nine. bird psycho
"Guess who's back, bitches!" Reggie shouted from behind Darren, Quinni, Amerie, and Harper. After the initial jumpscare, they cheered and wrapped their arms around the Wilson boy. He chuckled as he almost lost his balance from the strength of his friends. His eyes fell on Harper's new look and a grin grew on his face. "Love the cut, Harps."
"Thanks, Reg," Harper responded, touching the end of her mullet.
"I see you have that Venezuelan glow," Amerie joked. She shoved the boy slightly. "How was your vacay?"
As the group of five walked into the quad, Reggie hesitated to answer the question, feeling glad that it went unnoticed by his friends, "It was good. Didn't do much but stay in the house."
"Okay, Dusty from Wish," Darren spoke, acknowledging Ant's new look. The Vaughn boy sported a green and white shirt in a checkered pattern with the first few buttons open, exposing his bare chest to the world.
"Yeah, what are your wearing?" Amerie asked. Reggie's gaze met his feet to avoid the boy's eyes.
"It's called evolving," Ant responded. "Someone has to be the hot guy at Hartley now."
"And that's you now, is it?" Darren shot.
"I'm willing to fill any holes I left unattended," Ant smirked and winked his eye at Reggie, when he got a scoff and an eye roll as a response, he spoke again with his eyes now on Harper, "Fine I'll settle with holes left by Dusty."
"Even worse," Reggie declared.
"Don't be mad, baby," Ant called out. "You can just say you miss me and I'll come back to you."
"Wait, Reg, did you and Ant break up?" Amerie questioned, pointing between the boys. When her response was just silence, she let out a sound of understanding. "Did it happen before, during, or after Venezuela?"
"It doesn't matter," Reggie answered. "Even our relationship couldn't help his fuckboy nature."
"What do you mean, "left by Dusty"?" Harper inquired, changing the subject after noticing Reggie's clear annoyance at the topic.
"Oh, what, you didn't hear? Dusty doesn't go here anymore," Spider announced. "I mean, how could he after you KO'd his reputation in front of the whole school? That's, what, two guys youve gotten kicked out of Hartley. First Ca$h and now Dusty. Who's your next victim gonna be?"
"Shut up, Spider!" Amerie spoke.
"At least you didn't get Dusty put in jail," Spider continued.
"I said shut the fuck up, Spider," Amerie proclaimed, pulling a plastic orange gun out of her bag and pointing the barrel at the blonde boy.
"Amerie, no!" Harper shouted. Amerie pulled the trigger of the plastic gun and the liquid inside of it sprayed into Spider's face. The people that surrounded her gasped while Darren and Reggie chuckled at Spider's halted reaction.
The blonde boy licked his lips, tasting the liquid on his face. He looked at Amerie with a confused expression, "Is that salad dressing?" Ant placed his fingers on Spider's cheek and tasted it too, laughing at the Wadia girl. "Oh! He was mean to Harper so I'm gonna squirt him with my Kraft Zesty."
Amerie pushed the boys into Zoe's model of the Sydney Opera House. The girl let out a grunt as the model snapped in half and fell onto the floor in its broken state. Zoe glared at Amerie with hate in her eyes, causing her to apologize quietly.
"Good to see you've done precisely zero selfing-up over the holidays, Map Bitch," Zoe replied. The crowd began to shout hateful words at Amerie.
The students entered the gymnasium for their class picture as instructed by Woodsy. Reggie followed Darren and Quinni as they took their spots on the stage behind the bench. However, when Woodsy made a noise of disagreement, the Wilson boy knew it was done for.
"Reginald, get your butt in the front," she said, pointing at The benches in the front. Reggie groaned before walking toward the open spot next to Missy and taking it.
"Hey, Miss," Reggie greeted. "Did you miss lil old me while I was on break?"
"You wish," she said, teasingly, happy to have her friend back in her life. Despite her attempt at sarcasm, her smile betrayed her true feelings of happiness and excitement.
Reggie remarked, "That grin says otherwise," while Missy rolled her eyes in response. She then playfully punched Reggie in his arm, eliciting a pained wince from him due to her unexpected strength. He rubbed the spot she hit to sooth it of its pain. "You've been to the gym, obvi."
