This story is not just another one-shot I loved writing, but a dream of mine. I've always loved Hanson, ever since before they went indie. And this song, "Yearbook" (from the first album, "Middle of Nowhere"), called my attention in special. I thought it had been because of the melody, since the lyrics only hold meaning for the three Hansons.
However, I was aware I would do something with this song someday, and nothing makes me happier than dedicating this supposed songfic to the person I love most in the world, Joseph Carey Merrick, here using the pseudonym given by Dr. Treves.
There are parts with words from the original song.
I used Joseph Drake, one of Joseph Merrick's cutest renditions, to represent John's ghost. He was on the BBC series, Ripper Street.
888
Saoirse was drawing patterns on her notebook while waiting for the bell which would announce the summer vacations.
Not that she was excited about the vacations. Not this time.
Not with John leaving school, the city and the planet without saying good-bye.
It wasn't a secret they had formed a fragile friendship, never having a chance (or working up the courage) to get to know each other better. But the jocks and cheerleaders never respected him, and that was enough to become a pariah in highschool. They didn't respect her either, most of the times. She was just lucky Todd Williams, the jocks 'leader', had a crush on her. Aside from that, Saoirse wasn't exactly loved. She didn't know if it was because of her freckles or her most of the time untamed, flaming red hair.
But John seemed to like her hair. He seemed to like everything about her, he was always acting as if mesmerized, whenever he stared at her. It was unnerving, but for the wrong reasons: Saoirse felt uncomfortable with being ogled like she was some goddess. Adding the fact she couldn't get used to his face, it could certainly get awkward.
Perhaps that's why he left without saying good-bye.
And there it goes. John Merrick's yearbook photo said only 'picture unavailable'.
How ironic.
Finally, the bell chimed. Saoirse had great options for a great summer ahead of her.
But there was no John. Somehow, each and every prospect looked bleak. She'd never get to know him better.
"Hey!" cried a black girl, whose name Saoirse was trying to remember. She could only remember how the girl used to look at John. As if he was rotten garbage.
All because he had a huge, most severe deformity. Something that disfigured him almost beyond recognition.
Well, maybe Saoirse should stop judging the girl so harshly... Amy, that was her name. She never did anything terrible to John, anyway. She just avoided eye contact, like mostly everyone.
"Amy, see you in September. Hope that you remember me next year."
"Since I forgot your name and all," Saoirse thought.
"Oh, don't be silly, Saoirse," she chuckled, walking in a hurry and not stopping to say good-bye.
There was Jamie, opening his locker. He was one of the only students Saoirse actually liked, but not as a romantic interest. She respected him, which was more than she could say about anyone there.
"Hey, Jamie."
"Hey, Saoirse," he smiled down at her with honey-colored eyes.
"I just wanna say... You've been a great friend to me, I hope that I'll still see you around here."
"Yeah, I know. Friend. Of course you will see me again. Maybe really, really see me when you stop chasing ghosts."
He slammed the door of his locker, smiled at her showing adorable dimples and left.
Saoirse felt like she was missing something at that moment, but it was better to let it go. She had more pressing matters to attend to. Everytime she looked at a classmate walking by the corridor she'd see something wrong in their eyes.
Deceit. Regret. Guilt.
She knew they were hiding something. But she couldn't just point fingers. Even if, when she perused through her yearbook, no signature was good enough. No he never wrote her nothing, but she couldn't forget his face...
Unless that note, a note he passed her a week before his disappearance, counted.
She still had that note. She would cherish it forever. It said,
"Your green eyes are like gems that adorn your face."
Corny? Yes, to the extreme. But she lived for that. Their fingers touched no more than like a flutter of a butterfly's wing while he passed her the note, but she felt an electric current at the contact.
And that had been the last time they saw each other.
Their first had been the one of many, when Saoirse defended him. But he didn't allow her to become his bodyguard.
And maybe that had been his worst mistake. She didn't know why, but she knew she was right.
She should have insisted more.
More than sad, it made her mad to know that somebody knew. Everyone seemed to know. There was a lying in their silence.
She hated all of them. She hated herself, above all.
There was that girl, Katie... Poor Katie. She had been quite the cheerleader, but now, she was just a miserable, anorexic student. Every day looking more and more disturbed.
Had she seen something?
Saoirse touched John's picture that should be there on the yearbook.
"Where are you? Won't you tell me? Why did you leave? I thought-I thought you liked me..."
Then, Saoirse heard her name. She heard someone calling her inside her head.
At first, she got scared. No one passing by was talking to her, no one was even looking at her.
She felt like running towards the football field. As if she had to be there right away.
When she got there, a boy her age was waiting. A brunette boy with short straight hair and strange chocolate eyes. Weird eyes that changed colors, eyes she knew well. Before she could ask or say anything, the boy pointed to a specific place on the lawn.
"It wasn't your fault," he said, fading slowly.
Then, he disappeared.
