I sigh laying my head on my knees.
"The first time she took us, we were in the Gonzalez house. Three people in that house. Nice neighborhood and all the doors were locked but they still found a way in. My mother is not a lunatic, she's very smart... and determined. There could have been one hundred people in this house that night and she still would have figured something out. Don't blame yourself..."
I lift my head up again moving the hair out of my face, biting the inside of my cheek.
"And Kaylee doesn't hate you or anything. My sister is just a bit dramatic and traumatized."
I didn't look back at Maria, I didn't want to see her sad eyes or sympathetic expression. I didn't want sympathy. I wanted people to stop treating me like a china doll.
"... and I'm also really sorry... for dragging you and Greg into this. Before you even considered adopting us, I should have told you guys everything but—"
"It wouldn't have changed anything."
I finally look up at her to find her staring down at me. She really was beautiful and even though she wasn't my real mother, I felt closer to her than I ever could with my real mother.
"You are not you without your past. Neither is your sister. And I wouldn't change a thing about either of you."
I tried to suppress my smile looking away from her.
"Not even Kaylee's messy eating?"
"Well maybe that."
I finally roared with laughter and she joins in. We calm down and she pulls me close to her, it felt weird and unfamiliar but I let her hold me, I let myself have a mom.
"You know we have to get you both a psych evaluation right?" I sighed leaning into her, "I assumed that much. Nobody believes me when I say I'm alright." She runs her gentle fingers through my hair, "I believe you. You're a strong girl. You're a survivor." I could only smile in response grateful for her understanding.
I am. I wouldn't have made it this far if I wasn't.