Word Count: 2212
~Sienna
I can feel the note crumpled in my back pocket as I rush around the room.
For the first time since I developed a fear of storms, being in one is less terrifying than what else is going on around me.
Snagging my duffle bag from the closet, I unzip it, looking around my room with things to fill it with. Everything my eyes brush over reminds me too much of Onyx. Every hand-made dress he's lovingly complimented. Every jacket he's laid over my shoulder. Even my hairbrush reminds me of him, when he sat and brushed my hair tenderly after Kayn hit me.
I'm leaving forever, and I don't want memories of him chasing me along the way.
The door to my bedroom opens just as a crack of thunder rolls across the sky, so close overhead that the glass rattles in the window frame.
Alex peeks her head in, her light blonde hair shoved up into a messy bun.
"Hey." Her brows draw together. "I wanted to come check on you."
With Onyx gone, we've been spending a lot of time together. It breaks my heart leaving here when she just got this job, but I can't stay and risk Onyx's life...
"Why?" I ask, folding one of my favourite shirts up before shoving it into the bag.
"The storm. Onyx isn't here...I thought you might need some company." The door clicks closed as she glides into the room.
"I'm okay. My mind is on other things," I mumble, brushing past her as I head to my dresser.
Alex scans the room, her pale eyes glowing as lightening spills vivid light into the room for a split second.
"Wait..." She opens my bag, looking at the contents stuffed haphazardly inside. "What are you packing for?"
"I'm leaving."
She whirls around. "Where are you going? It's late."
With my back to her, I squeeze my eyes shut, my throat burning from holding back tears. I'm so jumped up on adrenaline I haven't broken down just yet, but I can tell it's coming.
I'm leaving behind the only man I've ever loved. I'm doing this to save him, and yet every inch of my heart is breaking.
"I need to get as far away from here as possible." I collect some more clothing, continuing to avoid anything that Onyx has ever complimented.
"Why?" Alex's voice breaks. "Did something happen?"
I pause, turning to her. Her expression is crumpled with sadness, with fear. Guilt ripples through me, but it's short lived. Whoever is writing these notes is dangerous, and knows about my connection to Zion. If they are wanting to punish me, there is a good chance they will target Alex.
Resting my hands on her shoulders, I shake her a little. "Stay here and make the most of your job. You deserve it."
"Sienna. Tell me what's going on," she begs as I shift past her again.
"Things from my past are catching up to me. I need to leave." I swipe up an extra pair of shoes, stuffing them into my bag along with a bundle of socks.
"What things?"
"Nothing I can tell you about," I say through gritted teeth.
This note has to be from Zion, or someone close to him. He's tormenting me, wanting it to be me that breaks the news to Onyx. That way the most amount of pain will be caused.
"Where are you going to go?" Alex asks, trying to step into my line of vision.
"Far. As far as possible." I sweep my hands through my hair. "I need to put packs between Onyx and I."
If I stay in his pack, he'll find me with ease. Someone will recognise me and it will get back to him, but beyond this territory lines, I'm less well known. And pursuing me over them will be much more difficult.
Alex grabs my arm, her grip tight as she pins me with a sharp look. "Did he do something to you?"
"No," I lower my voice a touch, unease crawling over my skin. "If I stay he's in danger."
She blinks. "I'm assuming from something in your past, right?"
"Uh huh."
I don't want to tell her any more and get her involved in my problems. The last thing I need is for her to become a target too.
"Does he know about this?" She questions, watching me collect the last few items I need, stuffing them into the bulging bag. She's realising there is nothing that is going to stop me now.
"No. You can't tell him." I tug at the zip of the bag, gritting my teeth as it fights to stay open. "Say I've gone on holiday and I'll be back in a week. That should be enough time."
Alex wraps her arms around herself, rattled. "I can't lie to my Alpha."
With the bag finally zipped, I turn to face her, resting my hands on her shoulders. She's trembling beneath my hands.
"Please, Alex. As my friend..."
This won't cost her anything. When Onyx realises she's done what I've wished, he will understand. Of course he will be upset, but he's not narrow sighted enough to pin blame on her.
"Onyx is your best friend. He will want to help you." Alex winces as I sling the bag over my shoulders.
I sigh. Now might not be the best time, but I can't leave here without being honest first. She deserves to know about the nature of Onyx and I's relationship.
"I'm sorry Alex. I lied to you," I breathe.
She pauses, dragging her gaze over me. "You...about what?"
"About Onyx and I." I keep my expression straight, trying not to grimace. "We were only friends while the whole wife selection process happened, but I was desperately in love with him."
"Oh..."
She asked me if we had feelings for each other before, and I lied. I was denying how I felt to protect myself, but I should have told her that I had been in love with him for a great deal of time.
"We've since revealed our feelings, but we can't be together," I explain, clutching the strap of my bag tightly. "Either way, there's no place for me here."