"What? What?? What wasn't my fault?? John! John, come back here!!!"
But she knew better than to start crying. She needed a shovel.
888
Entering the empty school at night was easier than Saoirse thought. The halls were dark and quiet, but she could hear echoing off the walls the rumors of John's mystery.
It was like a movie scene. By the time Saoirse reached the football field, a summer storm was pouring. While she dug, she cried out and cried John's name. Lightining struck the firmament and she felt the shovel touching something.
"Oh, God, oh my God..."
"You don't believe in God, Saoirse, but now you'll probably have to change your mind," said a mocking voice, echoing inside her head.
A voice she was very familiar with now.
She dug, and dug. Whoever did that, knew what they were doing. No rain would wash his corpse away.
John's corpse...
And his appearance took a change for the worse. Saoirse didn't want to think that. She hadn't meant to be disrespectful, he'd already had enough. After that last thought, she could feel him mocking her even further.
"How considerate, Saoirse..."
She had no time to hear him being stupid. Saoirse looked at his corpse with a flashlight on her mouth and proceeded to take pictures. His hand... It seemed to be holding something for dear life.
"Hair?" she said, scratching her blackened red-head with muddy fingers. "Wait, I know that pigmentation! It's from the jock who likes to keep his hair long and flowing, except when wearing a helmet. I know that because it's a most unusual hair color and that helps him to keep his flock always at ready. The one who asked me out and asked me to the prom... Todd Williams!"
"When I sent you that note, I was thinking of inviting you myself," sighed John, wistfully.
She could see him again. And how beautiful he was, with that halo around him...
"I would have accepted, just so you know."
"Oh, I know," he smiled. "You're not like everyone else. You... see."
Her emerald eyes were bright with tears.
"Do you really have to leave?"
"I don't belong here anymore. Thanks to you," he tried to hold her hand, but they couldn't touch. "Don't cry, Saoirse. You'll make me sad. We'll see each other again, I promise. By the way, you look so beautiful in the rain, all covered in mud..."
Again, still that mesmerizing way of staring at her.
Somethings never changed... And why should they?
"I'll never forget you," she said.
"You tell me that?"
She smiled.
"I'll go to the police, then," she said, smirking and staring at the chunk of platinum blonde-greyish hair on her hand.
"Oh, no Saoirse... Timing is everything..." he said, smirking back at her.
Her grin was a mirror of his when she nodded.
Then he left, just like that.
888
And Saoirse saw Amy in September, indeed. The girl looked better and well-rested, with a good tan to display, like most students. Saoirse couldn't risk tanning, and she didn't like wearing much revealing clothes or going out, anyway. She had an accurate fashion sense, and liked to sew her own outfits. Sometimes she felt like Molly Ringwald on 'Pretty in Pink'. Even the students' behavior at her school was similar to the movie's. Steff was very much real and even more villainous. But unfortunately, Duckie was dead.
Amy took Saoirse out of her daydreamings and asked about the Red's summer. Apparently, Saoirse spent it doing her usual things, except for reading, a new hobby she had taken up.
"Reading?" asked Amy, indignant. "You hate reading. You won't even read subtitles! What crawled up your butt to make you do that?"
Poor Amy. Not only hadn't she forgotten about Saoirse, she also remembered trivia about her. Saoirse decided that a little bit of sharing was in order.
"Oh, you know... My new Guardian Angel. He's been teaching me all kinds of good habits."
"Oh?" Amy raised an eyebrow. "He hot?"
"He's an Angel, Amy," she said, hoping the other girl got the double entendre. "Oh, look, it's Todd!"
Amy rolled her brown eyes.
"You're so lucky he's into you, Saoirse! You're not the most popular, or even beautiful, at school, but even so... Todd Williams is into you!"
"Um... Thanks, Amy. Yeah, it's so awesome that his molecules are so well formed! Anyone would be right to be jealous."
Amy stared at Saoirse as if she was speaking in pig latin, but she caught the Red's thick sarcastic tone.
"Hey, Todd," Saoirse greeted him enthusiastically. "I set you up, you know. Today you'll have a surprise in class. I'm so glad we're all seniors so everyone'll get to see that!"
"Wow! Thank you, Brennan!" he thanked, althought confused. "Can't wait," and he winked at her.
And it was quite a surprise, when four police officers entered the classroom, followed by the Principal.
"I urge you all to calm down," pleaded the Principal, although everyone was calm, quiet and curious. "We just found your classmate, John Merrick's body. It was... It was buried in the field... The lawn. We happen to have DNA evidence..."
"Todd Williams, you're under arrest," started one of the police officers, while pinning a perplexed Todd to a desk and cuffing him. "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law."
The classroom exploded in chattering and hystericals. People were filming, taking fotos, talking loudly. Everything was controlled chaos. Todd stared at Saoirse, appalled. She winked at him.
Through the classroom's uproar, all Saoirse could hear was a happy laughter inside her head, a laughter that matched the one she was holding behind her smile.