MARK
"What the hell are you doing?" A low voice asked me as soon as the door was closed.
"I said, what the hell are you doing?"
"No, what the hell are you doing?" I screamed as soon as he looked at me.
"Do you want it that much? Do you really want it?" Vee came over and hugged me tight, it didn't hurt, not compared to the heart.
"Am I always in your head? Why are you interfering?"
"Good, then I won't worry if you want to go and vent your shitty feelings, do it with the others and I won't bother you." He screamed again. He looked so angry, but when he was referring to others, did he even bother to look at himself?
"He wants to do it and I want to do it." I said regardless of the hot character of the one in front.
"You want to do it, right? Do you really want it..."
"Uh! ..." Vee slammed his lips onto my already bruised ones. Big hands held my head so I couldn't resist or pull away from his kiss. He tried to insert his tongue but I didn't let him.
"Ahhh!" He placed his hand on my stomach, rubbing gently. I tried to refuse every touch but I couldn't. He bit my lower lip until I tasted blood and then inserted his tongue, I tried to resist again but in the end I kissed him back.
"Ah, hey!" He hissed after he withdrew from my mouth. He looked at me before a smile stretched between his lips.
"Your mouth said no, but your actions were different since you kissed me back." he said slowly since that was what really happened.
"You forced me!" I yelled back in my hoarse voice but my tongue got stuck.
"Tell me..." He looked straight at me and whispered in my ear "...that you want to do this."
I pursed my lips when I felt wetness on my jaw from him licking me. He alternated between sweet kisses and continued to do so until he stopped next to my ear, as if he already knew I was having trouble breathing. I heard a "heh" before he blew gently in my ears.
"Mmm..." I moaned softly into his neck as he rubbed the front of my pants.
"You like this?" Vee asked with a fuzzy voice in my ears, softer than before. If he wanted to know if I liked him, the answer was yes.
I liked sex that was pleasurable and softer rather than intense and painful. In the past, I had preferred to sleep with small, cute boys rather than my own size, because I would rather feel protective than try to win by force. I preferred to have a smaller person begging me.
"Huh? Do you like it?" The deep voice remained in my ear. One hand continued to massage my face, the other rubbed my back.
"Let me go." I gritted my teeth. Vee pulled away from me, stood looking at me for a moment, before falling onto the bed. Vee's beautiful eyes looked up at mine, before moving them down, stopping at my lower half.
"If I let you go, what are you going to do about it?" He asked, staring at that spot.
"I can do it myself." I replied softly, despite being embarrassed, even in my drunkenness. Having all those emotions, being drunk helped make them disappear.
At that moment the only feeling was that of losing face because he had only touched me and kissed me, until I felt embarrassed. I turned my head, he raised his eyebrows at me and I took a step towards the bathroom.
But my body twitched forcefully, then I bumped into the person on the bed, and Vee pulled me down to lie across his body, holding my hands down to keep me in place. I tried vigorously to move, but I didn't move at all.
"But I want to help you." His voice said as he pressed me until I felt heat under my jeans.
"I will not do that." I tried to say, trying to free myself.
"Stop." Vee pushed me and held me on the bed.
"I said... uh... I don't want to." I tried to refuse but he continued to rub himself on me.
"I want to do it, why don't you want to do it?" he smiled superiorly.
I liked men, but that didn't mean I could open my legs to anyone.
"You've already put me in the mood and now you say no? You make me want it even more."
I didn't answer. The beautiful lips that so many women liked were attached to my mouth. That time, I couldn't resist. I remained still, no matter how invasive his tongue swept the alcohol from my mouth into his, swirling our tongues together. I admit Vee was really good at kissing. I was sure that many people liked his kisses and I admit that I am one of them.
I felt completely defeated except for this touch.
Vee knew everything, he knew my feelings for Bar and he knew that I was getting stupidly drunk because of Bar's rejection, and because I was drunk now. The reason was that I had to give up that hopeless love.
