"I want you. All of you. Your flaws. Your mistakes. Your imperfections. I want you, and only you"
Arabella Karve
My hands are completely drenched in the dark crimson color as I apply more pressure against my waist that is slowly going numb.
My ribs throb unbearably every time I take a breath, causing more tears to fall down my cheeks. My jaw and cheeks ache excruciatingly as my teeth chatter against the frigid gusts of wind.
I'm 100% fucking sure my face is completely bruised, and a few of my ribs are broken.
After what feels like years of limping in unbearable pain, I finally reach the isolated road that leads through the woods, to Eros's mansion. Another wave of dizziness washes over me as I use every last bit of strength to try and reach him.
My heart pounds in my chest as I notice the amount of blood I am losing, and as I imagine showing up at Eros's door like this. This is the last fucking thing I want to do.
He hates me. And I want to hate him.
There is a part within me that is preparing for Eros to immediately turn me away so that I can bleed out alone in the woods, and he can finally be free of me. Just like everyone wants.
Maybe it would be better if I just let myself bleed out.
The worst possible scenarios run through my head on repeat as I continue struggling my way up the road. Eros rolling his beautiful eyes and turning me away, him adding to the collection of bruises on my face, him laughing in my face and telling me to go fuck myself.
Eros laughing? Maybe I hit my head harder than I originally thought. Eros laughing would be the most magnificent sight.
More tears fall from my eyes in relief as my eyes land upon the front of Eros's house. All the lights are on within the house, illuminating from the floor length windows lining the black walls.
I step up the first stone step towards the house, wincing softly at the unexplainably painful action.
I stagger to the front door and take a shaky breath before weakly knocking on the glass door, praying with everything in me that Eros will answer. Please answer.
I keep one of my hands pressed against my stomach and turn away from the door in denial. I stare out into the dark woods while standing still, as silent tears escape my eyes for what feels like the hundredth time today.
He's back and he's coming for me.
I trace my fingers along the long, jagged scar reaching from my jaw to my collarbone, like a permanent reminder that Dominik is always with me. Always haunting me.
My heart nervously skips a beat, hearing the front door get harshly pulled open from behind me. Yet for some reason, I can't bring myself to turn around.
"What are you doing here?"
I hear his deep voice sneer from behind me, venom laced in every word. I slightly relax at the familiar sound of his voice, and I fucking hate myself for it.
My lip quivers from all of the unbearable emotions as I still face away from him, not ready to see his face. Or for him to see me.
I almost debate just not turning around and running back into the woods so that I can at least die with my fucking pride.
"I didn't have anywhere else to go."
I struggle to keep my soft voice from wavering. I can't face him.
"How about you stay at your fucking house where you belong?" I slowly close my eyes and take an unsteady deep breath, more tears falling.
"I'm sorry. This was a mistake." I sob out, shaking my head. I am fucking stupid.
I quickly start walking away from him as the world feels like it comes crashing down around me. I won't make it back. I'm not going to make it to my house.
A large, warm hand suddenly wraps around my bicep, the cold rings sending a startling shiver up my arm. I gasp in surprise as Eros smoothly turns me towards him with a tug, and my eyes finally meet his.
A broken and pained sound breaks past my lips as I watch his expression shift into one of pure shock.
My face contorts into one of suffering as I just gaze up at him, trying to focus on his face, rather than the throbbing gash on my waist.
It doesn't take long for the shock to fade. Eros's sharp eyes slowly darken as deadly storms brew within them, studying my bloodied face. A sense of fear crawls up my spine as he doesn't say a word.
After a few seconds he finally speaks, the words coming out as a low, sinister growl,
"Who did this to you?"
I open my mouth but no words come out. Tears stream down my cheeks harder than before as I shake my head and purse my lips. His grip tightens on my arm, almost as if he is scared of losing me.
"Bella, I said who the fuck did this to you?" His tone is threatening but I can barely hear him as all the the emotions finally boil over.
"E-Eros." His name comes out as a raspy sob. I slowly remove my shaking hand that is coated in blood from my waist, and watch as Eros's eyes snap down towards it.
I don't look. I don't wanna know.
Eros, as an instant reaction, press's his hand firmly against it, while his other hand places itself on my lower back.
I reach my shaky hands up and tightly grab the front of his black compression shirt to try and stay up as my legs feel like they are going to give out any minute.
I think I'm going to faint.
Everything feels like it is going in slow motion as the world spins around me.
