The night had stretched on and he still hadn't returned. She could feel the dried trails of tears on her cheeks, her face stiff with fear. Shadowheart lay curled up beside her on the bed, her presence a small comfort against the overwhelming sense of dread that consumed her body since last evening. His words rang in her head like a twisted mantra: I hope you die screaming, I hope you die screaming...
And the worst part was, from the look of his eyes, she knew he had meant every word.
As the first rays of morning stretched across the Elfsong room and Astarion was still nowhere in sight, she knew she couldn't stay there any longer. What if something terrible had happened to him? He had no weapons, no clothes, no coin... The thought twisted her stomach into knots. She needed to talk to him. Needed to explain everything to him.
The weight of her decision hung heavy on her heart as she slowly rose from the comfort of her bed. She took extra care not to disturb Shadowheart, who was still fast asleep beside her. The rest of their companions also seemed to be in deep slumber, their soft snores filling the room with a peaceful rhythm. With careful movements, she began to pack her belongings into a small bag, trying not to make any noise. The only sounds were the soft rustle of fabric and the occasional creaking of floorboards under her feet. Once she had everything she needed, she tiptoed towards the door and gently closed it behind her, leaving the others undisturbed in their dreams.
Once she was out of earshot, she released a heavy breath.
"Tav?" Wyll's voice broke the silence of the hallway, causing Tav to jump in surprise.
She turned around to find him standing there, her hand still gripping the doorknob.
"Wyll? What are you doing here?" she asked, trying to sound calm and collected even though her heart was still racing.
Wyll's expression was a mix of confusion and concern as he looked at her. "I could ask you the same thing," he replied.
Tav's mind raced as she tried to come up with an excuse. "I...I needed some fresh air," she said lamely, gesturing towards the door.
"At this time?" Wyll raised an eyebrow skeptically. His gaze was soft as he observed her. "Isn't it a bit early to leave?"
Tav's heart sank as she looked into Wyll's concerned eyes. She considered telling him the truth; if any of her companions would understand her motives, it would definitely be heroic, gentle and compassionate Wyll.
"I am going to look for Astarion."
Wyll's smile wavered and the playful light faded from his eyes.
"I had a feeling you would," He sighed, setting aside his wine cup and getting closer to her. "Yesterday was quite something. You must be feeling shaken."
Tav felt the familiar sting of tears in her eyes. Gods, why was she like this? She turned away from Wyll, unable to meet his understanding gaze.
"I failed him," she whispered, her voice cracking with emotion.
Wyll's hand left her shoulder and gently turned her towards him so that their eyes met. "No, Tav. You did what was right. A pact with the devil is never a good idea, trust me on that."
"But I took away the only chance at freedom," she sobbed.
Wyll's face softened as he gently brushed away Tav's tears with his thumb. "You did what you had to do to protect him," he reassured, his tone firm. "We both know that the ritual would have trapped him just as much as it would have freed him." He smiled slightly. "And when we find Astarion, he'll understand too."
Tav's heart ached at Wyll's words. She knew he was right, but the guilt and regret were still eating away at her.
Tav looked down at her hands, "I'm sorry, Wyll. I didn't want to drag any of you into this mess, especially not anymore than I already have."
Wyll shook his head gently, "No need for apologies, Tav. We all have our own battles to fight. And as your friend, all I want is for you to find happiness."
She brushed a lock of hair behind her ear, meeting Wyll's understanding gaze with a small smile. "It's just hard not to worry about Astarion."
Wyll let out a soft chuckle, his eyes sparkling in the early morning light. "Astarion may be many things, my friend, but helpless isn't one of them." Wyll sighed heavily, scratching at his stubbled chin as he looked toward the closed door of the inn. "Our Astarion... He's not one to wear his heart on his sleeve, I'll give you that. But he's... changed since meeting you."
Tav blinked in surprise at his words. "Has he?"
Wyll chuckled softly, running a hand lightly through his hair as he leaned against the wall. "Well for starters," he said, "he's actually stopped to listen to someone else for once in his life. You have shown him another side of life he hadn't seen in centuries. Kindness. Love. And that is something this dreamer's heart can appreciate."
The thought of Astarion finding some solace and happiness in their brief time together brought a small smile to her face.
