all credits to @/ervotica on tumblr!!
a/n- rafe with a pogue!reader that just says the most out of pocket, ridiculous shit all the time. he's perpetually exasperated. you're jj in female form— really, rafe doesn't know how he ended up liking you in the first place.
you're so unserious it actually pains him. he bends over to pick his vape up off of the sidewalk and you air-hump him from behind, with sound effects and everything; you've never seen him move faster, and you squeal when he takes your face in his hands, his brow set deep on his forehead, lips pursed. it pushes your cap halfway off of your head, mussing your already frazzled hair.
"hey, idiot. look at me," he barks, expression hardening as you giggle. you smirk, tongue in cheek.
"what?"
"what the fuck is wrong with you? like actually. you're so fucking weird," he seethes through gritted teeth, unaware of the group of pogues that watch, barely concealing their laughter; you shrug innocently, putting on your best doe eyes for your grumpy boyfriend.
"what are you talking about? i didn't do anything!"
"oh, you didn't do anything?" he parrots; it's something out of a cartoon, truly– his reddened face, pinched features. if you look closely enough, you're sure you'd see steam curling out of his ears.
"nope." you pop the p and he pushes closer to you, crowding your personal space.
"you're a little fucking freak, you know that? you need psychological help."
"yeah, that's fucking rich," you snort, patting his cheek in condescension. you bite his finger when he reaches for your face again. "quit it!" you garble around the digit.
"i can't." he throws his hands up, exasperated as he strides away. "i can't with you."
you grin, scampering after him as he paces. you're bursting at the seams with childlike amusement, skipping happily until you lace your fingers through rafe's. he grumbles something rather unsavoury but still tucks you beneath his arm, scowling as you needle your way into his side.
"gonna be the death of me, kid."