BinibiningMNMG: Happy 6k reads bb's.🎊 We made it this far. Not that far pala. Malayo pa kasi tayo. But at least, we made it here.😊
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DAINE
After nang nangyari'ng pag harana kuno ni fivanne sa kapatid ko ay tanging irap lang ang natanggap nito mula kay gideon. Nilayasan din siya neto at hindi pinapasok sa kubo'ng tutuluyan dapat nilang dalawa.
Kaya ang ending, sa kubo naming dalawa ni jovanne matutulog si fivanne. Jovanne and him, decided na sa lapag nalang sila matutulog at ako naman sa papag. Which is in favor for me since hindi ako sanay na may katabi. Well, not really hindi sanay kasi katabi ko naman matulog ang dalawa since we we're born. More on, hindi ako sanay na iba ang katabi sa pag tulog.
At first, I decided na kaming tatlo ang matutulog sa papag since nakakahiya naman sa kanila. They're international models tapos papa tulogin ko lang sa papag. Pero hindi sumang-ayon si jovanne sa suhestiyon ko. And when fivanne naman decided na kaming dalawa nalang ni jovanne sa papag, mas lalo siyang hindi pumayag.
I can also remember na bigla na naman'g namula ang buong mukha at tenga niya. Kaya we ended up, I on the papag and them on the sahig.
Kanina pa ako pabaling baling ng position sa higaan but I can't find my good spot to sleep on. I'm namamahay. I even counted tulips and sunflower in my mind to make me sleep, pero wala parin.
I shifted my position to the right and look down to see my two companion. They're both asleep, I think.
Fivanne is already clinging to his brother. While jovanne on the other side peacefully sleeping. His mouth even half open and his cheeks is slightly red, again.
Bumangon ako sa pagkakahiga sa folding bed na sapin ko sa papag at dahan dahan na bumaba at nag lakad palapit sa direksyon ni jovanne.
Ngayon ko lang napansin that he's like an angel when his eyes are closed. His brows arched so fine. I mean, bagay sa kanya ang nakataas ang kaunti niyang kilay. My eyes travel down to his nose and it's perfectly fine, matangos. His lips is so red too and I think, it's fluffy and sweet? I mean, his lips is red like a cherry. And cherry is one of my fave.
I chilled from what I'm thinking at dahan dahan nang tumayo palayo sa kanya. Lalabas nalang ako since hindi rin naman ako makatulog. Might as well magpa hangin nalang.
Silenced welcomed me when I got out from our kubo and the cold breeze are soothing to my skin. I walked to the nearest cliff where the people here arranged some table and chairs for us at kinabitan din nila ng mga light's and lanterns for some tanglaw.
I sat from one of the chairs and look up at the sky. There's so many stars and nagkikislapan sila. This is the first time na nakapag bakasyon kami ng mga kapatid ko. Not really a vacation since we came here for work. But, it's different when we where in manila.
Doon sa manila. Bahay, trabaho, trabaho, bahay. Ganun lang kami palagi. We can't visit good places for a reason na ayaw na naming makipag socialize sa mga tao dahil sa nangyari sa amin noong mga bata pa kami. Unless, may kasama kaming trustworthy at malapit sa amin.
Dahil sa nangyari'ng 'yon noong mga bata pa kaming tatlo, we didn't experience this kind of scenery na walang iniisip na may mangyayaring masama sa amin.
This kind of life is the life that we're wanting since that day happened. Yung buhay na malayo sa maraming tao. Walang usok, walang traffic, hindi maingay, at kung may tao man, masasaya ang mga tao.
Masaya naman kami sa household namin, though iba lang sa feeling yung ganito. Yung secure ka sa paligid. Peaceful yet beautiful.
Sometimes I thought na mas maganda yung simpling buhay lang. Away from city. Mas nae enjoy mo kasi yung scenery na nakapalibot sayo. Less population, less stress.
I shivered when a cold breeze envelope me. Pero hindi rin naman nag tagal dahil biglang may bumalot na jacket sa balikat ko. Nag angat ako ng tingin at sumabong sa akin ang mukha ni jovanne.
So. He's still awake? I hope he didn't catch me looking into him earlier while he's sleeping.
"What are you doing here all alone? Tapos gabi pa. It's dangerous." He sat down Infront of me and placed the guitar.
