"honey, i'm hollow,
fill me
take me to the wild,
i've been lonely."
- Sugar, Wanderhouse
☾
There's a knock on my apartment door, five o'clock on the dot.
I skip to the front door, smiling to myself, feeling positively giddy. And when I open it, Bucky stands before me holding a bouquet of red roses, wearing a smile to die for while his baby blues twinkle.
"You're adorable." I say lovingly. His old fashioned ways melt my heart.
"You're beautiful." he replies, raking his eyes up and down my body.
"Thanks." I smile shyly, looking down at my forest green silk wrap dress and my black suede chunky heeled pumps. "Come in."
He steps inside, giving me a kiss on the cheek and offers me the roses. I thank him and take them straight to the kitchen for a vase and some water, feeling Bucky's eyes on me the whole time I move about my kitchen.
Then I grab my purse and we head out.
He drives us to a local bar and as we leave the car and head inside, he starts to look nervous.
"Is this place okay?" he asks before I can say anything.
"Yeah, it's great!"
It's a nice retro-feeling space, and not too crowded tonight. There's music playing from an old jukebox and everyone looks like they're having a good night.
"We can go somewhere fancier- I've been in here a couple times and I liked it- I should've taken you somewhere nicer-"
"Bucky." I say, putting my hand on his shoulder. "It's perfect." I assure him with a smile.
His eyes soften. "You're perfect."
I can't help but blush at the sentiment. Coming from anyone else, it'd sound corny, but coming from him, it's so sweet.
We get seated and order drinks and dinner. And soon we're sipping our drinks and chatting away. We've always spoken freely to each other but it's much more relaxing not having that little voice in the back of my mind trying to remind me he's a client.
Now he really is just Bucky.
And all he wanted to do after officially becoming a free man was take little old me out on a date. And he bought me flowers.
I reach across the table and hold onto his hand, just because I can. Bucky smiles and lifts my hand from the table to kiss the back of it. I'm ready to just melt into a puddle.
Our food arrives and we dig in.
Halfway through my meal, I slip out of my seat and go to the jukebox, scrolling through the music library until I find one to add to the queue. They have an array of music from multiple decades, starting at the 90's, going back to the 30's. No wonder Bucky likes this place. It's quite nostalgic.
I take my seat and continue eating, Bucky eyeing me inquisitively.
"I picked a song for you." I smile.
He looks between the jukebox and I, then slips out of his seat and heads on over. He returns to our table and sits down, rubbing his hands together. "I picked a song for you, too." he smiles.
We continue eating until the piano intro to my chosen song begins to fill the space. I bite my lip and smile at Bucky, as Billie Holiday's voice starts to sing The Very Thought of You. Recognition falls over Bucky features as he looks at the Jukebox. He turns to me arching an eyebrow and I nod. He smiles warmly and we finish our meals as the song plays.
I can't wait to hear what song he's chosen. The last time he and I discussed music, I'd showed him my 80's playlist, so I wonder..
The beat starts and I stare across the room at the jukebox, waiting for recognition to hit. As soon as the synth notes begin, I know the song. I gape excitedly and look at Bucky.
Hungry Eyes by Eric Carmen.
I beam at him and start dancing in my seat. Bucky smiles crookedly, watching me with warm eyes. I lip sync along with the first verse, then sing quietly along with the chorus.
Bucky and I chuckle as I try to get him to sing along when the next chorus hits.
The song reaches the saxophone solo and I hype Bucky up for the upcoming chorus. We both sing to each other, earning a few looks from other bar goers, but we couldn't care less. We're far too happy.
I'm the happiest I've felt since 2018. And it's all because of the wonderful man sitting opposite me, his expression mirroring the affection I feel in my heart. In this moment, I want to tell him I love him, but it hangs on the tip of my tongue, held back by the concern of perfect timing.
"Wanna get out of here?" Bucky asks me, interrupting my train of thought with that velvety tone that soothes my soul.
I give him a closed lip smile and nod my head, grateful I bit my tongue.
"Where to now, Barnes?" I ask when we hit the street.
"There's actually somewhere else I want to take you. If that's alright with you?" he politely asks.
"Anywhere with you is alright with me." I state.
He grins at me and we hop back in my car.
Bucky drives us to our next destination, a destination that he keeps to himself. During the drive, we sing along to some more 80's music.
This is by far the best date I've ever been on and it's not even over yet.
"You know what we should do?" I say to Bucky, turning my whole body to him as Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper fades out.
"What should we do?" Bucky asks, flicking amused glances between me and the road.
"We should do karaoke with Daf, Jules and the boys." I suggest excitedly, grinning from ear to ear.
Bucky smiles at me. "That'd be fun."
"Right?" I sit back in my seat. "We'd own their asses."
Bucky chuckles beside me. He takes his hand off the steering wheel and laces his fingers with mine.
Gosh, he is just too sweet.
And there it is again. A profession of love sitting on the tip of my tongue. And again, desire for perfect timing keeps it trapped inside.
I can't have the first time I profess my love to him be in my little car. It needs to be somewhere nicer, grander. So I settle for smiling lovingly at him, and we resume our car karaoke.
