Learning to stand up on your own means embracing the power of self-reliance, but remember that each step taken without support also carries the weight of uncharted consequences. Tread wisely, for the lessons you learn along the way are the true measures of growth. For it is not the fight itself that defines us, but the strength we find within when faced with the choice to either succumb or persist.
"Babalik ako para dalawin ka ulit dito, Lola. Pangako 'yan."
I closed my eyes as I stepped onto the borders line. Parehong pakiramdam lang sa tuwing tatawid ako rito na may kuryenteng dumadaloy sa buong katawan ko. When I opened my eyes again, I was in the middle of forest here in Hydera Pennha. The cold breeze welcomed me and the chirping of the birds were everywhere. I sighed. I'm here again to continue the journey I've started.
Should I go back to the Academy? Or I'll go to somewhere else?
In the end, I end up going to the town hall and see Nimfa. Malaya na akong nagpapakita sa ibang bampira nang walang sinusuot na nagtatakip sa katawan ko. I don't need to drink Zandrei's blood just to cover up the strong scent of my blood.
"Napadalaw ka, Niane. You've.. really changed a lot," namamanghang sambit niya.
"I just want to try it again. Baka sakaling makausap ko na sila."
Konting pag-asa lang ang meron ako at gusto kong gamitin 'yon alang-alang sa mga katanungang gusto kong masagot. When my memories came back, all I know was just the information of them being killed. Malabong makita 'yon ng mga mata ko dahil pilit akong inilalayo ni Papa upang hindi ko 'yon masaksihan. I was just sticking to the fact that they were killed. 'Yon ang dahilan kung bakit nawalan ako ng pag-asang baka buhay pa sila.
The only hope that helps me look forward is to hear the answers coming from them. Sa kanila lang ako naniniwala ng totoo. They were my parents after all.
"I'm sorry pero ayaw talaga. May bampirang dumalaw sa'kin ilang araw na ang nakalipas ngunit gumana naman ang kapangyarihan ko. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ayaw gumana sa'yo," nawawalang pag-asa niyang sabi.
Ilang ulit na namin 'yong ginawa kaya napabuntong hininga na lang ako. "Maybe truth wasn't really on my side. Or maybe there's no wrong with you but its on me."
"No, its not that. Remember what I've told you? What if you can't call them because their spirits are wandering in this world? Baka hindi pa sila matahimik sa pagmakamatay nila." She reminded me the first time I visited here.
Kumunot naman ang noo ko. "How am I supposed to call them? Is there even a way?"
"The only way is to build connections with them. Hanapin mo ang puntod nila at doon mo sila kausapin. Tell them how much you wanted to talk to them. Nothing is stronger than a bond you have with your parents," she enlightened me.
"Says the one who had a great bond with her parents," I said sarcastically.
She just laughed at me. "We're not in the same boat, Niane. But maybe we kinda have similarities. If vampires knew my true existence they would also hate me too."
"What about your true existence? Is your father a mortal?" I couldn't help but to ask out of curiosity.
She smiled bitterly and shook her head. "He's one of the cenas in Vanerhart Academy. Brandon Lacosta."
Nakatulala lamang ako habang naglalakad palabas ng town hall. Ni hindi ko halos maisip na sa lahat ng pwede niyang maging ama ay si Sir Brandon pa. Everyone in the school looks up on him. He's the cena of Black Zythe, the fearsome four with Eurisse as the special member.
How come he did not know about his daughter's existence? Was it because Lezonra was punished and being throwed away to Ivoire? She's a witchcraft who loved... a vampire.
Ipinilig ko ang ulo ko para ipagpaliban munang isipin 'yon. Saka na lang siguro kapag nakabalik na ako sa Academy. I stared at the platinum-made-like gate in front of me. There were ancient carvings that I don't understand, probably symbolizes its history of building. I was standing in front of my Kingdom even though I'm hesitating to call it my own. Dito ko naisipang hanapin ang libingan ng mga magulang ko. Maybe its here, why not? This is the place my father lived in his entire life. Any my mother.. I wasn't even sure if she's here.