"He deserves it," she said softly, her eyes on the closed door once again. "He's been through so much. I can't even begin to understand the pain he carries."
Wyll nodded in understanding. "None of us can," he said. "But I believe you have given him a glimmer of hope that maybe things can be different."
Tav nodded. She was feeling a determination unlike any she had known before. Her heart was set on finding Astarion and mending their relationship, no matter what it took. She knew they would.
"Thank you, Wyll," she said gratefully, her strong hands gripping his in a firm shake. "I needed to hear that."
He chuckled lightly, patting her hand before stepping back. "From one dreamer to another," he said with a wink. "We've got to stick together."
Tav gave Wyll a final nod before setting off, leaving her weapons and armor behind at the room. The morning air was cool against her skin as she stepped out of the Elfsong Tavern. She stood on the cobbled street, her mind racing as she tried to recall any place Astarion may have mentioned frequenting in Baldur's Gate besides the numerous taverns, but her efforts were fruitless. The faint smell of wet stone and brewing coffee filled her senses as she scanned the bustling streets for any sign of her elusive companion. Where in the hells could he have gone?
As she walked numerous streets, she felt the city stirring around her. Baldur's Gate was coming alive with the break of day; vendors were setting up their stalls, peddling goods from exotic spices to finely crafted weapons. The air buzzed with energy, and under different circumstances, she would have loved to explore this side of the city.
But not today. Today, her mind was too consumed with worry for Astarion.
For what seemed like hours, she combed the grim streets of Baldur's Gate, desperately seeking any trace of her missing companion. Now, she found herself in a narrow passage near the bustling docks, an eerie chill creeping down her spine. Before she could even process where she was, a sound behind her caused her to whirl around, heart pounding against her rib cage. The alley was cloaked in darkness, the tall buildings looming over her like foreboding sentinels. As she strained her eyes to make out any shapes in the shadows, a massive figure began to approach with menacing steps.
"That is a nice necklace, lady," a gruff voice said. "Hand it over and no one gets hurt."
She tore her gaze from the figure to look down at the pendant around her neck - an intricately-designed piece of jewelry that was a gift from Arabella's deceased parents. There was no way in hell she was going to part with it. Her first instinct was to grab for her longsword, but her hand came up empty. She cursed herself for leaving all of her weapons behind at Elfsong.
"I'm afraid that's not possible," she said evenly, trying not to betray the fear that was gnawing at her insides.
A menacing laugh echoed through the brick walls, sending shivers down her spine. "Then I guess we'll have to do this the hard way."
Before she could react, he lunged at her. Instinctively she sidestepped his attack, but without a weapon in hand, she knew this wasn't a fight she could easily win. Not with a man his size. As he pushed further into her space, unveiling a wicked dagger from beneath his cloak, a fleeting thought crossed her mind: would this be how it ended? In a dirty allyway of all places? Would all of their battles and sacrifices be for nothing?
Before Tav could retaliate, another figure appeared beside them.
"How awfully typical of you to walk alone into a deserted alley and end up getting robbed."
The new voice was smooth, with a lilt of amusement woven in with scorn. Tav's heart pounded in her chest as she recognized the speaker.
Her assailant paused, looking warily over his shoulder at Astarion, who leaned lazily against the brick wall, the early morning light casting an ethereal glow around him. Astarion's crimson eyes glinted dangerously as he looked from Tav to the man.
The thug sneered at Astarion. "And who might you be?"
Astarion shrugged nonchalantly, pushing off from the wall and stepping into the dim light. "Oh, nobody special." He cracked his knuckles, the slightest smirk playing on his lips. "Tell me, is mugging the first thing they teach in thug school? Or are you just unusually incompetent?"
The man growled, clearly not liking being mocked. He made a move towards Astarion, whose smirk widened into a grin that showcased his razor-sharp fangs. It happened so fast Tav hardly had time to react; one moment, the thug was standing upright, snarling and waving his knife; then next, he was sprawled on the ground unconscious.
"Thank you for the gift, how very kind of you." the vampire added, taking the dagger that was now on the floor. She would have rolled your eyes at his theatrics, but her heart was beating so hard at the sight of him, alive and unharmed, that all she could do was stare.