Finally, Bucky parks the car. He jumps out and rushes around to my side to open the door for me, then he offers me his arm.
I link my arm with his, and before I know it, we're standing in front of a jazz club.
We gain entry and enter the gorgeous room, with intimate lighting and a live band, crooning away. There's a fancy, old style bar on one side of the room, high tables and chairs around the edges, with a dance floor in the centre.
"Oh my gosh.. This is awesome!" I say, looking at everything around me with wonderment.
We grab a drink from the bar and nab the last empty table, sipping from our glasses as we watch the band play. People come and go from the dance floor. The grace and confidence that some of the couples move with is enchanting.
"..What would you say to a dance?" Bucky asks.
"Oh, I'd love to." I answer and he smiles. "But.." I glance back at the dance floor. "..maybe after the next song."
"Are you scared?" he asks me, amusement lurking in his tone.
"I am intimidated." I admit. "I have no idea what I'm doing."
"Don't worry, doll. I'll lead." he tells me, with the sexiest of smirks.
Well, be still my heart.
I blush at his words, and the ridiculous adorableness of the pet name he's just given me.
I turn my attention back to the dance floor, focusing on the dancers as if my eyes can absorb all their movements for my body to soon imitate perfectly.
I feel more assured when I notice the amount of couples that are just dancing the best they can and having fun. Because at first glance, they seemed to know what they're doing. It's only under my scrutinous gaze that I notice they're as lost as I feel. They're just letting the music move them and having fun. Which is all I want to do.
The current song comes to an end.
"Ready?" Bucky murmurs in my ear.
I hesitate as my stomach flutters with nerves.
The musicians begin the next song and I actually recognise the tune. It's a lively rendition of In The Mood by Glenn Miller and it gives me the little kick I need to get out of my seat.
"Okay, let's go."
We hop out of our seats and Bucky takes my hand, leading me onto the dance floor.
He brings me around to face him, pulling me close as we assume our stance; my left hand clasped in his right, his other hand resting gently on my back, while my other rests on his shoulder.
I exhale shakily.
Bucky tightens his hold and brings us a little closer. "I've got you." he whispers.
Hook, line and sinker.
I nod and follow his lead as he starts to move us. We start with a sway, moving into bops and bounces, in sync with the music. I smile instantly, unable to wipe the grin from my face.
Bucky moves us side to side, before letting go of my hand and spinning me away from him. The skirt of my dress flares lightly with the gentle spin, making me smile all the more.
He pulls me back to him, our hands finding each others once again. He nuzzles into my hair while I giggle away as he spins us together.
We sway and swing about, having the time of our lives. The way he's looking at me, my heart is ready to burst.
The next song is smoother and slower, setting a more intimate mood.
Bucky draws us closer, lightly pressing our bodies together. As we sway gently to the smooth rhythm, time ceases to exist. It's just the two of us, lost in the music.
My eyes drift close as we dance cheek to cheek. All I can hear is the sensual rhythms of the instruments and all I can feel is Bucky. My hand makes its way from his shoulder to the back of his neck, while our bodies move in sync. Everything about this moment is perfect and magical. I can't imagine anything ever being better than this right here. This moment, this night, this man. I am overcome with love and affection.
I lean my head back to make eye contact and he hits me with a gorgeous smile that takes my breath away.
I drop my gaze to his lips and lean in. He meets me halfway and we share a deep kiss.
When we break apart, I look into his eyes once again.
"I love you, James Bucky Barnes." I confess. "I love you and all that you are."
I watch his face fall as he stares at me with what I presume to be disbelief. Our movements slow to almost a stop while he continues to stare. Until he lets out a light breathy laugh, his eyes becoming glossy, and we stand still while everyone twirls around us.
Then Bucky cups my face with both hands and tenderly presses his lips to mine. The music fills the space around us, only it's our lips now doing the dancing.
He wraps me in a tight embrace, enveloping me in his warmth. I hug him back, just as tight, while happy tears fill my eyes. He starts to sway us again and we continue to dance until the current song comes to an end, unable to wipe the smiles from our faces.
Our movements and touches become increasingly sensual. And arousing.
As everyone applauds the musicians and awaits the next song, Bucky whispers in my ear. "May I take you home?"
I caress his face and stare into his eyes. "Please."
He smiles and takes my hand from his face, gripping it tight, leading me off the dance floor and out of the building.
We practically skip to the car, giggling away, hand in hand. He opens the passenger door for me and leans in, giving me a long kiss before shutting the door. As soon as he's in the car, he removes his leather gloves.
Nerves swirl within me, competing for dominance against excitement, as we drive home.
Bucky and I chat about the jazz club and how much better it is than the night club I took him to a couple months ago. But we fall silent as he pulls up to a red light.
He turns and smiles at me so warmly. We both lean in and lock lips. My hands immediately grab hold of his face as I kiss him hungrily. His tongue joins the fun, until we're interrupted by the honk of a car horn behind us. We break apart and see the traffic light is now green.