"Magandang araw, mahal na prinsesa. Anong maitutulong ko sa'yo?" A servant approached me as I entered the castle.
"A-Alam mo ba kung nasaan ang puntod ng Papa ko? Prince Aries Gyll Perth," I asked her.
Agad naman siyang tumango kaya kahit papaano ay nabuhayan ang loob ko. "Take me to his grave."
Dahil sa laki ng palasyo, maraming pasikot sikot ang ginawa namin hanggang sa makarating kami sa hallway palabas ng East Wing. Its still a part of the palace, however, its the outside part that consists with the gardenia where flowers bloomed beautifully. Mahahalata mo talagang inaalagaan ito ng maayos dito sa loob. There was a secret passageway in the bushes and we took the way inside. Doon pa lang sa kinatatayuan namin ay nakita ko ang isang bato na may nakabalibot na bulaklak. It must be Papa's grave. Ngunit nasaan ang kay Mama?
"Where's the grave of my mother? Bakit isa lang ang nandito?" I asked with confusion.
Agad naman siyang yumuko sa'kin. "Paumanhin po ngunit hindi po siya inilibing dito. Mahigpit na ipinagbawal 'yon ng hari dahil hindi raw siya itinuturing na kasama sa pamilya."
"Then where did they buried her? Do you have any idea?" I asked again, trying to calm myself.
"Ang sabi nila ay doon sa bilangguan sa ilalim ng palasyo nilagay ang abo ng katawan niya." She was struggling to tell me every detail of it. "S-Sa.. kwarto kung saan siya madalas ikulong ng hari. Gusto niya pa sanang ipatapon na lang ito ngunit pinigilan siya ni Prinsipe Arthemis."
"You can go now. Thank you for telling me. 'Wag mo na lang sabihin sa iba na nagtanong ako."
"Masusunod po," yumuko siya bago umalis.
I let out a deep sigh and slowly walked towards my fathers grave. Nalaman ko agad na sa kanya ito dahil nakaukit naman ang pangalan niya rito. I put my hands on his tomb, caressing it just like what he usually do when I was a kid. Napapakalma niya ako sa ganitong paraan.
"Hi Papa. How are you?" I gave him a small smile. "Pasensya na kung natagalan ako, ha? Iba't ibang sitwasyon kase ang kinakaharap ko bawat araw. It was all hard for me to cope up and accept the life given to me. Gusto ko lang humingi sagot sa'yo, kakayanin ko ba lahat? Do I have to continue this?" I wiped the tears that fell from my eyes.
Maraming mga bulaklak na nakapaligid sa puntod niya kaya alam kong palagi siyang naaalagaan. Everyone in this Kingdom loves him, even after what he did.
"Papa, hindi ko sinisisi sa'yo na naging ganito ako ah. Its just that I couldn't be happy. Hindi ko na alam kung pa'no eh. Nauubusan na ako ng lakas at pag-asa na magiging okay din ang lahat. If there's only a surrender button in my life, I would gladly press it to be with you and Mama in the afterlife." Isang malakas na hangin ang dumampi sa balat ko kaya napapikit ako at hinayaang liparin nito ang mga buhok ko.
I could feel its warmth. The warmth of the person who used to love me without thinking of others perspective. Ang nag-iisang bayani ng buhay ko na pinaglaban kami ni Mama hanggang dulo.
"Papa.. Kung ayaw mo 'kong sumuko, can you please lend me your strength? Ubos na ang lakas ko sa lahat ng sakit na dinanas ko. Give me a sign to continue living my life until I could get the justice I've been aiming for," I said softly and opened my eyes.
Tumama sa mukha ko ang sikat ng araw at ang kulay kahel na kalangitan. I smiled brightly when he heard me right. Orange is his favorite color and he's giving me sign through changing color of the sky.
