Chapter Thirteen
Hope
I look forward to everyday I can be with Caleb. After the first time he picked me up and took me to his house before my shift, I knew that our time together would become an addiction. We spent the day making love and getting to know each other better. When it was time for my shift, he drove me to the café and stayed in a corner booth until my shift was over so he could drive me home.
Caleb now picks me up everyday during his lunch and brings me back to his place. Sometimes we just have lunch together and sometimes things get more physical. I've learned the way he moves and I can read how he's feeling without either of us speaking. It's as if he's an extension of me and I'm an extension of him. He knows a lot about the person I am, but not a lot about the person I've been in the past.
Opening up to him is hard for me. It isn't that I don't trust him, it's that I don't want to implicate him in any act I might have to follow through on if my mother comes back. Sometimes when we have more time together I watch him sleep. I think about what it would be like to disappear from his life forever and it truly breaks my heart. I've decided that I'll just cross that bridge when the day comes. A part of me hopes that my mom never comes back and I can keep living between these two worlds until Nathan is old enough to take care of himself.
Our lunchtime romance has been happening for about three months. We text at night and I've continued to tell Nathan stories about the Prince of Pies and the young princess. Right now they are madly in love. It isn't a big stretch of my imagination to come up with the adventures they have and the feelings they have for each other. Caleb is my Prince of Pies.
It's about 6pm on a typical Saturday night when Caleb comes into the café. He takes his usual seat and I bring him his pie. We're not busy right now so I'm able to slide into the booth across from him so we can talk about his day. I love to hear the stories about his brothers and sister, hoping that one day I can be as close to Nathan as an adult as they are to each other.
It's getting close to Winter Break for Nathan and I'm getting a little nervous about not having as much time with Caleb as we've been having. With Nathan out of school, I won't be able to sneak off early to spend my afternoons with Caleb. He hasn't asked about Nathan and I appreciate the space he's giving me when it comes to him. I imagine that it might become more difficult for him to tolerate when our relationship gets shut down over the school break.
My phone begins to ring from my pocket and dread hits me like a Mac truck. The only people who have this number besides Caleb, have it for emergencies only. I frantically dig in my apron pocket to find the phone and I notice that Caleb stops mid sentence when he sees the way I'm clawing at my pocket in a panic. When I finally pull the phone out and put it up to my ear I can hear Nathan's small voice on the end of the line.
"Hopey, she's back. I'm scared." My world closes in on me in seconds and I fear that my heart will beat out of my chest. I suck in air so I don't pass out and start to calculate the quickest way to get to him. No matter which route I take, I'm not going to be there for almost an hour. My worst nightmare is coming true.
"Where are you? Where is she?" I whimper, fighting down the nauseous feeling that rolls through me.
"I'm in my room. They're loud. I think he is yelling at her. I'm going to go out my window like you said. You promised you would come get me." I nod my head but realize he can't hear that. I look around the restaurant for Tammy.
"Yes, Nathan go. Run and don't come out until I come get you. Don't stop and don't talk to anyone. Run until you can't run anymore." My eyes lock on Tammy's and she nods her head. She knows that I take care of my brother and I imagine from the sheer look of desperation on my face she can see that something is terribly wrong.
I make a move to bolt from the table but Caleb's hand encircles my wrist. My first thought is to fight it, pull my hand free from his grip but it only gets tighter. "Caleb, I have to go." His eyes search mine and I see that he's trying to figure out what to do.
"I'll take you." I stop the struggle and nod my head as a little bit of clarity seeps in through the fog of my panic. He throws some cash down on the table and grips my hand in his. Tammy comes up beside me with my purse and jacket but I'm too much in shock to grab them so Caleb reaches over and takes them from her with a polite thank you.
He walks me to his car and opens my door. Once I'm seated, the fear becomes too much and I frantically suck in air again trying to calm the pounding of my blood. When Caleb gets in he grabs my hand in his and uses the other to turn my face to him. "You have to calm down, Hope. If you pass out I don't know where to go. You told him to run, but you didn't tell me where he's running to." I know he's right and I try hard to slow my breathing.
A small sob escapes as I answer, "The park by my house. He's going to the park. Hurry. It's so dark." Caleb slams the car into drive and we are flying down the street without another word. My phone rings again and I answer it with a very heavy heart.
"Hope? It's Mrs. Sawyer. I wanted you to know that I think she might be back. There's been a lot of yelling over there. I heard a few loud crashes. Should I call the police Honey?"
"NO. Don't call. They will take him. I'm on my way." I disconnect the line and stare out the passenger window. My life is imploding right now and I have no power to stop it. I pull my knees up to my chest and hug them, rocking slowly with the inhale and exhale of my breath. I just need to get to him and then I can decide what to do next.