When he's done, will he treat me like last time? If so, how will this help me feel better?
"Where am I wrong? What did I do wrong this time?" I asked what was going through my head and heart to the person in front of me. It was the same question I asked last time and he told me it was because I had bad thoughts towards Bar. But that time I didn't do anything.
"You haven't done anything wrong, I just want you." Vee said before walking over.
"Well, go do it with your wife. Why are you bothering me?" I retorted, turning dark and staring at the person above me.
"Well, my wife isn't here today."
"Yes." I moaned as he squeezed me between his legs. I tried to fight him, but Vee fought and pushed me down, pressing my legs together with his, before unzipping my pants.
"I've never sucked anyone before."
"Huh!"
Vee climbed down and covered my hot member that was sticking out of the top of my pants. He wrapped his mouth around it and took it until it almost met the back of his throat, before sucking it slowly and rhythmically. I groaned and couldn't help but watch. Watching it made me horny.
"Ahhh..." I tried to keep it in but I couldn't, even though I didn't want him to know that I liked it. He said he had never done it to anyone, but what he was doing right now was better than most other people who had done it to me.
"Urgh... don't hold back, I want to listen to you enjoy yourself." His hands continued to rub my inner thighs and stomach.
"Ah... Uh..." I finally gave in to my needs.
"Urgh... don't push." Vee said loudly, pressing my hips down. His words made me accidentally move my hips, watching myself slide in and out of his mouth. He was really handsome.
"Uh... uh... uh.... why stop... why?" I asked as his face was now level with my eyes. It was better that he didn't ask me to moan like in the novels my friends loved to read. If he had done that, I don't know what I would have been left with.
"I want to hear you enjoy... out loud." he said before kissing me and that kiss wasn't the same as before. I couldn't even explain what kind of kiss it was, it was overwhelming.
I slowly extended my tongue to join his. Two tongues tied together, and whatever feelings I had for someone else, or the past, I wanted to tangle tongues with Vee.
"Um..." I moaned as if I didn't want to make it go away. Actually, it was the truth, I was fascinated by Vee's lips, whatever the consequences. I had given up on doing what I wanted.
" Enjoy out loud. Let tonight pass then forget about him."
"Ummm... um..." I moaned just as he asked, as he dragged his tongue along my lower body. My clothes seemed to have disappeared since I was so involved in his kisses, I couldn't help but notice that he was erect too.
"Ahh..." Vee also moaned when I accidentally pulled his hair. He lifted his face slightly to look at me, before moving his mouth to my neck.
"Uh...Uh...don't suck." I forbade him when I felt the pain in my neck. I wasn't sure if the mark had passed since last time, but I certainly didn't want any more.
Didn't want me to forget tonight? Why would he sign me any more?
"Um..." Vee pulled away from my neck, kissed along my shoulder and slowly moved towards my stomach making me moan.
"Do you like doing it gently? Don't you like it aggressive?" Vee asked after moving his mouth away from my neck. I blushed as I saw him take off his shirt. Vee's body was really nice, he had a similar build to me, yet he looked so much better.
I stopped looking at his beautiful body when he grabbed my leg and put it on his shoulder. It was a position I had done with many other people. What was I supposed to do now? Vee moved a couple of times before aiming for my back.
"Ahh... wait..." I pushed it away from my stomach.
"If you try to tell me not to do it, damn it I'll stab you right now!"
"Fuck you!" I said loudly back, pissed off at his attitude.
"What's the problem? You were fine a moment ago." he moaned, letting go of his leg. I watched him for a while before going to my side of the bed and taking out some lube and a condom.
"Here, take them." I handed a slightly upset Vee the items and he looked at my hand before smiling.
"Huh! You are scared?"
"Lie down and try it, then we'll see." I said, pointing to my bed.