Hindi ko pa mapapansin na may dala pala siyang gitara kung hindi niya nilapag sa gilid nang upuan niya.
I looked away when he caught me staring at him. Nakakahiya. Nahuli niya ako. But before I looked away, I saw his cheeks turned red.
I hummed. "I can't sleep. Namamahay yata ako."
"You should have told me." He said.
"Why?" I confusedly asked.
I mean, why would I tell him?
"So that I can accompany you here. It's so lonely to be alone, you know."
I shrugged and smiled at him, that made his cheeks burned red, again for I don't know how many times.
"It's fine. I found peace whenever I'm alone. And it's kinda relaxing."
Napalingon ako dito ng bigla itong tumayo. "What are you doing?"
"Aalis. You said na you found peace and relaxing when you're alone. So I guess ayaw mo'ng nandito ako. I'm sorry if I'm disturbing and ruining your moment." He sincerely apologize before he passed through me.
But before he could walk farther, I hurriedly grab his hand. I don't know what got into me, basta bigla ko nalang hinawakan ang kamay niya to stop him.
Maybe I don't want to be alone anymore?
I don't know.
I smiled with his trouble look at hinatak siya pabalik sa kinauupuan niya kanina.
"I'm okay. It's fine if you stay here. Your company somewhat feel me okay." He nodded and look up at the sky that I'm watching earlier.
"It's so beautiful right?" I asked him still looking at the sea of sparkling stars.
"It is." He answered.
Lumingon ako dito only to find out na hindi naman pala siya sa mga bituin naka tingin kundi sa akin mismo.
"What?" I asked.
"I said. It is. It's indeed beautiful." He smiled as he looked away and turned his eyes above.
Ano yon? Maganda daw yung mga bituin pero sa akin siya kanina naka tingin?
He teasingly look at me as he caught me still staring at him. "What? Aren't satisfied with my answer?"
I unconsciously nodded. Still thinking kung ano ang connect ko sa mga bituin at sa akin siya naka tingin kanina, when he said that it's indeed beautiful.
He faced me. "I said, it's beautiful."
"A-are we still talking about the sparkling stars?" I even stutter. Gosh.
He smiled. "Who says I'm talking about the stars?"
"H-huh?"
"I'm talking about you. About how beautiful, fascinating, and enchanting you are. You're more beautiful than those sparkling stars. You're more glowing than them." He smiled widely as he cupped my face. "You're beautiful. So beautiful. The word beautiful is not enough to describe how breathtaking you are. You're more than that word. You're way beyond that."
Kumurap kurap ang mga mata ko as I stared at him through his eyes, as he said those words.
Is he, somewhat confessing?
"W-hat did you s-say?"
Best in stutter goes to Daine Morales Alejandro. Kanina pa ako na u utal utal dito.
He chuckled with my reaction as he squeeze my cheeks gently that made it burnt red as it is already red since earlier.
"I don't want to repeat it again kasi alam kong narinig mo naman talaga ang sinabi ko." He let my face go as he grabbed his guitar and placed it in his lap.
"What are you doing?" Finally. Nakuha ko'na din mag tanong without stuttering.
"I'll sing you a song. Hmm. Haharanahin din kita." He winked that made my cheeks burn red.
Ako naman ngayon ang namumula ang mukha. Gosh.
Tinakpan ko ang namumula kong mukha at mabilis na tumalikod sa direksyon niya. I heard his laughed na sinundan ng tunog nang gitara.
I slowly turn around and his wide smile welcome me. I just look at his fingers na ngayon ay nagpapa lipat lipat na sa strings ng gitara.
I lie awake at night
See things in black and white
I've only got you inside my mind
You know you have made me blind
His voice is so beautiful. I must admit that. The way his voice is so malamig and mabini. Bumabagay sa malamig na gabi.
Can't help but to stare at him as he stared at me intently. I watch as his lips open up while singing and his cheeks burn red again.
I lie awake and pray
That you will look my way
I have all this longing in my heart
I knew it right from the start
The song he's playing and singing is one of my favorite song. As this song dedicated to a man. It's so rare kasi for a song na di-ne-dedicate sa lalaki. Karamihan para sa mga babae.
And to think na he's singing this song for me?
I don't know what to feel.