"Bella, look at me. You are going to be okay." Eros maintains eye contact with me, analyzing my pained expression.
My legs begin giving out and Eros swiftly swiftly places his muscular arm under my upper thighs. His other arm stays on my back, applying pressure to my waist, as he sweeps me up bridal style.
I rest my head against his broad chest in pure exhaustion as he instantly begins walking into the house.
"Eros he's back" I sob hysterically as the word vomit pours from my mouth. I am so scared.
"Shh Bella" He mumbles in a hurried voice while walking into the bathroom and gently setting me down on the counter.
I can barley sit up as the sobs wrack my body, "I'm scared Eros. He's going to k-kill me."
I can't even control the broken words as they fall from my bloody lips. Eros tucks a piece of stray hair behind my ear and cuffs the side of my face, "Your safe okay? I am right here and I'm not going to let anything happen." His deep voice rumbles. He's not going to let anything happen.
I nod rapidly while crying hysterically. He continues studying my face for a minute, making me feel slight comfort inside.
He nods softly, carefully turning my body and leaning me back against the wall adjacent to the counter.
Eros makes sure I am okay before he lets go, and walks towards one of the bathroom cabinets. I exhaustedly close my eyes and lean my head back against the bathroom wall.
I keep my eyes closed as I feel warm hands slowly pull up the side of my shirt. I wince quietly as his hand brushes again my ribs causing a pain to shoot up through them.
"Are you okay if I take your shirt off?" Eros's deep voice meets my ears, causing butterflies to fill my stomach past the pain. I open my eyes and gaze at him as he intricately studies my waist.
"Mhm" I mumble in response while slowly lifting my body up from the wall, and painfully raising up my arms. Eros places his hands on both sides of the bottom of my ruined shirt, before carefully pulling it upwards, leaving me in my black sports bra.
Eros inhales deeply and takes a step back while studying my body that probably looks like complete shit. I feel his stare with everything in me, as a weird sensation rises in my stomach.
"Sei fottutamente perfetto." He lowly mumbles under his breath. I don't even bother to ask what that means, because I know he won't tell me. And I'm not sure if I want to know.
After a second, his eyes that almost have a look of lust sitting within them, flick back up to mine. He clenches his jaw for a moment before he walks towards the counter and kneels down next to my waist.
He grabs the first aid kit he had gotten from the cabinet, and slowly places his hands back onto my bare skin.
Fuck.
*********************
"That was the last one." Eros says reassuringly while placing one of his hands on my upper thigh in a comforting motion.
I nod and take shallow breaths while looking down at the large cut on my waist that now has a row of small stitches. Another fucking scar.
"That hurt" I whisper in pain under my breath. Eros runs his hand through his dark hair, not taking his eyes off of me and begins standing up.
I quickly take my hand off of his shoulder that he let me squeeze as relief, and I reluctantly place it back in my lap. I miss the feeling of his warmth.
Eros slightly turns his head and furrows his eyebrows while glancing down at his shoulder that my hand was just on. Did I squeeze too hard?
He quickly recovers and after a minute, turns my body towards him. My legs dangle off of the counter as he steps in between them, causing my breath to hitch in surprise.
He uses one of his hands to gently cup my chin and tilt it up towards him, making me melt into his touch. He steadily turns my head in both directions, carefully studying my injuries.
"What happened Bella?" He says in the softest voice I think I've ever heard him use.
"I was attacked in an alley" I whisper softly, keeping my eyes trained on his.
"Who where you talking about earlier Bella? Who hurt you?" He asks while softly wiping a stray tear with his scarred thumb.
"I don't know" I shrug weakly, trying to blow off the question.
Eros locks his jaw while glaring darkly, "you don't know?"
I softly nod my head, hating that I am lying to him. Eros takes in my words, and reluctantly nods, obviously wanting to ask me more questions.
"Do you want to shower?" He asks coldly while still glaring down at me. I nod, grateful for him changing the subject rather than pushing me.
Eros doesn't move. He just continues staring down at me with intense focus.
"Why'd you leave your house?"
I freeze at the question and try to look away, but Eros quickly tightens his grip on my chin, not to the point where it's painful, but just enough so I can't look away from him.
"I just wanted out for a while." I purse my lips nervously. Eros sighs exasperatedly, visibly irritated. He let's go of my chin, bracing his arms upon the counter on both sides of my legs while dropping his head.
"Eros? What's wrong?" I ask while gently placing my hand on his cheek, causing him to clench his eyes shut. He shakes his head before darkly glancing up at me through hooded eyes. Oh.