"Yeah, you're weak," Missy retorted. Reggie teased the girl by blowing a raspberry and added insult to injury by commenting on her height, saying "And you're short".
"That's enough, the both of you," Woodsy demanded, pointing at the bickering boy and girl in the front. "Welcome, everybody. Welcome back. Welcome to your home away from home. We've certainly missed you, haven't we, Jojo?"
"Definitely," Jojo added.
"So it's lovely to see all your lovely faces. Now, I would like to introduce very special new students to our school," Woodsy continued. "Rowan and Faran. Rowan comes all the way from Dubbo and Faran is a foreign exchange student from the US. Let's give them a big welcome! Rowan from Dubbo and Faran from the US."
The students began to clap as they welcomed the two new students. The only two who weren't clapping were a brown-haired kid who stood behind him and a chocolate-skinned girl with dark hair, who seemed less than interested in the school already.
"Hey, farmer wants a wife!" Spider yelled from his spot.
"Okay, thank you, Spencer," Woodsy claimed sarcastically.
"Aw, it's giving Morgan Wallen," Missy remarked.
"Keep it country, farm-core," Sasha added, sitting to the left of Missy.
"Calm your farm everybody!" Woodsy yelled. The students broke out into laughter At her words. Spider gave a few more remarks before Woodsy spoke again, "Thank you. We have the photographer for ten more minutes."
A loud bang set off from inside the gym, causing the students to flinch and gasp from the noise. Reggie groaned and face-palmed when he saw who caused it. The man blew the barrel of the gun and held a hand to his ear. "I'm sure that you all remember, head of PE, Mr. Timothy Voss," Woodsy said. "Give a welcome back."
Reggie refused to clap for the man. When he was the head of PE before, the two had a slight rivalry that ended up with Reggie having to do a thousand pushups before the end of the day.
"Where's he been?" Amerie questioned.
"I heard he joined a Russian cult," Quinni spoke up from the back.
"I heard he got suspended for having an OnlyFans," Darren spoke. Reggie couldn't help but grimace and gagged at that thought of the man. "Zaddy Voss."
"Thank you. Thank you, Principal Woods," Voss announced. "Uh, great to be back alongside you in the flesh."
Woodsy chuckled, "It's nice."
"Heard you had an interesting term last term," Voss proceeded with his speech. "Yeah. Looking forward to getting things back on track now that I'm back. So, as I always say... let's get ready to score some goals!"
"Okay, so I've got goals for you," Woodsy said and pointed at the teens. "I'd like you all to have lovely big smiles, your hair nice and tidy, and Amerie, if you could refrain from closing your eyes as you have done for the last three photographs."
"I just forgot my eyedrops one time," Amerie whined.
"Okay, everybody," the photographer said from behind his camera. "And three, two-" "Oi!" a ginger girl shouted while running into the gym. "Anthony Vaughn's chopping his dick off in the quad!"
"Oh, I've got to see this shit!" Reggie exclaimed before running out to follow the girl to the quad. As soon as he was on the scene, he found Ant giving a speech. "Ant, get done from there before you hurt yourself."
"No! My dick causes nothing but trouble. Makes you do stupid shit," Ant clarified, holding a pair of safety scissors in his hand. "Makes people hate me. Like Reggie... my sweet, sweet Reggie. I can't say anything without being called a creep," he pulled down his pants, revealing his white underwear. The crowd that gathered around him exclaimed and groaned. Reggie instinctively covered his eyes with his hands but they were pulled down by Harper rolling her eyes at the boy's attempt. Woodsy called out his name as she tried to push through to get the boy down from where he stood. "My dick is a curse, so I'm gonna get rid of it."
"Somebody get him down from there, please," Woodsy requested, still trying to push through the students.
"Oh no, Miss, he's got a weapon!" Darren cried out.
"He's not really gonna chop his dick off," Harper declared.
"Uh, I am. I totally am," Ant said with sass. He began to pull down his underwear and opened the scissors to prepare them to cut. Students began to chant for him to chop it off.