Oh my pretty pretty boy I love you
Like I never ever loved no one before you
Pretty pretty boy of mine
Just tell me you love me too
Oh my pretty pretty boy
I need you
Oh my pretty pretty boy I do
Let me inside
Make me stay right beside you
He sang the chorus as he intently and directly looking into my eyes. I stared at him too. I don't know why, pero hinahatak ako ng mga mata niya para tignan siya.
I want to look away kasi hindi ko nagugustuhan ang kung ano ma'ng nararamdaman ko ngayon. My heart is beating too fast as it normal beating.
I'm a doctor, a cardiologist to be exact. So I knew that, what I'm feeling right now is not because I have a heart problem, but because of something else. And I don't want this kind of feeling.
It's too risky.
Too dangerous.
I hurriedly look away at tatayo na sana nang bigla na lamang nitong hawakan ang braso ko that made me stop from standing. He dropped the guitar gently as he made me sat back from my chair.
Nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang bigla nitong inurong ang upuan nito palapit sa upuan ko. He cornered my legs with his own legs and he locked my arms with his hands.
"L-let me go. Inaantok na ako." I tried to grabbed my hand, but the more I grabbed it. The more that he held it tightly. "Let me go nga kasi. I'm sleepy na."
I tried to make my legs galaw pero mas inipit niya lang ito sa mga bente niya. He also make hatak to my body that made my face dropped onto his well defined chest.
"Ano ba. Bitaw kasi."
"No. Tatakasan mo lang ako."
I rolled my eyes. "Bakit ba kasi? I'm inaantok na nga diba."
I grabbed my hand again pero mas lalo lang humigpit ang pagkaka hawak nito sa mga kamay ko. My legs is locked by his legs too. At hindi ko ma-i-ahon ang mukha ko sa dibdib niya kaya naman naririnig ko ang lakas at bilis ng heartbeat niya.
Our position is kinda awkward. He's hugging me tightly for God's sake. And my fast heartbeat is not cooperating with me.
Bakit ba ang bilis niya din tumibok?
Hindi ko siya tinignan ng ilayo niya ako ng kaunti sa katawan niya. Instead, I look up and make myself busy looking the stars.
Kanina it's so beautiful tignan. Pero now? I can't find the beauty in it. Mas nangingi babaw kasi ang mabilis na tibok ng puso ko kumpara sa ganda ng mga bituin.
"What?" I raised my brows as he cupped my face gently. Making me looked at him.
"Don't. Don't look at the stars, like they are the most beautiful thing in this world."
"And, why is that?" Mataray na turan ko.
"It's making me jealous." He firmly said.
Natuod ako sa kinauupuan ko at hindi ko magawang mag salita dahil sa narinig ko mula sa kanya. Nakatitig lang ako sa kanya at wala akong kahit anong ma apuhap na sasabihin.
My jaw literally dropped with what he said.
He's jealous? Sa stars?
Baliw naba siya?
I just look at him and can't find any words to say. Bigla akong na pepe sa biglaan niyang pag confessed, pag amin rather.
Second passed by, as I realized na sobrang lapit na pala ng mukha niya sa mukha ko.
What's happening?
I panicked when the distance between us begin closer and closer as he closing the distance.
I don't know what happened, but next thing I know is,
His lips already brushed into my lips.
*****
JOVANNE
Sinundan ko lang ang papalayo nitong pigura bago ako napa pikit at napa buntong hininga.
Ang gago ko.
Sa lahat ng pwedi kong gawin, yon pa talaga.
I frustratingly ruffled my hair as guilt eat my system.
"Ang gago mo jovanne. Bakit mo ginawa 'yon."
Para akong baliw na pinapagalitan ang sarili ko.
Tumayo ako at naglakad pabalik sa kubo namin. As soon as I walked into our room. Nakita ko kaagad ang nakahigang si daine.
I knew he's still awake. Kaya naman dahan dahan akong naglakad palapit sa direksyon niya.
Umupo ako sa gilid ng papag kaharap ang likod niya. Nakatalikod siya sa direksyon ko kaya likod niya lang ang nakikita ko. Pero gaya ng sabi ko kanina, alam kong gising pa siya dahil sa sunod sunod at marahas niyang pag hinga.
"Sweetie."
He shivered as he heard me calling his pet name. He didn't bother to look at me kaya napa buntong hininga ako.
