A/N: Echo, Cameron, and Philip's official design without bandanas and headwears
A/N: (4-24-2024) Improved Design with headwear and bandanas
Empire: Greater Clan Reich (Olley Era)
Year: 2016
[Intro]
O, mein Freund! Jetzt hier ist ein Sieg
Dies ist der erste Gloria
O, mein Freund! Feiern wir diesen Sieg
Für den nächsten Kampf!
Flashes of every Clantarians appear all away from early Clantarian Legionary to late Clantrooper.
[Post-Chorus]
(Die Flügel der Freiheit...) Oh...
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Oh... Ha!
Every Clantarian and Era flashes and appear and doing fighting shit, including their personal struggles.
[Verse 1]
"Muimi na shi de atta" to...
Iwasenai saigo no hitori ni naru made...
[Pre-Chorus]
Der Feind ist grausam, wir bringen!
Der Feind ist riesig, wir springen!
[Chorus]
Ryoute ni wa gloria, utau no wa sieg
Senaka ni wa Flügel der Freiheit (Diese elenden Biester...)
Nigirishimeta ketsui wo hidari mune ni
Kirisaku no wa Ringe der Torheit (...Werden vernichtet!)
[Post-Chorus]
Soukyuu wo mau Flügel der Freiheit! Ha! Ha! Oh...
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Oh...
It ends with the Title, "(Mostly) Clantaria Interfering With Everything" flashing in.
With the 3D Gang hanging out, Cameron struggles to lift up a box. Why they wear 3D glasses? A "Thing" happened in 2012 Author would eventually get to and explain why. And don't ask where their bandanas and headwear's at.
Cameron: This box is so heavy!
Echo: My boi can't lift
Cameron: Hey, shush! Be quiet!
He still struggles to try and lift it from the ground. That just made Echo, Philip, and Olley laugh.
Cameron: You know what, how about you do it!
Echo: Fine
The British Clantarian Duck steps forward to where the Clantarian Humanoid Canadian failed. He then struggles to lift it like Cameron.
Cameron: You see. Not that easy
Olley: Look at that. "My boi can't lift"
Echo: (Struggling) Shut...your...ass!
He managed to pick up the box, but falls over and out comes a laserdisc of Timecop.
Cameron: (Gasps) Dude,it'sTimecopDirector'sCutonLaserDisc!
Philip: Whoa, whoa! Hold on! If I didn't know better, I think I just heard you just say "That's Timecop on LaserDisc"
Cameron then shows the 3D Gang the LaserDisc and they gasp.
Echo: That shit's rare!
Cameron: We've got something to watch 😃
Olley: Yeah- wait, no. LaserDisc suck ass
Cameron: Hey! Respect (Chuckles)
He then clears his throat.
Cameron: Don't worry, dudes. I know a place
They are now at Best Buy.
Cameron: Alright, let me do the talking
He then approach a Human-Convert Employee.
Cameron: Yo, Timmy!
Timmy: Cameron! How's it been?
Cameron: Oh, you know. Just taking it easy. Listen, we're looking for a Laserdisc player.
Timmy: Oh! You mean "Lamer-Disc Player". (Snickers) You're out of luck, dude. Nobody carries those things anymore
Cameron: Come on, man! You gotta have something!
Timmy: Sorry. Those things are ancient. Why don't you go check in a library?
Employee: (Slides down the nearby ladder) Heyo! (High fives Timmy) Because the library's where all junkie stuff goes, "Speech Impediment Canadian"!
Cameron: It's not funker- Funker?
Timmy and Employee: Heyo!
They continue to high five each other and laugh.
Cameron: Shush! It's not funny!
Olley: Come on. Let's just go
He said while dragging Cameron away by the collar.
Cameron: They keep laughing, but it's not funny!
Later, they are using the library computer at the library.
Echo: Ok, looking for "LaserDisc Player"
He said while typing down on the search bar.
Philip: (Blind Wave Eric) "This is the loudest conversation we've ever had"
They waited for it to load.
Cameron: Gosh, it's been 2 seconds! What's taking so long!
Echo: Load faster, shitty computer
Just then, two guys that overheard their conversation approached them.
SP: Hello, friends. We overheard you looking for a Laserdisc player! How about a VCR instead?
LP: VHS: "The VH-Best"
Olley: No. VHS suck ass
Echo: We're just getting a LaserDisc Player, that's all
SP: Hah! Good luck finding one of those. There's plenty of VHS tapes out there
LP: VHS: "Quantity!"
Philip: What is this, the 90s!? We use Blu-ray now!
SP: Well, true, but did you know that brain can only process so much information?
LP: VHS: "Can't tell the difference"
Cameron: He's a salesman! Get outta here!
Philip: Will you fuck off!!!
SP: You're making a huge mistake
The two walked away. Finally, for convenient timing, they got what they're looking for.