"Astarion..." her voice wavered, "You're okay." It wasn't a question but a mere statement of relief.
"This is hardly the hero's welcome I was expecting," he quipped, tucking the stolen dagger into his belt. He then turned to regard her, his smirk fading into something softer. "But I suppose it will have to do."
Tav moved closer to him, her gaze scanning his body for any injuries. He was still shirtless and caked in blood, but she breathed a sigh of relief upon realizing that it was mostly from Cazador and not him.
"I was worried about you, I-" she choked on a sob, her eyes filling with tears. Her heart raced and her thoughts whirled as she tried to express all the worry and fear she had been holding in, all the pain and anger, but the word didn't seem to come to her mouth. But she didn't have a chance to speak as suddenly, he was there. His arms wrapped around her body in an embrace she had never felt before. It was as if he was holding on for dear life, as if he couldn't bear the thought of letting her go.
Tav let herself relax into his arms, her own wrapping around his waist as she buried her face in his chest. The smell of him, the soft coldness of his skin, everything was so familiar to her. They stood there, holding each other in the dimly lit alleyway, and Tav couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sense of relief and comfort. She had been so scared for Astarion's safety, and now that he was back in her arms, all she wanted to do was hold onto him forever.
Astarion rested his chin on top of her head and let out a contented sigh.
"I'm sorry," Astarion murmured into her hair, his voice wavering too. "I have treated you terribly," Astarion pulled back, his hands cupping her face as he looked into her eyes. "I never should have left you in the first place," he said, his voice filled with regret.
Tav's heart ached at the sincerity in his words. She wanted to be angry at him, to yell and scream and make him feel guilty for leaving her behind. She had thought of the many things she would say to him when she encountered him again: I hate you, I'm sorry, I love you...
But this, she didn't expect this. The vulnerability he was showing. The broken look in his face. As she looked into his eyes, all she could see was the pain and regret that mirrored her own.
"I- I don't know what to say," Tav stammered out, her voice trembling.
Astarion's hands dropped from her face and he took a step back, giving her space. "You don't have to say anything," he said softly. "I just...I needed to see you again. To make things right for once."
She stood silently, trying to process her thoughts. Before she could say anything else, though, Astarion continued.
"I didn't mean anything I said in Cazador's place. I wasn't myself. I didn't see the full picture." His eyes were glazed, as if reliving a memory. "If I had carried on with the ritual, I would- I would have done unspeakable things to you. I would have become like him." He took a shaky breath. "And you knew. Because you saw the potential in me. You saw someone else I could be. Someone... better."
Tav swallowed, her eyes welling up again. "Astarion... "
"Wait," he cut her off, raising a hand. "I need to say this." He looked down, as if trying to compose his thoughts, "I'm... not entirely sure what came over me back there," he confessed, his gaze fixed on the ground. "But I do know one thing for certain...I don't want to be that person. Not again." He looked up at her then, a flicker of hope in his dark eyes. "I love you. I love this. And I want it all" he paused awkwardly before continuing, "that is, if you want to take me back, of course."
She stared at him, his confession echoing in her ears. She searched his face for any hint of deceit but found none. He was looking at her with such intensity, such sincerity that it took her breath away. She couldn't believe it. After everything that had happened... he was standing in front of her, asking for a second chance. Telling her he loved her. She knew there were countless things they needed to discuss, so much to resolve between them. But it could wait, they would have plenty of time for that later.
She took a deep breath, trying to steady her nerves, before finally meeting his gaze. "Astarion," she began, her voice trembling slightly. "Of course I forgive you. You know I love you. And I would do anything for you." Tav's words hung in the air for a moment before Astarion's face broke into a wide grin. He was about to speak but she covered his mouth. "But. If you ever say something like that again, if you ever leave me like that again, this... us. Will be over. For good."
Tav could see the excitement in Astarion's eyes despite her words.
"Oh darling, I would never," he said earnestly. "I promise. From now on, I will only be good Astarion. Well, as good as I can be, of course. Selfless as I am, even I have my limits."
A small smile tugged at the corners of Tav's lips as she looked at the vampire. Despite everything, she couldn't help but feel a sense of hope and happiness at his words.