I breathe out a light laugh and lean back into my seat as Bucky accelerates. He reaches over and places his warm hand on my thigh. His eyes search mine for approval and I smile encouragingly. He gives me a smile in return before looking back at the road.
Bucky keeps one hand on the steering wheel and one hand on my thigh the rest of the drive home.
I fight to keep my breathing steady with every massage and squeeze his hand delivers. Arousal attempts to overcome me as my mind soars with thoughts of his hand touching every other part of me the same way. I glance his way and see he's watching me. He licks his lips, biting on his bottom lip as he smirks at me. He knows full well what he's doing and he's enjoying it as much as I am.
We finally make it to my place and he scoops me up, bridal style, and takes me up the stairs to my apartment.
I giggle as he keeps hold of me while I fish my keys from my purse and as I unlock my door. Once inside, he kicks the door shut and walks through my dark apartment. I throw my purse, aiming blindly for the couch, before wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling his mouth back to mine, while he walks us to my bedroom.
A giggly squeal escapes me when he drops me onto my bed. I roll and crawl to my bedside and switch on my lamp before Bucky grabs my ankle and drags me back to the end of the bed where he stands.
I prop myself up on my elbows and watch as he holds my leg up, to remove my shoe. And after both my shoes are gone, he fixes his heated gaze on me.
I sit up and slowly move to the end of the bed on my knees. I take his face in both hands and pull him closer.
"Wait.." he hesitates. I gently let go of him and let my hands drop. He takes my face in his hands and softly strokes his thumbs across my cheeks, while looking intensely into my eyes.
"I love you, too." he declares.
I beam at him and he gently pulls me into a sweet, delicate kiss.
"I love your smile." he adds, before he pecks my lips once more. "I love your thoughtful, gentle mind." He kisses my forehead. "I love your caring heart." He rubs our noses before another delicate caress of our lips. "And if you let me.." he continues, looking into my eyes. "I want to love every inch of you, all night." he breathes.
My hand reaches up and strokes his face, my eyes becoming glossy from his heartfelt words.
"I'm yours." I declare in a whisper.
We share a passionate kiss, his hands moving up and down my back.
Eventually, Bucky pulls on the tie of my wrap dress. Softly, he slips his fingers under the fabric and slides it off my shoulders. It falls from my arms onto the mattress. I blindly grab at the dress and toss it to the floor. His eyes take over my body as I step off the end of the bed.
I stand in front of him, smoothing my hands over his chest and up to his shoulders. My hands glide under his jacket and slide it off his shoulders, as he did my dress, and he lets it drop to the floor.
My fingertips dip under the hem of Bucky's shirt, finally touching the skin of his stomach. He closes his eyes while I run my hands over his defined muscles.
I smile at this beautiful man before me, and lean in to kiss his neck while my hands wander further up his body. The deep sigh he exhales has me clenching my thighs.
Bucky's hands find their way to my hips and he gently pushes me back to look at me. Then he pulls his shirt over his head in one fluid motion, tossing it onto the floor.
Our lips reunite and our bodies press together, while our hands explore and our feet shuffle to the bed.
The rest of our clothing is discarded and we make it under the sheets barely separating from one another.
He hovers over me, watching me intently as he fills me, as gentle and caring as possible.
He starts slow and in full control, until he's filled me completely. His thrusts are deep, hitting the spot every time. Lost in each other, his control starts to falter, passion taking over as his rhythm gets rougher.
My eyes squeeze shut, my legs begins to shake and I let out at cry as I'm rocked with my first high of the night.
He stays inside me as I catch my breath, his eyes fixed on my face.
"Are you okay?" he whispers, hot breath hitting my face.
I nod my head.
"I'm gonna need you to talk to me, doll."
"Yes." I breathe out. "More than okay." I add with a smile.
Bucky smiles back and I caress his face with both hands. I pull his lips to mine again.
As we kiss, I wrap my arms around his neck and start to move my hips. Bucky hums into my mouth, while he still throbs between my legs.
Super soldier serum coursing through his veins, he could easily pound me into next week. I know he's holding back.
I want him to feel what I'm feeling. I need him to finish.
He follows my lead and pulls out, letting me lay him on his back so I can straddle him. I slowly lower myself onto him, eliciting moans from us both.
Hands on his chest, I brace myself as I ride him and we're lost in each other once again. And soon I'm succumbing to another orgasm. My inner muscles tense around him and he finally reaches his own.
We lay side by side, panting heavily as we come back down from our highs.
Bucky holds me close, fingertips rubbing my bare back, while I reassure him that I'm fine.
Absolutely, positively, sensationally fine.
We continue to touch, kiss, laugh and make love all through the night, until I eventually fall asleep to the sweet sound of his voice whispering "I love you."
A/ N
Bit of a long chapter this one, hope y'all don't mind.
Also, I know it's probably kinda tame to be called smut, but I wanted to keep it wholesome like the rest of the story.
Was a bit more racier when I first wrote it, but it just seemed out of place.
Anyways, hope you like this chapter! It's one of my favourites.
Thanks again for your comments and votes and for taking the time to read.
Time is precious, so I really do appreciate it. 🥰
Big love,
K.