"Are you mad because of what I did?"
He didn't bother to voice out pero sunod sunod naman siyang umiling for response.
"You're not mad?" I just want to make sure. Umiling siya kanina sa tanong ko. But that doesn't mean na hindi ang sagot niya.
Tumango ito. "I'm not."
Naka hinga ako ng maluwag as he answered and cleared my thoughts.
I gently put my hands into his exposed shoulder at hindi nakatakas sa paningin ko na nagulat siya sa ginawa ko.
Dahan dahan na binawi ko ang kamay sa balikat nito at muling napa buntong hininga.
I don't want this kind of feeling. Pakiramdam ko may nagawa akong masama kahit pa sabihin na hindi naman siya nagalit sa ginawa ko.
"You sure, you're not mad?" He nodded. "Then, would you mind if you'll look at me?" Malambing na turan ko.
Hindi ito sumagot pero dahan dahan naman itong lumingon sa direksyon ko. Madilim man pero hindi nakatakas sa paningin ko na basa ang magkabilang pisngi niya.
Shit. He cried.
"Hey! Don't cry sweetie." Pinunasan ko ang basang pisngi nito. "I'm sorry."
Tumigil ito sa pag iyak at biglang tumalim ang mga mata. "You're sorry? Why?"
I saw pain in his eyes as he asked those. He misinterpret.
Sunod sunod na umiling ako. "No. No. That's not what I mean sweetie." Bumuntong hininga ako bago ito muling tinignan na matalim parin ang tingin sa akin.
"Then, why are you saying sorry?"
"Listen sweetie." I gently cupped his face. "I'm saying sorry because I felt that I disregard your feelings, not because hinalikan kita. I'm not saying sorry because I kissed you, but because hindi ko inisip ang mararamdaman mo. I'm guilty kasi pakiramdam ko nagawan kita ng masama at na invalidate ko ang mararamdaman mo. I'm sorry, hindi ko naisip na baka masaktan ka or baka you'll feel uncomfortable dahil sa ginawa ko. It's like I took you for granted. I'm sorry. "
Hindi ito nag salita at mataman lang akong tinitigan kaya naman mas lalo akong kinabahan. His silenced is killing me and made me overthink things.
"I'm sorry. I don't want you to feel bad dahil sa ginawa ko, pero sana hindi mo isipin na ginawa ko 'yon kasi hindi kita nire respeto. It's not. I respect you. And I knew what I did was wrong, I kissed you without your permission. I crossed the line. I'm sorry. Pero gaya ng sabi ko, I'm not saying sorry because I kissed you. I'm saying sorry kasi alam kong mali ang ginawa ko."
He looked at me. "If you know na mali, then why did you do it?"
I shooked my head. "Because I felt like I want to do it." I honestly said that made his brows raised again. "Don't get me wrong sweetie, when I said I felt like I want to do it, it's because my mind keep telling me to kissed your kissable and red lips. Your lips is tempting me to kiss you."
"So. Kasalanan pa ngayon ng labi ko na kissable at mapula siya?" Mataray na tanong nito.
"No. Kasalanan ko kasi hindi ko napigilan ang sarili ko na halikan ka. Kasalanan ko kasi na tempt ako sa malambot, mapula, at matamis mong labi." I covered my mouth when I realized what I said. Sa isip ko lang sana sasabihin 'yon pero na voice out ko pala.
Pa birong tinampal nito ang bibig ko ng tanggalin ko ang nakatakip kong kamay.
I pouted because of what he did.
Bakit naman tampal? Sana hinalikan niya nalang.
Erase! Erase!
Ano na naman ba 'tong naiisip ko.
"Ewan ko sayo. Kung ano anong lumalabas sa bibig mo. Babaero."
Tumalikod ito at nag talukbong ng kumot. Tarantang hinawi ko naman ang kumot dito, only to find out na tinatawanan na pala niya ako.
"Why are you laughing?" Inis na turan ko.
His brows arched. "What? E nakakatawa 'yang itsura mo e."
I rolled my eyes. Pinag ti tripan niya ako.
"Sorry na kasi. Bati na tayo huh?"
"Ayoko." Umiling pa ito.
"Ehhh. Bati na kasi tayo?" I even do the puppy eyes kasi alam kong no one can't resist my eyes. I also pouted.