"I believe you," she said softly, reaching out to gently place a hand on his cheek. "And I forgive you."
Astarion's face lit up with relief and gratitude, and he leaned into her touch. "Thank you, my love," he breathed, his voice filled with emotion. They stood like that for what felt like an eternity, until a low groan caught their attention. They looked at the robber, stirring on the ground.
"Well, I believe that's our cue. We should go back with the rest of our esteemed companions. I'm sure they will be so very excited to see me."
Tav chuckled as she followed Astarion out of the alleyway and back towards the Elfsong, their hearts still racing from the events that had just transpired. As they turned onto the busy street where the tavern was located, Astarion suddenly stopped, causing Tav to nearly bump into him.
"Is everything alright?" she asked, her brows furrowed in concern.
Astarion didn't answer, instead he turned her towards him and pulled her into a soft kiss. Tav's eyes widened in surprise before she melted into the kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck. It felt like an eternity before they finally pulled apart, both of them breathing heavily.
Astarion gazed down at her with a soft smile. "I just couldn't resist," he said, his voice husky. "You look stunning in my shirt."
————————————————————————————————
From that point on, both of them worked on rebuilding their relationship. Astarion stayed true to his promise of being a better person, and Tav could see the effort he was putting in every day. She was grateful for this new side of him, one that she had never seen before, but a part of her couldn't help but wonder what had sparked such a sudden transformation, almost overnight. Despite her lingering curiosity, Tav made the conscious decision to let go of her concerns about Astarion's change. There were more pressing matters at hand to focus on anyway.
After successfully defeating the Elder Brain and putting an end to the reign of the Absolute, she thought their journey would finally come to an end and they could finally rest. However, they soon found themselves faced with the daunting task of rebuilding Baldur's Gate, which had been left in shambles after the final battle. Astarion didn't seem bothered by not being able to walk in the sun anymore, or the fact that they couldn't start searching for a cure right away. He assured her that they would find a way eventually, much to her surprise. It was a far cry from the hopeless vampire she had first met.
Time went by so fast after that, as Tav and her companions were hailed as heroes, and they were given every luxury that came with their new fame. They all had a mansion at their disposal, but Tav and Astarion chose to settle into a small house near the sea. It was a cozy home, with a breathtaking view of the ocean from their porch.
The vampire seemed content with their new life, away from all the chaos and the threat of an imminent death. He spent his days reading books from Tav's collection or sketching in his journal. But it was during their nightly walks on the beach when Tav saw him truly come alive. Underneath the starry sky, Astarion would take her hand and dance with her on the sand, spinning her around until they were both breathless with laughter. They talked about everything and anything - their pasts, hopes for the future, silly jokes and stories from their adventure. And she couldn't help but fall more in love with him every day.
Six months after the final battle, Withers paid them a visit and extended an invitation for a reunion with their friends, which they eagerly accepted. Tav was filled with excitement at the thought of seeing her friends again. She had missed them dearly, despite the frequent letters they exchanged. She couldn't wait to catch up on all that had happened in each other's lives since they parted ways.
The night of the reunion arrived, and she couldn't contain her happiness at seeing everyone gathered once again. Lae'zel, Gale, Shadowheart, Wyll and even Scratch were there, each of them looking just as pleased to see them as they were. The air was alive with chatter and laughter, and lively tunes being played by talented bards had everyone singing along and indulging in endless drinks and merriment. As the night wore on and the drinks kept flowing, Tav found herself fully immersed in the moment, swaying to the music with her companions and sharing hearty laughs. She was completely swept away by the euphoria of it all that she almost didn't notice Astarion making his way towards her with a dazed expression on his face. He pulled her into his arms, and for a moment, they simply danced in silence, their bodies moving in perfect harmony. Then he leaned down and whispered in her ear, "I can't wait for you to meet her," before pulling back with a mischievous smile.
She chuckled at his cryptic words, raising an eyebrow. "Meet who?" she asked, her voice slightly slurred from the ale.
"Our daughter," he whispered, a note of awe in his voice.
Tav's heart jolted at his words as a wave of confusion washed over her. "What are you talking about, Star? We don't..."