Agad kong ibinalik ang tingin sa puntod niya. "Thank you for not leaving my side ever since, Papa. I'll promise to come back. I love you.."
Nang makapasok ako sa palasyo ay napaisip ako kung saan nga ba ako dadaan patungo sa dating bilangguan. I couldn't ask the guards because they might report it to the King. They were all faithful to him. Ano nga ba naman ang mali kung magtanong ako tungkol kay Mama. Don't tell me they will hid her from me until now?!
"Can you take me where the prison is? The place where my mother's ashes were being hidden," I asked one of them.
Dalawa sila na nagkatinginan bago tumango. Isa lang sa kanila ang sumama sa'kin para ihatid ako habang ang isa ay nagpaiwan para magbantay sa daraanan. The security is very strict and they were keeping an eye everywhere. Kahit nga siguro ako ay babantayan nila dahil wala ilang tiwala sa maaari kong gawin. Is their King afraid that just like my father, I will also betray him? But if I do, I guess it would be more than what he did. Wala namang masamang ginawa ang Papa ko, baka ako meron.
"Hihintayin ba kita rito sa labas, prinsesa?"
Umiling naman ako. "Just go back. I can handle myself."
I can still remember this dark place where he took my mother and imprisoned her. Wala pa ring pinagbago ang hallway dito, kasing dilim pa rin ng ugali niya. Hindi ko alam kung hanggang kailan ko dadalhin ang galit ko sa kanya.
How can this place be called a prison without a prisoner? Wala namang kahit na sino sa loob ng mga rehas na nandito. Before, I could hear small voices from any creatures but not anymore. Pinalaya na kaya sila? O pinatay din kagaya ng ginawa nila kay Mama?
I stared at the black prison in front of me. T-This is the place.. and I remembered it clearly. Nilakasan ko ang loob na buksan 'yon ngunit ayaw dahil nakalock. How am I going to open this? Wala namang inabot na susi sa'kin ang kawal kanina.
I tried to hold the padlock and pulled it as strong as I can but its no use. Nang maalala kong nagiging malakas ako kapag naging bampira ay binago ko ang anyo ko at saka ulit sinubukan itong hilahin. Are they going to punish me for breaking in this prison? My reasons are even valid! Si Mama naman ang pinunta ko rito.
"Hi Mama.. Are you okay here? I guess not. You don't like dark places." Tears immediately filled my eyes when I saw the jar of ashes below the bed.
I can recognized that it was hers. Bukod sa rito siya nakakulong noon ay gumaan bigla ang pakiramdam ko nang mahawakan ko siya. Umupo ako sa kama at niyakap ang pinaglagyan ng abo niya. When I looked around, all I could see is darkness. Ayaw ni Mama sa madidilim na lugar kaya ang gardenia ang pinakapaborito namin dito sa palasyo.
"I missed you so much. Mama, pasensya na kung ako ang dahilan kung bakit humantong ka sa ganito. I am always grateful for your sacrifice just to let me live. Nasaksihan ko rin kung gaano kasakim sa atin ang mundo. We couldn't always get what we want. Kung nandito ka lang sana.. kahit gaano pa nila ako saktan okay lang basta kasama kita. Naiinggit kase ako sa iba na may matatawag silang Mama at may mapagsasabihan ng problema nila habang ako wala." Mapait akong napangiti at hinaplos ang pinaglagyan niyang nangangalikabok na sa tagal.
Namimiss ko na ang yakap ng isang ina. I wanted to feel being taken care of a mother. Gusto kong maranasan na pangaralan ako sa mga bagay na ginagawa ko at ginagabayan ako sa tamang direksyon. How I wish I could be with her. Masyado nang matagal simula nang mawala siya at hindi ko man lang narinig ang katagang 'mahal kita' sa kahuli hulihang pagkakataon.
