"ALESSIA!" Robin's terrified voice sounds from his room.
I quickly run to the room, when I enter Robin runs out and closes the door, I try to open it, but it's locked.
I sense something behind me, I turn around, and I see him smirking before I get punched in the face, kicked in the stomach several times, a knife stabbed in my leg. It stops.
I open my eyes. Allan is pointing a gun at mom and Robin in the living room.
One bang. Blood from mom's head splash like a water balloon hitting a wall, she falls hard to the ground, lying with dead open eyes with blood all over her face.
Another bang.
Something hard falls to the ground once again. Robin. I can't see anything for Allan.
He turns around looking me dead in the eyes, he steps over to me and pushes a near big shelf over me, everything turns black.
I open my eyes wide open; my breath is heavy. I sit up letting my blanket fall from my upper body, the air hits my cold sweat covered body, making it feel like walking out in the snowy cold winter in summer clothes, I pull the blanket around my shoulders and take deep breaths to calm myself down. It's the first time in a long time I have had a nightmare as bad as this. I take some deep breath in before I check the time, 7:23 am.
I get up and brush my teeth and take a shower, I stand in front of the mirror looking at my body; a big purple bruise covers my stomach from when Allan kicked it multiple times, my black eye, and my thighs where my skin is lighter than the rest because of a burning caused by him, I look at my stomach again I really need that crème for my bruises, I take my pants from yesterday and check if the note Michell wrote for me with the crèmes name is still in the pocket, I put the note back in the pocket and put on the pants along with Austin's black hoodie, I put some new make-up on to cover up my black eye.
It's now 8:16 am, I walk out of my room and knock at Robin's door, I hear a low 'come in' and I step inside.
Robin is laying on his bed under the blanket, with a white t-shirt on and morning hair, he looks relieved when he sees it's me. I sit on his bed.
"I really need to go to the pharmacy, are you okay with being here without me for a few hours?" I ask him, to my surprise he nods.
"When you are there, can you buy me some sleep medicine? I forgot mine at home and I haven't had a good night of sleep for days." Looking at the dark shadows under his eyes, I nod and give him a kiss on the forehead before I walk out again.
I pick up my phone and look for the nearest pharmacy, after that I call a taxi, it's going to be here in thirty minutes.
When I get a message that my taxi is here, I walk down to the hall and past the kitchen, I hear voices from there but decide not to disturb them, I walk outside, when I get closer to the gate it opens, and I walk over to the taxi and jump in.
The taxi smells like smoke, the chauffeur has put his dirty brown-haired in a man bun that is just as messy as his white button up shirt with food stains on it. After a couple seconds the smell of old sweat hit my nose. God he's disgusting.
I tell the chauffeur where I need to go and he drives away, he speeds down the first 200 meters before he slows down again, after that he pulls out a cigarette and light it up, and now my life depends on how good his ability to drive with his knees is.
"40 dollars," the chauffeur says. I tell him I will just go and draw some money and come right back, he sighs but before he can say anything I jump out of the car and draw out the last 100 dollars from my bank account.
I hand him 40 dollars and jump back out of the car taking a deep breath of fresh air. The taxi drives away again, and I walk into the pharmacy.
All the shop assistants are busy, so I take a number and look around at all the medicine on the shelves until it's my turn. I have got number 15.
After a while a shop assistant calls my number, I walk up to her and meet a very tired looking woman, she has brown hair put in a messy bun and she is chewing gum, very loud.
"What can I do for you?" she asks me, chewing on her gum.
"Vitamin K crème and sleep medicine," I tell her. She nods and goes in the back and comes back with two small boxes, she types something into the machine (still while chewing. It's starting to get on my nerves.)
"32 dollars," she tells me. I take my money out of my pocket, 60 dollars, but I also need to come back to the house again, that leaves me with 20.
"Umm, how much for only the sleep medicine?" I ask.
"14 dollars."
"Then only the sleep medicine." She taps something on the machine, I give her 20 dollars, I take the changes and the sleep meds and walk out again.
I call a taxi again and it arrives in ten minutes.
"40 dollars," I hand him my 40 dollars and get out, and he speeds away. What is it with them and speeding?
I walk over to the gate, it opens, and I walk inside the house.
Alexander is rushing down the stairs, he pauses when he sees me.
"SHE'S HERE!" he yells looking up the stairs, I flinch, but he doesn't notice. He rushes over to me.
"Where the hell have you been?" he asks with a stern voice, I take a step back, but before I get to answer I hear loud stamps and Antonio and the rest come rushing down the stairs.
"Where have you been?"
"You can't just go."
"You're in so much trouble."
"What the hell do you think you were doing?"
They ramble all at once, and with all I mean, the twins, Lorenz, and Salvatore.
