"A young girl named Isabel was discovered dead yesterday at her house. The recent deaths have spurred a number of rumors, the main question being whether or not these murders were actually connected. As released by the police , using statements from families and associates of victims, it has been discovered that there are glaring patterns amongst the deaths of all the victims, meaning they are most likely being committed by a group or a person. Concerning the issue, the divisional head of police assured the residents during yesterday's briefing that he and the special task force that had been created to find this person or group of people, will not rest until justice has been served. He went further by urging residents to report any suspicious individual whether from strangers or family as no can be trusted in these perilous times. That's it for tonight and we'll see you again tomorrow."
No one can be trusted.
My mind travelled back to mummy's death, the stained windshield, the foul smell that caressed the tang of blood. My heart thudded. Disgust breathed down on me again, bathing me in the need to shower despite having showered thrice this evening already. No matter what I did I could still feel the sticky blood congealed on my knees and the paste spreading down my face like water.
I jolted out of my reverie before I walked past our grand sitting room. The tray I held cooled my palms slightly, a hot plate of jollof rice and chicken on top of it. The aroma made me feel sick in my stomach despite myself I pushed past it and walked through the halls before ascending up a wide wooden staircase. Soon I reached my step sister's door and I suddenly felt dread pile in my stomach.
It's just Jemimah.
My body almost recoiled in knowing, any wrong move would result in a beating from both mama and worse off, her father. I swallowed the lump in my throat as I laid my hand on the door handle, balancing the tray with my other hand.
In and out.
The palpitating of my heart accompanied with the increase of my salvation reminded me that my mindless chant wouldn't work. I pushed a hand into the pocket of my apron that held the doll and squeezed it slightly.
"Worrying would never make the situation turn out better, just breathe and everything would turn out fine."
I followed mother's advice and inhaled. All it brought along was the alluring smell of the rice with the thick perfume that Jemimah usually wore, the one that Jemimah had lied that I had broken. I refused to give into the memory that wanted to bubble out of the box that stayed at the corner of my mind. Finally, I knocked.
"Who is it?" Her voice came through and I didn't like the fear that came through at the sound.
She's younger than you, you know.
That doesn't mean you have any power over her.
That's because you're a stupid little coward.
"It's me." I stilled the thoughts in my head.
"You may come in."
I don't need your permission to let myself in.
But you know you do.
Opening the door, the familiar light walls covered with pink decorations of her private living room filtered into my eyes. The heave scent of her perfume almost choked me as she sat, cross legged by the largest of the sofas that circled the glass table that shimmered underneath the chandelier. I stood by the corner, wanting nothing more than to drop it all and leave it but I knew what that would result to.
"She almost poisoned me!" Jemimah shouted and the belt snapped at my back. I rolled away, howling in pain as mummy shouted for mama to stop.
My eyes stung, the deep longing intensifying in my chest.
"Hey! I'm talking to you!" My head snapped back to an obviously annoyed looking Jemimah. Her pink lips curled downwards, her shining almond eyes narrowed in threatening.
"Bring me my food! If you're not careful I will tell Mama that you intentionally wanted to starve me!" Panic settled in my chest, I immediately went to drop the tray onto the glass table, my flip flops jamming against the cream tiled floor.
"Rubbish." She eyed me with fake eyelashes that proved too large for her eyes. Once she sat and took a bit from it, my heart clenched in anticipation.
Suddenly, she threw the tray with the plate onto the floor, the sound of shattering ceramic following with her heavy breaths. Fear rippled within me.
"What is the meaning of this nonsense that you just gave me?! Didn't I tell you to stop putting crayfish in my rice?"
"I am sorry I for-"
How could you forget?
"You forgot?! That's how you would forget and kill me abi?" Fear gripped me as I imagined mama's reaction. A tense silence settled over us. I knelt down, picking the pieces of ceramics with trembling fingers when the doll fell out of the pocket and rolled to the floor. Frantically, I moved to grab the doll but Jemimah got to it before I could.
My throat lurched.
"Please give it back."
She took it and examined it, eyes skimming the surface.
"I never knew you liked dolls especially ugly ones.." She eyed it in disgust.
You never knew me.
"Just give it back." The panic in me rose as I stood up.
"Who gave it to you?" She stalked backwards, evading my advancements with curious eyes.
"It doesn't matter." I tried to pry it out of her grip again but she pulled it out of reach.
"It does, doesn't it? You wouldn't be chasing me if it wasn't so, spill the beans."
"You're always getting mummy's attention while she leaves us with nothing!"
"Just please give-"
"Tell me idiot or your doll gets it!" She pointed it at the iron standing fan by her side, the gaps between the metal rings showing off the fast spinning grey blades. Another shaky breath escaped my chest. She stood there, shaking the doll more as it neared the fan. When my chest almost failed me I finally shouted,
"Stop! It's mummy that gave me!" Immediately a sad look crossed her eyes but what followed after was one I knew all too well.
"Take our relationship as pure rivalry. I will get mummy to hate you mark my words." That resolution that burned in her eyes scared me more than her words could.
"So mummy gave you this." I could almost hear the pain in her voice but my throttling heart snuffed out whatever pity I would have. She brought it closer to the fan.
No!
