Yun SeByeol's POV~
Disappointment. That's what I was feeling right now.
It has already been 3 hours after I recieved my work orders. According to them I need to start with carrying the more needed goods out of the storage room while the less needed one's need to be settled orderly down there. After that I'm needed to help Yeosang in infirmary with whatever he needs and than I need to distribute the new clothes to the pirates with Elora.
And honestly, I'm not ready. I'm not ready at all to face any of them, not even Athena. I am too embarrassed for my childish outburst and saying stuff without considering how much they'll mean to someone.
It was lunch right now and I didn't had any apetite to eat so I just stayed in my room. I've already cleaned the wound on my neck but didn't felt like using my magic so I've only bandaged it.
I've thought about every possibility of what I should do but they all lead to just one thing. Apologise. I need to apologize to Seonghwa. And that's need to be done today only because the more time I take, the more our non-existent trust will waver.
I'm still in a dilemma to choose between being stubborn and act like nothing ever happened because honestly even though I feel guilty, there is still a little part of me which says that it wasn't my fault, that I would never have known it was a delicate topic for them.
If I was the young me, when I was around 11 and 12 years old, than right now I would've chose to be stubborn but after going through horrible things because of my own ego and insensitivity, I've lost people who cared about me and I don't want the past to repeat itself. I don't want to go through that horrible experience again. So I think keeping my ego aside, I'll apologise. Atleast I'll try to.
I've been thinking about our conversation, if you could even call it that, for the last few hours and I've deduced a fact that something has happened in their past where Seonghwa was almost replaced and that's why that was a sensitive line for them which I've crossed without thinking.
I mean, I admit what I did was wrong but I won't have a dream to tell me what they're sensitive about right. That still doesn't reason my actions though and that's why I'm feeling horrible.
If only I could put all the blame on the curse than I would but I can't. 30% or even more, it's my fault too.
Now, the question is, How should I apologise to Seonghwa? For sure, I don't have the courage to face him infront of everyone. I first need to find him alone and than I'll apologise or I can just give him a sorry letter but I don't think that would be enough.
While thinking what to do next, I heard a knock on the door.
What? Who could it be? Lunch was still going on. I stood up and questioned near the door.
"Who is it? "
After a moment of whispering and murmuring on the other side, I heard.
"It's us Miss. Golden, Alex and Austin."
Opening the door, I saw the twins standing while holding three plates of food.
"Hey, what are you boys doing here with so much food?" I asked them.
Austin replied slowly while scratching the back of his head with one hand and holding the plate with the other
"We didn't found you in the dining area and thought of eating with you. Only if that's okay with you ofcourse." He finished in the end rushingly.
Awww, they're so sweet.
I nodded while letting out a chuckle and opened the door more to let them enter.
"You both can sit on my bed." I said while bringing a chair near the bed and sitting on it myself, "And is this one plate for me? "
Alex nodded with red cheeks. Cute.
"Thank you so much for the food." I said taking one plate from him and took a bite, "Hhmm, It's delicious." I hummed in pleasure. I didn't had any appetite before but I think I can eat this much.
They both smiled brightly at me and continued eating.
After finishing our meal with a few remarks in between, Alex started to talk, "Quatermaster was really shocked before. Something bad had happened in the past which is why the others and captain are so protective of him." He finished looking up at me slowly.
"Please don't take them wrong, they don't treat new people, especially women this badly but it's just that you touched a really fragile topic." Finished Austin with a sigh.
I nodded smiling a little at him and replied, "I know. I'll just have to apologize and gain their trust and we'll be just fine. And now when I think of it, can you boys help me? "
They both looked at each other for a moment and shaked their heads, "I'm sorry Miss. Golden but we can't tell you about what happened in the past. " Said Austin.
Oh no, they got it wrong. I smiled a little at their loyalness to their crew and said, "That's not what I meant. I know their past is their's to tell, what I want help with is to know when the quatermaster is free so that I can apologise to him."
They both hummed and stared at each other and after few seconds they both started giggling. And not any innocent type of giggle, this was an evil giggle. What are these boys thinking?
Austin looked at me with a little smirk and said, "We will help you but first we need something."
Before I could ask what they need, Alex continued while pointing at his even more red cheeks now, "A kiss."
I sighed internally, ofcourse teenagers. I shaked my head and said, "No."
At that they both looked at me as if I just killed their one and only favourite cook, Heechan.
I chuckled at their expressions and said, "Not now. But if your guys plan works than you both may get a kiss."
Alex and Austin both thought while putting their finger on their chins and replied at the same time,
"Okay!! A-brothers. Plan:Apologising to the devil. Starts right now. "
Highfiving each other and than bumping their heads together, they both looked at me with determination.
Oh my god, they are cuties. I could feel myself melting because of their comportnent and brotherhood.
I laughed loudly and highfived them too. I didn't bumped our heads together though, that would be painful.
"So, what's the plan? " I asked whispering and acting like we were making a plan to steal this ship.
___________________
It took us half an hour to make 3 plans.
One of them need to be done tonight. The twins told me that the handsome quatermaster won't eat dinner in the dining area with everyone else that means he would be alone in his quarter and that gives me a chance to send him a sorry letter with some well cooked food.
First, I declined the offer saying that I'll just apologise but the twins informed me that during that time he don't allow anyone, not even the captain to disturb him from whatever he's doing. He only opens the door when he knows that the food is there. That's why I thought of just writing a letter. The boys will pass it for me because I'll be up on the deck that time written on the orders.
Damn, Hongjoong is brutal. He didn't allowed me to have dinner instead he informed me to look around the ship and in the ocean for any dangerous and unwanted creature or any danger in general. Who is he to stop me from eating though. I'll just steal some fruits from the storage bay. No no, that's the wrong word, it is not stealing if it is food. Anyways.
The second plan would be executed the day after tomorrow during dinner, Seonghwa would be up on the deck that time, doing the weekly checking around the ship or whatever you call it. At that time I'll first feel his aura and than think between apologising or just starting a light conversation and making things a little less awkward.
The last plan would be executed on the following day during night when instead of Jongho the quatermaster would be helming the ship. At that time I'll apologise to him fully. And hopefully, after that we could be atleast on each other's good terms if not friends.
The boys were gone and the plan was sorted out now. I felt lighter than before and fully in control too. I just hope nothing will go wrong while executing the plan.
I was about to get up and go to the storage bay to do my task when a sharp pain hitted me out of nowhere in my stomach.
It was so sharp that I almost fall down on my knees while holding my stomach.
.
.
.
Oh hell nah!!! What date is it. Getting up still clutching my stomach, I looked over the calender and yes my periods were just across the corner.
Noooooooo!! Why now.?!? Can't these bloody things stop after coming to a new world. I mean it's not like I'm going to get pregnant here anyways so the world doesn't need to remind me that. Do I need to suffer here too!!!
Being a women is difficult.
Ughh!!
I groaned loudly when another cramp hitted me.
Now, when I think of it. It all makes sense about why I was so grumpy and rude for so simple reasons. And why I easily lost ny temper. Yes, it was because of the curse too but it was because of this fricking red monster too.
I need to ask Elora for a pad later.
And if my intuition is right than my periods will start either at night or in the morning.
Lord save me.