Turns out I couldn't leave. Not quite yet anyway. I only hope that Dad doesn't go through that drawer until I'm gone. Or unless I put everything back until I leave. The map was useless, it only had a red line leading from here to each compound and eventually ending at headquarters. I had yet to go through the files yet.
Honestly, I had a bad feeling about what I'd find. So now I sat on the floor of my room, the small box-like device in hand. I pushed the small, red button on the top left corner and the screen lit up. Four green dots were moving across the map that had appeared in the background.
They blink, moving faster than humans would normally move. Suddenly a singular red dot began to move on the edge of the screen, slowly. If green were the people who had trackers, what was red? And why were there only four green dots? It should be five. Or, well, seven if they had put trackers in the two new Outsiders.
But there are only four. Someone had died. Panic rippled through me. What had happened?
I let out a shaky breath.
There were other small buttons on the device. There were two blue buttons just under the red power one. Another green one sat just under the two blue ones. At the bottom of the device under the screen was a keypad that had numbers and letters in faded white on them.
I have no clue what the hell these things do. But it couldn't be good right?
A knock on the door made me put everything back in my bag and slide it away from me. "Come in."
The door creaked open and Hailey stepped inside. "Hey."
"Mom said she wanted you to come to her before getting ready for the meeting tonight." Hailey closed the door behind her. "What're you doing?"
"Uh, nothing." I shrug. "Just thinking."
"Hmm, listen, I know you want to help your friends...but sometimes you just have to let things work out the way they're supposed to." Hailey sat down beside me, crossing her ankles.
"I just have a bad feeling about this," I tell her. "It just feels...wrong."
"But has it?" Hailey asked, making me look over at her.
"What do you mean?"
"Until now, you've never shown any concern for anyone they've sent out. But now that it's your friends, suddenly everything is weird?" Hailey held her hands up in surrender as I glared at her. "Just saying. Maybe it's just you worrying."
I fall silent. Maybe. But I also know that each year since I was five, I watch my Dad ship out a group of people and a pit would form in my stomach. Then when none would return, I felt as if there was something that wasn't right.
I'd never told anyone that. My entire family would've said I was crazy...much like Hailey was doing now. They would tell me I was being dramatic. Hailey was only partially right about this.
Yes, this was the first year I dug around. Yes, it's because my friends are out there. But it wasn't the first year I sat and wondered what the hell was happening. It wasn't the first year I felt like something was wrong.
But it was the first that I intended to find out what.
"What would you do?" I ask. "If it were your friends out there, who would likely never come back."
It was Hailey's turn to go silent for a few moments. "I don't know."
"You're telling me none of this ever...I don't know–made you think that something was going on?"
"I...Maybe–No. It's...Kara, it's complicated." Hailey sighed. "No matter what happens, we just have to trust the people that are in charge. That takes care of us."
"I know, but...It's just a gut feeling, Hailey. Something's not right."
Normally, Hailey and I weren't supposed to be at the meetings, but Dad insisted since one of us was going to take over as leader one day. He'd pick Hailey, I knew he would. He always did. So, honestly, why I was here was lost to me.
It's not like I stood a chance against her. In reality, I wasn't sure if I even wanted to deal with the pressures of leading anyway. I knew it was unlikely that I had it in me to take care of the entire group of people or make the right decisions.
I'm pretty sure Dad saw that. He knew just as well as I did that I don't have what it takes. Hailey did. She would step up.
I'd just...be here.
***
I was in the large conference room, taking a seat at the long, wooden table. The walls were bare, much like the rest of the building in the compound. A thin, red tablecloth was stretched from one side of the table to the other. The windows were open, letting in the cool breeze and also making the gray curtains sway.
Hailey sat across from me, hands folding in her lap and legs crossed. She smiled at each person who walked through the door that she faced.
Everyone eventually arrived and took their seats. The only people who were here were the ones who were higher ranking on the government ladder. People who were in charge. Much like this small compound meeting that consisted of maybe six people tops, there were larger meetings where every leader of each compound and the president met.
That wasn't very often. Maybe one a year. It will be coming up soon.
Dad had yet to make his appearance, which wasn't normal. He liked to be on time. He said it made a good impression.
"Sorry, I'm late everyone." Dad walked in, unbuttoning his suit jacket as he sat down. "Had a few things to take care of. So, our annual meeting with HQ will be in a few months, I need to know that we're prepared."
There were a few scattered responses, none of which I cared too much about. It didn't matter to me. We were always prepared. We didn't really have a choice to not be.
"Alright, well, I have finally received word from our group." Dad began, leaning back in his seat.
My eyes snap to him. He had? Since when? Why isn't he continuing?
"And what of them, Richard?" Mr. McCane, dad's second in command, pressed.
This had got to be brand new because McCane didn't know.
My heart was beating rapidly against my ribs, making me tap my foot against the floor. Nerves ran through me like ice as my father's silence only grew.
"Well?" I finally spit out, almost against my own will.
Dad shot me a look before sighing, "Yes, well, we are down one of our teams, but other than that, we are making good progress. They did have to stop a few days to regroup, but they're back on track."
We're down a team member. Oh, God. "Who was it?" I ask, leaning forward. "Who did we lose?"
Dad turned to me, eyebrows raised as he thought for a moment. He didn't even know. I almost scoffed, but stopped when he finally answered, "Ashley, I think."
My heart dropped into my stomach as I fell back into my seat. Ashley and I had sort of been friends. She would crash at my place sometimes. She had taught me to play guitar. We weren't the best of friends, but it still hurt knowing I'd never see her again.
"Do you know how?" I ask, my voice smaller than before.
"No, didn't care to ask," Dad replied. "It wasn't of importance."
"Wasn't of importance?" I repeat. "You just lost one of your citizens that you sent out on a death mission and it's not of importance? Are you going to at least have a memorial?"
"Of course, Kara. We have a memorial for every one we lose." Dad reassured me. "It doesn't matter how we lost her, she still...died a hero. Now can I continue?"
"Yeah, sure." I shrugged my shoulders.
"Alright, next on the agenda is I need us to take a vote. We need to send out a group of soldiers to scout an area for...potential expansion." Dad continued. "All in favor?"
***
A group would be sent out within the week...and I'd be leaving with them. Not because Dad let me, or because he thought I'd suit the team. But because I was sneaking out. I had to go find Brandi and Meg. I had to warn them that whatever lies at the end of their road wasn't good.
It couldn't be.
So I'd also be leaving within the week.
I wasn't going to tell anyone. I wasn't sure who to trust.
Hailey would run right to Dad and spill everything. I couldn't let that happen.
So I only had to wait a few more days. I just hope that I make it in time.