Sirius Black
Tuesday, 20th March 1973.
Hogwarts
"What are you three doing here at this hour!", Madam Pomfrey whisper-yelled at Sirius, James and Peter.
It was the morning after the full moon. This was the first full moon after Sirius, James and Peter confessed to Remus that they knew his secret, so the most logical thing the three worried friends who couldn't sleep came up with was to go to the Hospital Wing and wait for Remus to return from who knows where.
Of course, they found Madam Pomfrey at the Hospital Wing. She looked tired and, as they walked in, Sirius saw her packing some potions into her bag.
"We thought that you were quite used to us bringing breakfast to Remus by now, Madam Pomfrey.", James said to her with a sly smile which earned all of them an annoyed look from the Healer.
"Yes, I am, but it's five in the morning!", she said to them as she carefully poured some potion from a big bottle into a small phial.
To Sirius, it looked like Madam Pomfrey was trying to hide her nervousness with this angry attitude. He opened his mouth to say something, but she cut him off with her threatening index finger in the air, "Not a word, Mr. Black. I have some important business to attend to.", now she pointed that finger at him, "You, Mr. Potter and Mr. Pettigrew better go back to your dormitory before I alert professor McGonagall that three of her students broke curfew."
Sirius furrowed his eyebrows. He was ninety-nine percent sure what this important business was. Madam Pomfrey finished with transferring her potions and turned away from the three Marauders, but she kept on speaking, "I now have to leave and I better not see you here when I return or—"
"We know, Madam Pomfrey.", Sirius said finally. He just wanted to spare all of them some time. If he didn't say that, Madam Pomfrey would have left to pick up Remus. He, James and Peter, of course, wouldn't go back to the dorm so, when Madam Pomfrey returned, she would have to go and get professor McGonagall instead of helping Remus. Then their Head of House would come and the Marauders would confess the same thing. It was just better to get everything over with sooner than later.
Madam Pomfrey stopped in her tracks and, to Sirius, it looked like that reaction was from shock. Then she turned to them, "I don't know what you think you know, Mr. Black, but—"
"Come on, Madam Pomfrey.", James started as he got comfortable on one of the beds, "We live with Remus. Of course we know.", he said as if he didn't find out only a few weeks ago with unintentional help from Sirius.
The Healer looked stunned, but she recovered quite quickly, "Listen, this isn't some game.", she said seriously to all of them, "This is Remus' life and if anyone finds out—"
"Nobody will find out.", Sirius reassured her, "We already talked with Remus and we know what is at stake.", there was such determination behind Sirius' words that it even surprised him.
The day when they confessed to Remus and after he finally accepted that they still liked him, Remus explained everything to them. How he wasn't even supposed to be at Hogwarts since he was a werewolf and how Dumbledore insisted on no one knowing anything. Apparently, if anyone finds out about Remus' condition, he could be expelled and his future could be ruined since the fact that he is a werewolf would become known.
"We just want to be there for him, Madam Pomfrey.", , "Please don't report us, we'll be good."
Sirius and James nodded immediately while keeping determent expressions. Sirius saw something change in Madam Pomfrey's attitude. Like some shield had been broken. The annoyance and concern seemed to be replaced with some kind of fondness, "Okay.", she said finally, "But don't touch anything.", and there was the Pomfrey they were used to.
She turned away from them again, but to Sirius' surprise, not to the Hospital exit. Madam Pomfrey started walking towards her office, bag filled with potions in hand. She stopped just in front of the door and turned back to look at three boys, "I don't know how tonight's transformation went.", she said in a sad voice, "Just be prepared for everything. If you can't handle that, it's always okay to leave and come back later. I'm sure Remus wouldn't mind."
Sirius knew that she was just looking out for them, but he found that quite unnecessary. Friends were there for each other in beautiful and ugly situations, so his answer to her didn't come as a surprise to anyone, "We can handle it.", he said clearly, fists clenched.
The silence overtook the big, white room. The Marauders were the only ones there that morning, so Sirius and Peter followed James' steps. They also got comfortable on the beds, Peter next to James and Sirius in front of the two.
"Did you see what potions she packed?", James asked them, but, when Sirius tried to recall what the potions were, his brain was empty. The only thing currently occupying his mind was Remus. He and Peter shook their heads so James continued, " ", his words, no matter how quiet, echoed in the empty room.