"That night after Cazador, a man named G'axir showed me the... power of the stars, or whatever. He was ancient and spoke in riddles, just like ol' Withers here!" He snickered, swaying slightly.
Tav furrowed her brow in drunken confusion. "And what does that have to do with us having a daughter?"
But his mind was elsewhere. "He showed me the future. Can you believe it? Actually, he showed me three futures. But two of them were..." he shuddered, "ugh, nevermind."
"Astarion, I think you drank way too much boar bloo-"
"But the good future! Aha! That is the one we are heading towards. And in that future, we have a child, Tav. A beautiful little girl. She has your eyes... and my devilish charm, of course."
Tav couldn't help but laugh at him. "You're kidding, right? You expect me to believe all this? That you went into the future? And that we have a...a daughter? From that future?"
Astarion looked a bit hurt by her laughter, but he quickly replaced it with his usual smirk. "I knew you'd find it hard to believe, that's why I didn't tell you before. But it's true! I swear on... whatever god suits you."
She shook her head at him, her laughter dying down to a soft chuckle. "And you mean to tell me that is why you had changed your mind when I found you that morning?"
Astarion paused, his face softening as he reached out to gently brush a strand of hair from her face. "Yes," he admitted softly. "Seeing her... Seeing you and her together in that future made me realize I wanted more than power. That I wanted a life. But to be honest, my memory is a bit hazy at the moment, so I could be wrong..."
Tav rolled her eyes, but her laughter had died out completely now. Despite the ale coursing through her veins, she could feel the sincerity of his words. "Are you serious, Star?"
He nodded, taking both her hands in his now. "I've never been more serious about anything in my life."
"A child..." she mused.
"Yes." Astarion's eyes shone intensely as he gazed at her.
Tav was silent for a moment, her mind buzzing with the implications of what Astarion had just told her. She was way too drunk for this, but she couldn't deny that a small part of her wanted to believe him. She reached out and placed her hand on Astarion's cheek, her eyes searching his.
"If you are jesting me because I'm drunk I swear-"
A mischievous glint danced in Astarion's eyes as he interrupted her with a sly smile. His hand caressed hers, pulling it closer to his cheek. "Don't you trust me, my love?" He whispered, his gaze never leaving hers. "I assure you, seeing our daughter in my visions was beyond anything I could imagine."
Tav looked into his eyes - those beautiful hellish orbs that she had fallen for - and saw a sincerity that made her believe him, despite the absurdity of it all. She felt an unusual heat rising in her cheeks as she thought about their hypothetical child - their little girl.
"You're serious about this..." She whispered, her voice barely audible over the clamour around them.
He chuckled and continued, "But that's not the end of it! I was a tailor in the city, catering to the annoying noblewomen. And you, my dear, were a teacher to sad orphan kids."
Tav couldn't help the smile that spread across her face at Astarion's words. She could almost see it - a quaint little shop filled with beautiful fabrics and clothes designed by Astarion himself, and her teaching young minds in an orphanage. She had never pictured herself as a teacher, but as she thought about it...
"That sounds lovely," she said softly, her hand still resting against his cheek.
Astarion's lips curled into a small smile at her response. "I thought so too."
Tav's heart fluttered at the look on Astarion's face. She leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on his lips, savoring the lingering taste of blood. Wether he was being honest or not, it was a beautiful picture of their future together, and she appreciated it endlessly.
"Hey, lovebirds, I didn't come all the way from fucking Avernus just so I have to watch you two snoggling like teenagers!"
Tav and Astarion were brought back to the present by Karlach's sudden appearance. The tiefling was grinning widely as she stood between them, her arms crossed over her chest.
"Oh, dear Karlach, don't be envious of our endless affection," Astarion playfully retorted.
Karlach chuckled and nudged him with her elbow with enough force to send him tumble. "Hey, vamp boy! Don't be such a grump. We're celebrating, remember?"
Tav couldn't help but laugh at the banter between them.
"Come on, let's get back to the party," Karlach said, gesturing towards the bonfire where their other companions were now standing on tables, singing obnoxiously off-key songs. Tav and Astarion followed her, their fingers still intertwined.
She gazed up at the twinkling stars, which seemed to sparkle in response. And in that moment, she was certain; visions or not, their future would shine brighter than any star could ever foretell.