However, Voss ran and tackled the boy to the ground before he could close them. Ant landed on the grass with a grunt. The students gasped at the impact the two had. Reggie couldn't help but burst out in laughter, causing some people to glare at him.
"Okay, peeps. Welcome to SLT class. Thought we could start off with something gentle," Jojo greeted before motioning in the direction of the art materials in front of the students, "You'll notice a collection of art materials in front of you. So pick whatever medium you like."
Immediately, Darren and Amerie pushed each other to get to the materials. Reggie watched Harper walk carelessly up to the materials and wait for the crowd around them to disappear. Spider's words of complaint were ignored by Reggie's ears.
Harper returned with colored pencils and she and the Wilson boy opted to share them, mainly because most of the colors that Harper had, Reggie wanted and was too lazy to get. Spider sunk into the seat next to Reggie and mumbled, "This is so fucking cringe," while running the tip of the gray-colored pencil over his canvas.
"How would you like to express how you're feeling, Spider?" Jojo asked after noticing the boy's clear frustration.
"Oh, I don't know. Maybe chuck something?" Spider declared. Reggie rolled his eyes at the boy persistently being an irritant. "Punch something? Like-Like, why is this a better way of expressing myself than simply telling you this class sucks ass."
"Because art doesn't involve hurting people," Jojo answered.
"Voss is right. This is kind of bullshit," Spider claimed. "This is exactly why Dusty had to leave the school and Ant had a menty-B."
"Yeah, The little trio of fuccbois is gone and you're irrelevant now," Sasha spoke.
"Men exist. Dicks exist. XY chromosomes exist," Spider said. "It's so easy to blame men, isn't it? But what do you actually do to help fix it, hmm? Like, h-how is this crayon gonna fix it? How is this crayon gonna fix me?"
"Oh, uh-oh," Darren mockingly stated. "Spider's gone and literally pokémorphed into peak incel."
Reggie cackled at their voice, making Spider shoot up from his seat, "That's it. I'm done. No, no, no. I am walking out of this class once and for all, and I'm doing it as a tribute to Anthony Vaughn," Spider glanced at Reggie. "Since it appears I'm the only one in this school who cares about him."
"Fuck you, dude," Reggie spat.
"All of you dudes in here, if you're actually men," Spider's eyes darted at the boy's in the classroom. Amerie let out a dramatic gasp. "Get up! Walk out with me."
"If you leave-" "What are you gonna do?" Spider spat at Jojo as he stood on front of her, challenging her. She held her hand out as Spider got closer, "Go on. Touch me. Fuck SLTS. Fuck SLTS. Fuck SLTS. Fuck SLTS."
Soon, it turned into a chant that all of the boys who followed Spider, all except Reggie and Malakai, shouted in unison. "Toxic masculinity at its finest," Reggie shook his head at their chants blaring in the hallway.
Reggie's eyes were fixated on the dead body of a bird, which was meticulously preserved and placed on top of Harper's bag. The sight was disturbing and perplexing, as he couldn't fathom any of the students resorting to such an unusual form of torment.
"This is so messed up," Amerie declared.
"What kind of psycho would do this?" Darren questioned.
"Spider?" Reggie suggested.
"Rigor mortis has set in. It's been dead about two days," Quinni informed, staring down at the dead bird.
"NCIS: Hartley High," Darren let out before they gagged at the smell after removing their finger from their nose. Quinni pulled out her camera and got lower to the ground to take a picture of the dead bird. "Oh, Quinni, no."
"We've gotta give it a proper burial," Quinni stated.
"All right, which one of you dickheads is the Bird Psycho, huh?" Amerie asked, looking at the faces among the crowd that surrounded the group. She turned to Harper, "It's probably just some idiot playing a joke."
Reggie stood among a group of five people, Quinni, Darren, Amerie, and Harper, in a dimly lit area. Music blared in the background, filling the air with its thumping beats. Reggie raised a small shot glass filled with clear liquid, and as he brought it to his lips, a faint aroma of alcohol wafted up to his nose. He tilted his head back and gulped down the liquid in one swift motion, feeling its warmth spread through his body.