"I'm sorry if I failed to protect Lola. Siya na nga lang ang naiwan sa'kin hindi ko pa nagawang maalagaan." Napahikbi ako nang maalala silang dalawa. "I hope you have seen each other now. Mama, magparamdam kayo sa'kin ha. Pakiramdam ko kase nag-iisa na lang talaga ako. I'm starting to lose hope in everything everything." Naramdaman kong parang may dumampi sa pisngi ko kaya idinilat ko ang mga mata ko.
I couldn't see her but I do feel that its my mother. Mabilis makakilala ang isang anak sa sarili nitong ina. Mas lalo lang ako umiyak ngunit napangiti nang mapagtantong hindi niya ako kailanman kinalimutan. I was glad that they could still recognize me.. even how much I've changed throughout the years.
"Kapag maayos na ang lahat, bibigyan kita ng magandang libingan. Pangako, Mama, babalikan kita."
I get out of the palace just like a wind that no one noticed. Its almost 3:00 o'clock in the afternoon and I haven't eaten lunch. Sa sobrang bilis ng araw dito sa Hydera Penha, wala kang masyadong magagawa buong magdamag.
Sa Academy na lang siguro ako kakain dahil babalik naman na ako ro'n. The reason why I didn't eat in the palace is because I will surely lost my appetite eating there. Hindi naman na ako babalik do'n kapag hindi kailangan.
"The match has started. Let's go now. This is going to be fun," sambit ng isang babaeng Hemione sa dalawang kasama niya at nilagpasan ako.
They might not have recognized me. Kung sabagay, wala pa namang nakakakita sa itsura ko simula nang umalis ako.
"Ang tagal kong nagising, tara na! Nagsisimula na sila!" sigaw pa ng isang babaeng paparating na sa pagkakakilala ko ay isang Delta.
What is happening here? May event ba sila?
Out of curiosity, I followed them on their way to the East Wing. No'ng lumiko kami ay doon ko nakita ang lahat ng bampirang nagkukumpulan sa likod ng apat na building ng mga class. Just in front of the Mall, Training Room, Dining Hall, and the Headmistress Office. They were forming a big square and what's in the middle is—I don't have any idea. Sa dami nila wala kong halos na makita sa likod.
"Anong nangyayari sa gitna? May away ba?" hindi ko na mapigilang magtanong sa nakatabi ko.
She didn't even bother to look at me and was busy tip toe-ing just to see. "Yes, there's an annual match. I happens every year in this Academy. Bakit hindi mo alam?"
"Uh.. I'm just a new student here," I excused.
"The four masters of Black Zythe—five rather including Eurisse will be the judge of this match. Artilles members will be fighting one versus one and whoever wins has the chance to fight with one member coming from the Delta. Then, if he/she can still win, then it will probably be moved to a fight with a Hemione. Whoever wants to participate can get benefits. Higher grades!" She looked so delighted telling those instructions to me.
Napatingin naman ako sa gitna nang medyo lumuwag na ang area. "How about if that Artilles can take down the Hemione? Does that mean they can proceed to a match with one of the Black Zythe?"
"Its impossible!" Doon na niya ako tiningnan at bahagyang nagulat nang makita ako. "N-No one has overcome to that level. Kapag sa tingin ni Mavis magaling ang nakatalo sa Delta, siya mismo ang lalaban to represent the Hemione. Sisiguraduhin niyang walang makakalampas para makalaban ang Black Zythe," natatakot niya pang dagdag.
Higher grades, huh? Pumalpak o hindi malaki na rin siguro ang ibibigay kapag nakalampas ka kahit sa Delta man lang. Is killing even allowed?
"Hindi ba pwedeng pumatay?" tanong ko ulit.
"No, its prohibited. May limit naman na kapag nagring na ang bell dahil talagang napuruhan ang kalaban, saka ihihinto ang labanan."
Everyone spread the square they formed so that vampires fighting in the middle can freely use their skills. Noong una nagtaka ako kung bakit hindi lumalagpas ang tira nila at ligtas kaming nandito sa labas ng square. Then I realized that it was because of the gravity of the air, controlled by our cena Madam Crysta. It was made on purpose so that no one outside the line could get hurt.
