Liz packed her things as slowly as possible but she soon realized that she was still beating Samar to it. She threw her friend a sinister glance, pointing her eyes at the door but she only smiled back at her.
"Are you coming?" Liz asked impatiently.
"No, I need to ask a thing first," Sam winked at her with a broad grin.
Liz was stumped. What else could she do? Stay? Watch Samar hit on Red right in front of her eyes? They were now the only three people left in this classroom and Liz saw in horror that her friend already headed for the front desk. It was about time she admitted her defeat and so Liz scuffled her feet out of the room and along the corridor, hearing Red and Samar laugh from a distance.
No, this wasn't how it was going to go down. Liz turned on her heels and went straight back to the classroom, determined to put an end to their conversation. When she walked through the door she spotted Red smiling at Samar while putting his hand on her shoulder. It was now or never.
"Uhm, Mister Reddington, can I ask you a question about my essay?" Liz blurted out, "I'm having trouble understanding this source you uploaded a few days ago."
Red looked up over Samar's shoulder, the smile never fading from his face.
"Oh, uhm, of course, Miss Keen," he replied.
Samar turned around and Red lead her out of the room, taking his hand off her only when they had reached the corridor.
"I'll see you, Miss Navabi."
I'll see you?
"Miss Keen, why don't you come into my office? I'm afraid I don't have that specific source on me right now but it's on my laptop," he suggested.
Liz caught Samar glaring at her just before she turned around to follow Red into his office. If he knew what she was doing, he didn't show it, so she waited patiently until he had closed the door behind them.
"Okay, Lizzie, what can I really do for you?" he asked.
She took a deep breath and stepped closer. "Do you have a key for your office door?"
Red seemed a little taken aback by this odd question. "Yeah, why?"
"Lock it," she demanded.
"Oh, feeling bossy today?" He raised an eyebrow. When Liz didn't reply he proceeded to do what she had asked.
As soon as the door was locked, Liz approached him until there was no space left between them and pushed him against the back of the wall, pressing an unexpected kiss to his lips.
"Liz, what are you doing?" he mumbled while their mouths still touched.
She pulled away and slightly cocked her head. "Don't ask questions."
"But," Red held her at a distance when she was about to kiss him again, "I would really like to know what brought about this change of heart."
Liz let out a groan, unable to believe him. She knew he wanted her, he was the one who said he would like to see her again. And now that he could have her easily he wanted to talk?
"Does that really matter?" she asked, trying to sound not too annoyed.
"To me it matters. I just want to make sure this is what you want and that you're not going to change your mind again in a few hours," he explained.
"Why? I want you now, isn't that enough?"
"No," Red pushed her gently into the direction of a chair and took a seat next to her, "I don't want to be your little fling. I've had my heart broken and I'm not keen on having another round on this particular carousel."
Liz had to admit that he had a good point. She had stormed into his classroom earlier, very suddenly determined to seduce him because she had been afraid someone else might be a little bit faster. But she wasn't the only one in this room who had lost something.
"I," she took a deep breath, "I think I was jealous."
"I'm sorry?"
"Samar, she said," Liz groaned, "She said she wanted to seduce you."
"What?" Red's eyes widened, he sounded angry now, "And you planned to stop her because although you're not really sure if you want me, no one else can have me?"
"I do want you, I think. I've been trying to talk myself out of it but it's not really working so well," she admitted sadly.
"You really thought I was going to sleep with Samar?"
"Well. . ."
"Really?"
"You said you had the habit of sleeping with your students," Liz said, sounding a lot more accusingly than she had intended to.
"Yeah, before I met Carla I wasn't going to pick my old hobby back up again."
"You slept with me," she countered.
"Yes, because I like you. And if the sex hadn't happened I would've asked you out at the end of the semester. Lizzie, I'm seriously interested in you. The only important question right now is: you can say the same about me?"
Liz hesitated for a moment. Not that she wasn't interested in him, but it still felt like she was betraying Tom.
"I am interested."
"Why do I have the feeling there's a but coming?" Red raised an eyebrow.
"Because I'm not sure if I'm ready for a new relationship."
Red rose from his chair and crossed the distance to her, extending his hands to pull her up.
"I think it's a start," he said, pulling her into an embrace and she gladly wrapped her arms around him, "I think we can try to work with that, don't you? It's definitely worth a shot."
"I guess you're right."
Red tightened the grip around her to press her body closer to his and softly kissed her hair. They both stood there in silence for a moment before he continued.
"So, do you want me to take you for dinner tonight? Some place nice, but casual? Just the two of us, nice food and no expectations?"
"That sounds lovely."