"I just hate it when you lie to me Arabella." I stare in shock as my lips slightly part open.
How the fuck do you even respond to that?
He continues staring at me for a heartbeat, making me slightly nervous, before hesitantly giving up.
"I'll show you my room, the shower is better in there" He says lowly, as if he didn't just call me out on my bull shit.
He places his hands on my hips and gently lifts me up off of the counter, setting me down on the floor.
He glances over my body, making sure I am okay, before turning around and walking towards, I assume, his bedroom.
I follow behind him as we walk through the gorgeous, double story house. I can't help but admire the dark modern design as we walk through the living room and towards the black crossover staircase.
I wince as I lift myself up onto the first step, the painful action causing me to stretch the wound on my waist. Eros immediately turns around and determinedly walks back towards me, swiftly scooping me up in his arms.
I gasp, shocked at the action, as he carries me up the steps, not saying anything.
"I'm sorry Eros." I say quietly as he doesn't put me down at the top of the stairs, but just continues walking with me in his arms. I hate the silence.
I stare at the side of his face, admiring his features while waiting for an answer.
"For what?" We enter into his room and my eyes slightly widen at the beautiful interior.
Floor length windows cover the walls, providing the most gorgeous view of the dark forest surrounding his house. The entire room is the same as the rest of the house with the dark interior, but now with a mixture of some dark grey. Holy shit.
He gently places me down on the floor and looks down at me. "Everything" I say softly.
"Don't apologize" He turns away and walks to the dresser placed in the corner.
He digs through the dresser and I angrily furrow my eyebrows.
"No I am going to apologize." I say as he turns back towards me, now with some clothing items in his hands. He looks bored.
"I am sorry for sneaking out to the club when you trusted me. I am sorry for kissing Dimitri, even though you have to believe me when I say I never wanted to. I am sorry for telling you that I hate you. And I am sorry for lying because I am a fucking coward."
Frustrated tears begin rolling down my cheeks as I weakly say, "I am sorry for everything."
Eros stares at me with his cold eyes, "you have nothing to apologize for."
I shake my head and scoff in disbelief, "yes I-"
"Bella for the love of God shut that pretty little mouth of yours for five fucking seconds and listen to me." He cuts me off, and I immediately shut my mouth.
"I fucked up that night, so don't you dare fucking apologize for me. You did nothing wrong. And the only reason I left was because I was fucking angry. But not at you. And you can lie to me if you want. We all have secrets and I am not going to be mad at you for keeping yours. Yes I want to know every little fucking thing about you, but I will never force you into doing shit for me. Besides I will find out one way or another." He expresses with slight anger in his deep voice.
I softly purse my lips while keeping my eyes trained on him. "Oh." Is all that manages to breathlessly leave my lips.
The one time in my fucking life I don't have a response.
Eros slowly approaches me and sets the clothes in his hands into mine. I look down and see he handed me some grey sweat pants that look fucking huge, and a large black shirt.
"Thank you." I say quietly. Eros just nods while running one of his hands through his hair.
"The bathroom is just through there." He nods his head towards a door next to the walk in closet, "will you be okay by yourself?"
Why do you wanna join?
"I'll scream if I fall and die." I say with a soft smile before carefully making my way towards the bathroom.
He apologized.
************************
The pants don't stay up. And after a painful fucking shower I could give a shit less.
I throw on the large black shirt Eros gave me that comes down almost all the way to my knees, loosely hanging on my body. I slide back on my dark red underwear I was wearing earlier when I left, and decide to call it a day.
I can't even bring myself to look in the mirror, where Dominick added to his collection of scar's displayed on my body.
I pull open the bathroom door and slowly step into the bedroom, while still drying my hair with a towel.
Then I look up.
I immediately freeze and the air gets knocked out of my lungs the second I walk into the room, because of the glorious sight I am met with.
Eros is sitting down on the bed, with his back back pressed against the headboard. One of his hands rest behind his head, while the other is holding a leather bound book that he is casually reading. He is still wearing his grey sweatpants... and as for his shirt, it's no where in sight.
Giving me the most flawless view of his intricate, dark tattoos and godly body. Every aspect of him is pure, muscular perfection.
Eros slowly turns his head towards mine and his eyes scan my body, lingering on my bare legs for a moment. His eyes meet mine and he raises a dark eyebrow, "are you okay?"
"Yeah" I smile sheepishly while placing my towel on the doorknob, "your sweatpants didn't have a draw string."