"You talk too much." he replied before kissing me vigorously. He kissed me so hard I could barely open my mouth before pushing me lower on the bed and putting the lube on my rear entrance. " I just want you to continue enjoying yourself out loud." he continued.
"Argh... ah..." I tried to hold back my moans as he tried to press his head towards my entrance.
"If you're like this I can't get in, I won't even let you finish." Vee then placed his hands under my head, looking at me fiercely, his eyes full of desire. The problem was with his size, and the size of my canal, he wouldn't have been able to enter with one go, even with lube.
"Okay..." I tried to relax as Vee tried to push down.
"Stop being so tense, Mark." he said hoarsely next to my ear as his tongue licked my earlobe.
"Ohhh.... ah..." Vee pressed hard, then took off, moving in and out repeatedly and I tried to use my hand to help.
"Ah... ah..." a deep moan left his throat when he finally managed to enter but I was too sore to say anything. He hurt, everything hurt, and the tears began to fall.
"Urgh... ah... can I... I... still move?" he asked and I hugged him tighter. The physical pain helped ease the pain in my heart.
"Oh god, I'm going crazy." Vee moaned softly, before closing his mouth over mine.
"Uh...ah...ah...slow." Vee was pushing too hard and I had to ask him to be gentler, but apparently my request was ignored.
"Hmmm... What?"
"Ah... oh... Uhhh."
"I... Um... no..." Vee still pushed hard. His large hands moved to hold my waist, pressing them hard. I tried to reach out with my shaking hand to help me because Vee's hand had now moved away.
"Uh... it hurts." I moved my other hand to push him away slightly to make him go slower, but he hit even harder than before.
"Oh... mmmm..." I didn't know how long we'd been doing this, but we were both covered in sweat. The tears from earlier were most likely dry by now, but the best part was my head.
It was empty...and it felt so good.
"Ah... Mark..." Vee leaned down and wiped away my remaining tears, gently falling down to kiss me.
"Eh... mmmm..."
"... call my name."
"uh.... ohhh ... Vee." I didn't know what inspired me to do what he said but my mouth was working faster than my heart at that point. Then I saw his face smile sweetly at me. "Good boy." He didn't let me say anything else before kissing me quickly, then he pulled away again, holding my waist and thrusting quickly.
"Uhh... oh... P'..."
"uhhhh... ah... Mark."
"Oh..." I made a violent jerk, before coming all over my stomach. As for Vee, he continued to thrust hard and fast, before coming in the condom himself.
"Well..." We were both panting, I didn't care about the smell, my legs were so numb I hadn't even moved on the bed. Vee collapsed on the bed breathing heavily and I couldn't even bring my consciousness back.
I just wanted to go to sleep and hope that tomorrow was a good day.
"If you don't want to be sad anymore, forget them." The deep whisper in my ear made me realize the night wasn't over yet so I closed my eyes and let the tears fall.
I stressed a lot, I worried a lot, and yet I kept letting Vee get through it over and over again.
But I would remember it as a lesson.
I opened my eyes as pain flowed everywhere, I was all sticky and disgusting, my bodily fluids had dried up on my side of the bed after turning over in my sleep because I was too tired to clean myself up. In the end the only thing I wanted was to sleep a lot and forget. I had slept until 4pm, and honestly I would have continued to do so. Yesterday had been a really crappy day for me. Not only had I been rejected, but I had to listen to Kan ask out Bar.
I looked at the empty side of the bed, obviously not expecting to see him after the words he said last night. Those words were still stuck in my ear. That was how it had been with him.
After doing my business in the bathroom, I went out to find something to eat. Hunger could certainly wake people up and my fridge had been empty for a while. The shelves were empty too, so I thought I'd call my friend to come eat with me.
I walked over to my wardrobe to get my jacket, before going downstairs to get some food. My body hurt enough, but not enough that I couldn't walk. At least that time I didn't feel like I had to crawl.
