Megan
"Girl her funky ass had the nerve to act like I gave a damn she was fucking and sucking on Zander" I tell Callie as I fill her in on everything that has been going on in my life the last time we talked. Callie was ready to get on Devin's private jet and come beat the silicone out of Linda and Lexis, I laughed so hard when she called Linda a "fake ass trout mouth backstabbing loose coochie old ass hag!" Callie is and will always be my ride or die.
I decided to have a little slumber party and invited Diana and Callie, but my niece Imani has a bad cold and Callie didn't feel like leaving Devin, her baby daddy with a sick ass infant. I cussed Callie and Devin both out, because they got auntie baby sick they ought to be ashamed of themselves.
I know it was probably Bryson weirdo ass who got my baby girl sick. You can't tell me different with his former hoe havin ass, I hope Cee Cee whooped his pale ass. I say it's his fault because the alabaster idiot coughs sometimes and doesn't cover his mouth or wash his nasty ass hands.
I talked to Callie for a little while longer, then she decided that I was not important anymore and hung up the phone on me and left me for dead to go jump on Devin's dick.
Jameson left my house earlier to handle grown folks business and also it was his annual poker night with his brother and cousins. He actually got his ass tagged by Garth earlier because he said something that pissed Garth off, and Garth told him to not let the suit fool him , and that he would knock his old crypt keeper ass out.
Their relationship is funny to me, but I think sometimes Jameson can get a little full of himself, and folks have to remind his ass that they are grown and are not about to play with him.
I also invited Heavenly to my little sleepover party but she has some big church event out of town. She is talking about her new blog that promotes a healthy sex life, and still being able to be the best person serving the Lord. She asked me to be a speaker for her, and I told her of course, I support her in all that she does and what she is doing is very important.
I have and will always believe in Jesus Christ. You cannot tell me shit about my Lord and saviour!
I have been through too much, and seen too much, to not believe in a higher power. And in all honesty it steams from who God has blessed me with in my life, and all he has done for me, and mines. He gave me a wonderful mother, who made sure my faith was strong and that I truly acted like a child of God.
The thing about them Christian folks that blows my mind, is that they are so judgemental. They be quick to say they serve the Lord, but look down on others, I think they forget that the God they are supposed to be serving loved everyone, and also kicked it with what society at that time deemed as the undesirable. They be quick to holler about abortion and things like that, but when folks have their babies they talk about them and make it harder on those said folks.
And don't get me started on how they treat the LMNOP community. It blows my mind how you can sit here and claim to be a child of God, but disown your own kin, because of who they choose to love, or because of their sexual orientation.
The fact that these said Christians will tell someone they are going to hell or going to burn in hell, because they are gay or have an abortion is fucking crazy to me. Also the last time I checked, the Lord Ol mighty is the only one who can send folks to hell. Everyone sins, and Jesus died on that cross, for all of our sins, even those who deny him or don't believe in him. So it really irks my nerves when folks weaponize that good book for their own personal agenda.
A couple of hours later.....
"Girl this fucking girl!" Diana mumbles as she scrolls through her phone. Her sister Candice just got out of jail for some kind of misunderstanding, and Diana was just over it.
I know her sister Candice very well. She is a retired adult film star, and she only ever really did girl on girl scenes, but she made quite a name for herself. She used to be known as "Candy Caine" And baby let me tell you her scenes were fire! She also has a thing for a pretty smile, and a phat ass. She only ever did male scenes depending on if the guy had a big dick, and was attractive, other than that she was strictly pussy only!
Diana shakes her head and her phone rings. She answers it and says "hey I have good news for you" The other voice on the other end of the phone says "lemme guess. You finally did right by your little sister and got me my own private island with nothing but big booty bitches?"
I spit out my wine from laughing, and Diana rolls her eyes, then shouts "Candice! Quit fucking playing with me! That's why your ass is in the position you're in now. Because you stay steady chasing after a big booty and some thick ass thighs!"
"Girl bye! Don't judge me. That girl said she was gonna give me some cake, she was the one that showed up to my apartment with her booty covered in icing and sprinkles with a candle on top. It's not my fault she got burned!"
Apparently what happened was Candice's little honey dip came over to her apartment, and when candice blew out the candles off her booty, she got burned. Then she tried to sue Candice, and Candice and said girl got into it, and Candice for lack of a better term pimp slapped her. The girl tried to press charges, but Candice is claiming she has alien hand syndrome, and that she couldn't control her hand, and that it had a mind of its own.
Diana and Candice discussed the charges being dismissed. And Candice and me speak briefly.
I really fuck with Candice.
We have a lot in common, and we both are troublemakers in our own way.
After Diana and Candice end their phone conversation. I filled Diana in on everything that went down with Linda, Lexis, and Zander, she shook her head and said "I never really liked Lexis. I met her once and I felt like she tried to hard and her personality just rubbed me the wrong way. I don't really like folks who are too got damn preppy and sunshine and rainbows, the shit gets on my nerves, I'm more of a Morticia Addams or Wednesday Addams"
I laughed so fucking hard cause I feel the exact same way!
I'm the type of person that I'm loyal as fuck. I'm also blindly loyal to a fault.
If I give you my all, I expect to get that in return. I understand that everyone is not the same, but at the same time I very much operate with the motto of "treat people how you want to be treated" I don't like fake ass shit or folks! I'm not a judgmental person. I have no right to judge anyone, because I didn't die on a cross and rise from the grave three days later, in my humble opinion only God can judge folks. I don't have a heaven nor hell to send anyone too!
That's like the whole shit with Rachel. Once I told her about herself and whooped that ass, I was done with the whole thing, I actually sent her some roses for her birthday the next week.
People thought I was crazy, but like I said I stand on business, and once I say what I said, I'm done with it!
I'm also very much don't like when folks fake ass try to be my friend. Or act funny wit me or have an issue with me and don't tell me. How can I fix the issue if you don't tell me what the problem is? What part of the game is that?
I'm not a fucking mind reader ladies and gentle worms!
A couple of minutes later Rico calls Diana and they start cupcaking on the phone. I take this as my opportunity to use the restroom and check in with Jameson.
As I use the restroom I pick up my phone and see like eight missed calls from Jameson and also like 10 text messages. I frown and open Jameson's thread and read the last text that says
"Get the fuck out the house now!"
I wipe my coochie and ass then pull my pants up, and head into the living room and see Diana knocked out and her phone is on the ground. Rico's name is displayed because he is calling, then also messages are coming through her phone. I frown picking the phone up, and then feel a sharp pain in the side or my neck, I fall to the ground face first then roll over to see a masked person standing over me. My eyes become too heavy to keep open and soon I'm meant with darkness.
I just want to say that I appreciate you guys for real for real...
Megan is me out of all my female leads. We think and feel the same way about a lot of things
Who needled in the neck Megan????
It might not be the person you think.....