Eros just nods while setting down his book on the nightstand next to him. He swings his legs over the bed and slowly stands up. I struggle to keep my jaw closed as all of his defined muscles work together with every movement.
Holy fucking eight pack.
"Do you need something?" I don't even realize I am staring until Eros's cocky voice snaps me out of my trance. I glance back up to his handsome face, where a small, proud smirk is plastered on.
"Nope I was just wondering if your shirt got kidnapped." I say with a sarcastic smile.
"Well if someone didn't cover it in blood, maybe I would still be wearing it." He crosses his arms over his sculpted chest, his biceps bulging.
"Do you not own another shirt?" I raise an eyebrow at him while grinning.
"Why? Are you offering to give me yours?" He smirks with a satisfied look glossed over in his eyes.
He's so handsome.
"Don't try me." I try to suppress the smile spreading across my face.
He shakes his head with a small smile before seeing my small yawn.
"You need rest." He says, quickly changing the conversation. I nod softly as he leisurely turns around and pulls back the grey covers on the bed.
I stand there awkwardly while rocking back and forth on my feet, "are you okay if I just take the couch?"
"I'm not having you take the fucking couch Bella." Eros says while rolling his eyes, "get in the bed."
"You're not going to at least buy me a drink first?" I smile arrogantly and Eros just shakes his head but I see the small dimple that slightly appears on one of his cheeks.
"Eros." I say with a grin while crossing my arms over my chest.
"Bella." Eros copies my tone while turning towards me, "I will be on the couch if you need me, get some rest." After a second he exits out of the room and shuts the door behind him.
"Pain in the ass." I mumble while giving up and walking towards the bed.
**********************
Eros Vandare
I reluctantly shut the door behind me, not wanting to take my eyes off of her for one second, because of the fucking anxiety I have whenever she is not around. I already miss her fucking voice.
I walk into the kitchen after a while and take a seat at one of the bar stools with my laptop.
Whenever Bella is around, I feel fucking pathetic because of the way I can't think of any thing else.
Between her long dark hair, her big brown eyes, her addictive smile, I can't get a fucking enough of her.
Today when she showed up at my door, and I saw the bruises and blood coating her face, I don't think I've ever felt rage like I did in that moment. The second I find out who the fuck hurt her, I will fucking gut them.
And I will fucking find out.
It fucking kills me to think about the fact that she thought I didn't want her here. I would get on my knees and fucking beg for her to show up at my door.
I take a deep breath and rake my hands through my hair while opening my laptop and deciding to look into Arabella Karve's history, because I fucking know I won't be getting any sleep.
**********************
After a couple hours I shut my laptop and run my hands over my sleepless face.
God only fucking knows the last time I actually slept.
Being involved in the mafia business for so many years has its benefits, like being able to find out almost everyone's history. As fucking awful as it is.
Obviously, Bella is better protected being the daughter of fucking Nicholas Karve, but still, there were some slip ups that gave away some things about her past.
There was a whole article on her sixteenth birthday party, that ended in a fucking shooting and 89 deaths. The fact that she was fucking there and had to see that makes my blood boil. The fact that she could have been hurt.
Just the fucking thought of her getting hurt makes my stomach turn.
I just found out small things from her life like small achievements from her schooling and art, but nothing that leads me to find out who the fuck laid a hand on her tonight.
Obviously she has a past with them because of the way she talked about him hurting her. The scars on her body.
I sigh and stand up from the stool before heading to the living room, deciding to give it up for tonight.
My head fucking hurts.
I lounge against the couch and tiredly lean my head back against it while shutting my eyes.
Her crying face immediately infiltrates my thoughts.l making my heart rate pick up.
The way she apologized to me for everything that happened with Dimitri, when it was me being a fucking jealous asshole.
I want to be the only one to ever hold her like that, the only one to ever touch her like that.
She told me he forced himself on her and there I was with my fucking feelings hurt, telling her that she is lying.
I will cut off his fucking hands before I ever let him fucking touch her again when she doesn't want to be touched.
God only fucking knows when the girl who made me want to rip my fucking hair out, became the only thing I can think about. Became the center of my life.
She's sleeping in my bed. Except for me, nobody has ever been allowed in my house, let alone my fucking bed.
I feel myself slowly begin to relax, until the rooms silence is suddenly shattered by an ear-piercing scream echoing through the house, making the breath get knocked out of my lungs.
Coming from my bedroom.