"Just one thing. Promise me you won't change your mind until then?"
Liz smiled and cocked her head to look at him. "I promise. Pick me up at 7."
He slipped his hand under her chin and bent down to press a swift kiss on her lips.
OOO
When Liz left the building she spotted Samar already waiting for her outside. She was about to prepare herself for a fight and Liz noticed with surprise that her friend was smiling kindly at her.
"You don't look too mad anymore," Liz commented.
"Nah," Samar shrugged it off, "You know what? You're actually kind of a good friend, storming in there with a spontaneously made up essay question to save me from potential trouble."
Liz was relieved to find her smiling and joking. And also because she seemed to have bought the excuse.
"Besides," her friend went on, "Before you came in he kindly told me he was already sort of seeing someone."
"Oh, really?" Liz asked, trying to sound surprised, but another matter weighed on her mind right now. Samar considered her a good friend. They had only known each other for two months, but they had seen each other almost every day in classes, sometimes gone out for a cup of coffee afterwards, so Liz guessed it was kind of a friendship. And if she was honest with herself, she really needed a friend's opinion right now.
"Samar," Liz started, "Do you have a little time?"
"Wow, that sounds serious. What's the matter?"
"Can we walk?" she asked, "I'd prefer it if we walked."
When they had reached a nearby park Samar seemed to grow a little anxious about what Liz was going to tell her, so she finally began to talk.
"If I tell you something, will you promise not to treat me any differently?"
"Sure," Samar agreed, "What's wrong?"
"No, not sure. You have to promise me."
"Alright, I promise. Now, spill it! I'm dying here. What could possibly be so bad that I would start treating you differently?"
Liz took a deep breath."Okay, I'm only telling you this because I'm really in need of advice. Remember I said I used to be a profiler before I went back to university?"
"Yeah, you said you couldn't handle the pressure," her friend added, "So?"
"That was a lie. I had this boyfriend, Tom. He was one of my colleagues, that's how we met," Liz went on, "He died a year ago. Car accident."
Samar stopped to look at Liz. It was that look that Liz hated so much, the one that said "Oh, you poor thing, I'm sorry and I'm also glad that didn't happen to me". She took Liz's hand.
"See?" Liz pulled her hand back, "That's what I was talking about. You're giving me the look."
"Well, I apologize for being sorry," Samar replied angrily, "I take it you didn't go back to school cause it reminded you of him and everyone just looked at you like 'oh, there goes the woman whose boyfriend died', right?"
"Exactly," Liz said, surprised her friend had understood so quickly, "I wanted a fresh start. That's why I didn't really wanted to tell anyone."
"And why are you telling me now?"
"Because I met someone," she admitted sadly.
"And . . . you don't think you're ready cause it feels like cheating?" Samar asked.
"Wow, you're quick."
She shrugged. "Mum's a therapist. I picked things up. You know that's stupid, right? No man who loved you would want you to waste your life grieving."
"No, I'm done grieving," Liz said determinedly.
"Yeah, see, that's where you are wrong," Samar replied and resumed walking with Liz starting to follow her again, "If you were done mourning you'd be in school, teaching kids and you wouldn't be here asking me for advice on your new guy."
"No, really, I stopped crying myself to sleep months ago. I'm better now."
"Liz, the whole world can see that you're a bitch," Samar said blatantly.
"Excuse me?"
"Except you're not. You're still mourning your boyfriend. You're angry because you feel like life has cheated you out of something wonderful and that's completely understandable. But believe me, dating a new guy a year after you boyfriend's death is not cheating, it's called taking your life back."
"But what do I do?" Liz asked.
"Well, do you like him?"
"Yeah, I think I do."
"Then date him. See what happens. And tell him about Tom," Samar advised.
"I don't want him to know."
"But he has a right to know, Liz. He would want to know."
Liz sighed.
"Don't feel bad about it. Tom would want you to be happy. I didn't know him, but I'm pretty sure the only objection he would have is," Samar changed her voice, attempting to sound manly, "That man better treat you right or I'll come back down from heaven and beat the shit out of him."
Liz broke out into laughter.
"He wasn't a violent person, but I think he'd come down from heaven and give him a verbal beating."
"See? Nothing can go wrong then! And you know what we're going to do now?" Samar asked.
"What?"
"We're going to buy you a nice new dress that you can wear when you go out with the new guy."
"You know what?" Liz asked, feeling a little more cheerful now, "That actually sounds like a good idea."
"Who is this guy anyway?"
"Oh, that's a story for another day. Now all I want to talk about is dresses and make up."