"Forward-thinking, witty, intelligent and respected." The bright voice said loudly as I left the elevator, I was surprised to see them as soon as I stepped out. I looked at the elevator numbers, then sighed loudly.
I had pressed the wrong piano key.
"Thanks for seeing me." Kan said, smiling, before bowing to the person in front.
"Such irony." Bar laughed, before turning to open the door.
"P'Bar." I called the person who had been spinning in my head lately. I didn't know why, but that time I didn't feel as stressed as I always did. When I saw Bar smile at Gun, he looked so happy.
I just wanted to apologize.
"Why are you here?" I looked at the angry person, then sighed gently before answering.
"I came to apologize. I know how much you love him, I realized it on the day of the competition."
"Okay, come in." Bar invited me into the room. As for Kan, he continued to stare at me.
I sat and waited on the sofa as Bar had said. After a while Bar returned with juice in the glasses and Gun came out of the bedroom.
Both, with their natural way of doing things, showed that they were going in the same direction. I wanted to apologize to Bar for everything, my negative thoughts and anything I had done to upset both of us. They seemed to care about each other and would be happy. Happier than I could make Bar.
I had to accept the truth.
Bar was sitting in front of me with Kan next to him and after a long silence he began to speak.
"I had already fallen in love with Kan." I swallowed with a dry throat, bringing the water into my mouth, then spoke.
"Now I know." I replied as I stared at Kan with hostile eyes.
"If you know, then why are you here?" He asked.
"Because I want to apologize... I'm sorry for everything I said."
"I'm not angry. I'm also sorry for that day when... I hurt you with my words." Bar said slowly. He made me remember that day, but it didn't matter, I would get over it eventually.
"It hurt, but I'm fine." I knew he only saw me as a little brother, I knew he loved the other guy, I had known him for a while but I was finally ready to accept him.
"So are you done?" I sighed, closing my eyes before answering. Bar would never want me, so why was he doing this?
"Why are you so jealous? I just apologized, yet you still think I'll try to follow him? You're sitting right there, and even if you weren't, he still wouldn't look at me." I softened the last word because I didn't want to sound too harsh, no matter how much the last sentence hurt.
"Because you're not me."
"I already know, do you have to keep saying it?"
The doorbell began to ring. Gun and Bar look at each other, before turning towards the door. Even though I was resentful, I couldn't help but appreciate the cuteness of both of them. Bar finally gave up and went to open the door, leaving Gun and me staring at each other.
"Oh... why are you here?" Looking at them, I didn't know why I was scared. I wasn't sure why I was scared of the person standing next to him. He looked at me as if I had done something wrong.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Vee asked as he walked towards me, in a rather loud tone of voice.
"I came to apologize to Bar." I said, my voice shaking even as I tried to keep it even.
"I already told you not to mess with my friends." Grabbing my arm, he jerked me to my feet. Gun also stood up looking at us as Bar approached.
"He came to talk to P'Bar." Kan said, before pulling me away from Vee while Bar pushed Vee away from me.
"You too? You realize he's going to try to steal your wife, right?" Vee yelled at Gun. Both Gun and Bar weren't scared by his warning though. They knew I wasn't there to cause trouble for them. The person next to me, though... I really wanted to yell at him.
"Why are you so angry? Mark came to talk to us...he, Kan and I understand each other." Bar said looking at Vee.
"Damn!" I cursed out loud, closing my eyes and counting to ten to try to calm down, my heart was going crazy. "What will you do to me? I told you I would stop, I stopped. I'm just here to apologize. I just wanted them to know that I wouldn't cause any problems. Isn't that what you wanted?" I said, looking back at him. His eyes seemed to soften slightly as he looked at me, but then he looked at Bar to see if I was telling the truth. Bar nodded in agreement with what I had said, and it was only then that he seemed to breathe in relief.
"Well, you spoke, so let's go now." Vee said, before grabbing my arm to follow him. It hurt, but what could I do but follow it?