Pinanood ko nang maigi ang naging labanan nila. Malakas ang loob ng mga nakatataas na class sa'ming mga Artilles dahil ang tingin nila ay mahihina kaming lahat. Where in fact, I saw their hardwork in training even without the consent of our cena. They train to make themselves stronger and to ease the discrimination in our class.
I felt relieved when Elora managed to overcame the match with the vampire from the Delta. I was expecting that Mavis would step in to match with her but I was wrong. It was the other girl from Hemione, the one who used to hurt me the first time I came here. Ni hindi ko nga alam kung anong pangalan niya.
"Inuulit ko, malaya kayong makakamit ng kahit anong kakayahan sa laban. Ang pagtunog ng bell ay hudyat na mayroon nang nagwagi," Madam Ovrey instructed them again.
Nang magsimula na ang laban nila ay nakatuon lang ng maigi ang atensyon ko sa mga galaw nila. Based on Elora's skills, I know that she's one of the best students in our class in terms of combat training. Seconded by Hendrix who's always in the top for his fast moves. Ngunit alam naman ng lahat na hindi gano'n kabilis na talunin sa combat ang mga Hemione lalo na kung wala kang ability.
The bell rang, the sign that the fight's over. "The winner goes to Camilla from class Hemione."
Napatingin ako kay Elora na mukhang ilang minuto lang ay babagsak na sa pagod. They really proved that they're monsters in terms of fightings. Ngayong nanalo ang Hemione, paniguradong kung sino man ang makakalagpas sa Delta ay siya ulit ang makakasangga.
"Any representative from Artilles?"
"Ako. I'll try." Everyone turned their attention to me, either wondering who's the girl who volunteered or thinking I might not make it like the others.
Kung titingnan ang reaksyon nila parang hindi nila ako makilala. But Madam Crysta did recognized me and called my name. Wala akong ibang marinig sa paligid kundi ang pagsinghap lang nila na parang hindi makapaniwalang ako ang nakikita nila ngayon. I never wanted to be the center of attraction but remembering those days before, its nothing new.
Hindi rin nakaiwas sa mga mata ko ang malalakas na titig ng mga nasa harapan. Black Zythe. Leaders of Artilles, Delta, and Hemione. Nando'n silang lahat at nakatingin sa'kin.
"Niane Maliseth Perth will be matched with Hendrix Oddly," she announced.
Mas lalo pang lumakas ang bulungan nang marinig nila ang apelyido ko. Shit. I wasn't informed that they changed my surname. Hindi ko na magagamit ang middle name ko rito ngayon.
'She's a Perth? Impossible! Si Master Seven lang naman ang nag-iisang Perth dito'
'She's really a social climber. No'ng una nakapasok siya kahit tao pa ngayon dala niya na ang apelyido sa isa sa powerful web'
'How did that happened? Don't tell me they're siblings!'
Hindi ko na lang pinansin ang mga naririnig ko since I need to focus. Hindi ko dapat i-distract ang sarili ko sa mga bagay. Sabihin na lang nating training ko 'to na may kasamang grades din. Kung noon okay lang sa'kin ang pumalpak, ngayon hindi na. I'm bringing one of the powerful surnames with me that's why I should not fail. Pagod na akong bumagsak.
"I didn't know that you'll change like that. Kung hindi sinabi ang pangalan mo hindi kita makikilala," he said with amusement in his eyes.
Tinawanan ko lang siya. "Come on. Just think of me as your opponent. Don't hesitate to kill me if you want."
Malakas ang loob ko hindi dahil bampira na ako kundi maipapakita ko rin kung paano ako nagtraining kasama si Winslet noon. She taught me a lot of things and its like a mark inside my head that cannot be erased. I had a challenging moment with her. Having the vampire's basic skills is just one of the advantages.
"Just fight with all you can, Hendrix. You're best in having fast movements," I motivated him when he fell countless times.