OOO
The talk with Samar had actually cheered Liz up and she couldn't believe why she hadn't talked to her about Tom much, much earlier. Her friend was right. Tom wouldn't have wanted her to waste her life away. She knew she wouldn't be able to get him out of her mind any time soon, maybe Liz never would, and it would feel odd being with another man for quite some time. But at least now she was hopeful that this feeling might fade and she could actually resume her life, keeping Tom in the back of her mind as a memory of the good times they had had together, not as the dominating feeling of dread and loss and emptiness.
And Liz was really looking forward to her date with Red now. While shopping with Samar earlier she had chosen a short, midnight blue dress with lace sleeves and after doing her hair and applying her make up she felt prettier than she had in a very long time. She applied a few sprinkles of Coco Noir on her neck and slipped her pumps on just as the door bell rang. Liz checked her watch. It was exactly 7 o'clock. Grabbing her coat and purse she left her apartment and went downstairs.
Red greeted her at the door with a warm smile, sharply dressed in black trousers and a white shirt hidden under a coat with red lining.
"You said it was casual," Liz commented.
"It is. Do you see a tie cause I don't."
Liz frowned but it quickly turned into a smile when he held out his arm for her to take.
"You look very beautiful," he whispered into her ear as he lead her to the car and Liz felt his deep voice sent a tingling feeling down her spine.
"Thank you. Are you going to tell me where you're taking me or is it a surprise?"
"I thought Italian. You like Italian, right?"
"Love it," Liz replied.
When they had stepped into the car, Liz waited for him to start driving. Instead he turned around to look at her, his gaze mesmerized.
"What?" she asked, laughing away the insecurity that had suddenly emerged.
"Nothing, you're just. . . Thank you for giving me a chance," Red replied earnestly, reaching out to take her hand.
"Thank you for putting up with my moodiness."
He drove her to a nice and cosy restaurant in the middle of the city and lead her inside, even holding her chair for her like a true gentleman would.
"Soooo, Raymond Reddington," Liz said after the waiter had taken their order and walked away, "What do you do when you're not at university?"
"You mean as in hobbies?" Liz nodded, "Well, you already know I like the outdoors and fishing and cooking for the right people. I read a lot, too much sometimes. And you?"
"Reading and reading and more reading."
Both laughed.
"I haven't actually done a lot in the past few months. I should find myself a new hobby, I think. Maybe take up knitting or something," she confessed. It actually wasn't a bad idea, finding a new thing for herself, "I must sound really boring right now."
"No, actually, I find you more interesting than ever," Red confessed.
"Why?"
"Because I think this is the first time you let your guard down. Every time I saw you there was this enormous wall around you that I just couldn't get through. Even this morning in my office it was there."
"I tried to jump you," Liz countered with her eyebrows raised.
Red gave a slight shrug. "I could still feel it. Now it's like you've started to take it down, but it's still standing half way."
"I'm trying. I really am. Give me some time."
"You can have all the time in the world. I am a patient man."
OOO
When his car stopped in front of her apartment, Liz felt a little sad to say goodnight already. They had spent the entire time talking about small things, laughing together, eating together and she wished it could have gone on for a few more hours.
"We should do that again. I had a really great time tonight and I hope you enjoyed it a little, too," he told her after he had unbuckled his belt.
"More than just a little," Liz granted him a smile.
"I'm glad."
"You know. . .," she started but stopped immediately.
"What?"
"Well, we don't have to call it a night. . . yet," Liz said, trying to sound matter-of-factly when she was actually really nervous, "There's a bottle of wine in my kitchen. You could come upstairs and we open it and talk some more."
"I kind of have to drive," Red explained.
"Yeah, but what if you didn't?"
"Are you sure?"
"No," Liz shook her head slightly.
"Well, do you have a couch?" he asked, "Cause if I come upstairs and you change your mind I'd be happy with that."
Liz stared at him for a moment. She couldn't believe him. Red really cared for her and he was doing everything he could to make her comfortable when he was probably going crazy inside. And she realized she had never been more attracted to him than in this exact moment. Without thinking about it any further she reached out to take his face in both her hands and kissed him. Red didn't seem surprised. His reaction was immediate. He closed his arms around her, pulling her as close as the confined space of his car with all its edges and barriers would allow. His tongue slipped inside her mouth, playfully teasing her own and Liz felt that tingling again, only this time it didn't stop at just her spine. She wanted him, but she was also afraid of what would happen if she gave in to her desire.
Red pulled away from her as if sensing she was torn.
"I'd love to talk to you some more, but I think I'll take the couch tonight," he said, hands still wrapped tightly around her.
"What are we waiting for then? Let's go."