Just as James mentioned those two, a picture of a label on a potion bottle appeared in Sirius' mind, "I also saw .", he added.
Peter seemed even more nervous than before, "I hope she doesn't use all of them."
"Don't worry, Pete. I think maybe she brings them just in case.", James started, but before he could say anything else, Sirius cut in, "I don't think so. I read the books on transformations and it's not pretty.", he said seriously and Peter gulped.
The atmosphere seemed to change to a darker one, so James tried to reduce the tension, "Let's not make any assumptions.", and just like Sirius expected, James changed the topic, "Did you know that my dad made that Skele-Gro potion?", he said proudly and the atmosphere, in deed, changed to a brighter one as they talked about Fleamont's accomplishments.
* * *
They waited for about forty-five minutes before they heard a sound from Madam Pomfrey's office. The waiting was dreadful to Sirius, he just wanted to know if his friend was okay, but now... seconds seemed to pass like minutes as three Marauders waited for someone to emerge from the Healer's office.
From what Sirius could see, he wasn't the only one whose demeanor changed to a nervous one. Peter was again playing with his fingers and .
The wooden door finally creaked open and Madam Pomfrey emerged with a weak-looking and pale Remus. He was leaning on her left shoulder, barely able to walk. . If there were any new scars, Sirius wasn't able to see them since the tall boy wore grey sweatshirt and sweatpants.
Immediately, Sirius got up from the bed and was next to Remus in no time, taking Madam Pomfrey's place as he helped Remus get to his usual bed at the far-left corner of the Hospital. James joined him as well by taking Remus' right side and Peter scurried towards the mentioned bed to fluff the pillow and remove the white cover so that Remus could lay down.
Remus gave all of them a questioning look, but he didn't say anything, probably because a few extra hands came in handy in his current state. Sirius and James helped him lay down and, as soon as his head hit the pillow, Peter threw the cover over him. Remus gave all of them a slight nod of appreciation before Madam Pomfrey ordered them to move away from the bed so that she could work in peace.
The three Marauders obeyed without a word of protest. They all sat down on the nearest bed and waited. None of them spoke, they wanted to provide Madam Pomfrey with a silent environment and cause no distractions.
Needless to say, Sirius was shocked. Yes, he expected this, but still it was different when you read about something like this and when you see it in person. He read countless of books about werewolf transformations and their consequences so that he could find a way to reduce them. But still... this wasn't some unknown person with lycanthropy from a book, this was his friend.
The last time Sirius showed up this early Remus was already healed and peacefully sleeping in bed. It was the morning when he finally put all the pieces together and discovered Remus' secret. But this... this was a whole different experience.
James and Peter seemed like they were in a similar state so Sirius tried to lift their spirits a bit, "Nothing Madam Pomfrey can't fix, right?", he whispered as low as possible and James and Peter gave him a small smile, "Right.", the two of them said, but then the nervous silence continued.
It took Madam Pomfrey fifteen minutes to emerge again from behind the curtains of Remus' bed, "He'll be okay. This full moon was rougher than usual."
The Marauders all nodded in relief, but their faces must have still been pale since Madam Pomfrey came to sit next to them on the bed, "Don't worry, he just needs rest and he'll be as good as new.", she said to them with a sad smile, "You can go in there and keep him company, but I gave him a small dose of Sleeping Draught so that he can rest for a bit before breakfast.", she patted Peter on the shoulder and then she stood up and went into her office.
Sirius, James and Peter all got up as well and pulled the curtains of Remus' bed open so that they could sit in the visitor's chair next to his bed. Sirius was amazed at how Remus looked after Madam Pomfrey took care of him. The frown, which was probably from pain, disappeared and the tall boy seemed to be sleeping peacefully.
Sirius released a breath he didn't know he was holding. They just sat there in, now calm, silence. The unsettling and nervous atmosphere disappeared as soon as the Marauders saw that their friend was okay.
Now, minutes seemed to go by fast and it was already 06:42am which meant that breakfast already started. Sirius yawned from lack of sleep, "We should probably go and get breakfast.", he suggested, breaking their tranquil state.