I start toward the door, but she swerves in front of me, the frazzled strands of hair fallen from her bun only adding to her desperation.
"Sienna, if you're in danger, I want to help you."
"You can help. Tell Onyx I went to the beach, then try console him when he realises I'm not coming back." I dig into my back pocket, handing the slender envelope to her. "Give him this note if he starts to look for me."
Alex pauses, staring at it, then back at me again. I half expect her to refuse, to slam the door in my face before locking me in.
Instead, she reaches out with trembling fingers and takes the letter tentatively.
"Will you contact me when you're safe?" She asks softly, her brows drawing together.
"As soon as I've settled somewhere, you'll be the first person to know," I assure her.
I've considered which direction I'm inclined to go in and decided to go opposite to that. Onyx knows how I think, knows my thoughts before they even form in my head.
"Please be careful. There are people who know who you are, and will want an Alpha's mistress dead," she warns.
"I will be."
I draw her into a hug, savouring the weighted embrace of her arms around me. I'll see her again, I'm sure of it.
She let me past, and I feel her stare on my back as I rush down the hallway. I don't let out a breath until I see the front door.
That is until I realise Lucia is pacing in front of it.
She turns to me as I approach, taking in the backpack, my bloodshot eyes and tense expression. A maid must have told her I was seen frantically packing, because she's clearly not shocked to see me like this.
"Don't you dare run," she snaps as I make it to the last stair.
I don't think I've ever seen her so...unkempt. Her silken night gown is wrinkled as she hurriedly wraps it around herself. Her hair is loose, small broken strands near her scalp curling skyward, in need of smoothing down.
"You can't keep me here, Lucia." I adjust the bags strap on my shoulder, agitation gripping me as I look between her and the door.
"Whatever it is chasing you away, rethink," she hisses, her dark eyes so much like her sons.
"There is no place for me here."
She steps toward me, wringing her hands anxiously. "If you stay, we can talk this through. We can find a way to keep you both happy."
I shake my head, wishing I could fight off the lump forming in my throat. "It won't be enough."
"Please." Anguish rips through her angular features. "I promised your mother I would care for you. I promised her I would keep you safe."
I never thought I would see Lucia in such a state. It was only a few months ago that she was practically chasing me out the door, wanting me to start a new life far from her son.
I steel myself at the mention of my mother, not wanting to think about what her reaction would be to this.
She was a romantic, a lover. Like me and like Onyx. But idealism is what lead her to have me, which forced her to stay with the monster she called her husband.
I won't let idealism destroy the person I love the most in this world...I can't let it.
"My mother would want me to do this. She would want me to live," I insist.
"Think of Onyx, then." She inches further across the block the front door. "This will kill him."
I squeeze my eyes closed for a moment, fighting off a nauseating wave of guilt. Me leaving won't kill him, but me staying might.
"He's stronger than you think. Trust me, this is for the best," I tell her, shifting from foot to foot.
"You're his mate, Sienna. You cannot survive without each other," she tells me, my stomach tumbling at her insistence.
I brush my hair behind my ear, shaking my head. "You don't know that..."
No one knows that, and no one can know that until fate, or the Angel's, decide it is the right time.
"You know it. I know it. He cannot function as Alpha without you." She scans my face, seeking a crack in my hardened resolve. "And I watch you around him. You're full of life. When he leaves, something drains out of you, just like now."
I know all this, which only pains me more.
"I'm trying to save his life, Lucia." I look at the door behind her, silently willing it to open on its own so I can dash out into the night.
She recoils. "What?"
"I think you know why I'm running," I say flatly, testing a quiet theory I've secretly believed for years. "I think you've always known."
Lucia is a smart woman. I doubt she was unaware of what was going on when my father appeared with me at her front door. Her and my mother were close, and I'm certain she divulged to Lucia the nature of her relationship with my father.
Including revealing his identity.
Her mouth flattens into a hard line as we face a reality we've danced around for years. It's apparent she knows.
"He deserves to know the truth," she says quietly.
"Can you guarantee it won't lead to war?" I keep my voice hushed as I step toward her. "Can you tell me now that this won't be the last straw in his revenge fantasy? Putting aside the betrayal he's going to feel, this is only going to fuel his anger against Zion when he learns what he did to me, to my mother."
I could tell her about the threatening notes, about Onyx's fate, but it doesn't seem worth it now. She knows how dangerous Onyx is capable of becoming...she needs to believe she is saving this pack from war, rather than just saving me.
"At least take one of our transports," she relents tightly, cracking the door open.
My relief is dampened by the rain that barges down outside, a horrifying symphony that feels like it is begging me to stay.
"Thank you..." I breathe, rushing to embrace her one last time.
Her voice is muffled against my ear. "Be safe. I love you, Sienna."
"I love you too," I call out behind me, already out the door and into the storm.
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