"Silence!" Antonio shouts and they stop, I flinch again but no one seems to notice. I didn't know I would get in so much trouble. I look at my feet while wiping my sweaty hand in my pants, my heart is beating so fast that I can hear it.
"Let's go to the living room," he says with a softer voice. He lies a soft hand on my shoulder and guides me towards the living room.
It's a big light room, with floor-to-ceiling windows, four light gray big couches, and two small white coffee tables on a light gray carpet.
Robin is sitting on the nearest couch with an expression I can't read. I go sit next to him and Antonio sits on my other side and Alexander next to Antonio, while the others sit on the couch in front of us, everyone's eyes are on me.
"What Made You Think You Just Could Leave Without Telling Us!" Matteo shouts and I flinch.
"I'm sorry," I mumble, trying to hold back my tears. I really want to be strong for Robin, but I can't, I just can't, I'm so scared.
"Enough," Antonio says sternly.
"Why don't you all go out and make everyone a cup of tea, and take Robin with you," Antonio says, and Robin, and the others leave the living room.
Tea? I freeze, my heart pounding harder, if that's even possible.
He's mad, I embarrassed him on the street, and he hasn't done anything yet, he hasn't had the chance because mom was home when we came.
I sit on the couch when he places a cup of tea on the coffee table, I reach for it, scared if he will get more mad if I refuse something he had made. Before I could even place my hand on the cup he had "accidentally" pushed the newly made hot cup of tea over my legs.
Pain.
"Alessia?"
Panic.
"Alessia?"
I scream. I cry.
"Alessia!"
I snap back to reality. I stare at the tea that has been placed on the coffee table meanwhile. I grab the fabric of my pants and crush it in my fist, trying to pull myself together. I can't cry now, not in front of everyone, I can't panic now.
"I'm sorry," I whisper.
"Alessia... I'm not mad," Antonio says.
"Special treatment," Matteo mutters.
"Okay everyone out!" Alexander orders, clearly pissed off, they were about to complain but a strict look from Alexander stops them, and they walk out, leaving me alone with Antonio and Alexander.
"Alessia I'm not mad at you, but I need you to understand that you can't leave the house without telling me or one of your older brothers, we were worried about you," Antonio tells me. Worried about me? It's been a long time since someone has worried about me.
"Okay," I whisper. No one says anything for a while. I keep staring at the cup of tea.
"You went to the pharmacy?" Antonio asks and nods at the bag I have placed on the floor.
I look at him and nod, his expression is weirdly soft.
"If you ever need anything you tell me or Alexander, you shouldn't worry about something like that, that's my job as a father, okay?" I nod.
"I also need your phone number so I can call you," I nod, and he gives me his brand-new iPhone, I key my number and give it back.
"Do you want to go to your room?" he asks me, and I nod again.
"Okay, you can go," he tells me, and I stand up and walk to my room.
I close the door and the tears stream down my face.
"You can sit here," Antonio gestures to two black couches in the corner of his office, "don't look so nervous it's just a couple rules" he says as Alexander and him take a seat in front of Robin and me.
"So, we talk first and you can say something when we're done," Antonio declares, "so, rule number 1. No disrespecting or interrupting. Number 2. No drugs or alcohol before you're 18. Rule number 3. Always say if you leave the house" he says and I feel his eyes on me, but I don't know because I haven't looked up from my hands since he began talking, "Number 4. No lies. Number 5. What's your problem is our problem, you come to us if anything happens... any questions?"
"What happens if we break one of the rules?" Robin mutters, I slowly turn my look up to them.
"You will get a suitable punishment," Alexander says shortly.
"So, what punishment will I get, now that I left the house?" I ask, clearly nervous, I have been strong for so many years for Robin, but now I can't even say anything without sounding like I'm gonna shit my pants any second.
"None, you didn't know the rule, so I don't see a reason or the necessity for a punishment, I think you have understood, and won't do it again, am I right?" I nod.
"Good... if you don't have any more questions, you can go now."
The next morning, I sit between Antonio and Robin, eating the best pancakes I have ever had.
"Lorenz will give you two a house tour after breakfast" Antonio tells us, we nod, "and umm, your mother' funeral is tomorrow, I'm gonna go with you, and we have to fly at midnight so we can make it in time, so make sure to wear something comfortable, it's gonna be a long night and pack the clothes you want to wear to the funeral." Antonio tells us. We nod again, and the atmosphere slowly turns gloomy. "And of course, if you guys want to come too, you can as well" he says looking at the others. I guess it makes sense, it is their mother too after all. I don't know what I expected but I did not expect someone to chuckle. Robin and I look at the chuckle's owner. Matteo.
"What's so funny?" Robin asks him, truly hurt about someone laughing at our mother' death.