Echo: Huh, only one
Cameron: Let's go!!! ✊
They got the information down on a piece of paper before heading to the service desk.
Echo: Oi, old man
Cameron: One LaserDisc Player, please!
He said slapping down the paper on the desk. The Librarian looks at it.
Librarian: "LaserDisc Player"? No, no. We don't have one here
He crumples up the paper and throws it away.
Cameron: What?! He rejected me!
Olley: There's one in basement, is it not
Librarian: The computer's out of date, kid
Cameron and Echo: Dude be lying
Olley: Liar Liar; That film Jim Carrey played in
Echo: It's "Pants on fire", Olley
Olley: Ey, two in one
Librarian: So I'm a liar, am I!? I'll show ya!!!
He then leads the 3D Gang down an elevator to the basement.
3D Gang: Woah...
They see so many formats from different times.
Philip: So many formats
Librarian: Of course. This is a library. But as you can see, no LaserDisc Player
He said showing an empty space for the LaserDisc Player.
3D Gang: Aw...
Librarian: Not that it will do you any good, even if you could find one. All the LaserDiscs were destroyed. Wiped out by VHS
Echo: Then how'd you explain-
He said while almost slicing Philip's face with the LaserDisc.
Philip: CAREFUL WHERE YOU'RE HOLDING THAT
The Librarian looked and was blinded by the golden light of the LaserDisc.
Olley: Why'd you take the disc out?
Echo: I wanted to show him
The Librarian was shock to see the LaserDisc.
Olley: No! Why show him the big-ass disc when the cover is good enough!?
Echo: Fine, I'll put it back in
He then puts the disc back in the cover.
Librarian: "Timecop". The last LaserDisc...
He then kneels down.
Librarian: The prophecy!
Echo: What?
Librarian: Years ago, it was foretold four chosen ones would reunite the last LaserDisc, with the last LaserDisc Player, and end the Format Wars once and for all!
Cameron: I just wanna see a film! I think he's crazy, guys
Librarian: In time...
He walks over to a sign.
Librarian: For you are...
He removes the sign and points to an inscription that resembles Olley, Echo, Cameron, and Philip.
Librarian: The Discmasters!
Philip:
Librarian: (Says a bunch of sped up "Yes"s) This new format was perfect. Too perfect. VHS needed to stop LaserDisc's superior imaging and sound fidelity before it could spread throughout society. Savvy consumers heard of it through whispers and rumors. But VHS wasted no time in snuffing it out
Olley: It's just DVD ahead of its time
Librarian: Oh, we tried to preserve the LaserDiscs for future generations. But failed... When their attack was done, only one LaserDisc Player remained. I am the last of my order , sworn to protect the final LaserDisc Player. And you, you're the chosen ones who will set me free
Philip: When did this all happened?
Librarian: 2 years ago
Some couldn't help but hold their laughter.
Librarian: May I?
He said, wanting to hold the big-ass DVD disc.
Echo: Fine 😒
He gave him the disc and was astonished on getting to hold a LaserDisc after all these years.
Librarian: Good heavens...
He then walks over to the secret LaserDisc Door and places the LaserDisc in. It spins as the place shakes...before it says to flip the LaserDisc over.
A/N:
The Librarian flips the LaserDisc and the place shakes again before opening a door. They then enter, but little did they know, someone was watching them.
SP: (Radio) SP to LP! SP to LP! Time to fast forward
Our Main Protagonists entered the room that has 4 giant statues.
Philip: (Markiplier) What is this!?
Librarian: They're the Guardians of Obsolete Formats. Betamax, 8-Track, Floppy Disk, Reel-to-Reel. You see, one does just not take the last laserDisc Player, you must awaken the Guardians first
He pushes a tray with four items on it in front of the group and they are lifted up.
Cameron: Wait, where I put this?
He said before two two pegs comes out of Reel-to-Reel's chest.
Cameron: (Tries to hold laughter while slowly looking away)
Echo: Damn, Cameron. Mind if I switch with you?
Echo activates Betamax, Philip activates 8-Track, Olley activates Floppy Disk, and Cameron activates Reel-to-Reel. The Guardians then reveal the last LaserDisc Player.
Philip: Holy damn...
Olley: Whoa...
Echo: It's amazing!
Cameron: We did it!
Librarian: Discmasters, behold! The last LaserDisc Player!
A/N: Blind Wave Rick: Drink
Cameron grabs the LaserDisc Player and the Guardians of Obsolete Formats began moving.
Betamax: My liege...
8-Track: My liege...
Floppy Disk: My liege...
Reel-to-Reel: My liege...
3D Gang: Woah...
Librarian: They are your protectors. The LaserDisc Format has many enemies who will stop at nothing to destroy those who wield its power. Knowing the dangers, would you still take the Player?
