Jungkook turns the page again and continues to read those words which were written by his husband who used to his secret admire loved him the moment he saw him. Every word just shows how much love his love always has for him he can't even describe those feelings.
12 August
Today Taetae was sad why ,because his "little bun" was sad too. He was seems so sad I don't know why but I was feeling immense pain in my heart by seeing that dull face of my little bun. He was very lost too. I just want to go and hug him tight and protect him from everyone who will try to harm and try to make him upset.
My little bun just deserves all happiness and best in the whole world and even a glimpse of sadeness should be there. But I was confused about what am I supposed to do he is a very introverted person he doesn't even talk to anyone from his class.Why will he talk to someone who will pop out in front of him like weirdo and scare him. What should I do? What should I do I kept thinking about it. An idea came in my mind should I write something good for him and give it to him.
After thinking a lot I wrote "Please don't be upset your beautiful face seems dull smile look more pretty on it so smile please little bun ヾ(＾-＾)ノ"
And smile now I just have to give it to Jungkook but wait how? After thinking a lot I know Jungkook will go to the art room for sure who I place on the top of the canvas which usually Jungkook takes. AND GUESS WHAT HE SMILE AFTER READING THAT. HE WAS SMILING AFTER READING MY WORDS I CAN'T DESCRIBE I AM IN THE OTHER WORLD. What of happiness with my little bun.
After that he went to a nearby beach to get so air seems like he really likes beaches a lot I have seen him coming here often. I noted that he likes artistic things and beaches. Nice choices I must say.
(You all might remember their date on their first day of marriage )
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Jungkook chuckle after realizing why Taehyung didn't get jealous after hearing this incident.Why would he be even jealous of himself. He must be very happy knowing that I still remember his words.
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18 September
Today I realized what I feel for my little bun it's not something normal it's very beautiful and amazing this feeling of happiness after knowing that I am in love with my little bun. I realized it today when I saw parents being happy together and dancing after knowing my brother got selected in auditions the moment I looked at them I saw appa was looking at eomma with so much admiration in his eyes and he soft caresses his cheeks. Then I asked him why he looked at eomma that he says he can't stop himself to do it's something in him that his eyes also fall on him and he helps but admire and that something in him is love.
When I realized whenever I looked at my little bun I couldn't also stop myself from admiring him there was something in my heart which made my heart happy and calm at the same increase my heart beat. I am indeed in love with him. When, how, why I don't know and I don't even want to know all want to be the person who will be the best for his little bun. If I have any flaws then I want to fade them cuz my little bun deserves the best and I will make myself the best who deserves him. I will make myself worthy of him. I will make myself the person whom he will want to.
I will do everything for you my little bun.
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Reading words which were filled with determination in them. Determination to be worthy to love him, best for him. A question arises in Jungkook's mind does he even deserve that determination and care Taehyung was giving him ? How can even someone love anyone that much? Taehyung's love for him can't be described Jungkook can feel it.
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24 January
Today I spent the bestest day of my life, which was spent with my little bun at my favorite place. It was just perfect I was holding his hands and talking to him Jungkook seemed very happy with me. When he was looking at out from there and looking at the beautiful view in front of him. How badly I wanted to tell him the view in front of my eyes is more beautiful than anything in the world. Those big beautiful eyes looking out, bright sun light falling on him making him look even more beautiful. His lips and the mole under it make the mind dizzy.
Then he asked him "doesn't it look so surreal and beautiful " I replied looking at him " "Yes it's very beautiful and surreal " It will forever be my best memories. I wish I could stop time and be in that moment forever.
It's probably our last meet in school but I promise I will meet you again Jungkook and make you fall for me and be the person who will be best for you, worthy for you it's my promise just don't be someone else. Even if you would and I will late just be happy my love because you only deserve that.
I will meet you again Jeon Jungkook and if it would be in my hand I will make it to Kim Jungkook. Doesn't it sound amazing. I will .
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That seems like the end of the general still many pages were blank. He wanted to know what happened. He again started turning pages desperately if Taehyung loved him so much he wanted to be with him then why? Why did he refuse to recognize him? Why did he push him away from himself. Did he feel unworthy of himself because his condition. Why God is so unfair to them. He just wanted to love each other nothing more . Is it that hard to be with your love.
After turning more he finally found a few pages were filled with words. He quickly wiped off his tears and began to read again.
There is no specific date on that but Jungkook knows which day is mentioned here he returned to readings it .
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After 8 years, yes 8 years I saw him again the person I always loved and i will always Jeon Jungkook he became more beautiful and he achieved his dream he meet me as a fashion designer. I wanted to keep looking at him and not want to move my eyes from his shining face and his big eyes doe looking at me. Does he still remember me?
Why was he looking at me with hope he wanted me to remember him, that affection in his eyes making me feel euphoric yet angst . I love him more than anything that will be best to get reciprocated by him but after releasing where I am today you shouldn't love me My little bun . Please don't love me back choose the best for yourself not someone like me. Who will burden on you.
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Jungkook felt heartbroken after reading those words he can't even imagine the pain his hubby is going through. His love is in front of him and loved him too but he wasn't in the conditions to tell him his love which he hid in his heart.
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Today Jungkook came in my complain, he meet with Roy who was being really good towards him I can't able see this my heart was burning watching him with little bun his flirty eyes were on him making wanted to throw him out of company and he even make my little bun uncomfortable . This Roy if he wasn't part of the board member I would kick him out. I somewhere felt guilty when I noticed Jungkook's eyes were on me like asking me to remember him. Sorry my little bun.
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I started working with Jungkook it's an amazing time I was having with him. I wish I could go back in time and stop that accident then I will be able to confess to him about my love. But why do I feel like Jungkook is ready to accept me is that his love fills my eyes on me , His caring nature , him smiling with me .
When I first saw him again I thought I will be able to stop myself filling for him more but guess what I can't able and I will never be able to stop myself from falling more and more with every passing moment I am falling for you little bun. Falling in love with Jeon Jungkook it's just like God wrote in fate, in my destiny. But he only wrote to falling for you but never having you. Isn't it cruel. (There is dry tear drops on the pages)
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Jungkook you're not in my fate I was about go against them but today after seeing my reports again I realized I am asking for so much. Please forgive me if you can, I know you fall in love with me but you move on trust me you will. You have a caring life partner you will take care of you, protect not someone like me who will be a burden on you. Thank you for loving someone like me my little bun.
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In the end the only thing I want write before putting in somewhere where I can never able see it. If it will be in front of my eyes it will make me weak which I can't be right now even if my heart bleeds but I have to let you go. But before that I want to write
I can never win Jungkook, I always lose (you read it before but only half let's unflod rest) .
Jungkook was about to read further when their room door opened and Taehyung came in the room and saw Jungkook was holding his general Jungkook to look at him with teary eyes and begin to read loudly so Taehyung can hear .
If you have time please consider reading my small story. You will surely love it if you liked my other stories.
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