We're both using our vampire ability. Basic skills. Ayokong saktan siya gamit ang ability kong hindi ko naman alam pa na gamitin. As much as possible, I won't be using it in this match. He's still my friend and hurting him isn't one of my plan. Special training at grades lang ang habol ko rito.
"Niane Maliseth Pert wins! Kindly proceed to the match with a Delta," Madam Crysta continued to guide us.
Hindi naman ako nanghina sa laban namin ni Hendrix kahit na malakas siya. Nasa dugo na siguro namin ang pagiging matibay. Geez. Pumunta ako rito para kumain but here I am, fighting in this match.
"Hindi ako natatakot sa'yo kahit dala mo pa ang apelyido ni Master Seven." She looked at me with determination in her eyes.
I just nodded and didn't bother to answer. Mas magaling din siya kaysa ni Hendrix. As expected from Heaven's class.
We fought hand in hand combat and any other techniques in fighting. Vampires were cheering for their class because if they win, each members can also get points. I wasn't expecting for Elora and Hendrix to do the same thing to me. Well, its not that I don't want it.
"I'm sorry. I just want higher grades," I ended our fight using a great force stopping her from making any move.
"Any volunteer from the Hemione?" Madam Ovrey asked her class.
I was expecting Mavis to step in because she told me to fight with her the last time. Instead, that Camilla whom I never did liked because of her boastful attitude, stepped in. Siya naman ang nanalo kanina kaya expected na rin na siya ang sasalang sa kung sino man ang makakahamon ulit sa Hemione. It was interesting to fight with a Delta but I am looking forward to a Hemione's ability.
"Look at you. Standing in the middle of the crowd to represent her low class." It wasn't surprising for her to look down on us.
Nakibit balikat naman ako. "Are you going to fight or just keep on bluffing?"
Her first attack missed. Sa totoo lang muntik na din akong matamaan sa tulis ng kuko niya ngunit nakaiwas ako. That was near. As I observed her moves, her skills were high class. Oo nga't wala siyang ability pero hindi ito dahilan para matalo siya. Even a combination of an Artilles and a Delta couldn't take her down. Ganito pala ang kakayahan ng mga first class.
She managed to hit my knees with a dagger and I gave her back a strong kick on the chest. Napalingon ako sa mga cena, naguguluhan. Using any kinds of weapons isn't prohibited. Napipikon na yata siya sa sampung minuto na laban namin dahil napagamit na siya no'n. Yeah, right. Mas nagtagal ang laban namin ngayon kumpara sa kanila ni Elora.
"Is that all you've got? I see. You're nothing special ever since you entered here. You don't deserve the title of Perth," she discouraged me.
I gave her an insulting look. "At least I have the title. Ano man ang sabihin mo, it wouldn't change the fact that I'm a Perth."
"The Perth are second to the most powerful web in Hydera Penha. Kinakatakutan sila. You don't look like one," pagak siyang natawa.
"Really? Hindi ba?" I raised an eyebrow at her. "Alam ko din 'yon."
Binigyan niya ako ng mapanghamong tingin na parang kampante siyang wala akong kayang gawin. I smirked and whispered something in the air. Sinusunod nito kung anong gusto kong mangyari sa katawan ng kahit na sino sa isang tingin lang. Just like what I've thought, she lost her body's strength.
'What's happening to her?'
'Look at her eyes, she's hurting Camilla'
'I-Is that her ability?'
Hindi niya ako makapaniwalang tiningnan, kagaya lang ng iba. "I wasn't supposed to do this because its out of the line. Ayokong minamaliit ako ng walang ihihigit sa'kin."
"Ms. Perth! It's over!" Madam Ovrey raised her voice.
Agad naman ako bumalik sa dati at saka ko lang napagtanto na nahihirapan na siyang huminga. Did I just overdo it?
"Niane!" I saw Mavis walking towards me.
What now?! Makikigpag-away na naman ba siya sa'kin?
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