"Why would we go to Gabriella's funeral, she was a shitty mom" Robin looks angry now.
"No, she wasn't!" Robin says, raising his voice.
"She was, she fucking left us!" Matteo says with a calm voice.
"It Was Antonio Who Left Our Mom!"
"Bull Shit!" An uncomfortable silence fills the room.
"Robin... Alessia... Matteo is right... it was her who left... I would never-" before Antonio can finish his sentence Robin storms out of the dining room followed by a door slam. Without a word I stand up and follow him to his room.
I hold Robin in my arms while tears stream down his face, none of us have said a word to each other, we don't have to, I know exactly how he's feeling, it's not the first time. I'm not sure what they said is true or they just tried to seem better than they actually are, or maybe it's just too hard to admit it. I'm confused, I feel betrayed, again, but I need to be strong for Robin, he needs me.
*
"This is the kitchen."
It's big, it has a long black island with gray chairs on the side and black cabinets.
We walk into the living room and up the stairs and into Antonio' office.
"Dad's office"
Now when he isn't here, I really get to see it. The light is still dim. There is a black desk, black swivel chair and a black bookcase behind.
"Cinema."
The light in the ceiling looks like stars, like watching a movie under the stars, so pretty. There are three gray couches, one giant in the bag and two half size in front and tons of pillows, and of course a big tv screen.
"Gaming room."
It's a light room, filled with all kinds of games: table football, billiard table, table tennis, PlayStation, Wii, gaming machines and so much more.
"It's where I spend most of my time."
"Cool" Robin says impressed, while looking around, his smile warms my heart.
"The gym... it's where the twins spend most of their time, they both box so they need to be in good shape."
The gym has yoga balls, punching bags and machines I don't know the function or the name of.
"The library."
It's so big. To the right are there a shelf full of books with a black wood ladder leaning against it, and to the left is a spiral staircase with books under each step, leading to some kind of an indoor balcony with more filled bookshelves.
"It doesn't get used a lot. I'm not even sure why we still have it. Maybe it will finally get used" he tells us, I crack a smile, I like to read a good book from time to time, the question is just if I can find back here again.
"The laundry room... not so exciting."
"The garage."
I have never seen so many expensive cars in one place. I don't know the brands or anything about cars and I'm not interested in them, but I'm impressed. Six black expensive cars, parked in line.
"We all have a car, when you get old enough, you'll get one too."
"That is so cool!" Robin shouts with the biggest smile I have seen in a long time.
Lorenz laughs.
"Come on. Let's go"
"This is the basketball pitch. And we usually play football and soccer on the lawn" he tells us pointing at the big lawn opposite the house.
"And the pool."
The pool is right in front of the house, and between the terrace and the basketball pitch. It's a big pool, there are a lot of white pool lounge chairs, a diving board, and a little slide.
We walk into the kitchen and Lorenz asks the staff for some three colas.
"Thanks" I mumble when a sweet old lady hands me a cola, the cold liquid flows down my throat, and cools down my hot sweaty body from the walk in the warm summer weather.
"That was good," Robin breathes out after taking a pull from his cola. "It was a long dander."
"Dander?" Lorenz says, raising a brow.
"Yeah, dander," he takes another sip of his cola, not realizing the confusion.
"Walk" I say, "dander is something you say in Northern Ireland, it means walk."
"Oh, okay." We drink our cola in silence. "Do you wanna play the new FIFA?" Lorenz asks Robin, he nods smiling, Lorenz turns to me, "wanna join?"
"No, I'm good," they leave the kitchen; I wait a few minutes while drinking my cola, before I go to find the library.
*
"There you are, I have looked for you everywhere." I jump in surprise by Alexander's sudden appearance.
"Umm sorry" I close the book and lay it on the table.
He picks up the book "Alice in Wonderland, huh?" I nod, "it was your favorite book when you were a child... I used to read it for you... every night, it was always me who read for you" he tells me not taking his eyes from the book. There is a long silence before he says something I didn't expect, "we have missed you," I couldn't help but crack a smile, but it quickly disappears again. "There is dinner," he says like nothing has happened and lies the book back on the table.
We walk to the dining room in a comfortable silence.
"There you are," Antonio says from the end of the table when we walk in the dining room, I go sit at my usual seat.
"Have you had a good day?" Antonio asks Robin and me.
Robin nods. "Yeah, Lorenz and I have been playing FIFA the whole day."
"Sounds fun "he says with a small smile, he turns to me, "what about you?"
"The library."
"Great, what did you read?"
"Alice in wonderland" He looks at Alexander with a tilted lip.
"You loved that book when you were a child."
"Yeah, I know, Alexander told me." I smile.
Wordcount: 3122
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