By the time a second scream rings out, I am already running up the stairs as my heart pounds loudly in my chest. Every second its taking me to sprint towards my room, feels like too fucking long.
I throw open my bedroom door, and it hits harshly against the wall as I see Arabella thrashing around in the bed, entangled in the sheets. Screams and sobs wrack her body as I run towards her and don't hesitate to immediately pull her tightly into my arms.
She's having a nightmare.
"Bella" I say softly while running one of my hands through her hair, trying to pull her out of her sleep without scaring her even more.
She screams in terror again causing my heart to ache, "Stop please! I didn't do anything! Let go of me!" She sobs, fear ringing in her broken voice as her eyes stay closed.
Pain and fear is laced in every word. I feel like I can't barley fucking breathe knowing that she is hurting.
I cuff the side of her bruised face and wipe away her running tears, while holding her tightly against me so she doesn't tear her stitches.
"Bella please wake up." I slightly plead with a desperate tone. Finally her watery eyes fly open with a terrified look glistening in them. Warm relief washes over me as I see the familiar dark brown color.
**********************
Arabella Karve
My eyes dart around in fear as violent sobs leave my lips. I feel a warm body tightly holding me against them, pressing my arms down harshly to my side. I scream and flail my body as Dominik's face infiltrates my foggy mind, taking over my thoughts. Every bone in my body violently shakes as my mind races with the memories.
My screams bounce against the walls, piercing my own ears. I can't see anything in the dark room as fear tightly grasps my heart until a sudden voice pulls me out of my thoughts,
"Shhh baby it's me." A deep voice mumbles, their chest rumbling soothingly against my body. Eros.
My senses start to flood back to me as my body still shakes and my breath comes out at shallow gasps. Eros's hand softly runs up and down my bare back, his hand sliding under my shirt. My body begins hyperventilating as I clench my eyes tightly shut, and rest my head against his naked chest.
I try to inhale but it feels as if my lungs are collapsing as Tara's bloody face and Dominik's menacing grin haunt my thoughts.
I killed her. It was all my fault. And he's coming for me. He's going to kill me.
"Breathe with me Bella" Eros softly says over the pounding in my ears. He begins inhaling deeply and slowly exhales, repeating the process as I struggle to match his steady breathing.
He doesn't say anything as he continues steadily breathing and softly tracing his fingers up my bare spine. His other hand rests against my bare upper thigh, calming my shaking body. After a while my breathing slowly begins to compliment his.
"Do you want to talk about it?" He says in a soothing tone, resting his chin against the top of my head. I immediately shake my head, my body still trembling softly.
Eros responds by just pressing his warm lips against the side of my head making a soft smile grace my lips, past the bruises and tears.
"C-can you stay with me? I don't want t-to be alone" I whisper softly with a wavering voice. Eros pulls me tighter against him while speaking lowly,
"always."
He carefully shifts his body with me still in his arms, and gently leans back against the bed. He wraps one of his arms tightly around my waist, and rests his other hand on my thigh, that is thrown over his torso. I tuck my head into the warm crook of his warm neck and inhale softly, enjoying the sensation of his smell.
I hiccup softly while placing one of my trembling hands against his chest, wanting to feel more of his body against mine.
"I didn't m-mean to wake you" I whisper softly as a small tear rolls down my cheek.
"I wasn't sleeping." He mumbles quietly. I love the sound of his voice.
"Because of the couch?" I whisper quietly while melting into his intoxicating warmth.
I feel him shake his head, "No, because I knew you were in my bed."
"Is that a bad thing?"
"No." He doesn't expand any more as I softly run my trembling finger up and down his chest.
We sit in silence for a few minutes, the room filled with nothing but my soft sniffles.
"Does that happen often?" He questions and I shiver against his hand gently caressing my skin.
I pause before nodding reluctantly.
"How often?" His deep voice whispers.
"Every night." My voice falters as another defeated tear falls.
I hate telling people my weaknesses. I hate making people feel bad for me.
Eros just nods softly and comfortingly kisses the top of my head. I feel myself slowly losing touch with my senses as sleep slowly fogs my brain.
This is the most safe I have ever felt in the twenty years I've lived on this planet.
My breathing starts to become a smooth, steady pattern while snuggling in closer to Eros. As I slowly begin to fade away, I hear Eros's deep, comforting voice one last time whisper softly to me,
"Dormi la Vita Mia, sarai sempre al sicuro con me. Prometto di non lasciarti mai più."
************************
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