Tumawa lang ito. "Muka kang aso na pato."
Umungot ako. "Bati na tayo huh!"
"Oo na. Kulit mo. Matulog na nga tayo." He grabbed the comforter and covered his lower body.
Tumingin naman ito sa direksyon ko ng hindi parin ako kumilos at naka upo lang sa gilid ng papag habang nakatitig sa kanya.
"What? Aren't you going to sleep?" He asked.
"Sa tabi mo?"
"Bakit? Gusto mo ba sa labas matulog? Pwedi naman!"
I didn't make him say more dahil kaagad na akong humiga sa tabi nito at nakipag share sa kumot nito.
"Makikipag share ka talaga ng kumot? You have yours diba?"
Umiling ako. "Nah... Na kay five ang kumot ko." Tinuro ko ang kapatid ko na mahimbing nang natutulog habang yakap yakap ang kumot ko.
Dahil nga hindi siya pinapasok ni gideon sa kubo nila kaya wala siyang nakuhang gamit na pantulog, kaya kumot ko nalang ang ginamit niya.
"Whatever. Just sleep jovanne. And please, wag kang malikot."
"Okay." Tugon ko bago hinubad ang t-shirt na suot ko. Hindi ako sanay ng naka damit.
Tarantang tumingin naman ito sa akin at pilit na pinapa suot pabalik ang damit na na-hubad ko. Pinag agawan namin ang damit ko, hanggang sa tumigil kami at hindi nalang niya ako pinilit na mag damit.
I'm kinda hard headed, at ayoko talagang may damit kapag matutulog.
"Fine. Just don't come near me." Banta nito.
I just smiled at hindi ito sinagot kasi hindi ko naman susundin.
Mukang napansin yata nito ang ngiti ko kaya pairap na tumalikod ito at hindi na ako pinansin.
Inayos ko ang kumot namin hanggang bewang bago lumapit sa likod nito at niyakap nito. Nabigla ito pero hindi naman nag salita pa kaya mas lalo ko itong niyakap.
Hinawakan ko ang kamay nito ng masagi ko. Hinintay kong bawiin nito ang kamay pero taliwas sa iniisip ko ang ginawa niya. He let go of my hand para ipatong ang kamay niya sa kamay ko.
I intertwined our hands as I buried my face into the nook between his shoulder and neck.
This is so comfortable.
This is the kind of feeling I want to have for life.
*****
FIVANNE
Nagising ako sa tilaok nang manok at napansin kong wala na sa tabi ko si kuya jovan. I hurriedly fold the comforter and the banig I used before standing up.
Palabas na sana ako nang ma baling ang tingin ko sa papag na kinahihigaan ni doc daine kagabi.
Nanlaki ang mga mata ko dahil sa senaryo'ng nasa harapan ko.
Nakatihaya si kuya jovan habang naka higa sa kanang braso niya si daine at nakasiksik pa sa leeg ni kuya. Ang kaliwang braso naman ni kuya ay naka yakap kay daine.
In short, magka yakap silang dalawa habang natutulog.
Napa simangot ako bago kinuha ang cellphone ko at pinuntahan ang camera. I took ten shots with different angle bago ako nag desisyon na lumabas ng silid.
I looked at them for the last time. And this time. Nag iba na nang position si kuya. Naka harap na siya kay Daine kaya naman mas lalo niya itong na yakap at mas lalo di'ng napa siksik si daine sa katawan ni kuya.
"Sana all."
END-C7
A/N: Hi bb's.😊 Medyo natagalan akong mag update dahil super busy ko talaga. Tinapos ko kasi ang thesis ko dahil malapit na ang Pre-Oral defense ko. I update now kasi, medyo matatagalan ulit bago ako makapag update. My defense will be this coming week. So please, pray for me.🙏😇
So much for that. I hope you enjoy this chapter. As you can see, this chapter focused only to jovanne at Daine. Well, deserve nila ang chapter na'to kasi sila palang ang walang masyadong moment at kung meron man, laging kawawa ang jovanne ko.😆 Kaya ginawang kona nang paraan.
Lovelots.😘
Please leave a comment para alam ko kung may tao ba dito. Let your thoughts out. And if may tanong kayo, feel free na mag tanong dito.
Love you.😘