Echo: Hell yeah
Cameron then shoves the LaserDisc Player in his back pocket.
Cameron: Let me shove this in my... back pocket. Wait, what?
Philip: Put it in a case, you idiot
He said taking the LaserDisc Player and puts it in bubble wrap and in a briefcase with the LaserDisc.
Olley: I wanna see the baddie merge death thing
Cameron: Wait, what?!
Philip: You serious?
Olley: That's the only thing I remember of the film
Philip: You Clanboys are so ridiculous
Just as they were about to leave, Betamax stops infront of them.
Betamax: One more thing
3D Gang: (Groans)
Olley: The fuck you want
Betamax: Library Card, please
We cut to an annoyed Philip filling out an application.
Echo: Can't believe you don't have a Library Card
Cameron: You don't have one too!
Philip finished filling it out.
Librarian: Ok! All set!
And they're on the way.
SP: Hold it right there
Olley: Huh?
SP: We told you you were making a mistake
Philip: Didn't we tell you to fuck off
SP: We can't "Fuck off". For you see...
He then shows his VHS tattoo
SP: We are the Ancient Order of the VHS. Thank you for revealing the location of the LaserDisc Player (Laughs) Now hand it over or die!
LP: VHS: "Your VH-Death"
Librarian: Hah! Laserdisc will rise again! For they are the chosen ones and they would gladly die for Laserdisc! Isn't that right, Discmasters?
He looks over to see the 3D Gang hiding behind the Guardians of (the Galaxy) Obsolete Formats.
Olley: (JStu Andrew) Dying? You didn't say anything about dying
SP: Very well
They then pull out their guns.
SP: FIRE
The Ancient (First to Final) Order then fire at the group and the Guardians protected them from the bullet fire.
SP: Charge!
The Guardians begin to power up
Reel-to-Reel: Boomer-Reel!
Betamax: RGB-Beam!
Floppy Disk: Random Access Mayhem!
As the Guardians were fighting the Ancient Order, Olley and Cameron were together, firing back with their Kar98k (Olley) and M1 Garand (Cameron) while Philip and Echo are also firing back with their MP 40 (Philip) and M1A1 Thompson (Echo).
Ancient Order Member: (Radio) Send in the Tape Rewinders!
The Tape Rewinders busted through the walls and fires missiles all over the library.
Librarian: Run!
Cameron: Time for some (SpyCakes Noises) Slap Chop on them! I mean, um. Karate Chop them!
Echo: Slap chops!
Olley: Slap Chop?
Philip: (Camodo Gaming) Isn't that a product you can buy that cuts, like, onions?
Cameron: (SpyCakes) No. Totally not
Cameron went to kick a guy in the face, but the heel of his white Beatle Boot jabbed him in the eye and rips it out when Cameron pulls his foot out.
A/N: Blind Wave Calvin: Ah, the heel!
Cameron: HIS EYE
The Guardians were dominating the Ancient Order and were destroying them, even reviving them before killing them for a comedic bit.
Librarian: Yes! We're doing it!
8-Track: The day we've worked for is upon us!
Librarian: Indeed!
Suddenly, he hears something rapidly approaching them.
Librarian: (Gasps) Oh no...
Landing in was...
Just kidding. To be honest, you know the result. Homelanding in was a robot that says "12:00".
8-Track: The VC-Arbitrator!
8-Track was now at full power.
8-Track: I'll handle this
Librarian: 8-Track! NO!!!
8-Track: 8-Track Attack!
He fires all 8 rounds of tapes, which does nothing. VC-Arbitrator then fires a red beam at 8-Track and vaporizes him.
8-Track: (Microwave Society Jude with Vaporizing Effect) Oh my god, I'm disappearing now...!
Librarian: 8-TRACK!!! He was two weeks from retirement...
He then got shot in the chest.
Our bois kept fighting with WW2 Gunfire.
Echo: Grenade! (Throws Stielhandgranate)
Cameron: "Wow, I got some grenades" (Throws Stielhandgranate)
Librarian: (Weakly) Discmasters...
The 3D Gang were in the moment for a bit, only to eventually realize the Librarian is dying.
Olley: You good
Librarian: (Weakly) I'm done for... (Coughs)
Philip: Let me fix you up
He said holding out his Medi Gun.
Librarian: I didn't think it would come to this, but...we're running out of options. It's time I shed this weak, human form. Place the LaserDisc on my chest
Philip: I could heal you, you know
Librarian: No, you must put the LaserDisc on my chest!
Echo: But why? You're an idiot for forgetting we've reinvented modern medicine
Librarian: Just put the disc on my chest!!! 😠
Olley: Alright. Jeez
He then placed the LaserDisc on the Librarian's chest.
Librarian: Now, touch hands and chant "Sic Semper Fidelity"
Olley: Sick September what?