"If i can't have it-" Before she completed her statement, I tackled her to the floor without thinking. The air left my lungs, my arms tight with tension. She raised her arm, clutching the doll as she moved to punch me with her free hand. I avoided her attack. In a move to free the doll from her, my leg pressed into her throat making her toss the doll aside. A fit of coughs escaped her as I rushed off her before grabbing the doll. But the relief didn't last when I heard her retreating steps and screams as she exited the room.
My heart thudded rapidly. The fear of mama's anger rekindled within me, like a phoenix rising from the ashes. The emotion that had stirred me into action washed clean from my eyes, leaving me with what would soon be a bloody aftermath.
Why didn't you think?
But at least now you weren't a coward.
Sure not showing cowardice is good when it could cost your meals and maybe even your life!
I stood up and left the room.
Once again the absence of mummy beside me screwed my heart tightly.
"But she slapped my granddaughter!" Mama called, her hand still around the last of my luggage that she wanted to throw out. Mummy stood beside me, fuming and her eyes ablaze with an anger I had never seen so boldly scrawled onto her face.
"And that is why you think it sensible to throw her out? Don't siblings always fig-"
"Do not compare my Jemimah to your mistake!" Jemimah stood beside Mama, her face bent to avoid mummy's angry eyes. Although I felt saddened by mama's words, annoyed by the fact that something so silly would be taken so seriously but I couldn't help but feel a bit sad. I knew mummy loved Jemimah but, it felt like mummy's anger towards mama on days like this also painted Jemimah in a bad light.
"Zara is not a mistake." She pulled me behind her before taking the box inside.
I was only shielded that day because mummy had stepped in. Now, my chest burnt with a fear that I didn't know still resided within me. Walking to my room, my insides turned with a tingle of agitation. Mama had been bad to me even before mummy had been killed. The thought alone sent me almost toppling into the door frame.
Don't think about it.
Don't think about it.
Despite my pleas, my heart paced faster at the thoughts of her death that ransacked my being. My eyes burnt and the warm taste of blood caked my mouth sending arrows of pain into my chest. I fought through it, climbing through the desperation to cling to the fact that this was a nightmare that I would soon wake from.
But I knew it wasn't.
I pushed my way inside, knowing I only had a few minutes to do what I needed. I had my bath, scrubbing at my blister-covered skin that ached to be washed. Even after I had changed into a set of new clothes, the pasty feeling of blood still settled over my skin like glue. The hairs on my neck tingled.
My eyes filled with tears as I took a biscuit that I had locked in my wardrobe just in case this thing would happen again. I also sighted the 1000 naira note that mummy had given me the day before all this began. Now, all I could see on the paper was streaks of blood and her dead face. I dropped it with nausea washing over me. Then I grabbed a couple of my textbooks, a thatched blanket and slammed everything into a tiny knapsack.
I could hear the footsteps coming from far down the corridor. I braced myself, wanting nothing more than to settle down and cry. But I kept my front up, my eyes guarded as I made sure to keep my mouth firmly shut.
"Mama beat me-"
"Again?!" Before I could finish, mummy stormed out. I watched her in admiration. I remembered something she had said the previous day, it rang like a bell in my head.
"You may be scared now but I know an inner lioness is burning inside, waiting to be unleashed, unafraid of opinions or societal standards. But while that lioness still sleeps, this one is ready to defend it at all costs."
Immediately the tears began to prickle my eyes, the dearth of her presence choking me like a flood.
I can't do this.
My breathing ragged as mama opened the door, belt in hand with a murderous look in her eye.
Who am I kidding? I'm no lioness, I'm just a little girl that just wants her mummy back.
Mama descended on me.
***
No!
Mummy laughed to herself, not noticing the person that lurked in the shadows. I tried to run but I remained glued to the pavement which would soon be stained with her blood. I didn't want to watch, I wanted so badly to block out this scene and the effects that it would have.
As swift as a cat, a masked figure ran past her and slit her throat before I could think. Dazed, blood started flowing from an artery, her eyes bulging out of their sockets as her color paled. She stumbled to the pavement and slumped, blood reaching out for me as it reminded me of the cold that brewed in the world of which mummy had sworn to protect me from. It whispered lies and failed promises, saying that this was the better escape. Escape from a life that I had tethered her to, forever fighting against the people she loved.
I tried to tune them out with a blockade, the world shuddering around me as the masked figure stared at me. My heart stuttered both with anger and fear.
"Avenge me!" Her body screamed from where it lay, unseeing eyes staring up to the darkened sky. I clenched my shaky fists and took my stand, nostrils flared.
"You would wish you hadn't done that!" I cried.
But when he whipped out a knife and lunged at me, my farce of bravery dropped.
I woke up crying. I could do nothing to stifle the sniffles. My body throbbed with a magnitude of pain that flared from all my wounds, the sticky paste of blood now dried on my skin and the acid taste of disgust hung in my throat. Everything within me roiled, burning like a flame I could not quench.
Then the fear, amidst the sunlight settled on me and I wrapped my bruised and aching arms around my chest, staring around my compound. My harsh breaths stirred the silence of my step father's compound.
I knew I couldn't avenge her, I didn't have the courage to face Mama. I was just a stupid scared girl.
The thought alone caused another round of sobs underneath the piercing glare of the sun.
I disappointed her both in her life and her death. And yet I could do nothing about it like the coward I was.
Chapter word count: 2309
Word count: 11511
I want to thank God for giving me the Grace to write this. So, how was it? Any thoughts on what would happen next?