"Olay, so given that there's five of us now, it'd really be helpful for me if we created a list of topics to talk about tonight and then also schedule the topics so we know the order," Quinni explained to the group. Despite his drinking halt, Reggie paid attention to her. "We can move between them organically, but I think it'd be good if we knew that we finished one topic before moving on to the next one. So, for example, the first topic could be Amerie becoming so overprotective of Harper, which is ruining her love life."
"That sounds... kind of complicated," Darren responded. The Wilson boy suppressed his laughter at Amerie and Harper's reaction.
"Oh, we could talk about Reggie and Ant's breakup, if that's not complicated then," Quinni smiled innocently. Reggie's eyes widened, choking on the air in his throat. He coughed while hitting his chest to ease his breathing to normal.
Harper flashed a smile at Reggie as she suggested, "Maybe that's not the best idea," in response to his reaction.
"No, you're totally right," Quinni replied. "Creating a schedule would definitely be too much. Sorry. Forget about it."
"This place stinks," Darren announced after sniffing the air around them.
"Oh. No, it's not the place. It's my bag," Quinni claimed calmly. "The ibis is in it. I'm gonna bury him. I thought it'd be nice if his final resting spot was by the ocean."
Darren couldn't help but gag at the smell once again. Reggie watched as Amerie and Malakai's eyes met from across the area they stood in. A smile crept on his lips after noticing their interaction. Suddenly, the Wadia girl was angrily storming over to Spider and Ant. Reggie tapped Harper's arm and pointed at Amerie. Harper let out a soft curse before the rest of the group followed her.
"You did it, right?" Amerie inquired of Spider. "You're Bird Psycho."
"Here we go. Or, maybe, I'm just not the only one who thinks that Harper's a witch," Spider retorted. Reggie avoided Ant's eyes as the group approached him and his friend. "Enjoy the party, Cheezel Breath."
As he walked away, Amerie turned to Harper, "That dead shit is def Bird Psycho."
"Nah, he's scared of birds," Ant informed them, still remaining despite his friend leaving. He placed his can down before continuing, "Can't even touch one."
"Oh, come off it," Darren responded while holding his nostrils between his fingers.
"It's true. When we were kids, he got swooped by a swoop boy magpie. Took a chunk out of his neck," Ant explained. "Bloke's got like a full phobia now. Birdaphobia, I believe."
"As if," Amerie let out.
Reggie sat on the edge above the bunkers, gazing out into the vast expanse of the dark night sky. The stars twinkled like tiny bright diamonds scattered across a black canvas, each one seemingly brighter than the last. The air was cool and crisp, and Reggie could feel the faint breeze brushing against his skin.
"Mind if we sit here?" Harper questioned from where she and Darren stood beside the boy.
"Knock yourself out," Reggie announced. Harper sat down carefully, making sure that there was space for Darren next to her. She placed her right leg over her left as she drank from her can.
Darren sat down and stared out into the skyline. "I don't know how you're putting up with all of this," they said to the blonde.
"I'm pretty used to people judging me," Harper replied, setting her can down in the space between her and Reggie.
"Am I a bad person for staying with Ca$h?" Darren asked.
"Hell no," "No," Reggie blurted at the same time as Harper.
"Sasha's a bad person for saying that," Harper explained.
"But is there a part of you that blames him for it, though?" they asked. Reggie glimpsed at the McLean girl, wondering if she did as well. She thought for a moment before answering with a, "No.", to which Darren argued, "But... he could have told someone. He could have done something more."
"He's the reason it wasn't worse," Harper informed. "I said that in my statement, and I'll say it at the trial."
Darren scoffed softly at her words. "Trial," they repeated. "I have a boyfriend who's going on trial. It's crazy to think he might not get out for a while."
"You get to see him tomorrow, though, right?" Reggie inquired.
"Yeah... yeah, his nan's taking me," Darren told the two. "We talk every day on the phone. But..." they trailed off with a hum and a shrug of their shoulders. "Actually getting to touch his hand..." a deep breath escaped them before they exclaimed. "Oi, Reggie?" Reggie let out a hum after taking a sip from his drink. "Why did you and Ant break up? I thought things were going well."