"Yeah.", James yawned as well as he stood up to stretch his limbs, "Someone should probably stay here in case Remus wakes up.", he then turned to Sirius, "You should stay and Pete and I will get breakfast since you know the most about werewolves. Just in case he needs something."
Sirius and Peter both nodded at that so, a few minutes later, Sirius was left alone with Remus behind the closed, white curtains.
T , just like that first morning when Sirius saw him like this. The sight again reminded Sirius of some painting. He just felt so fulfilled while watching Remus in this peaceful state.
He sighed and propped his elbows on his knees. Then Sirius rested his head in his hands. Remus' lips were slightly parted and small freckles danced all over his face. The slim scar that went from his ear to his jaw now looked paler than before Christmas break. Still very much visible, but paler.
Sirius had a very strong urge to touch it. To run his fingers over it.
Unconsciously, he leaned in. He just felt this need to be closer to Remus, to examine his face, every detail and every freckle. He reached with his hand towards the slim scar. Up this close, it looked kind of beautiful. Like a sliver river decorating the desert filled with freckles.
His fingertips were inches away from Remus' skin when, suddenly, Sirius realized what he was doing. He quickly tried retracting his hand, but Remus must have felt something since his eyes slowly fluttered open.
Sirius was still very close to him, but once hazel and grey eyes found each other, the closeness seemed forgotten. Sirius' hand was still near Remus' scar since, once their eyes locked, he completely forgot to move it away.
The sunrays looked beautiful while showering Remus' face. His sandy curls had fallen over his forehead. One longer curl was poking at his eye, but Remus didn't seem to mind.
He noticed Sirius' hand and, to Sirius' surprise, Remus reached out for it. Then he slowly pulled it towards his scar, like he knew what Sirius wanted to do the whole time. The moment when Sirius' fingertips fell onto the silver line, Remus retreated his own hand. It was like he gave Sirius a silent permission.
And Sirius did what he originally wanted.
He gently moved his finger from near Remus' ear, all the way down to his jaw. As the scar came to an end, Sirius looked at Remus again. The tall boy was looking curiously at him, like he wanted to ask Sirius something. And then he did, "Why aren't you disgusted?", he whispered.
The question seemed very silly to Sirius so his face broke into a small smile, "There isn't anything to be disgusted by.", he said simply in the same, quiet voice.
"But there is.", Remus said, "I see people staring at it.", he now ran his own hand over the silver scar. Near his jaw, his and Sirius' fingers met. It was just a brief touch, an innocent one, but it sparked something in Sirius that he never felt before.
All he could think about was how silly anyone who was disgusted by this beautiful scar was, "He jests at scars that never felt a wound.", Sirius whispered to Remus, "Don't let anyone who hasn't experienced what you have affect you.", he said as he retracted his hand.
For a moment, Remus seemed like he was really thinking about Sirius' words and then his face broke into a slight grin, "Shakespear?", he questioned.
Sirius squinted his eyes, "I need to get to know him before I travel back in time.", he tried to justify, but Remus' face now turned into a smirk, "And reading Romeo and Juliet will help, I presume?"
"Shut up.", Sirius leaned back into his chair while trying to sound annoyed, but the smile on his own face gave him away, "I think it's beautiful, by the way.", Sirius didn't know why he had said that, it just felt like a right thing to say. A right and truthful thing.
Remus lifted one eyebrow in confusion, "It's a tragedy.", he stated simply and this made Sirius laugh.
"Not the play.", he shook his head, "The scar."
There was silence after that. From Remus' expression, Sirius suspected that the boy didn't really believe him. This turned out to be true as soon as Remus spoke again, "But why? It's an ugly scar on my freaking face."
Sirius thought for a moment. The scar wasn't ugly to him moments before when he was looking at it. It never even occurred to him that Remus or anyone else could think of it as ugly. When Sirius saw a slim silver line, he saw something completely different, "I don't think it's ugly. It's like a river that flows through a desert. A river that gives it life."
And this time, a big, bright smile overtook Remus' face which also made Sirius smile. Remus opened his mouth to say something else. but was interrupted by the sound of curtains being pulled open.
"Who's hungry?", James yelled enthusiastically while Peter struggled to balance a tower of waffles on his tray.
A/N:
Thank you for reading!This is one of my favourite chapters so far, but I think I will say that for every wolfstar chapter :)Hope you liked it too <3