Echo: Isn't that a Latin Phrase with tyrants? Or was it against tyrants?
Cameron: It's "Sic Semper Fidelity", right?
Librarian: Yes!!!
Cameron: What?! How do I know that?!
Librarian: JUST DO IT!!! 😡
A/N: James May: You've chose the wrong guys
The 3D Gang then did so.
3D Gang: Sic Semper Fidelity! Sic Semper Fidelity! Sic Semper Fi-
Suddenly, the Librarian began to glow and float in the air as the LaserDisc spins. He then crystalfy and transform.
A/N:
SP: The LaserDisc Guardian! It's...beautiful...
LaserDisc Guardian: (Says some shit)
Cameron:
Reel-to-Reel: Discmasters, cover your ears!
They then did so. The LaserDisc Guardian then does a Sonic Attack.
SP: (Has ears covered) No, no! Cover your ears!
LP: 44.1 kilohertz sample ray...!
His head then explodes. The Ancient Order tries shooting back, but it does nothing and the LaserDisc Guardian then unleashed a lightning attack that kills all the dudes in the eyes and spreads.
Timmy: (Walking in) Dude, Cameron. My boss heard me making fun of you, and he totally fired me. Is it cool if I hang out with you guys- (Gets lightning eyed)
VC-Arbitrator: Infrared Blast! Infrared Blast!
The LaserDisc Guardian kept dodging his attacks.
VC-Arbitrator: Infrared Blast!
LaserDisc Guardian: (Chuckling)
Cameron: He's laughing! He's taunting him!
The LaserDisc Guardian jumps to the ceiling. The VC-Arbitrator jumps to attack and the two leaps towards each other. The LaserDisc Guardian then fires a gold blast that blows up VC-Arbitrator's gold aura and destroys it.
Guardians of Obsolete Formats: Huzzah!!!
Betamax: Discmasters! The Format Wars are over!
LaserDisc Guardian: (Says some shit)
Floppy Disk: Agreed!
Reel-to-Reel: All hail the Discmasters!
The Guardians and the Laserdisc Guardian: Hail!
Olley: So...can we watch "Timecop" now?
After all of that, they are now all in Olley's Royal Condo at Probert Station.
Cameron: (Holds Laughter) Graphics
Echo: (Microwave Society Bren) MAD in 20 be like
Philip: (Microwave Society Jude) I'm glad this "Bag of Chips" is playing on our 65in flat screen
Olley: Oi, this is my place!
*Literally finished the Civil War Scene/First Scene*
Olley: This shit's taking too long
Cameron: You wanna see the bit? Wait 'til the next hour
Olley: Bro, I got classes and shit
Cameron: (Fast Forwards) "Oh, wow. It's speeding up! The movie's moving so quick!"
The Boys laughed or tried to hold their laughter.
Echo: Hey, it's the scene Olley wants to see
Olley: Definitely a strong shove/kick
Cameron: Totally could've moved right there
Philip: The dumbass has distance too
Echo: No, his legs are glued to the ground on that specific bit. Couldn't move, even though he could
And then the bit happens...
Olley: Ugh, this is worse than I remember
Cameron: (Blind Wave Calvin) You wanted this! You wanted to see it again!
They ended up just talking shit about time travel movies and shows.
Echo: "They just bump into each other and nothing happens"
Philip: If this happened in Mr. Peabody & Sherman, it would be way better
A/N: I actually like Mr. Peabody & Sherman
Olley: Imagine this in Endgame
Philip: Would be way better than just say their shitty Hero Team Name once
Echo: Yeah, Endgame sucks and Infinity War was 100 times better
Cameron then starts messing with the fast forward and rewind button on the death scene, like they're Microwave Society.
Olley: "They turn to soup!"
Echo: Where the shit go?
Philip: (Microwave Society Jude) Gone. Reduced to gone
The 3D Gang just talk shit and messed around with the LaserDisc.
LaserDisc Guardian: (Says some shit)
Philip: (Junichi Takiyama) I don't even know what the fuck you are saying!!!
Throughout the night, they talked about ramdon stuff more than the LaserDisc itself.
Cameron: Seeing Timecop on LaserDisc...Eh, it's kinda mid
Philip: It may have better quality than VHS, but this is the most letdown I've ever had
3D Gang: (Agrees with him)
LaserDisc Guardian:...(I've chose poorly...)
If we suppose that I am not who I say.
Can you say with certainty that you're even yourself?
Will you be able to pick up the mess you made
once your heart just falls apart like it's sand?
I hear someone calling out my name.
It rings in my ears, it's driving me insane.
Time has frozen all around my head.
I need you to wake me up.
I began to walk straight through the deepest dark abyss.
Swiftly like a gale I knew I must escape this.
I felt as if my rotting corpse had risen back to life.
And now's the time that we break out of our walls.
Unite these different worlds.
Before they take it for them.