"It's complicated," Reggie dismissed it with a wave of his hand before taking another gulp.
"More complicated than your boyfriend being in jail?" Darren shot.
Reggie spent the entire night trying to avoid a certain conversation that he knew was coming. He did everything he could to distract himself and others around him, but no matter what he did, the impending discussion kept creeping back into his mind. It seemed like an unavoidable topic that he couldn't escape from, and it left him feeling anxious and unsettled. Despite his best efforts to push it aside, the conversation continued to resurface, looming over him like a dark cloud. By the time the night was over, Reggie was emotionally drained and mentally exhausted from the constant effort of trying to evade the inevitable.
"It's dumb, okay?" Reggie scoffed lowly before he shook his head. He rubbed his palms against the denim of his jeans. "J-Just forget it."
"Oi, um, Spider says I'm a witch," Harper piped up. "Let's cast spells on people."
"I'll go first," Darren said, going along with the change in topic. They motioned their hands in the direction of Spider and Ant, who stood in one of the corners of the area they sat above. They cleared their throat after exhaling. "Abraca..." they stopped to laugh along with Harper and Reggie, "Shut up! Abracadabra, may you always have really bad dick cheese."
"Abracadabra... may all the bindies find their way into your feet," Harper said, pointing at Sasha and sticking her middle finger up. The three broke out into laughter. Harper nudged Reggie's shoulder with hers. "Your turn, Reg. Who are you gonna curse?"
His eyes scanned the people beneath them. "Eh, I think all the assholes got their curses already," he stated with a shrug of his shoulders. The others chuckled at his words before Amerie's voice broke out. "Hey, we should probably get out of here!"
"What have you done now?" Harper questioned.
"Yeah, good chat," Amerie responds before carrying on her way. The three all shared matching looks at Amerie's sudden leave.
Reggie's heart was pounding in his chest as he approached his mother's apartment. It was well past his curfew, and he knew that he was in trouble. He carefully turned the doorknob and gently pushed the door open, trying to make as little noise as possible. As he stepped inside, he closed the door behind him, wincing at the faint click of the latch. He didn't want to wake either his mother's boyfriend or his mother, who would undoubtedly be furious if she found out he was out so late. that he was out. He softly placed his keys on the table beside the door and crept toward his room.
As he finally made it to his bedroom, he collapsed onto his bed with a deep sigh. Despite his exhaustion, he couldn't shake off the memory of what had happened between him and Ant. It lingered in his mind, replaying over and over again like a broken record. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't escape the endless loop of thoughts that kept him awake, tossing and turning throughout the night.
The students crowded into the hall to prepare for the assembly about the new school captain, who only had one person running... one irritating and vexing person. Sasha sat beside the podium waiting for her to be crowned the school captain while Woodsy gave her speech.
"Being a school captain is a huge responsibility. It requires leadership, caring for other people. The very well-being of our students is in their hands," the principal declared. "This year, we've only had one, uh, candidate come forward. Well done, Sasha. So I would like to encourage you all to be brave and throw your hat in the ring and give it a go. Sasha, why don't you take us through your policies?"
"Thank you to our esteemed-" "Wait! I'm gonna run," a shout interrupted Sasha's anticipatingly lengthy speech, which Reggie was somewhat grateful for... until he noticed that it was Spider who had interrupted her. He stood on his chair.
"Okay. Well done, Spencer, if you'd like to-" "Do you feel forgotten... unseen, left behind, or worse, do you feel..." Spider proceeded, using a large pink dildo as a microphone. Reggie groaned and tossed his head back out of annoyance. He stepped in every open chair until he reached a few rows in front of the stage. "...like you can't even breathe for fear of getting canceled?" With swift movements, he made it to the stage and pointed the dildo in Sasha's face. She smacked the tip of it, causing the Wilson boy to try to suppress a chuckle. "People like Sasha So have made me feel like I'm responsible for all the world's problems for far too long now."
"It's disrespectful," Sasha spat at the taller boy.
"And I'm sick of it," Spider let out. "People can say what they want about me. But what you see is what you get. So I say, it's time for us, the canceled, to take back the power." The scattered sounds of cheers came from the crowd, "It's time to be unapologetic about who we really are."
"Boo!" Harper shouted. She somewhat hid the fact that it was her by having her hand over her mouth.
"So vote for me, Spencer White, if you want a real leader," the blonde boy declared and held up the object in his hand. The way it bounced made Reggie burst out in laughter. Some cheers and claps were heard from the crowd, one specifically coming from Ant.
"Okay," Woodsy let out with an annoyed tone. "Thank you so much, Spencer."
"If Spider gets school captain, we're all doomed," Harper said.
"I don't know if I feel any better about Sasha being elected to be honest," Darren expressed. Amerie shot up from her seat and announced, "I'm gonna run too."
"Am, what the hell?" Harper asked quietly. She grabbed her hand to get her attention. The Wadia girl climbed over her to get to the aisle between the chairs. Reggie leaned forward to watch the girl as she accomplished so.
"Maybe this is it, Harps," Amerie explained. "This is what I put my energy into. Making it up to everyone."
"Okay, well, this is unexpected," Woodsy let out. Amerie jogged up to the stage and took hold of the large dildo that Spider still held in his hand. "Uh... um... I doubt many of you would want to vote for me right now. And I get it," Amerie said. "I've let a lot of people down. Even in the last day, I think I've pissed off about 20 of you..." she cut herself off with a nervous chuckle, "But I think that's what makes me the best candidate because I wanna be better. I want to make it up to you all and I will work five times harder than anyone else to do it. I will prove that I can be a good person. Plus who'd want these two dickheads as school captain? They don't want this for you, they want it for themselves, for their own egos. So... vote one. Amerie Wadia. Hartley High's biggest fuck-up. Let me make it up to you."
The crowd was silent after the girl's speech. Reggie looked around seeing that the majority of them had blank stares while others glared at her with annoyance. Spider snatched the pink dildo out of her hand.
With a beaming smile on her face, Quinni stood up from her seat and enthusiastically cheered for her friend. Her joyfulness was contagious as Darren, Reggie, and Harper quickly followed suit, jumping up and joining in with loud clapping.
"Thank you, Amerie," Woodsy glanced at the students in the crowd. "Everybody, our three candidates for school captain of Hartley High." The rest of the students applauded as they cheered on the three teenagers standing up on stage.
"So, we'll be your campaign managers, but you're gonna have to choose a vice," Darren declared as the group of five friends walked out of the school.
"I was thinking Quinni," Amerie replied. Reggie's eyes looked at the ginger-haired girl, who glanced confusedly at the Wadia girl. "Seriously?" she questioned. To which Amerie explained her reason, "I reckon you'll be amazing."
Her phone dinged, causing her to pull it out and check what it was. "How's the look on those two rockjobs when you got up there?" Harper joked.
"What the hell?" Amerie let out, looking down at her screen. Her friends glanced at the screen out of curiosity. Reggie's brows furrowed as he saw the image on her phone. It was a black-and-white picture of her with red eyes and red words written around her.
"You don't get to be the hero," Quinni read the words. "Bird Psycho."
"Bird Psycho?" Darren repeated.
"Did this happen just now?" Reggie asked.
"Wait, so they're after you now?" Harper questioned.
Amerie had the look of shock on her face. But then it soon shifted into realization. "No. No, they were always after me," she proclaimed. "Harps, the ibis was on my bag, the one I lent you, it's got my name on it. Then the mynah bird, that was my house. Whoever this is, they wanna bring me down."
"So it really isn't Chook," Harper stated.
"No, we would've seen him in the hall. Whoever sent this was in the assembly just now," Quinni clarified. "Bird Psycho's out to get Amerie. And they go to this school!"
All of a sudden, a loud chorus of dings and beeps echoed through the courtyard, startling the students. As they checked their phones, a wave of murmurs and whispers spread through the crowd, drawing everyone's attention to Amerie, who stood in the center of it all looking puzzled and confused.
"Who at Hartley hates me this much?"